It's Beginning to Get to Me
by Chojuro
Summary: Minami is a pretty average ninja from what the people of Konoha can tell: what they don't know is that she's secretly an Akatsuki recruit with a secret or two. Soon enough, she forms bonds with those she's supposed to consider her enemies. Will she be able to stick through the big plan alongside dealing with Hidan and a group of assassins on her tail?
1. The Masquerade

(Editing has begun as of 1-6-13)

Hello, lovelies! This is my first published fanfiction. A lot of the first chapters are very poorly written and the plot in general is a tad confusing (I'll admit before you try diving in).  
Also, this story has its rating mostly due to cursing; if you're here for the lemon, you can skip to chapter twenty-seven as long as you give me criticism, alright?  
-hearts-

I hope you enjoy at least a bit until I can get around to fully renovating this fanfic!

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Everything seemed so surreal; for once in a long time, I was actually finding myself to be enjoying things, in a sick and twisted manner. I was enjoying the life of an assassin. I'd killed... if I'd thought about it, perhaps twenty people. It was soon to be twenty-one and counting!

In my current position, I glanced around in the least suspicious manner I could. I stood in the grand ball room of this utterly huge, humble abode, looking onward through the vertical windows on the far wall that allowed the moon's caressing glow to shine within. On the flanks of the room, tables of pricey snacks and classy wines and flavored punches galore were surrounded with sophisticated looking men and women of many generations. Older generations in majority, it seemed. People presently dressed in ball gowns and masks of many colors, just like myself. Big, poofy, old-styled dresses like the kind Cinderella wore. Tuxes decorated the men; most of the color themes of their suites matched their feminine accomplices.

Chatter echoed through the recesses of the mansion. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling delicately, as if they were clusters of stars on strings. The walls seemingly glistened with a golden tint. Two great stairwells framed the sides of the common room, curving around and meeting at the top where the balcony was. Couches and benches were spotted neatly throughout vision to make the masqueraders feel at home. On the large balcony of the upper level, tables with pure white cloths draped over them held menus, silverware, cups and saucers, spotless platters, and napkins that appeared to be folded in various origami shapes.

Though I stood awkwardly in the middle of a crowd, I didn't seem or feel to be out of place. It was as if I were a little kid again, and that this place was a crown temple of my imagination.

"Hmm... I should come to more masquerades like this! If I can manage to buy my way in again, that is..." I suggested to myself quietly. I fixated my feathery mask and looked down to my silky, lilac dress, smoothing it out neatly. When I first bought it, I was sure that someone one would object to it; it could have been considered a slight bit provocative what with the sweetheart neckline. Oddly enough, it was passed acceptable; I'd received a lot of complements on it (even from the old snobby ladies)!

"Old, rich women are hard to impress so perhaps I'm doing well after all!" I thought to myself with a slight smile.

"Excuse me, miss." I looked over to the man approaching me; he gave me a polite smile and continued once he caught my attention: "Enjoying the masquerade, I trust?"

"Yes, sir," I flashed a toothy grin of appreciation, "Thank you kindly for asking; perchance, do you know where the head of this mansion is?" I also couldn't help but wonder if he knew that he was damn sexy. I bit my tongue, admiring the structure of his facial features. "This is a mission, stop, Mina. Said entertainment needs to be held in for later," I silently told myself.

"Of course, Madame," he pointed to our right toward the east stairwell, showing off his mouth of pearly whites, "Up those stairs, passed the diners, down the hall, take a left on the end, and go through the double doors. Would you like me to guide you there?"

"Uhh, no, no! Thank you though, good sir. Could you do me one more favor if it's not too much trouble and point toward the ladies' room?" I gave a sheepish giggle, and tightly grasped the handles of the purse in my hands innocently.

"The far wall there, right beside the stairs I just directed you toward." He smiled, and I waved politely while walking toward the restroom, shoving the door open.

Typical, might I have said. Two toilets and sinks; a shower that could clean ten people at once; sample soaps; towels with initials; free, laced pink, white handkerchiefs- a rich person's bathroom. It was the size of my living room, honestly. Out of my purse, I pulled a small walky-talky. With a swift jab of the button, I continued, "Minami here, what are your locations?"

...

"What are your locations? Over!" I emphasized each word clearly and unhappily. I received the same response and exhaled sharply, "Hidan? Answer the frickin' walky-talky!"

"Oh, hey. Did you enjoy being in my pocket?" He questioned with his usual, mock-sexy tone. I struggled to hold back my angry remarks and replied, "Where in god's name are you and Kakuzu-sama?"

"I'm busy stuffin' my face! And how the hell do you expect me to know where that bastard is?" I hated questions answered with questions. Stupid ones answering sincere ones at that. How did I know something like this would end up happening? I really needed to stop expecting he'd do better. "Damnit, I told y'all to stay together!"

"The funny thing about that is that I don't care, Mina-chan."

"Leader made me leader of this mission: if we fail, he'll beat me or something!" I was being dramatic, but I could imagine it happening. Let me say, it wasn't a good picture.

"And I'd help." Okay, the picture got worse. He was a bastard of a sadist... Hopefully he didn't actually mean that. "Good god, you're a twisted motherfucker..."

"You threw it out in the open- you set yourself up for that one!"

"Ah, partially true" I sighed in defeat," Anyway! Find Kakuzu-sama, and, once you do, tell him I found the head of the mansion; then get out of here asap. All right? Just do this for me without complaining, and I'll repay you later."

"What're my options of how you 'repay' me?" He questioned; I could hear the creepy, seductive tone in his voice, and it gave me goosebumps. I could only imagine the facial expressions of the people around him... Could whoever was nearby smack him already? PLEASE?

"Hidan, later! Find Kakuzu, and get out of the mansion!" I yelled. I didn't receive a reply from him, so I figured he'd decided to listen to me for once. God, I was going to hate myself after all this. He wouldn't let me return the "favor" by simply cleaning his room- it was gonna be something that would degrade me as a woman, I was sure.

I walked out of the bathroom, up the stairs- following the gentleman's directions to the head of the household. I stopped before the double doors, and took a deep breath. Adrenaline was already rushing.

I knocked and walked through the doors once invited inside. Just as I'd hoped, he was alone. Which was good, because I'd be totally lost on what to do if otherwise.

"Good day, sir!" I exclaimed cheerfully. I was actually a pretty good actor throughout my days when it came to sweet-talking.

"Good day, what brings you here?" He stood from his seat and held out a hand presenting the seemingly golden-laced room. A large grin spread over his middle-aged face smoothly. "Admiring the artwork upon the walls of success? Or possibly to chat over marrying my son? He's really a-" What an arrogant bastard.

"Umm, no, sir; actually I'm here to converse with you on behalf of my village," I replied quickly and blushed in embarrassment.

"Oh, I should have figured." His happiness coiled up and disappeared instantly. "You're of the Rain Village, I assume."

I could hear footsteps outside the double doors; from the corner of my eye, shadows form beneath the doors, indicating the presence of security.

"Indeed. This is serious business, may I say this in your ear?" I asked quietly.

"Of course, milady," he shone a wary smile, and I walked over coolly. I placed a hand on his shoulder, and leaned in to speak, but rather reached into the front of my dress and pulled out a kunai; taking said opportunity, in a strong, slick motion, I sliced through his jugular, then threw the utensil down recklessly. A chill scurried over my shaking body. The noise he made as the blood drained from his face and hurried to hold his neck was near enough to get me going.

The man released another gurgling sound as the double doors slammed open. I loved the way his eyes bulged, the red covering his hands and pooling on the floor where he crashed and wriggled on. It brought up many memories, and a bittersweet taste developed in my mouth.

Without really looking to the intruders, I bent down and rummaged through his pockets and various belongings, managing to snatch a golden pocket watch, many coins and foreign currencies, and a fat envelope.

"Drop that envelope, you thief!"

"Huh? Oh, security. I don't favor taking orders from the likes of you sound-nin," I said and yawned, trying to sound nonchalant and unafraid. The two security guards held kunai toward me with strong yet nervous grip.

I waved the manila envelope at them tauntingly, "Fight me for it, if you re-" I was interrupted in the blink of an eye. A huge _woosh_ followed after a scythe decapitating both men with a disgusting slosh. I groaned in annoyance, seeing Hidan standing above the headless bodies now on the floor, blood splattered about everywhere. "Well, you're blatantly here! Where's Kakuzu?"

"Relax, he's outside... geez, woman," he growled, putting his scythe away. "I try to freaking help you, and this is what I get in return? Fuck this, I'm not helping you anymore."

"I gave you orders! You're supposed to listen to me! Our cover is blown now thanks to you, numb-nuts!" I stomped childishly and crossed my arms while giving him a glare.

"Hey, check this shit out." I watched motionlessly as Hidan picked up one of the decapitated heads and throws it over the balcony into the mob of people, totally ignoring my upset complaints. I was surprised that he didn't argue with me over my comment on his "numb-nuts."

Endless screams echoed through the home. Well, Kakuzu was gonna be pissed 'cause he'd had to wait on us, I might as well have gotten him a a little bit of an extra pay to make it up to 'em. I snickered, rummaged the dead man's pant pockets once more and shoved the remaining money into mine. My pick-pocket skills advanced, hoo-rah!

"We should probably leave before more security comes..." I stated, walking out of the room nonchalantly. Hidan leaned over the balcony rails and laughed like a lunatic at the bustle and melodic screeching with tears in his eyes. I sighed and hopped off the balcony into the crowd, landing and jumping off of the people's heads and shoulders with arms crossed.

"H-Hey! Mina-chan, wait!" Hidan called. Ignoring him, I sprinted out the door, and after spotting the man, walked over to Kakuzu. I took off my masquerade mask and threw it down carelessly.

"I can tell things didn't exactly go as planned," he stated bluntly.

"No, everything went fine, Kakuzu-sama..." Jackass. "Give Leader a good review on me, and I'll split half this share I took," I bribed hastily. If I knew anything, it was that Kakuzu is the greediest bastard on earth. He would accept my offer, I was sure. From what I saw physically, that was his only downfall.

"Sure thing... fork it over."

Told you so. I sighed, and gave him some of the money, not caring to count it carefully. I grabbed a larger portion just so there wasn't any chance he'd want to beat the shit out of me. And of course, Hidan suddenly burst out the front door spewing curses like usual.

With an amused scoff, I looked to Kakuzu, and we shook our heads. Not feeling up for the long walk back to the base, I summoned a bird instead. Thankfully, this time, it was successful; on average, my ninjustu skills were way below decent. Kakuzu and Hidan jumped onto it's back as I gave my faithful birdie Beppin a hug, then followed suit. Summonings had feelings, too!

"Back to the base, please!" I said happily. With a flap of her wings, she gracefully took to flight.

Kakuzu silently moved away from Hidan and I, sitting toward the end of the eagle. I shrugged and hugged my knees to my chest- I really couldn't blame him. Hidan groaned for no reason and fidgeted endlessly; it wasn't new, that was easily determined. I found him to act like a little kid religiously. Midst his squirming, I could tell he was getting closer. This could only mean he wanted to-

"Now about that favor..." Hidan purred, raising an eyebrow, "I think we should fuck, how 'bout it?"

-talk about that damned favor I owed him.

"Hidan, first, shove your scythe into your mouth and run into a wall," I snapped and turned fully away from him.

"That's doable... and so are you," he hissed seductively. I felt goosebumps arise on my skin as he ran a fingertip up and down my spine. I had to admit, he knew his way around, but that wasn't exactly a good trait of his. Hell, did he have any good traits? Other than his physical features, I mean... I stayed silent and waited for his next attempt to pull something; with him, I had to be alert at all times.

"Kakuzu-sama, where are we?" I questioned after a while, just loud enough for him to hear.

"Almost there," he muttered, looked to me, then returned to his map.

That wasn't a surprising response. Hidan layed down beside me with a smug expression. There was no telling what he was thinking, but I was sure I didn't need to ask. He gave a sigh and continued, "I wonder if Jashin-sama likes you." I felt his gaze wander over me.

"For my well-being, I sure as hell hope not..." I grumbled and looked away from him, "You know, it's really not hard to have dignity."

"It's not hard for you to have a little fun every once and a while either," he chuckled lowly, and I grimaced at the sound.

"I'm aware; I choose not to belittle myself like that though," I remarked.

It grew immensely quiet for the first in a long time; but it was the good kind of quiet. It was almost euphoric, even though Hidan was right beside me, thinking of a way to screw my brains out. The firmament of twinkling stars was breath-taking. They appeared to be so close that I could stand up and collect a handful of them; clouds stained the picture in small spots, but provided warmth for the round, blemished moon. It was a cold night, but tolerable even with the wind blowing here and there. The colorful trees below waved to us in our position above them. It certainly was a fall night.

"You're very stubborn, you know that?" Hidan questioned quietly.

"You should respect her for that; I'm glad our most recent addition to the organization isn't a whore," Kakuzu interrupted flatly. Needless to say, I was shocked at what he said; it was probably the nicest comment he'd made to me.

"Kakuzu, you asshole! You're never on my side!" Hidan continued whining consistently and I sighed, annoyed.

"Well at least someone acknowledges that... thank you, Kakuzu-sama!" I said cheerfully and smiled. Hidan made a stupid comment that I didn't hear clearly, but I didn't stop to ask, instead I realized that the masked man Kakuzu probably only took time to reply to Hidan the way he did because I gave him money.

Hmm... money was the way to a man's five hearts! And perhaps... sex was the way to a Jashinist's? What logic.

"Just you wait... one day, I'm gonna get to you and once I do, you'll regret not fucking me earlier. I can make you see stars," he muttered, pouting.

"E-eh?! In your dreams, douche-nozzle." As much as I hated to acknowledge it, a blush crept across my face. Hidan noticed and raised his eyebrows suggestively. Without hesitation, I gave him the finger, and drilled holes into his head with a sickly glare.

Surprised? Don't be. Ever since I'd met Hidan, he'd been like this twenty-four-seven. Hell, the first the thing he had said to me was: "Hey, bitch, how'd'ya fuck?" Rather so than "Hey there, how'd'ya do?" It was really weird how he worked, I could've swore. Besides his foul mouth, the first thing I noticed was his arrogance... then his muscles, smile, and his pretty eyes... THEN, you got to the constant no-shirted-ness and the rosary around his neck. His rosary was a symbol of his god, Jashin whom Hidan had made me officially hate. If he did something someone didn't like... he reinforced himself with Jashin of course.

So, here we had a gore-loving, religious man that didn't wear shirts, carried around a huge, blood red, three-bladed scythe, who wore a retarded looking rosary, and had problems with making sexual references constantly.

"Hey," he whispered. I jumped barely, snapping out of my thoughts, looked to him and raised an eyebrow. He continued quietly, "Is there a banana in my pocket, or did you just give me an erection?"

I couldn't even imagine the twist in my expression; I felt blood rush to my cheeks as I tried to scoot away from him, but he sat up, grabbed my wrists and pulled me into his laps roughly. And, as embarrassing as it was to admit, I was there, stuck straddling him, blushing like a nervous school girl. Man, I was so glad he didn't have a camera- talk about black mail!

"H-Hidan, let me go!" I yelped shakily, trying to escape, "Knock it off for once, you idiot!" I avoided eye contact and focused on getting out of his grasp, pulling and pushing and shoving, until with a huge gust of wind, things were literally turned upside down.

"What the fuck? You stupid ass, you've really done it!" He bellowed angrily; I gave him a look of terror, and his angry expression didn't even even soften into worry. He was immortal, why the hell was he upset? I felt my heart pounding faster than it ever had, feeling like it was about to break through my ribcage and jump out of my chest. I seriously pushed the two of us off of the bird? Crap, this was my fault...

"This is your fault!" I screamed in the same tone as he'd used. Gravity really wasn't my friend. I really couldn't help but clench my eyes shut as I continued plummeting to the cold ground below. Hidan had released one of my wrists when we first fell off the bird, but was tightly holding onto the one in his grasp.

Three things I was afraid of: heights, dying, and Hidan. What do you get when you put them all together? Hell. Girlishly, a scream escaped my mouth and echoed in the quickly passing by atmosphere. I felt paralyzed and helpless, it was a horrible feeling, especially when you couldn't do anything about it. I began to wince and wonder how close to the ground we were...

It was when, randomly, the air was completely squeezed out of me and I was facing upward under water when I felt the real effects of my panicking. Hidan's arm was wrapped around me in a death grip, and I couldn't swim anyway. Life sucked dick.

This was one of those epic, slow motion moments you saw in movies.

Hidan and I swatted at the surrounding water desperately as we reached for the surface. Feeling the air caress my wet face, I gasped for air frantically; I was sure I sounded like a damn walrus, but I didn't care- I'd been through too much in the last five minutes. I freed myself of Hidan's grip, and immediately kicked toward the shore, and, once there, I flopped onto the damp, grassy ground carelessly. Hidan's sloshing footsteps were heard as he walked passed me a bit and stopped, "Bloody hell."

I found the energy to shoot a death glare at him and he laughed. I stood once feeling up for the walk, and stated, "I want to go home, NOW." His persistent-endless-complaint button, apparently, was pushed, because he had started whining already. I groaned, and began walking to the base with my bitchy teammate.

Assassinations and near-death experiences were routine, no worries.

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I hope you liked it! I'm so glad I finally got the courage to post some of my writing. Reviews and critiques are very much enjoyed and welcomed. I'm sure I've made errors in here somewhere. :p


	2. Review and Deals

Hey, all. Second chapter for you.

Enjoy!

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A few days had passed since Hidan, Kakuzu, and I had returned from our mission, and I still hadn't heard from Leader about it which was causing me to begin to worry.

"Oh! What happened to Mina-me-chan next?" Tobi asked tilting his head to the side cutely. I had always loved Tobi, absolutely loved him. I grinned at the masked man widely. "Mina-me-chan" was the name I had recently adopted from him, rather than "Minami," my actual name. I was never exactly sure how it stuck, but I didn't mind it. My best guess was that it started when Tobi tried to say my name quickly, causing him to annunciate my name as "Mina-me." Jerking myself out of my thoughts, I continued, "Well, after I got out of the water, we started walking home, and Hidan started complaining about being tired, of course, so we had to sleep in a tree..."

"Hidan-senpai is good at complaining, doesn't Mina-me-chan think so?" Tobi questioned in a whisper, his hand cupping where his mouth would be; I giggled and nodded in agreement lightly. "Then after that, Hidan tried to knock the crap out of me for no good reason... I ended up beating him up, though, he won't admit it."

"Tobi believes Mina-me-chan, trust Tobi," he responded almost immediately. As selfish as it was, I loved being around Tobi because I was considered always right in his eyes. That, and because he was really funny and sweet- the typical kind of person you didn't find in the Akatsuki.

"Damnit, I can hear you! That's not how it happened!" Hidan bellowed from the room over.

I looked at Tobi and shrugged my shoulders; he mocked my gesture, and I figured he got my point. With a yawn and stretch, I slumped down into the comfy couch cushion. "I'm so exhausted."

"Tobi believes that, too; sleeping in trees is not something Tobi thinks of as refreshing," he replied happily, "Tobi missed Mina-me-chan when Mina-me-chan was gone! Tobi drew Mina-me-chan pictures when Tobi was bored and missed Mina-me-chan!" He clapped childishly then leaned over to hug me lovingly before running out of the room.

"Sounds like an adventure you had there, un."

I watched as Deidara appears in the threshold and gave me a smile. I returned the expression and glanced at his crossed arms.

"I guess it'd be classified as an adventure," I said and chuckled. Truth be told... I had a fucking huge ass crush on Deidara. Ever since we'd met, really. I smacked a spot beside me on the couch while looking at him, and he took the invitation happily, bounding over and flopping down. The springs of the poor couch groaned under his sudden weight.

"The couch said to lay off the cake, fatty," I joked.

"Do you want to remind me when I ever started taking orders from a couch, un?" He questioned giving me a weird expression. I'm sorry, but that stupid speech impediment of his was a pain in the ass. Every time I heard it, I wanted to kick him in the nuts. But... all at the same time, it was oddly sexy. I'd rather hear "un" than have pick up lines thrown at my face consistently. Yes, referring to that douchebag, Hidan. Anyway, Deidara was one of the subordinates around my age; he was nineteen, I was eighteen. Before you ask, yes, it did suck being the youngest of a bunch of S-ranked criminals. Deidara, at first, appeared to be a girl. He wasn't, and if you ever looked close enough, you could tell. He got pissed if one mistook him for a woman... but, honestly, he did it to himself. He refused to cut his hair or get fatter. Those things were good to not agree to though, so he was fine as is, in my opinion. He seemed to have a short fuse, but I could easily relate; from the start, the two of us had kinda clicked. I was happy about that, considering the fact it was better to befriend than be-enemy.

It was weird though... from all this talk of him, Deidara seemed normal, but before he and I ever talked, I had noticed something odd. The first time I saw him, it was because his voice caught my attention as he sat alone in the common room mumbling incoherent words in a menacing tone. He looked up after a moment and glanced around as if he weren't alone, then saw me and acted as if nothing happened. Sort of crazy, but he was cute so I didn't care too much.

As quickly as he disappeared, Tobi reappeared in the room beside me. I looked to the papers he held out to me, and took them gently. I filed through them- there were at least five. The first couple were of Tobi and I, then Hidan fighting with Kakuzu, and Deidara sculpting another one of his bombs- and on and on. They were really good in my opinion! I was sure I couldn't have done much better if I had tried.

"Aww, Tobi, these are amazing! Thank you, I'll hang 'em on my wall, okay?"

"Okiedokie! Wait, Tobi wants Mina-me-chan and Senpai to be sure and see this one," he replied while scanning through the pile. He pulled a paper out of my grasp and showed it to Deidara and I.

I felt my cheeks burn like a cayenne pepper as I snatched the drawing out of Tobi's hands. "Tobi-kun! Wha-what is this one?" I restrained myself from yelling angrily. I could swear I felt heat radiating off of Deidara.

"What does Mina-me-chan mean? It's of Mina-me-chan and Deidara-senpai!" He exclaimed happily. His enthusiasm seemed to waver, "Mina-me-chan doesn't like it?"

I glowered at the picture of Deidara and I kissing, drawn in pencil and colored with the world's favorite crayons. How was I supposed to put this gently? Any ideas...?

"No, no... I like it, Tobi-kun... I just..." I struggled to grasp kind words, "I have an idea! Tobi-kun, since this picture is so amazing, let Hidan see it, then run back in here as fast as you can!"

"As fast as I can?" He gasped in excitement.

"As fast as you can! Ready, set, go!" I yelled quickly. Tobi took off with the picture in hand at lightning speed. It grew immensely quiet between Deidara and I. Awkward.

"What a... talent he has..." I put the drawings down on the table nearby as Deidara nodded at my statement. "He's actually decent at coloring, as much as I hate admitting it. The drawings suck though, un," Deidara commented.

"I wonder what Hidan will-"

"What this fuck?" Looking to the door plainly, I shifted to the doorway, just as Tobi sprinted into view, jumped over the couch and hid behind Deidara and I.

A door was slammed and stomps were heard getting closer, and once all was silent, an unhappy Hidan stood across the room from us. My eyebrow twitched, seeing Hidan's scythe in his hand, crumpled paper in his other, an annoyed expression twisting his features.

"What in holy hell is this mother fucking load?" Hidan asked, amused, "Where'd that little shit go? I'll shove this piece of goddamn paper down his throat so he'll be shittin' paper and crayon for a month!" My heart seemed to stop. Hidan could be freaking scary over anything- even a paper. The fact every Akatsuki member was always at Tobi's throat didn't help him any.

"H-Hidan, calm down!" I squeaked in attempt at trying to be brave. I stood up and held out my hands in front of myself, "It's okay!"

He sauntered toward me and stopped, looking down his nose at me. I was so small compared to him, the way he towered over me. My parents should have been damned for being so short.

"You're my bitch, not that faggot, girly-man's," he retorted; I wouldn't have been surprised if he randomly started hissing at me like a rabid raccoon... My face twisted in disbelief and I smacked Hidan's arm. "I don't recall agreeing to be your or Deidara-kun's bitch! For the record though, I do actually like Deidara better than you!"

"You don't have to agree to it because it's a fucking fact!" Hidan loudly yelled, then quieted to a "seductive" whisper, "You know you like being my bitch, Mina-chan."

"Fuckin' idiot. I'm sure you've said this to just about every girl you've come across therefore, I'm far from unwilling to even consider letting you get in my pants. I'd choose Deidara over you any day. Now, leave Tobi and I alone," I muttered unhappily, waving him away. He gave me a sincerely upset expression before slumping a little and trudging slowly out of sight, the end of his scythe scraping the ground a bit as he went. What the fuck? He actually listened? And he looked like he took my comments to heart? Those weren't the traits of Hidan- those were the traits of a normal human being...

Weird.

"Okay then... anyway, now that he's gone, Tobi-kun, we need to talk," I mumbled while turning to face Deidara and he. Deidara's expression mimicked mine, I wasn't surprised to see. Tobi sluggishly sat in the spot where I'd earlier been sitting and looked up to me. I could tell he knew he "did wrong." I looked to the blonde male beside him and gave him a sheepish grin; his eyebrows knitted together- he could tell I was gonna let Tobi off the hook.

"Next time, tell me you're gonna draw something like that first, okay?" I said and sighed in defeat. I hated having to get onto Tobi, it just never felt right. Mainly because it was never anything genuinely "wrong."

"Now... let's get go some ice cream, okay?"

"Tobi made one of Tobi and Mina-me-chan, too... But it's okay because it's ICE CREAM TIIIIME!" A gasp escaped the masked man as he sprang to his feet. Deidara grumbled something to himself, but all I heard was "un." I watched as the child-like characteristic bearing man ran out of the room straight into the kitchen. The freezer released a distinguishable squeak and signified that Tobi had the ice cream. I looked at Deidara, and he shot me a glare. "You have no spine, un."

"H-hey! I do, too! I just despise yelling at Tobi... I love the little squirt, he's a great guy," I denied and reasoned.

"He's annoying as hell, he just doesn't show it to you because you're a girl, un," he muttered.

"Well... I honestly don't have a problem with that," I released a quiet laugh, "I have to put up with enough jackasses as it is."

Deidara rolled his eyes and waved, "I'm not sticking around for the ice cream party. Later, un." I waved, and the blonde left the same way Hidan and Tobi did. Silence filled the room as I stood alone. I couldn't help but feel guilty for being an ass to Hidan... even though it was his fault I even thought about being an ass to him anyway. I desperately fought the need to go and try to make it up to him, apologize at least for the very weak insults I threw at him.

No, if I went and tried to make things better, something would end up happening to me. Just get some ice cream. I groaned and started walking through the threshold to the hallway which eventually led to the kitchen. I peeped in the doorway and saw Tobi stacking multiple scoops of ice cream upon one another. That ice cream looked amazing, especially since it was chocolate... I bit my lip and hesitantly took a step backward, turning to approach Hidan's room.

Okay, since I felt like I had to apologize, I was gonna do it quick before he could yell or pull something stupid. I inhaled deeply and released it all the same before knocking on the door lightly. Surely he wasn't gonna yell at me... and if he did, Jashin so help me, I'd shove his scythe straight up his ass.

"Who the fuck is it?" Hidan's voice called flatly in annoyance. I mumbled under my breath and open his door. "Mina, of course," I quietly replied. I glanced around his room. It's generally plain- two beds with black sheets and comforters, white, fluffy (and darn comfortable) pillows, two closets, a bathroom, Hidan's scythe, books and magazines, chips, drinks, a safe, a desk, and other boy stuff. Minus the boy stuff, his room was just like mine.

"That bastard Kakuzu isn't here, so you don't really have a reason to be here," Hidan spat at me. I shot him an unimpressed look; he raised an eyebrow expectantly, shifting in his spot on one of the beds and patting down a stray hair to his head.

"Okay, jackass, thanks for stating the obvious," I growled, then regained composure, "Hidan, don't be like that; you haven't even given me a chance to say anything."

"Well, what the fuck do you have to say to me then?" He asked quietly. I looked to my right as he stood up and approached me, then crossed his arms.

I sighed, "Even though it was your fault I was a dick to you and you don't have a right to be the 'over-protective' idiot that you are, I'm sorry. Don't be upset, alright?" Hidan looked down at me in confusion and started laughing his ass off. Hidan was definitely the type of person that made me feel like the scum of the earth, it didn't matter what the subject was over. He gave a quick, loud, over-dramatic sigh. "Man, I was just fuckin' with you, Mina-chan."

"What the hell? You fag, I swear I'm gonna beat the living shit out of you!" I yelled and punched his arm angrily.

"Obviously you came here to give me a fucking apology, so what it Jashin-sama's name are you doing trying to molest me for?" He teased while dodging each of my swings.

I stopped and glared at him, clenching my fists; a blush rose upon my cheeks. "Molest?! I'll show you damn molestation!" Without really thinking about it first, I jumped on him, coincidentally, the two of us fell to the floor.

"Goddamn, woman!" He yelled; I could hear a smirk in his voice, and the fact that I was straddling him did not help. I punched him in the chest and continued to do so with the other hand, but he caught it before I could land the blow. Fury pulsed through my veins so I didn't bother to stop and think about the perverted scenes going on in his head. I actually worried about his feelings, but he was fucking around in the end? He caught my other fist.

"I felt guilty for being an ass to you!" I whined, "Goes to show I shouldn't give a flying shit about you..."

"Why'd you feel guilty?" He roared to life with mocking laughter. I blushed again, huffing, "Well... you started acting different, so that logically signified that it upset you."

Hidan looked at me and smiled, but I glared at him, silently telling him to keep quiet, and continued, "And it's my job as a woman to do all the worrying around here." Ugh, that sounded sexist.

"Don't worry too damn much or you'll get gray hair. Nasty, old hag," he replied with his signature, I'm-retarded-so-I-have-to-laugh-as-loud-as-possible laugh following.

"Excuse you! You're the one with the nasty, old person hair!" I yelled unhappily, "Now let go of my hands, you creep!"

"The one who sat on my dick calls me a creep? That's not ironic," he smirked and looked downward to the said object- and my crotch, too, but that was a given. I slammed my legs shut and pretty much dropped my head on them. "What the fuck, I'm sitting on your stomach!"

To prove my point I bounced up and down, "I don't feel anything jabbing my ass, so I'm sitting on your tummy!" Hidan groaned with a grin, "Fuck, do that again."

"Save your breath, you'll need it to blow up your date later." My face reddened. "For the last time, let me go." I could never figure out why he found so much joy in picking on me.

"No, bounce on me again, it's like a massage or some shit like that," he attempted at reasoning.

_Knock, knock, knock._ I jerked my head toward the door so fast that it hurt.

"What the hell is going on in there?" Came the voice; I didn't struggle to determine who exactly it belonged to. The door was slammed open revealing our all-time-favorite greedy bastard, Kakuzu. The tan male's eyes widened, then resumed regularly. I couldn't imagine my expression; I was like a kid who got caught having sex. Hell, it was close enough. "Hidan, let her go; I'm sure she isn't ready to lose her virginity to a lousy son of a bitch like you."

"Thank you, Kakuzu-sama!" I beamed in appraisal, then muttered, "At least one person understands..." Kakuzu scanned the room before walking over to what I guessed was his side of the room. A small desk sat in the corner, a chair, and a decently large safe at it's side. He took his spot at the desk and started scrawling words down on paper. I wondered if it was hard for him to ignore us. Hidan randomly sat up, and, coincidentally, I slid down on his stomach and was kept in place between his torso and legs. Hidan's grip slipped to my wrists as I tried and wrenching myself from his grasp.

"Fucking jerk..." I complained.

"You wanna call names? Okay, cumstain." He retorted snickering immaturely. Cumstain? _Really?_

I felt my jaw drop. "What the hell! I'm just trying to to get you to let me-"

"Dick-breath."

"Pissweasel!"

"Shit-face."

"Cock biscuit!"

It grew quiet. I was never very good with creating insults on the spot. I sounded like an idiot. Hidan burst out laughing, "'Cock biscuit? What the fuck kind of insult was that?" I glowered at him in annoyance and rolled my eyes as he continued his laughing spree. How long had it been since I walked in here? My ice cream was melting, damn it, and Tobi sure as hell probably didn't think to put it back in the freezer. "Okay, I'm done..." He chuckled, but then started giggling aaallll over again.

"Hidan!"

"Okay! Shit, woman, quiet down! Anyway... I'll let you go if you be my bitch." He said rather plainly.

"Hell no. We've had this conversation," I replied.

"Just for a day?"

"No."

"Fine, I'll rape you then," he said. I give him a look of disbelief and with an evil grin, he let his legs fall to the ground. I squeaked in embarrassment, feeling something hard prod me in a place that should definitely not be prodded.

"Okay, okay! One day- and I mean one, damn it! That was _NOT_ funny." I yelled, scurrying to my knees. I'd get raped either way... He released a sexy growl. "You'll listen to me, and do what I say for a whole day?" I gave him a barely discernible nod.

"Sweet Jashin, you're in for a time."

It'd been a full twelve hours into it, and honestly, I was feeling up for punching a freaking baby. Surprisingly, it wasn't what I'd imagine it to be. I'd've figured that he'd make me foreplay with him... something like that, at least. I mean, it didn't bother me that he hadn't wanted to do that kind of thing, it just surprised me. It was almost like he was lying about me being "in for a time." Still, even without the perverted shit, it was torture. I was like his dog for God's sake! Not to mention the fact I was supposed to answer to "bitch." Wow, ironic- dog, bitch... you get it? Okay, that sucked... Anyway! After I had agreed to "being Hidan's bitch for a day," I convinced him to, in turn for my favor, give Leader a good review on the mission we had yesterday. That mission was my first in my time being in this organization (even though I joined months ago); so, obviously, my accomplices would eventually have to give Leader a review on me.

God knew I was desperate for a good review. I was just glad I was able to tie it in with this for once non-perverted scenario.

So maybe this was a win-win situation?

"Bitch, make me lunch!" Hidan called from the common room.

No way. I grunted as I stood from the pile of laundry I was tending to, and continued to walked out of his room into the kitchen. Sadly, Tobi ended up eating all the ice cream in case you were wondering. I opened the fridge and scanned the shelves. "Hidan, what the hell do you want to eat?" I yelled back at him.

"Hmm... A cheeseburger! Chop, chop!" I didn't know how to cook a freaking cheeseburger though! We didn't even have hamburger meat anyway! I slumped, taking a jar from the highest shelf, and slammed the fridge closed. Peanut butter and jelly would have to work. I got two pieces of bread and the peanut butter and jelly and made Hidan his sandwich. I grabbed a plate and put the sandwich on it. With a frown, I noticed that it looked a little lonely, so I got some chips just to make it look like I wasn't being lazy... Perfect! I was always great with culinary arts.

"Here you go, princess," I muttered and tossed the plate down on the coffee table.

"What the fuck is that?" He looked at the plate of food as if it were roadkill.

"My signature. Enjoy," I retorted with a scowl and walked out of the room.

Damn, when was Leader going to ask Kakuzu and Hidan for my review? Did he even remember that I exist? I hadn't seen around him in forever anyhow...

"Mina-chan, it's nice to see you're doing well."

I spun around in surprise. Wow, I'd been wondering about Leader ever since I got back, and I could've just talked to her!

"Konan-chan! It's been a long time!" I beamed and lightly hugged her, "I swear, you and Leader are freaking magic- here one minute, gone in a puff of smoke in the next." Konan giggled a little and fixated her cobalt blue hair around her bright, sparkling, pale face. "Sorry to worry you; it's a habit of ours, as you've gathered." Konan was such a good, gentle spirit. Sweet and kind consistently, yet strong when needed to be. I really admired her for that. I suppose you could consider me to be "strong" when I needed to be, but I thought I had troubles when attempting to be nice as often as possible, especially with jerks like Hidan around. I thought that was why Leader kept her so close; she was a woman that deserved appraisal. And, damn, she was good at origami.

"Well, I was just wondering where Leader was," I stated a bit quietly.

"Ahh, for your first review, I assume?" She asked; I nodded in agreement, encouraging her on, "He and I just got back from our previous mission. I was sent for you, actually. He wants to see you in the central office."

"Oh, really? Thank you, Konan-chan, I'll see you around. Stop disappearing so much!" The two of us exchanged smiles and I went on my way to Leader's office. It was either success or impending doom. I knocked on the double doors of Leader's office strongly, but not too strongly. I didn't want to piss him off, that was for sure.

"Come in." I took a deep breath and opened the doors, walking in a bit shyly. To my surprise, I saw Kakuzu standing before Leader's desk already. There was something in his gaze that befuddled me; I couldn't ask, but there was something odd there... like he was silently scolding me for doing wrong. Maybe it was my imagination; I sure as hell hoped so. I stood beside my teammate, gazing in Leader's direction. Hidan burst in the door with puffed up cheeks. I hold in a laugh, and he looked around like he didn't know what I thought was funny. After swallowing the last of his sandwich, he comments, "That sandwich was the shit. I dunno what you did to it, bu-"

"If you're through," Leader cut in. Hidan childishly cast him a mocking look, and I looked forward, finally deciding to pay attention. Leader cleared his throat, "Kakuzu has given me his review; I must say, other than your inability to keep secrecy, I'm impressed. Now, Hidan, your review, please."

"Fuckin' awesome," he replied boredly.

"I understand you're the reason for her possible failure on this mission," Leader said, not amused in the least.

"Well... technically-"

"Yes, he was the reason, Leader-sama," Kakuzu replied for the Jashinist.

"A deal is a deal- seeing as how your mission was a success, you're considered up to par here," he proclaimed, "but before we figure who you'll be replacing after death (I was technically a back up for time being), there's something I need to discuss with you alone, Minami." Lack of honorific? I muttered a complaint silently. Was he belittling me? Kakuzu sent me a look of concern, and followed the careless Hidan out of the room, shutting the doors behind him. Was it just me or did the lights dim afterward? Erm...

"Because of your recklessness, we as an organization are being targeted," My jaw dropped. What? Recklessness? When? How did he know anyway? He wasn't there! Leader continued barely trying to cover his anger, "Within your mission, you took a document of another nation's. Due to this, we're being targeted by a squad of top quality assassins that've never failed a mission assigned to them. Bounty is already on all of our heads, but yours and Hidan's are currently the highest. Would you like to enlighten me on what you plan on doing to assure our safety?"

My eyes widened. What the hell did I do now?

* * *

Well there ya have it- second chapter. Fanfics are fun~  
I've always disliked short chapters in fanfics, so I'm working against that... I see why alot of people don't type really long chappies, talk about freaking time consuming. Three days to get this whole chapter planned and typed without distractions... Anyway, we all finally figured out what Mina-me-chan messed up on! The summary makes sense, finally! Good job, Mina, you freaking dumbass! ^^  
Anyway, thanks to StarnightX for being my first EVER review! I love you with a burning passion; you'll always be remembered as my first. That doesn't sound right. xD  
I hope you liked this chapter. I'll try and update when I can!


	3. Karma's a Bitch

Hiya~ I finally have the next chapter up... like, months after I last posted... -.-  
I have to apologize for that. You wouldn't believe how busy I've been the past few months, ish a mess.  
I actually had reviewers this whole time, and I hadn't known about it.

Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

I sighed as I tapped my fingers impatiently on the desk I was sitting at in a pattern from the right to the left. Konan was doing my nails very, very, VERY carefully; she didn't want to miss a spot as she did so. All in all, I thought of how I wouldn't be surprised if thirty minutes had already gone by. I probably shouldn't have been complaining. If Tobi tried to do my nails, I'd look like a kid that just got done finger painting so at least after she was done, they would look absolutely gorgeous. I continued tapping my fingernails on the glass surface repetitively.

"Don't," she said politely. I laid my hand down flat on the table as she continued, "You'll chip a nail." I sighed sharply, boredly, and looked around for something else to entertain me... Nothing whatsoever. With a small huff, I continued watching in silence. It was so quiet, I could actually hear the ticking of the clock upon the wall. It was a bit nerve racking.

"Konan-chaaan," I stretched the name of the girl across the table from me with a hint of a whine. She didn't even look up at me, but simply raises an eyebrow.

"I only wanted French tips... I mean, they look great, but I think yo-" Konan's finger slipped slightly, and she grimaced with an annoyed growl; for that, you could add, at least, ten more minutes to this process. I lowered my head and roll my eyes in annoyance hoping she hadn't seen me doing so. I was going to tell her that she was going a bit overboard, but I let it go. French tips were when you paint the tips of your nails white. It wasn't supposed to be anything super duper nifty, it just added a little class to your look. Anyways, aside from that, I supposed this was a good time to think about what I should begin to do to save all of our skins from those hired assassin ninja, seeing as how I had all the time in the world...

"Enlighten you on how I'mma keep all of 'us' safe? You sure as hell aren't the one in danger! Hidan and I are the ones being targeted, as you just said, so don't pin this shit about your safety on me," I growled. I, obviously, was definitely far from happy as I continued, "It's not my damn fault that Hidan shoved me off my own summoning, and the documents were lost!"

"It's your fault it was taken in the first place," he retorted calmly. What an ass.

"So? Things happen. None of this has anything to do with you anyhow; by the way, we're a top notch, evil, S-ranked organization of assassins, too, if you forgot. Just 'cause those other faggots haven't failed a mission before doesn't mean they won't fail their assignment to kill us. You're such a worry wart," I muttered childishly.

"If something happens to anyone in this organization because of our newly gained enemies, it's on your head. I'd be damn careful if I were you, I'm not fucking around." Whoooaa, dude! Leader cussed- twice! Well, he must've been pissed. I bit my tongue to keep from making my smart remarks audible as he continued, "The assassin squad is made up of four, elite ninjas. Two of them, siblings, being from the Stone Country and the other two, unrelated, being from the Lightning and Leaf Country. They're highly regarded as-"

"Uh-huh, alright, whatever you say, Leader," I gave him a nonchalant wave and walked out of the room.

Problem solved!

It wasn't hard to come up with a conclusion: I just couldn't let anyone get hurt by this squad of ninja. See? Simple. I don't see why he always underestimated me...

"Miiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnaa-meeeeee-chaaan!" Konan jumped with such force that she knocks all of her finger nail painting supplies over; the small bottle of paint flew out of her grasp along with the brush. A death glare decorated her delicate face as she stood and turned to the source of the ruckus. I looked at my nails and almost wailed in sorrow. Konan's fingerprints were seen decorating the coating. How in hell ALL of them got messed up, I had no clue, it was better to not ask. Unsurprisingly, the masked man known as Tobi ran in the room flailing his arms around madly. Nonsense spewed from his mouth as a huge bang is heard.

"Tobi! What did you do to Deidara-kun this time?" I muttered. I closed my eyes waiting for a response from him irritatedly. I really was not up for Tobi and Deidara's bickering. I couldn't say Hidan and I are any better than the two of them, but at least I tried to cut the fighting off with that bastard. Everyone knew it was always Hidan's fault regardless, that was just an obvious fact of nature, honestly. I cracked my right eye open and gazed in the direction of where Tobi stands. The masked man wasn't anywhere to be seen; I opened both of my eyes and grasped my hips while scanning the perimeter of the room. Konan was gone, too... I couldn't help but make an odd face as I pondered on what's going on. The room grew darker and seemed to spin.

The shadows casted by my surroundings seemed to blend together and consume my vision in total blackness. I couldn't see my hand in front of my face- it's was dark- or hear anything except my heavy, rugged breathing; I stumbled forward silently as I slowly pulled a kunai from the pouch on my right leg. Something, blatantly, wasn't right. I closed my eyes, as if it really made a difference anyway, and focused. If I was gathering things correctly, I knew what was wrong. I stood totally still and breathed deep while slowing my chakra flow slower and slower until it eased to a stop.

"She broke it, Kaito-kun." The shy, feminine voice came as the tinkling of a bell. It sounded so pristine and clear cut and quick. It echoed shortly like a ripple effect traveling into every crease and recesses of my surroundings. All at once, the silence that was filling my ears immediately resides and I, what seems like wake up, to complete and utter chaos.

"Stupid whore," I could easily determine the owner of the voice heard. Hidan. My eyes fluttered open as I looked up just as the Jashinist steps in front of me and almost stepped on me, if I may have added, and completed a fighting combo with a swing of his three-bladed scythe. He missed his target, I guessed, because a stream of curses hung from his lips loosely. His gaze flickered toward mine, then back upward. "You just gonna sit there like a dumbshit, Mina-chan?"

"Well, I wouldn't if I knew what the hell was goin' on!" I growled angrily and continued, "And you know as well as I do that I am not a dumbshit, asshole." I hopped to the balls of my feet and stand back to back with Hidan. "So enlighten me."

"What's there to 'enlighten?' Those assassin fuckers blew the goddamn wall in, put you in a genjustu- good enough?" He retorted.

"Okay, calm the fuck down!" I slapped his arm quickly and gripped the kunai that I'd been, apparently, holding the whole time. "So, if they're trying to kill me, or us -whoever- where'd they go?"

"How the fuck should I know? It's like I was fighting a shadow or something from the damn start," he replied. I wished he wasn't always consistently upset. He'd be so much easier to handle and so much more likable if he knew how to act sanely.

"So... you were fighting the air...?" I asked in confusion, "Am I gathering this the right way, or did you give me a concussion while you were acting like a lunatic?"

"Jashin, can you just shut the fuck up for once instead of asking so many fuckin' questions?" He roared. I had to admit, I was taken a bit aback by his tone, even if it was Hidan I was talking to.

"As soon as you can quit being a prick, sure, I will!" I yelled and began walking toward the door while muttering, "I hope you burn, religious faggot..." Hidan audibly growled; yeah, I thought he heard my comment. I didn't stop to acknowledge that fact, just kept stumbling to the threshold.

It happened so quickly I barely had time to breathe. Almost silently, the same feminine voice I heard before pierced the silence. I couldn't make out what she said, but I heard her.

A bit befuddled, I started to look to the source between Hidan and I from where I heard the noise, but what I saw was totally opposite of what I had expected. Hidan's shadow, without his own movement, stretched toward me and slid down the wall to the floor; from the puddle of darkness, a human body, a male one, scrawled to his knees, and began to start to his feet. I squeaked in surprise as Hidan grunted and seemed to simply flick his wrist in a circular motion with his scythe following suit. The three blades ripped their prey smoothly and exited the body proudly, glistening in the light. A nasty gurgling emitted from the shadow crawler's throat and his figure shook with miscellaneous tremors. I squinted, watching as ribbons of red string from the fatal wound on his back and hug his body, trailing around his defined chest where it fell to the ground in a thick pool.

"Well, that takes care of one of those assassin fuckers," Hidan glowered. As he spoke, the corpse crashes into the ground. "Assassin fuckers..." I was guessing that was Hidan's name for them, seeing as how he'd said it so many times. I gave him a look of disapproval, but it softened into confusion. "That was too easy though... They're top trained. If that was top trained, Leader is full of bullshit."

"Why does that fucking surprise you?" He questioned blandly. I was tempted to point out and say look who's talking, but I kept my mouth shut and glanced around the room for sign of any other intruders.

"You worry too damn much, woman," he muttered then made his way to the door. I grabbed the Jashinist's cloak gently and give it a tug before continuing, "Okay... Well, since that's over, are you just gonna leave that body there?" Hidan turned to me and I let his jacket go. He scratched the back of his head leisurely and yawned, "Nah, either Konan will get it or I'll use it for a sacrifice later."

"Thank you for yawning in my face. Get a breath mint," I said sourly and walk around him and down the hall. And, of course, being the douche he was...

"Yeah, fucking right!" He followed behind me closely and spanked me, making me nearly jump out of my skins.

"Hidan!" I punched him in the stomach repeatedly while flailing around all hot and bothered by his ridiculous behavior; he watched silently. It really led to no avail, me trying to "beat him up," as I thought I could for a moment. I ended up hurting myself in the end, typically. I stomped and held my throbbing fist to my chest. Hidan laughed in amusement and put a hand on my shoulder while leaning down to my lowered head.

Goosebumps raise over my skin as his breath ran down my neck. I stared at my feet intently. I was too afraid of what he may have pulled once I looked up. I mean for Christ's sake, he was, like, trying and to get in my face to simply embarrass me. Well, I thought so...

"Is your hand alright?" He covered my hurt hand with his free one and moved his other hand from my shoulder to the crook of my neck. I wondered if he could feel the heat radiating off of my reddened skin. Great, something else for me to have been conscience of. The silver-haired man put his chin on top of my head and walked closer to me, pretty much pinning me to the wall. It left me wondering how much closer he can get. I quickly glanced up then back down nervously. What the hell was going on? This wasn't exactly out of Hidan's character, but, then again, it was. It wasn't really out of his character to slap my ass, or pin me to a damn wall, but he was... well, being nice. And not super touchy feely. The world was about to explode, wasn't it? Or I'm dreaming, or something... I muttered silently after making a mental note: he actually had to bend down to put his head on mine- I was that short.

"Mina-chan?" He asked.

"Y-yes?" I wanted to face palm fifty times over and over again as I listened while my voice cracked squeakily.

"Did you not hear me? Are you alright?" Hidan questioned. I shivered as his fingers tickled my neck below my ear. "I'm fine, Hidan."

"Good... that's what you get for being a damn bitch and punching me," he said with a laugh. I slapped him and noted the really sharp sting in my hand as I quickly walked away. I took back what I had thought- ALL OF THAT WAS IN CHARACTER.

"Fuck you" I yelled as I walked into the common room, dodged the coffee table, and flopped on one of the two couches. "Selfish bastard..."

From the threshold of the doorway, if you looked to the right, you'll find the two couches, one of which I was obnoxiously and dramatically occupying. One faces forward, and the other was turned- directionally- hot dog rather than hamburger. A mahogany coffee table sat in the middle. Hidan usually mistreated the poor piece of furniture by using it as a foot rest, hence, there were many, many scuff marks decorating it. Aside, to the left, a decent-sized plasma screen t.v. hung upon the wall. A larger table matched the coffee table sat below it with game system after game system and a dvd-vcr combo.

If you lookrf to the far left corner, a pool table covered in quite a bit of dust took up space. I didn't see why we had it, none of us played pool anyway. I was surprised Kakuzu hadn't tried to sell it. The other corner harbored an amount of Tobi's random belongings and a bookshelf of Itachi Uchiha's books. All in all, it was a seemingly bland room. The lighting was rather dim to be normal. Despite those two facts, just about every organization member was usually always in there. With that have being said, just about everyone heard and saw my entrance. I can't say they weren't used to my outbursts, but they didn't know exactly when to expect them.

"Mina-chan?" I didn't look up, only left my face mushed in the cushioning of the couch. "Yes?"

"Umm... Sorry about earlier," I looked up to find Konan; she laid a hand on the side of the couch, "It's orders that if there's an intruder, none of us can help you or Hidan fend them off." Well, damn, you couldn't give me a break? I was ya'll's newest recruit for Jashin's sake.

I gave her a befuddled gaze, but then had an epiphany: whenever that shadow guy made an appearance, Konan and Tobi both just disappeared... It made since now! It was just kinda sad that I didn't notice it earlier thougt. I silently laughed at myself, but furrowed my eyebrows. "So Leader wants Hidan and I to die, basically?"

"Well, umm... he thinks you deserve to learn a lesson, not die... necessarily," she replied, "Tobi will probably end up apologizing also; he's been in his room ever since Leader got onto him about not helping you and all."

"Oh Tobi..." I muttered and looked downward, "Well, I understand. Thanks, Konan-chan." She nodded and walked out of my view; once she did so, I let my head fall limp and crash into the cushioning again. Really? Fuck my life, man. Leader had no decency. Hidan had no brain. Konan was waaay too faithful toward Leader. I knew I shouldn't've given Leader a shitty attitude. Well, how much more worse can this day get?

I turned my head to the side once I realized I couldn't breathe through a mushed nose. It grew immensely quiet. That was rather odd because, usually, Kisame watches t.v. (loudly, if I may have added), while Hidan and Kakuzu bickered over any and everything, Tobi was all over the place because he breathed sugar and caffeine, and Deidara blew random crap up in his room; but there was nothing really. Voices were heard from the nearby hallway along side footsteps echoing from what I thought is the kitchen. I heard repetitive popping and knew someone was heating the oven up. So there was life in this prison after all?

"Mina-chan, un!" I just about fainted, I was pretty sure. I was not expecting to be yelled at. I began to lift my head up to look backward, but just lie there when I felt something a bit heavy land on my butt. God, how had I asked for this? My ears perked at the "un" coming after my name, and I knew it was Deidara. I began to smile and opened my mouth to greet him, but he interrupted me. "Mina-chan, why're you sulking, un?"

"I-I am most certainly not sulking!" I muttered and lifted a foot to kick him. He caught it and held it to his side. I looked back, "So I'm being held hostage or something now?"

"Yes, you are. If you don't speak, you'll be forcing me to tickle you, un," he replied. I groaned. Deidara knew my weaknesses well. Why? I'm not really sure. How? I was stupid and naive and ended up telling him one way or another.

"You're making my butt go numb with your boniness, Deidara-kun," I said and tried to wiggle into a more comfortable position.

"I'm not bony, it's all muscle, un!" He knocked on his abdominal area with a proud expression, "If you wanted to see, I'd show you, but I'm sure you'd rather pass. You'd probably just go after Hidan and rip his cloak off, un." Deidara laughed with an evil snicker as I blushed and started to flail around helplessly.

"Yeah, right! He's a fucking prick! And you know what, Mr. Know-it-all? Just to prove my point, show me your fucking abs!" I yelled in a fluster.

"Whoa, Mina-chan, I was kidding about the Hidan thing," he replied. I whined then said, "Well, even if you were, know that that's what I was sulking about in the first place- Hidan being a selfish douche bag with no damn heart."

"So you admit to sulking, un?"

"N-no!" I retorted, "Let's get on with this though, since that's out of the way, alright?" Deidara released my foot and stood up beside me. His expression wasn't exactly readable, it looked like a mix of concern and humor, I just silently huffed; it was probably 'cause I was being more ridiculous than normal. I noticed Deidara looked like a miniature skyscraper from my stature. As I rolled over and sit up to face him, I couldn't help but stare up at his piercing, crystal blue eyes with a blush. What exactly did I have to get myself into this type of thing for? At least I wouldn't actually get in trouble with this predicament...The blonde stone-nin just smirked at me and placesd a hand at the hem of his shirt. "I wasn't expecting this to be your reaction, honestly, un."

"Umm, well..." I could comment on how muscles are a turn on, but I decided that conversation didn't fit the right way necessarily, "I guess I couldn't resist...?" What the hell... I'm turning into a genuine flirt around here. Maybe I really should just kill myself like I said earlier.

Deidara laughed at how I questioned myself in my own sentence and pulled his shirt up to his chest... which was a bit more than I expected to see at first, but, hell, I didn't mind after I saw what I did! My face turned beat red as I bit my lower lip and place a hand over my nose and mouth. A nosebleed was coming on... What do I do? What do I do? Jashin, help me! I never asked anything of you! I nervously lowered my head a bit and memorized the picture before me. He wasn't lying after all! He really did have a six pack... was I dreaming?

"Mina-chan, un?" He let his shirt fall to it's original place and held a hand out to me. His voice snapped me out of my thoughts and doubts. His hand lingered before me, and I grabbed it and stood in front of him, "Y-yes, Deidara-kun?"

"I really was kidding about what I said about you towards Hidan; he's an asshole- you know as well as myself- and I know you barely manage to put up with him, un," he replied and gaves me a slight smile, "Even if you did like him, I'd have to object because you can do so much better than that, un."

"Thanks... Umm, well, he's not a bad guy. Once you get passed his constant nagging. And cussing. And sacrifices. And pervertedness," I listed and quietly giggled uncertainly, "Just... nevermind."

"I get what you mean, don't freak, un," he grinned and patted my shoulder as he walks passed me, "I'm hungry... so I'll save you a seat at the table, 'right, un?"

Ab-solutely. I nodded simply yet happily as he moved around me, "See ya, Deidara-kun." Once more, he laughed, waving.

I listened as his footsteps fade out pace by pace until there's sheer silence. I didn't notice it earlier, but during this whole time, everyone had made their exit. I was thankful for that, but it was really ironic. Anyway, I supposed it was true that something new is learned every day. Today: 1) Hidan could be nice, but he ended up being a douchebag, and 2) Deidara, usually didn't lie. Well, not about his abs at least. I sighed aloud, gazed at the ceiling, and clasped my hands over my heart to feel it beating quickly. It was such an odd feeling. Who knew a boy's abs could do that much?

I heard footsteps once more and shifted my vision to the doorway.

"... That's unacceptable, Konan-chan." I didn't struggle to realize who's voice it was. Leader... I silently dashed to the couch by the wall and looked around with a panic. I was sure it was clear in my eyes as daylight...

Leader walked through the threshold nonchalantly with Konan behind him closely.

"B-but Negato-kun, this... this really isn't reasonable. If you wanted to have her in the organization, why're you willing to let her possibly die like this?" Konan questioned, "And Hidan! Hidan is one of your best recruits! He deserves better, though his maturity levels don't say so."

Who the hell was Negato? I winced in my uncomfortable position crammed between the couch and the wall. I had my right side along the wall and held my leg to my chest and let the other slide underneath the couch and had my head lowered out of Leader and Konan's sight. This was ridiculous, if I may've said so myself.

"Konan, shut up," he demanded. My eyes widen in disbelief. If I wasn't trying to keep secrecy at the moment, I would've slap the piercings out of his damn face. There was no way he could talk to Konan like that, especially since she was, like... his loyal servant. It grew quiet; I didn't really expect for her to object his wishes.

"This is stupid," she said quietly.

"Since when are you one to deceive my commands?" He asked.

I could hear the change in his voice; apparently, he was just as surprised as I was with Konan. I heard the girl mutter something under her breath, "You already know I'm opposed to you doing this. Don't act as if you're dumb. An organization consists of people who work together to accomplish a certain purpose, that's the logical definition; you're defying and defeating the point, and I think it's stupid, as I said before."

"First off, I never asked for you opinion, Konan; second, if you tell either of them, you will face consequences; third, it's their fault. Karma's a bitch," Leader replied.

"That's bullshit, it isn't karma, it's you being an asshole," Konan said in a matter-of-factual tone. More footsteps were heard, quick in pace, so I guessed Konan ran out of the room. Slow, sluggish ones follow, and there was silence.

* * *

I shifted in my seat and glance to Konan, then to the table. This had gone on for the passed five minutes. I was really tempted to ask Konan about it all- especially why she actually went against Leader or Negato- whoever it was. I could've swore it was Leader, but she called him Negato. I wonder if she'd be upset that I eavesdropped on them... I mean, I wasn't really planning on it, it was just, like, a reflex; as soon as I heard his voice, I panicked. It wasn't really my fault.

"Mina-chan? Are you alright, un?" Deidara's caught my ear. I looked to him a bit blankly. Would Deidara help me if I get attacked by the assassins? "I'm fine, Deidara-kun." I smiled charmingly and he returned it.

"I do need to ask you something though..." I said quietly. It's so loud in the dining room that no one else but Deidara and myself hear my words. The clanking of plates and cups covered our conversation; he leaned over a bit in his seat and waited.

"Umm, well, you know about the hired assassins, I'm guessing," I paused and he nodded, "Well, if I were attacked would you listen and follow Leader's orders or would you try to help me?"

He looked at me oddly then down to his hands. My heart throbbed in my throat. Was it really Hidan and I against the world? Sure, Deidara put up a decently nice front, but just because he flirted, definitely didn't mean anything. Ugh, Jashin.

* * *

So how'd you guys like it? Thanks to all my reviewers and fav-ers! You're all beautiful, and no one can change that! :)


	4. Watch Yo Mouf', Boy!

I'm back once more! And this time, as compared to last, I'm updating within a month! Within a week, really. So, yay.  
Call me butter, 'cause I'm on a roll! I love that joke. XD;  
Now enjoy, childrens! (edit: Jesus motherfucking Christ, I hate revising my shit...)

* * *

The air wafted around coldly in the kitchen. Hidan and Kakuzu were heard fight across the table from each other, Kisame talked to Itachi as Zetsu and Sasori shared silence. Tobi tied a part of his napkin to his fork and pretended that it was superman, and Konan and Leader... I couldn't tell if they were talking or not. Tension seemed apparent from my seat in the room. This wasn't a typical dinner at the dining table of the Akatsuk... It was proper to have an orderly dinner at a table with everyone present, according to Leader, but normally... things were a bit less scary. Said man kept proving his low mentality to us through simple things. Porcelain platters and cups clinked together and forks hit the bottoms of serving dishes and plates. The waves of laughter and chatter reminded me of the time I saw the ocean. I've only been once in my life, but it was certainly memorable. The cawing of seagulls and consistent breaking and crashing of the crests of the water was so relaxing, when I tried to remember what exactly it sounded like. Like now, it just blocked everything out and calmed all senses. Whenever I did see the body of water, the smell of salt was thick in

the air right along side of it...  
If I had a canvas and paint, I could recreate the whole picture in my mind. The infamous, clay bomber sat at my right side; he stared at the palms of his hands silently as he thought of a valid response to my previous questioning.

"Umm, well, you know about the hired assassin, I'm guessing," I pause and he nods, "Well, if I were attacked would you listen and follow Leader's orders or would you try to help me?"

The hands on his mouth seemed to wickedly smile back up at Deidara while he contemplated. His blonde hair almost glistened underneath the lighting, I noticed, and his eyes glowed with a strong piercing, yet unique fragility... how odd. It was intriguing.

"Minami-chan," he began. He used my whole name, so I decided he must've meant serious business. I listened for the tail-end of his sentence closely, "I don't want you to have doubts in me, but I honestly can't promise anything..."

I looked at the Stone-nin, a bit choked up; Deidara simply and blankly looked back at me. He did mean serious business, apparently. He wasn't kidding.

"I don't give a damn who it goes against, you're my comrade, and that is what matters, un, but I can't afford to lose my place here," he replied, "We've been pretty decent friends from the beginning when you were recruited though, so I'll try to help when I can, un."

An unsure, small smile crossed my face, but I hope he saw the hurt. "Thanks for your bluntness..."

"Hey, Mina-chan... I didn't mean that badly... Leader threatened something... really big, okay? But I will help, I swear, un," Deidara said. A hint of realization crawling through my spine and I shake my head. "As long as it's not just me and Hidan having to go against this all alone... he can be so ridiculous."

Deidara snickered, "No one can work with him, really, un." I watched shyly as he placed his plate of food down before him and looked up at me with a genuine smile. That was pretty rough, even if he tried to make it better. I didn't think anyone was willing to help me out. I mumble drandom nothings quietly while grabbing a roll of bread off of his plate, shoved it in my mouth, and continue from earlier on sulking-over-how-horrible-life-is spree. I could't help but make a face- the roll isn't very good. Deidara chuckled and started eating.

"You not gonna get a plate, un?" I looked forward to the serving dishes and foods. An immediate frown decorated my face. Fish? Nasty. For as long as I could remember, I had hated fish because, when I was smaller, I got food poisoning from it. I couldn't even think about it without wanting to gag. The smell was horridly putrid.

"Eww, no thanks. I despise fish," I muttered and pinched my nose closed. I didn't realize it was fish earlier and I wished I hadn't've. Now I was miserable and nervous to breathe because the smell of it made me nauseous. Deidara put his face in mine so I could see him roll his eyes obnoxiously. I jutted my lip out at him, then looked to the clean, white plate on the table below me and then to his. "I'll just stick to eating the... okay-stuff off of your plate, if you're all right with that... or I can take stuff off of-" I looked to my left to Itachi, "Itachi's plate... though I'm not sure if he'd be happy with that." Itachi merely glanced at me; I gave him a bright smile, and I turned shyly to Deidara once more.

"So I'll stick to you," I laughed lightly and took another roll off of Deidara's plate and nibbled on it. The flavor of the roll was bland. I could eat a rock, and it'd be more appetizing. Hell, the rock would be easier to eat, too!

"That's fine with me, I don't really mind; you aren't missing much anyway, the fish is disgusting, un," he muttered in dissatisfaction. I knew I wasn't missing much just because it was fish. Fish- for Jashin's sake- fish!

"Yeah," I began with a chuckle, "You can't re-"

"HEY! I fucking heard that, bastard!" Hidan bellowed from literally across the room. Hidan is at one end of the table while Deidara is at the other. You get the picture on how obnoxious the Jashinist sounds.

I deadpanned, "Is this fighting really necessary?"

"You need to know that you can't fucking cook, so you won't anymore, un," Deidara retorted a bit plainly.

"Fix your own damn food next time, fucker!" Hidan grumbled.

"If it's your food or mine, I'll be sure to make myself something, un," the blonde replied. I was honestly surprised Deidara didn't use the same tone of voice as Hidan, but I could't complain.

I watched as Hidan opened his mouth to go on another rant, but Kakuzu shoved a roll in his mouth quickly. I laughed and looked to Deidara, "I'm gonna fix myself a sandwich; want one?"

He nodded, "I'll go with you, I don't have anything better to do anyways, un." I smiled and stood from my seat with Deidara following. We walked into the next room over from the dining room to the kitchen and made ourselves simple peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Something simple was usually better than something complicated- like nasty fish. We took our places at the table once more and finished our food in good time.

"There are some matters that are worthy of discussing," Leader said. He sat at the head of the table proudly like he had a right. Coincidentally, I yawned very loudly and dramatically while stretching. Leader glared at me; I simply looked back. "Problem, sir?"

He looked away and it grew immensely quiet. "One of the squads will be facing a minor change, and another will need to adapt: I'm moving Minami out of Hidan and Kakuzu's squad into Sasori and Deidara's squad."

"Can Leader move, umm, Mina-me-chan, to-into Tobi and Zetsu-san's squad instead? Umm, please?" Tobi asked, sounding entirely like a cute, little kid. I smiled at Tobi from where I sat and giggled. I wouldn't really mind being in his squad; he kept me looking on the bright side of things whenever he was around. But I think... I would have rather beed in Deidara's squad. Why? Well, I had my reasons, may they be slightly sexual or not.

"No, Tobi," he growled, "Any objections?"

There is a pause and Tobi stood awkwardly.

"Except for Tobi." Tobi sat down sadly.

"Well fuck yeah, right here!" Hidan stood up quickly, "That's not damn fair that you're moving her out of my squad! She and I are being tracked by some assassin fuckers- we need to stick together!"

"I hate to do it... but I object, too," Kakuzu said quietly while sluggishly joining Hidan in standing position, "I recruited her, I think she should stay with us. I used my time on her, and time is money."

"Greedy bastard..." Hidan mumbled so only Kakuzu hears.

"Do you want her out of the squad? Shut up," the masked man commanded in a whisper.

"Sorry to say, but you two don't count, along side Tobi and Minami; but she's not against it anyway," Leader says.

"You're damn retarded, why're you gonna ask if anyone objects and once someone does, you say they don't count?" I asked rudely and loudly, "That's crap. And you said it's a discussion- a discussion includes everyone's opinions, and, last time I fucking checked, everyone's opinion counts."

"Well you-" Leader starts.

"And goddammit, I am against it, it won't matter with your bullshit attitude though," I continue.

"You're-"

"You're an ass," I cut in.

"Minami, you-"

"Now, I'm finished," I said and mentally died laughing.

"Thank you-"

"Go Mina-chan!" Hidan cheered, "Damn, she's on a roll! Did you hear all that, Kakuzu?" And with Hidan's simple question, consistent talking and yelling started up. For some reason, Tobi stood on the table proudly and performed odd stances. I figured he was talking to Zetsu about some t.v. show, but there was really no telling.

"Yes, I heard it, I'm standing right here, dumbfuck," Kakuzu muttered.

"Hey, you don't have to get all catty, bitch, I was just-"

"Will you all shut up?" Leader finally yelled. I rolled my eyes as it grew quiet once more.

"I am the leader of this organization, and what I say goes! Minami, you're in Deidara's squad- that's final!" He stared at me with a menacing expression, "Happy now, cunt?"

My jaw automatically dropped, my eyes widen, and a fire burned within me. I struggled to keep breathing calmly.

_What_ did he call me?

"What did you just call her, mother fucker?" Hidan took a step in Leader's direction... and another... "You're the cunt, you goddamn pussy! You need to shove your words up your tight asshole, you piece of shit! You have a problem, douche bag- you fucking fag?" With his streams of curses, he began getting more infuriated step by step; Kakuzu put him in a head lock and grabbed his arms so he couldn't throw any punches to make things worse, if that was possible.

"Kakuzu, get the fuck off me!"

"Hidan, you can't afford to do anything stupid right now," he replied. I walked around the end of the table over toward Kakuzu; Deidara got up and followed after me.

Hidan tried his damn hardest to get Kakuzu to let go, but it led to no avail; Kakuzu's hold on him was tight. I took a step over to Leader and Deidara held my arm loosely. I didn't look back to him, and without hesitation, slipped out of his hold, and threw a blind punch at Leader. It landed his cheek; I immediately slung my other arm, but he caught my fist, and squeezing it far too hard. Coincidentally, I fell to my knees.

"That's where you belong, bitch," he said with a smirk. I beat his leg with my free hand, but his grip grew tighter and tighter the more I tried to struggle. Leader's expression beared no change, excluding a sick smirk when he heard the joints pop sickly.

"Let her go!" Konan squeaked. He looked to Konan, to her pleading gaze and receded a bit. With a growl, he released my hand and punched me on the cheek, causing me to fall back onto my butt roughly. I scrunched into a small ball and held my face, fighting a huge urge to cry.

"You fucking motherfucker, I'll fucking kill you for that, you sorry bastard!" Hidan gave one last push forward and broke through the older man's grasp. Said Jashinist tripped over his feet nearby me. Kakuzu jumped on the man once more, and the most Hidan could do was flip the bird at Leader.

* * *

"Shit..." Hidan muttered angrily, "Shit, shit, shit..." The Jashinist ran a hand through his slick, gray hair and stomped childishly. The glistening, onyx black pendant around his neck clinked together and sounded like bells clashing against one another. It was a serene noise. Kakuzu watched Hidan throw a fit from his bed. "Hidan, stop."

"Why the fuck should I? That... that all happened because I was weaker than you and... and I couldn't get to him..." He reasoned. He let his head fall back as he scrutinized the ceiling, "It's... my fault she got hurt."

"It's not your fault, Hidan. Stop."

"Quit telling me to stop, I'm not going to! Get the fuck out if you want quiet!" He yelled in reply, annoyed. Kakuzu simply stared at him with silence, but started, "She's going to be fine, Hidan."

"No, she's not! He called her a cunt, and right after that, he fucking hit her in the face!" He dramatically said, eyes wide, "She's fragile!"

"Hidan, you cuss at her all the freaking time," the stitched man stated.

"No, I fucking don't!" He denied.

"You call her 'your bitch' all the time, just for example," Kakuzu retorted.

"Where the fuck do you come up with this shit? You're going off the deep end, old man, sorry to say," Hidan replied, "Even if I did, at least I've never fucking hit her!" Kakuzu shot him a glare with unique, piercing green eyes. He didn't bother to continue onward with the discussion but simply stood and walked out of the room.

I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror plainly. I never really noticed how much my hair had grown over the recent passed time; it touched maybe half way down my arm. Last I recalled, it simply reached and barely caressed the tops of my shoulders. As a child, I was used to people giving me odd looks because of the color- a deep red. If the light hit in the right way, my hair seemed to glow in a sense, like fire. My bangs hung vertically down my forehead and into my eyes a bit; my eyes were green like my mother's. They were oddly bright-looking. My skin was as pale as possible- I touched it realizing how diseased I was becoming to look. I'd come up with things to do at least: get a different haircut, tan, and buy clothes to accent the color of my eyes.

I looked down at my sore hand. It was currently wrapped in multiple layers of thick bandage. Sasori said that there was nothing really wrong, but I told him to wrap it anyways because I'm a drama queen, a klutz, and because the fact it was hurting. The puppeteer also said my cheek was fine, though there was alot of bruising. I guess I was set. I sighed and walked out of the bathroom.

"I'm all bandaged up now!" I declared, "I look like a mummy." I held my hand up to prove so. Hidan turned a bit and looked at me plainly.

"Uhh... you alright there, Hidan?" I asked. The immortal sat on his bed, propping his frowning face atop his hand.

"Come here," he said quietly. I did so, shyly glancing around. He gingerly grabbed my hand and looked at it.

"There's not alot in the world that makes me sad, Mina-chan," Hidan stated quietly. That was all he said. I sighed and shook my head, "I hope you aren't implying you're sad over this mess. The only person at fault here is me, and you should know that."

"Don't fucking say that, you hear me?" Hidan stood up again and glared at me. He held my chin with an intense air about him. "All the fuck you did was stand up for yourself when some tried belittling you, you tell me how the hell that's supposed to be wrong." There was a small silence.

"You can't tell me it's wrong, what you did, so it's not your fault. Don't try it," he added. I looked at him sadly through the bangs hanging over my eyes. I felt a bit ashamed, seeing as how he was scolding me and all.

"I'm not saying that Leader got off, he sure as hell takes most of the blame, but... I could've stopped all of this. And don't fucking point out that I'm 'going soft' or some shit- this matters to me, okay?" Wait, mattered to him? Seriously? He was going soft after all… I blushed thinking of that. He cared?

"You're blushing, Mina-chan," Hidan observed. I slapped his arm and turned around with crossed arms. "Thanks for that, captian obvious!" Hidan laughed cutely and I peeked over my shoulders at him. He raised his eyebrows, "You done yet?" I considered saying no and walking out of the room, but for once, I'd rather have not messed it up with Hidan while he was being sweet. I simply shrugged, still avoiding his gaze.

"Well… that's what I wanted to tell you," he mumbled, scratching his head. I pushed him back onto the bed and leaned over him, pulling his Jashinist pendant toward me. "It still wasn't your fault in the least. Nor mine. I won't let you think otherwise."

Hidan's eyes widened in surprised and he lightly grabbed my hand. Suddenly the door opened; I stood up quickly and made sure I looked uniform. Kakuzu walked in, grabbed a paper, then left. I huffed and started toward the door.

"You gonna tell me bye, bitch?" He called. I smirked to myself before turning and tackling him on the bed, sitting in his lap. He held onto me to assure I wouldn't fall. I stared at him for a moment then simply said: "You should be sweet more often. It makes me horny, because then I have rights to knock you around." His brow stitched together in embarrassment, and he yelled, "I'm not being nice! It's only because you're hurt! But… you can knock me around any time you'd like…" Hidan winked and I giggled, biting my lip. I grabbed his hand and pulled him with me out of the room.

"Where are we going?" Hidan asked. I thought for a moment, "To play video games."

_Tch, tch, tch, tch..._

"... worries me. He's neither acting like himself, nor thinking logically. He's the type of person to actually use common sense to his advantage."

"Wait, wait, Hidan, listen," I whispered. The two of us stood around the bend of the hall, listening silently to the conversation taking place down the hall.

"Konan-chan, it's alright. Maybe he's stressed, just give him some time." That voice belonged to our very own Uchiha, Itachi. I had no clue he talked to Konan...

"I really hope your right, Itachi-kun," she said. It sounded like she released a huff, "I'm worried for Minami-chan and Hidan more so than I am for Leader though- Mina-chan in particular; and I'm unsure of what to do."

"I can't say for sure that I know how to help, honestly," he muttered, "I'm also afraid for her; she seems rather naive." I was most certainly NOT naive!

"She isn't, she's just... well, fickle with her decisions," Konan replied, "It doesn't help that it seems he's trying to have her sniffed out and killed."

"What if he is?" The raven asked monotonously.

"What... did you say?" Her voice was laced thick with disbelief, "No-" she gave a mocking laugh, "Th-that's impossible, I mean, obviously, that isn't true."

"As obvious as your case of denial?" Itachi asked blandly. That was a damn good comeback, I just had to say.

"You claim his behavior is odd towards her; he injured her and insulted her provokingly tonight; he... really dumps the blame on her for everything, from what I've heard- is it all not worth considering?" He questioned. The tension was so thick, you could cut it with a dull, butter knife.

_"It may well be worth it..."_

A soft creaking signified the opening of a nearby door, and the repeating of the noise was a signal of physical closure... Muffled voices kept consistent frequency. I looked around the corner, up and down the dark hall. Silence grew and evened out the ripples of any noise once piercing the dim veil. I looked up at Hidan as he peeked around the corner and to me.

"What a day," I muttered.

The next morning seemed groggy. As soon as I woke up, I found my digital clock reading ten thirty, and decided it was time to get out of bed, and start a better day than the last. If you had the right attitude, anything was possible. I kicked the sheets off of my legs and performed a stretch-and-yawn combo all at once, continuing to take a shower, brush my teeth- following through with all the other daily-hygiene chores.

Yesterday was like a blur. A very long, interesting blur. And last night... when Hidan held me to him like that, and the way he talked to me- he really made me feel human. He made me feel appreciated and, best of all, protected. After we kinda spied on Konan and Itachi, he said that I should be off to bed; I didn't complain too much."  
What a perfect way to end the night... I wondered if he could tell that I get nervous around him- other than all the stupid blushiness!

I walked out of the bathroom to my dresser and dressed in simple attire. Pants, a black v-cut shirt with fishnet around the collar and at the ends of the sleeves and I slipped on my zori. I thought I could go without leg warmers- at least until I actually had to wear them for a mission. I grimaced at the ugly cloak hanging in my closet. Boy, did I hate that hunk of fabric. With my sneer to the jacket, I laughed at myself and walked out the door, shutting it behind me. The hallways appeared as dim as ever. I could hear multiple voices, so that indicated today certainly wouldn't be like the last- lonely... and quiet... and a bit awkward. I smiled; today was going to be good, or so help me, God, I'd smite the whole Akatsuki. And I'd be sure to smite Leader twice for the hell of it.

I turned a corner and stopped to peer in the kitchen. Okay, no one was in here other than Zetsu- so apparently, everyone was skipping or had already had breakfast. Zetsu spotted me and I blinked blankly with a small smile. "G'mornin', Zetsu-san!"

"Good morning, Minami-chan. **Go away,**" I blinked a couple times more before sighing and disappearing from the threshold. My green orbs scanned the hall for any sign of life, but I saw none until I make a turn into the living room. Of course, the living room. I saw Hidan and Kakuzu sitting on one of the couches by one another; they were actually not fighting- something must've had happened... Kisame and Itachi were, for once, making use of our lonely pool table; whoever was playing solids sucked majorly.

I watched as Kisame sank the yellow, striped, nine ball. That was match.

"Booyah! I found something I can beat you at Itachi-san!" He chimed happily. I certainly couldn't blame him; Itachi seemed to be one of those guys that was perfect and beyond it. The raven's facial expression is unchanging.

"Rematch," Itachi grumbled. Kisame shook with roaring laughter. Men. My gaze left them and rested on the empty couch by Hidan and Kakuzu. Well... I could take the empty couch or share with them...

"Hey guys!" I said happily. I bounded over to them and stole a spot between the Jashinist and masked man. I couldn't help but chuckle as they both looked at me with nearly identical expressions.

"Morning, Mina-chan," Kakuzu replied a bit late. I showed him a huge grin, and poked his leg repeatedly just to annoy him.

"Did you hear about Itachi's idea?" Kakuzu asked, ignoring me. The only words that register are 'Itachi's idea'. I squeaked and look to the immortal quickly, acting like I didn't know anything. And I probably didn't because what I heard Itachi say was more of a proposition than an idea. "Umm, no... What're you talking about?" Hidan smiled but pretended it was toward the current t.v. show.

"Kakuzu told me about it earlier- I wanna explain it! Itachi has an idea... a strategy, per-say, that has to do with the assassin fuckers and that douche bag, Leader," he replied. My interest were automatically sparked.

What had the intellect Uchiha come up with now?

* * *

(edit: this chapter was my attempt to fix the… broken plot going on later in the story. Bear with me ;-;)

Yaaay~!  
I really hope you enjoyed it, it was fun to write.  
This chapter probably went by slowly, but it's decently important; the next will be tons better, you have my word. We're getting to the- I guess- more interesting parts anyhow.  
Thanks for reading! Reviews are greatly appreciated, along side constructive criticism, etc.


	5. How to Think Figuratively

Hey everyone! I'm back with chapter fiveee! I'm still on a rolllll, guys!  
Anyway, let's get to the good stuff, shall we?  
Remember, italics are flashbacks!*

Enjoy this chapter, pleeease!

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"S-so... you're being serious, right?" I asked, "Just making sure. And if you're kidding, I'm gonna beat the living daylights out of you." Yes, that was a threat, and I meant it because Hidan was immortal anyway.

"Why the fuck would I lie to you about this, Mina-chan?" Hidan answered my question with a question. He raised his furrowed eyebrows and his beautiful, detailed, lavender colored orbs scanned my face for some sort of response; he found nothing, and I could tell because he huffed and looked to the t.v. I simply shook my head, and I knew he saw it. My head shake translated into: I don't know, Hidan. It was true he didn't really have point in lying about this type of thing, especially since it pretty much depended on our lives. He turned his head to me slowly with a cute, little smirk. "And I've made my point."

I stuck my tongue out at him childishly and he laughed, looking away to somewhere else in the room- probably the t.v. again. They were watching the channel b.e.t.; music video currently plagued the speakers.

"Look, that's gonna be Hidan in a few years," Kakuzu said, pointing out the current music video. I laughed and listened to the lyrics of the song "'Dat Baby Don't Look Like Me."

"You goddamn motherfucker, yeah, right!" Hidan yelled in a fluster. It suddenly grew awkwardly quiet. Anyways...

"So it's all a matter of time?" I questioned; it sounded like a question, but it was really more of a statement.

Hidan nodded his head agreeably and Kakuzu, below his breath, released a pessimistic statement, but, nevertheless agreed also. I looked around, bored, and caught myself off guard as my stomach let out a long, loud growl. Blood rushed to my cheeks as Hidan glared at me with wide eyes, "Daaamn, Mina-chan, you haven't eaten this morning, have you?" I simply shook my head and held my tummy. "I woke up just before I came in here and Zetsu was in the kitchen. He scares me a bit..." Why wouldn't he? Zetsu is a cannibalistic plant, for crying out loud. That_ should_ be scary.

The Jashinist gave a rumbling laugh that could shake the couch. Kakuzu and I exchanged glances and sighed at his attitude- even this early in the morning?

"Well, I haven't either. Let's go, Mina-chan," he stated while standing and holding a hand out for me to grab. I observed his hand studiously and cautiously grabbed it. As soon as doing so, he pulled me to my feet and dragged me out of the room.

Hidan rounded the corner and stumbled in the direction of the kitchen. I stood there for a moment, forboding Hidan's cooking. He laughed at me, alrady knowing what I was thinking.

"Was it really that bad?" He asked in disbelief.

"I hate fish, so I'unno about that part but the rolls were as hard as rocks!" I said, disgruntled. Hidan had actually had a non-annoying attitude this morning; hopefully, he could keep it up without hurting himself. He was... really, acting like a human being lately. I walked over to the fridge and stared into it for a while. Hidan sat at the table, just talking and talking about something I didn't even bother to hear. I was feeling very uncreative, so I settled for boiling a bowl of rice. "Sorry this isn't anything great. I really just want to eat," I sulked.

_"He has an idea... a strategy, per say, that has to do with the assassin fuckers and that douche bag, Leader," he replied. My interest was automatically sparked. I raised an eyebrow. "Alright and it consists of... what?" I questioned, urging him to continue_.

I got some apple juice for myself and him, not really bothering to ask if he liked it.

_Hidan looked to the ceiling, "Well, he brought some shit up about how Leader could be trying to kill you, rather than protect you, like the fucker should since you're in his godforsaken organization... he talked about how Konan says she thinks Leader is acting weird- blah, blah, blaaah, you get the picture, so-"_  
_"Just let me explain, Hidan," Kakuzu cut in. For a moment, I had actually forgotten Kakuzu was there. That was what he got for being so damn quiet!_

I take a huge bite of rice and chug some juice, producing a sigh of satifaction. "Oh, that was good."

_"Fine, asshole, since you think you can do it 'better,'" Hidan growled in response. Kakuzu rolled his eyes and watched to me gingerly, whispering, "Itachi says Konan claims Leader is acting odd lately, which is certainly something I agree with, so we're all supposed to keep an eye out whenever he's around, and compare findings. We believe that Leader may be a possible impostor,."_

_"AN IMPOS-" I began to yell in shock; Kakuzu slapped a hand over my mouth. I felt all eyes lock in on me and I blushed in embarrassment. Typical me..._

_"Yes, Mina-chan, now keep quiet, if you will," he replied with a murderous tone. Hidan and I sweatdrop, "N-no problem, Kakuzu-sama..."_

Breakfast was better than I thought of it being. The mental image I had was of some type of animal cooked to a char in a platter while still twitching. It took pure skill to cook breakfast, and, naturally, the food was either amazing, or it sucks. Coincidentally and typically, this time, it was alright. No one in this damn hideout could cook; so figuratively, the food was always horrid.

_"As I was saying... We aren't for sure if that's true, Itachi just threw it out there for consideration. Considering the fact he's acted like... well, a total jackass toward you mentally and physically, I think there's a good chance Itachi is correct. I had suspicions before also, but it was just a stupid speculation at first. We can't assume the situation, so be careful, alright?" I nodded to signify I knew what he was talking about._

"We need to hire a fucking chef, this shit is ridiculous," I commented, in all, unsatisfied. The immortal bellowed with laughter. Hidan loved when I swore- he got the biggest kick out of it because he thought I used profanity with a weird tone of voice. That apparently made everything all the more amusing.

_"Well... that's all he really said. Just be on your toes, and always keep a buddy with you in case he tries to pull something," Kakuzu finished._

_"Okiedokie! Thanks for the information," I paused for a moment and deadpaned, "WAIT. When and where the hell did everyone talk about this if everyone knows about it?"_

_"Itachi caught everyone in the hall late at night and told them. He said he couldn't find you, or Hidan for that matter, so he told me to pass the word along," Kakuzu replied._

_I facepalmed repeatedly. So it wasn't just Itachi that told Konan only, it was that Itachi told everyone including Konan. And since I was out having a flirt fest, I missed out. _

_Goddamn, I tried to talk with my 'crush,' and I missed out on absolutely everything._

* * *

The dim lighting made me feel uneasy. I looked around the office nervously and scooted closer to Hidan for at least a speck of comfort. This was really intimidating. The floors creaked as Leader turned in his spinny chair to face myself and my immortal friend.

"Hidan," he looked to Hidan, "... Mina," he looked to me. I stood unphased and simply stared at him. He looked to my side and laughed once seeing my bandaged hand and patched face. Displeased, I placed my hands on my hips. "The fuck do you need? If you only want to laugh at me, you can do that when I'm not here, asshole."  
"Why'd you bring Hidan with you?" He ignored my question. Well, why not? I thought it's easily official that my life sucked. Right after breakfast, Leader summoned me to his office... and since Hidan was by me, I asked him to go along. Of course, he willingly joined.

"Why in heathen hell do you even give a flying fuck about who Mina-chan hangs out with? Can you get a move on with your bullshit so we can use our lives productively?" Hidan retorted for me. I took a deep breath and gulped. I was glad I could count on Hidan to spew profanity at my enemies.

"Mina, you have a mission with your accomplices, Sasori and Deidara," I looked at him oddly as he emphasized on Deidara's name with a grin. Hidan released a growl; he did say he was upset he couldn't keep me in his squad... I guess he wasn't lying.

"Shove it up your ass, douche bag," Hidan mumbled.

"Hidan... we want him to talk," I said to him quietly. I heard him mutter something along the lines of "like hell we do." I jumped at the sound of a knock on the door and looked back to the threshold as Deidara and Sasori enter.

"Speak of the spawn of Satan," Hidan mumbled under his breath. He crossed his arms and drilled holes into Leader's frame with his glare. Deidara walked over to me and stood at my side with Sasori at his.

"Good timing, gentlemen," Leader said, "Hidan, if you will, take your leave."

"Actually, I won't, sorry to bust your fucking bubble. Any damn thing you can say to Mina-chan alone is surely something you can say to her when I'm around, right?" Hidan asked with a sinister tone. Leader threw him a glare and turnew away to Sasori in particular. "Sasori, you're squad has a simple mission. Assassinate a man that has unreturned favors given by the Akatsuki. Location is a village on the Northern outskirts of the Leaf Country," Leader explained.

I couldn't help but feel faint. Was he really going so low as to send me there? What a sick fuck. Surely not.. My breathing hitched as he proclaimed, "Mina can easily show you the way there." He laughed in amusement while I stared in utter horror at the floor.

"You have two days," he finished, "Dismissed."

I quickly turned around, and high-tailed it to the door. Okay, so this morning I said today would be good; I stood corrected, so I corrected myself: today was shit and nothing more. Fuckity, fuck, fuck.

"Mina-chan?" I looked to Hidan to find him doing the same toward me, "What the hell did he mean by that?" I sighed very unhappily. I crossed my arms and glanced between the three males. Deidara and Hidan, oddly enough, had the same expressions, while Sasori simply waited. "That's my... umm, that's my home he was... talking about..." I muttered complaints under my breath with anger.

"I remember that place! Man, it's fucked like no other," Hidan commented, "Are you gonna be alright? You don't have to go, Minami-chan." The pronunciation of my whole name caught my full attention and reminded me that it was true. I could go and just let Sasori and Deidara do the work themselves... That was actually a decent idea, now that I thought about it.

"No, Hidan, it's alright," I replied with a smile. He nodded and turned away with a curt grunt. Deidara, Sasori, and I watched the masochist walk down the hall.

"We're leaving in an hour, promptly; get your stuff together and be at the door- no sooner no later," Sasori said and walked in the same direction as had Hidan disappeared in.

It was quiet. Deidara peered down at me in my small stature as I glared after the males into the darkness.

"Mina-chan, un?" He called. I bit my lip; I never told him how crappy my village was, or anyone else for that matter. I hated to think about it at all, talking about it was worse, figuratively. Hidan and Kakuzu only knew how shitty it was because whenever they recruited me, they had to visit the village themselves.

I took a step foward to pass Deidara, and he watched closely. The blonde lightly pulled my arm toward him, and me being my clutzy self, I lost my balance and release a high pitched squeak. Deidara barely caught my arm, hosting a surprised face.

"I understand why you're upset; I feel the same way toward my village, un... You don't have to go, I'll talk to Danna about it-"

"I'm going, Deidara-kun," I interrupted, "Thank you though." I smiled at him and lightly punched him in the arm. He nodded and did the same, "Well, better now than later; since we'll be getting done with this mission quickly, so you'll be happy you got it over with afterwards, un."

"That's... That's true..." I grinned, having not realized this till Deidara brought it to my attention. With him and Danna, we really would get it out of the way in no time! "I'm gonna get my stuff together and I'll meet you at the door, 'kay?"

Deidara gave me a smirk; it's like his own type, "'Kay, un." I'm sorry, but... it made me feel like he cared.

A smile graced my lips. Hopefully, things'd go well.

* * *

I walked to my closet and grabbed an outfit off of the hangers in it and put them in my bag; I very unhappily got my cloak and threw it on along with my leg warmers. I detested the required uniform- I didn't mind the purple nail polish much though! I looked in my bathroom mirror at myself as I tied my hitai-ate around my neck. The metal beared a Konohagakure symbol in the center with one single, thick slash running along it horizontally. I made a quirky face, fixed my hair, and turned out the bathroom light.

"Okay, so I have: a change of clothes- check; scrolls and weapons- check; map- check... Alright! I'm all set!" I exclaimed. I zipped my small backpack up, put it on, and started toward the door, walking out.

"Wait!" I charged back in my room hurriedly, open the bottom drawer of my dresser and pull all the clothes away to expose the inside of it. I took two of my most favorite manga novels- one being of hentai- hentai, hentai, and... more hentai...- the other of the typical, school-girl loving yaoi- and put them in my bag also, and then I decided I was ready. I stood in the threshold of my door and scanned over my empty room. Everything was as it should be. I switched the lights off. "Bye, home." I locked the door and shut it, turned away, and headed to Hidan and Kakuzu's room to fetch after the Jashinist.

I hated living in a fucking cave. It was always so dark in the rooms, and the floors had random bumps in them. Figured a fag like Leader would choose this type of place. I supposed I couldn't complain too much; there were plenty things present for entertainment... it still sucked though. I rounded a corner and knocked on the door lightly before peeping in. Well, score, Hidan and Kakuzu both! I'd get to say bye to both of 'em before I left on my second mission. Without them. And their arguing. Without them. And no sexual harassment. Without them.

"Hi, guys~!" I chimed happily. I had to say, I'd miss them. Even though Hidan could be an obvious pain in the ass.

"Hey, Minami-chan," Hidan replied. He sat up from his laying position on the bed and stretched with a yawn.

"Hey, Mina-chan," Kakuzu added his greeting blandly. Like always, he was sitting at his desk scanning through papers and writing certain things down- oh, the life of a bounty hunter...

"We're about to leave, so I figured I'd tell you two bye," I replied. Kakuzu looked up at me and Hidan walked over.

"Aren't you the considerate one?" Kakuzu mused in total sarcasm. I stuck my tongue out at him and held my hips. "Well, I like to think that I am, thank you." He gave a scoff and rolled his eyes jokingly. At least, I thought he was joking.

"Mina-chan!" Hidan slipped his arm around my waist. My face reddened as I looked up to him.

"Even though I only had one mission with you, I'll miss you and your uptight, yet oddly sexy, ass." I slapped Hidan and walked away. I knew it'd only be a matter of time before his perverseness would reappear.

"And your damn fine curves," he said following after me, "Without you, I'll only be able to look at that heathen, Kakuzu. It won't be any fun not being able to piss you off anymore..."

"Hidan!" I yelled. What the HELL was his problem? "I'm taking my leave now, goodbye, Kakuzu-sama; I feel sorry you have to put up with this fuck of a partner."

"Trust me, I am, too..." Kakuzu sighed in disappointment with the Jashinist, "Bye, Mina-chan, good luck. Be careful out there."

The masked man turned to his paper work once more and continued with whatever task he had started. I glared at Hidan with clear frustration and left the room; he followed suit and grabbed my wrist whenever we were in the hall.

"Don't touch me..." I said in annoyance.

Hidan laughed lowly, "You haven't caught on that I only do that to piss Kakuzu off? I mean, hell, yeah, you're one heck of a looker, but I only say that perverted shit because the old man hates it." I just responded with another glare- a miserable, unhappy glare. I avoided his gaze desperately. Okay, I thought back on it, and everytime he'd tried to pull crap like that, it was when Kakuzu was around... wait, what about last ti-

"And about last time, you apparently took that the wrong way because I was kidding," he muttered and scratches the back of his head. I hung my head, "Stop with your shit attitude altogether."

He put a hand on the back of my neck and pulled me toward him. His free hand slipped around my shoulders, "Any way to make it up to ya?" I could tell he jokingly asked that, but I had a serious answer. "Hmm... while I'm gone, learn how to cook," he laughed as I wink at him. The Jashinist nodded and placed his chin atop my head.

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That's chapter five. :D Eight reviews so far~!  
Everytime I start a new chapter, I'm, like, "THU ASSASSINS ARE GONNUH MAKE THEIR APPEARANCEZ." But... it never happens at the end, and I'm all wtf-like 'cause they play a major role. I feel like crap 'cause it feels like I'm stalling or something, lawl. I don't mean to, it's just that I've... well, really just been making up a good majority of the story as I go... but I have the main ideas; and whenever I sit down to type it out, I expand too much on the small crap, so it makes my chapters uber long...  
Don't give up on me!  
Thanks for reading, reviews are majorly appreciated! Chapter six should be up soon!


	6. Learning How to Deal with Insanity

Hey, guys. :D I just wanted to say that you're all awesome. Eleven reviews? YEAH. Beautiful. Thanks a bunch!

By the way. I just wanted to point out the honorific situation. You may be all "WTF? Why does everyone call Mina 'Mina-chan,' and she only uses other honorifics for Sasori and Deidara? If there's no use of honorific by one person, from what I understand, it implies that they are close to one another or disrespect is shown, and Mina likes to feel close to everyone. I'm no native Japanese, so don't take my words to heart please...

So, let's get on with the show!  
Enjoy!

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"God, I thought you two would never be ready; It's freaking four o' clock already, we were scheduled to leave an hour ago..." came the mutter from a very irritated Sasori. Our very own infamous puppeteer glowered unhappily, displeased with my cohort and me. Deidara and I looked to one another and sweatdrop. I bowed slightly, then erected myself once more with decently good posture. "I'm sorry, Danna; I can promise you we won't keep you waiting anymore, right, Deidara-kun?"

It grew eerily quiet; I could feel Sasori's deathly, impatient glare along side Deidara's bubbly, distracted gaze. I coughed loudly, gunninging the blonde an unpleasant look as he admired he clouds in the sky over head. He didn't notice.

"Deidara-kun!" I half-whisper, half-yelled.

The blonde was instantly ripped from his thoughts; he visibly panicked and scanned through his cute little head for something to say. "Oh! Shit, un..." He trailed off and laughed sheepishly, "I-I'm on it, Sasori-danna, un!" Deidara began making a small clay bird with much haste and pink dusted across his embarrassed cheeks. A puff of smoke enveloped our surroundings, and a large bird loomed above us in stature. Of course, this was our demeanor of transportation! Sasori let out a long, heavy sigh of agony as he boarded the bird. He, apparently, wasn't looking forward to this mission. Hell, he was about as ecstatic as I was. Deidara and I followed suit, and the bird took flight, soaring through the cloudy skies. Sasori sat at the head of the bird away from the Stone-nin and myself; well, I didn't mind if he sat that far away if he was gonna be a sour puss. Seriously, was he sulking? I stole a spot near the tail, and peaked over the edge; I fucking hated heights, but it was a pretty view, so I dealt anyway. Deidara blatantly plopped down beside me and sighed; unlike the puppet's, Deidara's sigh was of contentment, from what I gathered. His facial expression seemed to support the idea.

I looked to him with curiousity and it registered. A smooth smirk thinned over his lips- his signature smirk. "Hmm? Oh, I just think this is gonna be fun, un." I mocked the appearance of confusion, and squeaked, "Umm... How so, Deidara-kun?" I could tell he had more to say, but he simply shrugged with a laid-back gaze to the firmament above. A simple smile graced my lips. Ah, Deidara-kun... The blonde laid down with his hands behind his head as pillows and closed his eyes. I couldn't blame him; Danna had earlier said that it'd take a day to just make it to Konohagakure. I wasn't exactly happy about that. Danna also explained to us that he wouldn't allow Deidara and I to take forever doing things. He told us to be well rested because he'd be pissed if we have to stop at a... well, it would've been better to just quote him. Note, he was NOT happy while talking of this- in fact, it was right before we left.

"Goddamnit! I swear-"

_"NOT 'GOD'!" Hidan interrupted randomly. Sasori turns to the the grey-haired male, eye twitching, then to us._

_"JASHINDAMNIT, I SWEAR THAT IF WE HAVE TO STOP ONE FUCKING TIME ON THE WAY THERE, I WILL NOT HESITATE TO CASTRATE YOU, BRAT."_

_Deidara and I stared at him in surprise. I raised a hand and opened my mouth to protest that I had nothing to castrate, but he answered for me quickly, "I wasn't referring to you, brat. Just the blonde one." Well, excuse me, jerk._

_"So you're saying that if I get tired and ask to stop somewhere you're going to castrate me? Fuck that shit, un!" Deidara complained, "That's not even fair, un!"_

_"All I'm asking for is that we don't have to stop on the damn way to Konoha. That means you should simply take a fucking nap on the way there, brat."_

Yeah, it wasn't pretty, as one could tell...

"Deidara-kun?" I questioned. He opened an eye, "Yes, un?"

"Can I... umm, well, would you let me play with your hair?" I ask. I can tell he wasn't anticipating that question. Hell, who was? I gave him a quirky smile and crossed my legs.

"Sure, un," he sputtered. I patted the side of my leg and he scooted over, lightly laying his head on the spot I pointed out. He bended his legs and intertwined his fingers to drop his hands onto his tummy. I giggled and began twirling and braiding different pieces of hair in his ponytail. I twisted a piece around my finger and looked to him. He simply watched me with interest as I did so.

It grew quiet as the chilly wind blows furiously. It seemed to whistle, oddly enough. I felt a shiver run down my spine and my body shook, following. He chuckled, "You're cold, un?" I nodded and smiled sheepishly. The glistening in his blue eyes showed he had an idea up his sleeve. Hopefully it wasn't going to be anything I was against... The blonde sat up in criss-cross-apple-sauce postition. I watched blankly. "Well, come here, Mina-chan, un," he said and laughed. I scooted a bit closer and watched as he unbuttoned his cloak with ease. Umm...?

"No, silly, un..." He whispered. Deidara grabbed my arms and pulled me forward, almost causing me to fall on top of him. How awkward was he planning on making this? I stumbled toward him, and gasp as he literally picked me up to set me in his lap. I must have looked funny considering my eyes were as big around as saucers and I was as stiff as a stick. Oh, and not to mention that fact that I was as red as a traffic light. I heard and feel his frame shake with chuckle- I lightly moved with his own frame in synchronism. He buttoned the lower half of his cloak once more.

"Better, un?" He asked. I simply blinked uncomfortably and stared up at him. I was NOT expecting this! This was... this was scandalous! This was something Hidan made me do! What had gotten into his little, blonde head? _What the flying fuck?_

...

Well... maybe it was helping a little considering the fact it was all warm and cozy in there... He wrapped his arms around me protectively and traced my spine and curved over to my waist. He repeated this action deliberately and languidly. I felt my throat go dry and my stomach flipped. Yep, that was certainly better.

"Umm... y-yeah," I stuttered and gave a laugh at myself, "It just… feels weird, y'know?"; I was sure he could easily tell that I was on the verge of fainting... I laid my head on his shoulder, and unsurely smiled. The difference with when Hidan had made me do this, it was only to piss Kakuzu off... Now, Deidara was doing this because he wanted to. The thing was: it felt better whenever Hidan was forcing me into it while cracking senseless, perverted jokes- now, I was… in the lap of a stranger…

What a weird predicament. The Stone-nin put his head upon mine for some sort of aegis and lowly suspired. Maladroitly, I put a hand on his chest nearby my face and let the other scramble to find one of his hands by my waist. Not wanting him to let me go, I simply held on to a couple of his fingers.

_"Mina, this is wrong. Mina, listen- this is wrong! It feels weird, so what the hell are you doing?" _I mentally yelled at myself over and over and over. "_I'm telling you: you'll regret this! You don't like Deidara, you idiot!"_

"Are you okay, Mina-chan, un?" He haphazardly questioned. He removed his head from mine to peek a look at me. I blushed and nodded. "Of course! Why wouldn't I be, Deidara-kun?" He embraced me a bit more tightly and smiled, "You're shaking; are you that cold, un?"

I shook my head clamorously and gawked up at him. "I'm not really that cold right now... I'm just, well... I'unno."

"You're nervous then, un?" He questioned. I didn't give him a riposte, but simply glimmed to the sky away from his guise, "Umm..." He chuckled a bit, giving me his signature smile, and resumed, also giving me yet another hug. I simply lit up the sky like a Christmas light and continued holding his fingers as if they were my lifeline.

* * *

"DANNAAA~!" I yelled loudly. Deidara and I snickered as he finished my sentence, "I'M HUNGRY, UN!"

"AND I NEED A POTTY BREAK!" I squeaked.

"CAN WE STOP AT A HOTEL, UN?"

"ARE WE THERE YET?"

"NOW, UN?"

"HOW 'BOUT NOW?"

Deidara and I continued until our words seemed to run together. No, Deidara wasn't really hungry or tired; and I didn't really have to pee either- well, maybe I kinda did, but that wasn't the point. Deidara and I stared at Sasori-danna with wide, glistening eyes. He hadn't said a word since we left, and that'd easily been hours. It was at least eight or nine now and we had left at four. It grew quiet once more, and the chance that Sasori was ignoring us was high, as always. I sighed and looked past the puppet. The sky was in full afterglow; the cosmos seemed to shine to their highest potential, then waver like a kindling flame- the empyrean vault of stars and planets and galaxies appeared unending from our positioning in the sky.

"It's beautiful, huh, un?" The blonde questioned. I nodded and lie my head on his shoulder once more. I shifted in my spot in Deidara's lap; I hadn't moved from my spot. I told him to tell me to get off whenever his legs started going numb though. I was considerate, but I wasn't passing this opportunity up either.

"Let's stop at the next town," Sasori said faintly. I blinked dumbly, "We were kidding, Danna."

"I know, Mina-chan. Stop the bird, brat," he commanded. Deidara oscillated and did as told. Once on the ground again, I couldn't help but have an odd appreciation to gravity for once. Gravity held me to the floor, and, damnit, I was glad! I brushed my cloak down neatly and Deidara refastened his. Sasori began walking ahead of us, and we followed. Along the thick, lush green brush of a forest and over a decently large bridge above a river we went. The darkness surrounded us and seemed to pull our shadows into its grasp hungrily and greedily. I simply stayed close behind Deidara; there was no use in getting paranoid over a little forest at nighttime.

"Here we are," I heard Sasori state. I ran into a still Deidara and he apologized while throwing an arm around my waist. I blushed and did the same to him. Sasori stood at his other side- the two of them just gazed forward.

"Geez, what're you guys looking... at?" I trailed off naively. It was absolutely breath taking. The sight before us literally glowed with a beautiful, radiant brilliance. It was a festival on what appeared to be an island. It was lights galore- they decorated the feudal castle that sat the very middle, the towering pagodas and simple buildings and living compounds along side shops and whatever else was in sight. Fireworks exploded and cackled menacingly. An absolutely HUGE ferris wheel sluggishly spun in the back ground. As it turned, the beacons of various colorful lights on its supportive pillars dimmed and blazed brightly in time with the faintly heard music in patterns. It was a sight like no other... just looking at it from here drew me in, and made me feel like a dreaming kid again. My mother always told me elusive stories of festivals like this. She said people always wore big, fancy kimonos and feasted on many foods; there were parades and dancers- there was everything!

I breathed deeply. This was going to be interesting.

"Well? Are y'all just gonna stare? We sure as hell gotta go up there!" I said happily. I stumbled down a hill clumsly and kept running. I focused excessive chakra into my feet and ran over top the water separating me from the festival. I'd always wanted to go to one, and now that I had the opportunity, of course, I wasn't passing it up!

"M-Mina-chan! Wait up, un!" Deidara called while running after me.

"Meet back here at eleven, brat," Sasori said and walked away. Deidara smirked; at least Danna was letting him have some fun for once.

Once finally reaching my destination, I stopped and stared in awe. The scene before me reflected elegantly off of the surface of the water. Deidara came up behind me soon after, throwing his arms around my waist from behind. I put my hands over his, "My mom always told me about this type of festival."

"Really, un?" He whispered in my ear. I clenched my teeth as a chill ran down my spine, "Yeah... she used to tell me about all the flashing lights and pretty kimonos and the food and fireworks... She said she always wanted to take me to one, but daddy wouldn't let her."

"I see, un..." He said and rubbed my side, "I'm sorry about that, Mina-chan... I'm glad I'm here with you though, un." My ears perked at that comment. Really now? I smiled, beaming happily, "I'm glad you're here with me, too! Most definitely! But... there's just one thing..." He made a questioning noise. "We are SO under dressed!"

"Do... d-do you really find this to be necessary, un?" Deidara questioned while standing outside of the dressing room. He blushed while glaring down at his attire angrily. Yes, I did force him into traditional dress, tabi socks, and geta sandals. I also got him out of his ponytail and eye-scope. He hated it, obviously. I pulled on and took off various layers of clothes. "Well, yeah, of course! We'll match!" I exclaimed and continued dressing. I looked to the single, full body length mirror and applied a light amount of makeup to match my whole color scheme- a subtle red, snow white, and glowing gold. He stayed quiet; and I could tell he wasn't exactly happy.

I opened the door, revealing my new outfit. I held my clothes to my body and handed him the butterfly obi, "Tie me up, please?" He nodded and did so carefully. I thanked him and brushed down my kimono. It was red with colorful flower print across the front; the length reached down to my mid-thigh. The obi and the separate cho cho were golden and the obi-jime was red. Just to give it a Mina-ish look to it, I wore a white, fluffy underskirt. Of course, I was also wearing knee-high tabi socks and geta sandals to top it all off. Deidara attached the cho cho and wiggled it around to where it was in the middle. He smiled, satisfied with himself.

I spun around happily with my arms out; right then, I was on top of the highest mountain. I could hold the whole earth in my hands! I sighed ecstatically; we hadn't even made it outside to the festival either! Deidara looked to me. He actually looked happy, as opposed to agitated, like I thought, and gave me his signature smile. I couldn't help but blush under his crystal blue gaze. "You look like a little, porcelain doll, un." I hugged him without his consent, and dashed back into the changing room. I grabbed my back pack that was crammed full with our cloaks and my other belongings. It was gonna pop from being so full! But... if I spent money like I did on our kimono outfits, I could count on having room by loss of banknotes.

"Let's go, Deidara-kun~!" I sung and grabbed his hand, starting off with a light jog. He laughed sheepishly and languidly followed behind, sandals clacking on the ground.

The streets were decently packed; there were many stands with refreshments upon refreshments and souvenirs. There were masks of animals provided; I wasn't sure what that was about, but alot of people had them, so I decided I would get one later, too!

"Hello, little lady, step on up and try the ring toss!" I looked over to a middle aged man who was waving a hand fan and holding a plastic ring in his other hand.

"Ooh, that looks fun! Come over here, Deidara-kun!" I dragged him to the stand and looked to the game host with big, excited eyes. I certainly felt like a kid again.

"I'll let you have a free go-round if you buy another, how 'bout it?" He asked and continued, "There are many prizes you'll find passed satisfactory!"

"Sure! I'll take the first, then you can have the other one, okay?" I replied and questioned my accomplice. The blonde looked at me doubtfully, "I dunno, Mina-chan, these games are always rigged, un..."

"Don't doubt the power of the ring toss, young man. There's no telling what you may win from this," the man cackled in a funny fashion and I could tell he was joking around.

"Aww, why don't you try, Deidara-kun?" I whined.

"Yeeeah, why don't you try?" The male joined me in my whining fest. I laughed and took the ring from the man. He smiled with a smug expression. I didn't say anything, but there was something odd about this man... I stood behind the line and closed an eye, attempting to focus on the purple, plastic stick- my target. "Besides... how can a ring toss be..." I tossed the ring, "Be rigged?"

"Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner! Now, your go, sir?" He beamed. I paid him the fee for Deidara and watched as he silently took his turn. I snorted as his ring bounced off of the stick and fell to the floor. "GOD DAMNIT, I TOLD YOU: IT'S FUCKING RIGGED, UN," Deidara bellowed with fury. I sweatdroped and pointed out the prize I wanted. It was a cute little kitten, obviously sewn by hand, from the looks. The fabric held many different abstract designs; it was mainly purple, white, black, with a soft shade of yellow; it had pastel purple colored buttons as eyes. I absolutely loved it. I squealed with joy and hugged it while waving to the man, "Thank you, sir! See you!"

"Take care of her for me, she's a personal favorite," he called. I nodded happily and I grabbed Deidara's hand. I looked to the blonde and gave him a sympathetic look. He was utterly defeated... "You wanna hold Ran-chan?"

"You already named it, un?" He laughed and gazed to the stuffed cat in my grasp. I smiled, handing her over to Deidara. "It means 'orchid.' I think Ran-chan likes you, Deidara-kun."

"Really now, un?" He muttered aloud, "What makes you think that, Mina-chan, un?"

I gripped his hand a bit tightly, "Silly, why wouldn't she?" He chuckled lightly, thanking me.

The lights were so bright I can't see the stars anymore. I sighed, then pointed out, "Deidara-kun, look, they have cotton candy and dumplings and sweet buns! Oh, it all looks so amazing... Are you hungry?"

"Ehh, not really, I could go for some cotton candy though... would you share some with me of I bought it, un?" He questioned. I verified so, once at the stand; Deidara bought us a ball of fluffly pink and blue sugar on a stick. Deidara held the stick for me, and I took a piece tp eat it quickly. It was easily the best cotton candy I'd ever had. I took another piece and held it out in front of his mouth. He took a bite.

"It's good, isn't it?" I gaped in awe.

"Yeah, it makes me wonder what they did to it, un! Anything that is overly good is usually horrible for the body, un..." He replied. I giggled in agreement.

This really was as fun as you said it'd be, momma.

"Deidara-kun!" I squeaked cheerfully, "Let's go on the ferris wheel!"

After we got our cotton candy, Deidara, Ran, and I went and bought souvenirs for everyone back home. I even bought Hidan, a gift, just to be nice, though he could be rather crude. Deidara and I both got matching masks in the shape of foxes; the colors of it were light pastels. We bought hand fans and played a small lottery game which coincidentally won us a small, plastic, spinning top. After that, we watched the fireworks on a bench; now, the only thing that was left was the ferris wheel.

"You sure you want to? It's alot bigger than your usual ferris wheel, un," He warned with concern. I slowly set my gaze upon him, and I found him looking back at me with a smile gracing his lips. Maybe it was the lights messing with my eyes or something, but I could have swore his eyes sparkled as brilliantly as the fireworks. I nodded in agreement and we walked toward the attraction. Within record time, we got into our quaintly spacey ferris wheel cars. The walls were made of glass and the floors were see through. The only things opaque were the seats and Deidara himself. The ride began turning and creaked loudly. I actually cringed at the noise, and sat down by Deidara.

"I'm not sure I wanna do this anymore, Deidara-kun... Ran-chan doesn't like this much either..." I muttered. Deidara gave Ran an unhappy look before handing her to me, "Because everything is glass, un?" I nodded, squinting. The excruciating noise was replayed and we were jerked to a stop. On the ground below, the ride manager loaded more people into their cars. Deidara scooted close to me and grabbed my hands to intertwine our fingers, "I hate to sound conceited at a time like this, but just look at me then, un," he said quietly.

"_He's probably only saying that because he's scared, too, in all reality,"_ I said to myself. The ride started once more and rose into the air higher as I feel my blood pressure mimicking the action as well. Ran sat in my lap and silently said that Deidara's idea isn't half bad... I stared nervously up into his ocean blue eyes- those beautiful, captivating eyes... The mouths in his palms licked my hands and I shuttered. Whoa, wait... was this all really happening?

"Mina-chan, keep breathing, un," he commanded sweetly. I smiled and when I least expected it... he looked to my lips with a small smirk and closed the space between us. I, mentally, immediately receded. _"OHMYGOSH, OHMYGOSH, RED ALERT! RED-FREAKING-ALERT! THIS IS NOT MEANT TO HAPPEN, MINAMI!" _My conscience yelled then continued into fit of profanity. A loud squeak and jerking motion caused us to bump noses. I grasped my face and felt how my cheeks burned to the touch; he did the same to his nose and muttered curses under his breath. Jashin? God? Whoever was out there- did you REALLY have to let that happen? I mean, really? You had to be bullshitting me! The ride stayed utterly still- that would have had been nice a minute ago... I looked to the blonde and, as if on cue, we both began apologizing repeatedly running over one another with our words.

"N-no, it was my fault," I muttered.

"Like hell it is, un!" Deidara began protesting. I rolled my eyes and put a finger over his lips, "No, seriously... It was my fault, so... let me try and get it right this time, 'kay?"

My heart started beating so fast it was about to burst out of my poor ribcage. The butterflies in my tummy were just about flappin' their pretty little wings off, too. I took a deep breath and gripped his hands tighter; the mouths in his hands responded easily, licking and nipping at my skin. I gulped and pressed my lips to his and pull away rather quickly. He stared at me with a bit of frustration, "You… you… missed my lips…" My eyes popped open and I realized the lipstick marks decorating his chin.

The ferris wheel screeched once more and the jerk followed. I scooted away slowly, yet in a fluster. I took in the sweet, fresh festival air, somehow trying to clear away what just took place as we exited this place I'd only seen in my dreams. I beamed silently though, but I listened to myself for once.

"I'm glad you dragged me into this, un," he murmured shyly.

I hold Ran close to me consciously, "Even if… I messed up that kiss?" He nodded as we approached the spot we left Sasori in.

"Do you two want to explain to me why you aren't in uniform?" Sasori asked once we meet back up with him.

"Well... there wasn't any danger, so I didn't see a need for it," I replied.

"That's not the point, you have a group of assassins, four to be exact, following your every goddamn move. You really think you need to risk your fucking life to have 'fun?'" He growled. Yay, time for a daily scolding. I sighed and looked to Deidara, who looks just about as miserable as I do.

"Mina-chan, do you not realize that your life is being threatened?" He asked.

"Danna, if you were gonna end up yelling at us like this, why did you let us go in the first place, un?" Deidara cut in.

"You two got back here an hour late! Do you know how fucking upset I was with the scenario going on?" Sasori yelled, "There's no telling what kind of shit could've happened to you, I mean, a shark could've jumped out of the water and ate you as you were walking back over the water, you could've gotten kidnapped, you could've gotten assassinated because you're wearing a girly dress and not your proper attire, you-"

"Okay, okay. We get it, un," Deidara muttered, "Well, we just won't go anywhere without you anymore, Danna, un." I heard the puppet grunt in annoyance, "We're staying at a hotel nearby."

He simply turned and walked away, expecting us to follow. We did so and make it there within ten minutes. The small inn hid behind the brush of the forest, it seemed. I wondered how in hell Sasori saw it- there weren't windows in the front wall, from what I could see. It almost blended in with the shadows; I noted how it looked more like a home instead of an inn or hotel. Sasori opened the door blatantly to reveal the interior of the building- green-ish walls with elegant paint swirls across them. Plants hung from the ceilings and took up the spaces in corners. There was a large, wooden desk in the middle of the room. Chairs around tables along with benches were scattered throughout the room. The lighting was a bit dim. This place certainly didn't look like any other hotel, I'd seen.

Sasori stood before Deidara and I to tap the bell impatiently.

"Welcome, friends!" Came the call from a back room. From the threshold, a lively looking girl appeared with warm, merry features. She threw her hands in front of her, "Welcome again! How many nights would you all like to stay?" She asked. She closed her lively, big, brown eyes to give us a grin. Her platinum blonde hair seemed to sparkle, oddly.

"Just one night," Sasori replied. In his voice, you could still hear that he had an agitated attitude. Fun.

"Alright then! That'll be thirty dollars, please," Sasori handed her the money, "Right this way," she said cheerfully. She led us up a rather narrow stairwell and into the first door on the right. Sasori, Deidara, and I walked in and studied our surroundings.

"Well, here you are; my name's Kazue, if you need anything, just give a shout, 'kay?" I nodded eagerly, wanting her to leave. Talk about annoying...

"Get sleep, we're leaving at the crack of dawn," Sasori muttered as he sits at the small table. I handed Deidara his change of clothes out of my backpack and he substituted his kimono with his usual attire in the bathroom. I did the same afterwards and put our fancy kimonos in my bag. Deidara and I got to bed as we were told. Seeing as Sasori was a puppet, he didn't need sleep. Sooo... for the whole night, creeper-ishly, he'd be watching Deidara and I sleep. Weird? A bit.

Anyway, I was really glad there were always two beds in hotel rooms... my "accidental" experience with Deidara was bad enough- sleeping with him would just be way, way awkward. Overly way awkward.

The moonlight stretched through the small window in the wall; apparently, the building did have windows! They were small, but they weren't nonexistent.

"Good night, Mina-chan, good night, Danna, un," Deidara said quietly. Sasori didn't reply.

"Good night, Deidara-kun." I watched the stars and tried to pick out the constellations expeditiously. I held Ran close to me and listened as crickets were heard chirping with the occasional call from a bird. It was really halcyon. Just as everything seemed at peace, I began nodding off into my dreams...

_Knock, knock, knock!_

I groaned and watched Sasori walk to the door. He opened it and two girls stood before him; they were oddly pretty... I felt a twinge of jealousy run through my veins.

"Hello, sir, we're room service!" They spoke together.

"I'm Kazuki!"

"And I'm Megumi!"

"Thank you for your consideration, but no," Sasori slammed the door. It grew quiet and I resumed floating off to neverland.

* * *

"Mina-chan!" I nearly jumped out of my skins as I sat straight up in my bed and looked around. There was silence. It was still dark outside the window. Glancing around, everything seemed eerily normal and unchanged. Sasori still sat at the table and Deidara was on his side sleeping... But... what was different? The door was still closed and, of course, the lights were all out.

"Ran-chan?" I gaped. What the hell? I watched as my stuffed- well, once stuffed- cat looked at me from behind Sasori's leg and mewled. Oh, I had to be dreaming... I let my body crash into the mattress, and I stared at the ceiling. I jumped at the feeling of four little paws pushing down on the bed, walking forward to me. I clenched my eyes shut. This was ludicrous. The small indentions in the mattress moved from the bed to my stomach and crept forward to my torso. I heard the mewing once more and I breathed deeply. I cracked an eye and yipped in surprise. The cat's cute, little head hovered above mine. It tilts to the side and meows again. "Nya?"

I looked at it with wide eyes. "Ran-chan?"

"Yes?" She replied. I screamed and sat up again. Sasori looked to me, "What the hell is your problem?"

"I- the- you didn't? What the- were you... Ran-chan was walking! And talking, did you n-not see or hear?" I sputtered and grabbed the cat. It didn't move at all. It was inanimate once more.

"Go back to bed; you need the sleep..." He muttered. I groaned and did as told.

* * *

"Take care of her for me, she's a personal favorite," he called.

So that was what he meant!

* * *

Yaaay, I finished chapter six!  
Ran is pronounced as 'Ron,' by the way.  
If any of you have questions about something, feel free to ask.

'Till next time!


	7. Finding Full Aegis

Ohhh mayne, it's time for flashback-age. I usually hate flashback scenes, so I'm not gonna put a huge load of detail- just get the point across. It'll end up telling how Mina was taken into the Akatsuki, blah.  
By the way, if you're new or you forgot, italics are flashbacks. Unless it's applies to the conversation they're having, then that's different. Ah, so confusing.  
This chapter has a lot of action! I'm not good at writing actions scenes, in fact, this is one of my firsts; so bear with me! If you have any critique to help me out, give it to me, I'm sure I need it.

Enjoy, please. :)

* * *

"I swear, I'm not lying! Why would I lie about this anyway?" I glowered at Sasori, "You saw the damn thing walking around, don't try to bullshit me, puppet!" This morning did not start out well for Sasori and I. From the beginning, all I could hear for miles was his stupid nagging about how I was in danger; Ran; Deidara not listening; and getting back in reasonable time. He was **still** flippin' over that?" My answer was: yes, precisely.

"I can tell you're lying, so don't tell me you aren't, Mina-chan," Sasori replied in a matter-of-fact tone, "Eat your breakfast so we can leave."

"How can you tell that I'm 'lying?'" I asked, befuddled, "You have a fucking problem…"

"I said eat," he muttered. I shoved my fork in the plate of food below me and stuffed it in my mouth, "Now explain!" Well, I was trying to say that, but it came out more like "Shmow exshhhplayn." You got the point.

"Not a lot to explain. I just know through experience," he said and stuck his nose in the air. I deadpaned, "That's a shit reason! Just because you're old doesn't mean you get to act like you know everything there is to know!" I kept eating and tried to tame the roaring beast within me. I looked to Ran as she lie on her side atop the table before me. She was in her "doll form," otherwise I would be freaking out and showing Sasori that, in fact, she _could _move. The hotel manager sat at the desk while occasionally glancing over to Sasori and I. It was kinda weird, like she was waiting or expecting something to happen... Here and there, the room service girls popped in and out of view, spewing words to the host, then disappearing through the threshold leading to back rooms. That certainly reminded me of the villagers back home- suspicious and antsy.

"There, I finished. Happy?" I questioned Sasori as I stood to throw my plate away. His riposte was "Hn." I grunted back and grabbed Ran off of the table while Sasori fetched Deidara; apparently, he wasn't feeling well this morning. His shiny turquoise eyes seemed dulled to a grey. His whole appearance just looked... worn out. Tired, sick- miserable- that was probably the best way to describe it. I looked around and yawned dramatically. This place was so boring.

"_What the hell takes Sasori so damn long just to wake Deidara up?" I asked myself. _Oddly enough, the lighting seemed dimmed. I heard shuffling, but not from the direction where Sasori exited the room. My paranoia sky-rocketed. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I accidentally dropped Ran and jumped; I seriously just scared myself? Good grief. "R-Ran-chan, don't jump out of my hands like that, silly..."

What happens next was beyond my belief.

As I went to pick my _stuffed cat _up, it emitted a blinding white light. I squinted and tried to see what the hell was going on. I blinked and the white was gone- a shadowed, dark figure stood where Ran had been.

_"A... A girl...?" _She looked back to me with a lowered head.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD! WHAT IN JASHIN'S NAME JUST HAPPENED?" I felt myself becoming dizzy as I stumbled left, then right, "What the hell is going on here? Aww, fuck, I finally went off the deep end, didn't I?" I clenched my eyes closed tightly and scraped my hands down my cheeks, being careful not to poke my bruise. This was NOT supposed to happen. Ever. Stuffed animals were made of fabric and STUFFING-WOOL STUFF, not... not, like, a brain or intestines or a heart. They were inanimate objects!

I opened my eyes to find the girl simply standing before me, her fingers intertwined and hands folded in her lap neatly. Her argent hair seemed to glisten brilliantly in waves of liquid pearl, and it reminded me of Hidan's hair color- liard, griseous or eburnean. "Would you like me to explain?" I looked at her in disbelief; WELL, HELL YES. "Umm, that'd be a help here…"

"Don't question your sanity," she laughed, "I'm simply a soul sealed in a stuffed cat. Not that hard to believe, is it?" I blinked blankly, "I... suppose not... But why the hell did-"

"And my name is not 'Ran,' I'm a princess, hence," she stated, "It's Himeko."

"_Hime- means princess, and -ko means child... Princess child? I guess that makes sense." _I glanced at her outfit; it favored her statement. She wore a short, pastel pink, ruffled dress designed for the highest respected members of royalty. A small tiara sat upon her head with an deep, purple, amaranthine jewel in the center. Her pale feet were strapped in sandals that wrapped around her ankles up to her calves. She really did have an elegant look to her; she appeared as a doll with such lovely features... So, this was a princess?

"'H-Himeko?' You're a... a princess?" I asked. I was still having trouble believing all of this... I mean... my **stuffed cat **turned into a "princess."

"As I said a moment ago," she said; I could hear a hint of annoyance in her voice, "You, apparently, are in grave danger. Stuffed animals are sealed with the souls of guardians for protection." Her aubergine, puce colored eyes bore a glazed glint of cleverness.

"I thought you said you were a princess though!" I gaped in confusion.

"Oh, that's my hobby,"Himeko held her hip and flicked her hair over her shoulder, "But, like I said, I'm a guardian. Sooo, what'd you do? Kill someone? Umm... Forget to pay a tab? Or did-"

"I accidentally stole some important documents, and they were ruined when my friend... 'threw them in water,'" I replied in mutter. I had never noticed how embarrassing that explanation was till now.

"That's, umm, pretty stupid," she scoffed. Well, hell, she was tellin' me. I sighed, "Yeah, and now I have a group of assassins trying to kill me. Interesting, hmm?"

"Not really," she retorted boredly and yawned, "Buuut I get to take on this form, so I don't really care." I gunned a glare her way. What a spoiled bitch; I was being sarcastic, she could've at least went with it.

"Well, you wanna tell me why you randomly chose just... poof into your 'guardian' self?" I questioned, irritatedly.

"That's princess to you, ma'am!" Himeko snaps, "Hmm... Well, you're obviously in danger-" she glanced around, then sniffed the air, "-that's why. You have some skilled ones on your tail." I stared at her wide-eyed. She stretched, "One from the Leaf, Lightning, and Stone. One wields a sword, one, since her weapon isn't visible, I'm guessing is a genjustu caster, and the other your typical ninjustu-user."

"Wait, there's supposed to be four," I squeaked.

"Then they aren't here. My mental radar _never_ lies," she replied while fanning her fingers, inspecting each for any flaw, "And... three, two, one~!" As she released her last word, she pranced to the side; as she does so, a huge blade sliced through the air she previously stood in. The light reflected off the blade as it was pulled upward once more, then viciously slung sideways in my direction. An _eep!_ wiggled its way out of my now dry throat as I jumped just above the gleaming slab of iron.

"Mina-chan, back!" Himeko called as she held a hand before her. The sword wielder repeated their action in the opposite direction. I landed on the blade, then clumsily pushed off and flipped backwards away from the attacker. I surprised myself; _how the hell did I do that?_

"Katon: Hibashiri no Jutsu!" She called with a smirk; a flame, randomly, if I may have added, appeared before her, kindled, then shot forward to surround the target. _Hibashiri... "Running Fire." _The vicious fire lit the room and revealed the face of the sword-bearer- Megumi- the room service?

"Damnit," one heard her curse as she turned to her left, then right, trying to find an escape.

"Fuuton: Kazekiri no Jutsu," Himeko finished after she performed the hand seals. A huge gust of wind cut through the fire, making it grow larger and spin. I walked over to Himeko and nearly have my face taken off by a kunai as it exits the wall of fire. I squeaked and watched it plant itself into the wall. "Here's room service!" Kazuki called, as she jumps clear over the tornado of flame. She landed on her hands and swiftly spun her body mass around, with her leg out. I jumped over it barely and before she had time to throw the other around, I hopped off my tippy-toes into the seat of a chair. I wasn't the best at ninjutsu, but I prayed to Jashin that this'd work! I signed the hand seal and whisper: "Bikou Ninjutsu." Kazuki stopped in her tracks and glanced around. I beamed happily and looked down seeing my hands were still visible. I quickly facepalmed and pushed that failure out of my head.

"Doton: Domo no Jutsu!" I gave a toothy grin- this one worked! Why? 'Cause I got one jutsu out of two! I watched as my normally pale- very, very... very pale- skin turned darker and absolutely rock hard. Kazuki turned and charged. She flung her fist toward my face, and I barely dodge, only to land an uppercut with my fist to her chin, "Don't be impulsive, Kazuki." She faltered, stepping away, and I bounced back right with her to throw a punch to her nose. I leaped over her frame which was now on the ground to Himeko. She glanced toward me.

"Well, that was easy enough. The other one left a long time ago, I have no clue why though..." She sighed and crossed her arms, "Well done, Minami-chan." I nodded and chuckled, "You, too, Himeko-hime!" She blushed, bowed, and fake cried, "Thank you, thank you~!"

"_Maybe she isn't that bad after all..."_

"What in God's good name was all of that damn ruckus?" Sasori yelled as he appeared in view with a tired Deidara, "And... who is _she? _And why the fuck is the ceiling on fire?_"_ He asked pointing to my friend then the flames nearby us.

"Well, this is Hime-chan, and we just fought off two assassins," I looked to Himeko and we exchange snickers.

"Just to clarify, I'm 'Ran', but, umm, that's only when I'm in cat form," she said holding up a finger, "Mina-chan isn't crazy, I did clearly hear you persistently saying that she's a liar. Who feels ignorant?" She and I were gonna be awesome friends!

"God, Danna, why'd you wake me up just to confuse me with all of this, un?" Deidara groaned.

* * *

"Dude, I know! Then you were all, like, Fuuton! And- and, it made that big vortex of fire- It was awesome," I sighed and smiled, "I'm just happy my ninjutsu didn't fail me too badly for once…"

Himeko smiled, "Your element is earth, huh?" My riposte was a nod and I said, "I'm from the Northern outskirts of Konoha toward Iwagakure side, so, naturally, I'm earth element."

"Wait... The Waterfall and Grass Countries both are between Stone and Leaf though..." she mumbled.

"The Stone Country's ways have influenced my people for centuries, just conspiring the region of the place. I can't really change that now," I repled with a chuckle. Himeko nodded and looked ahead, her hair swaying with the changes of the wind. Deidara had made another clay bird for the four of us, the one we were currently riding. He said he simply had a headache and he'd be fine after a nap... that was three hours ago. I was beginning to wonder if he was having, like, a reaction to the cotton candy from last night or something... or maybe I transferred germs through that kiss on the cheek… I'd feel so bad! I watch as he shifted in his sleep, and with a grumble, he tried to make himself comfortable.

"Are you worried about him?" Himeko chimes with her tinkling voice. It was worded like she already knew the answer. I pursed my lips and opened my mouth to reply, but she cuts in, "I'm a guardian angel- even though you aren't worried, always know there's reassurance." I smiled; that made me feel a bit better about things. There was a distinct smell of rain in the air, and in the horizon clusters of lethargic clouds released all hell- rain, lightning, and thunder. I loved that smell; it was my favorite along side cinnamon. In all truth, I missed my previous squad. It was different not fighting with that bastard Hidan every waking moment and teaming up on him with Kakuzu. I suspired lightly and simpered as Himeko brushed her hair out of her face and peeked over the side of the bird with a squeak. Apparently, I wasn't the only one with fears of heights.

"Minami-chan," I heard someone call; I looked up dazed and listened, "I must apologize for earlier." Yep, I already knew it was Danna.

"It's alright, Sasori-danna, I don't mind it," I replied. _That was a lie… I did care._ I smiled and he made a small noise of acknowledgement. He was certainly an odd one... Apologizing, then automatically ignoring. Oh well!

* * *

"Well... this is the place," I mutterd. Deidara was just now waking up from his nap, and you could tell. His eyelids still appeared heavy and his hair wasn't the prettiest at the moment; he commented earlier that he was feeling better, so my spirits had been lifted a bit. The four of us glanced around at our surroundings though there wasn't much to see at all- a run down, glum, ghost town. It looked like this for as long as I could remember. There was no one in sight, and I was glad. I remembered every single village member as if I had just left the village the previous day.

"Umm... it looks really... nasty and poor, honestly," Himeko spat and shuddered. I shrugged; everyone- literally everyone here- was well below the national poverty line.

_Today is the day I'm doing it._

_"Okaasan, did Akio-san give you another loan?" I questioned, chlorochrous eyes wide with mock curiosity. I looked to my mother as she struggled to hold back tears, whether they had been fake or not._

_I couldn't take all the bullshit anymore, so I was cutting it off at the source._

_"N-no, of course not, Mina-chan; Otousan told you he got a good job, remember?" She replied. Though I was seventeen, my mother still treated me as though I was ten._

_I wasn't as naive as people thought; I did have a properly functioning brain and nervous system. I was capable of amazing things._

_I was your daughter, I had always wanted to believe that you had faith in me._

"Sasori-danna, you have the profile of this man, correct?" I questioned. He nodded, pulling the envelope of information from his cloak. It contained a brief bio and a picture. Main information was the following: name, Aomori Akio; age, thirty-four; residence, small house by the village well.

_"I remember... but he's been wasting his time drinking. Well, that's what I've seen when I've been in town," I remarked. A pathetic tear dropped from her face while I continued, "Don't lie to me. I have a right to know whether I'm in debt to Akio-san or not."_

_"I said we didn't get a loan, dammit!" She yelled. I gave my mother a lethal glare, "Okaasan! I already know you got a fucking loan!" I yanked a bag of money out of my back pocket with a small paper stapled to it, "Don't lie to my face, you piece of crap."_

"I know that guy," I commented unhappily. He was the village innkeeper; an innocent man that helped people in whatever way he could. I shook my head as my coalition began walking toward the village well; unknowingly, I lagged behind.

_The little paper was a note from Akio; it basically said that we needed not to worry about paying him back immediately and that it would come in time. He continued on to say he'd help us whenever we needed it._

_Yes, I was capable of amazing things; but I was also capable of the opposite._

"Are you okay, Mina-chan, un? And don't lie to me, un!" I grimaced, "I'm fine... just... this all brings back memories I'm not fond of."

"I can understand that easily," he said slowly.

_And what I'm **going** to do will prove that._

"Let's make this quick, shall we?" Sasori questioned. I didn't object. Even if I tried to persuade them otherwise, it would just make things worse. Besides, I was part of the Akatsuki now- I couldn't be a baby! My alliance and I made our way to the inn. Sasori scanned through the papers once more, "There's no record of him being an aggressive fighter... I'll do this myself, otherwise, you all would keep me waiting hours..." The puppet handed me the papers and I organized them neatly without a word. I didn't object to letting Sasori do the dirty work either. I _knew_ that man; I used to see him every day; I didn't want his blood on my hands, no matter how ruthless of an S-ranked ninja or killer I may have been... Every month, Akio gave my family a loan. He kept us alive.

I threw the manila envelope down by me and crossed my arms. How long would this take? What would it sound like? Would he face a lot of pain?

_Throwing the bag down, I took a step back to the doorway, turned and burst into my room. My hands shook frantically as I scattered my belongings over my bed, searching and searching..._

_A lone, glistening, onyx-colored kunai._

Loud banging was heard and I looked to the sky. Deidara and Himeko both gave me concerned looks.

_"Okaasan?" I called and shoved the kunai in my pocket. I couldn't go back now... The middle-aged woman appeared on my threshold, anger laced her features. She opened her mouth to scold me, but I threw my arms around her. She stopped and watched, but then returned the favor._

_"H-hold on..." I reached down to my weapon, and pulled it up to drive it as deep in her chest as it could. I puledl it back out with a smile and felt my heart pound and pound. I could hear it and felt my body throb. With a swift motion, I clenched my teeth and aim at her throat as she began yelling and screaming and..._

_That was it._

I somehow didn't catch the fact that I was bawling my eyes out and collapsed to the ground. Deidara held me close to him and tried to shush me as Himeko brushes my bangs from my face, attempting to help somehow. I hiccuped and breathed faster feeling myself begin to hyperventilate.

"We can leave in just a minute, Mina-chan, un," Deidara cooed. I stare up at him and desperately gasped for air as my frame shook in various tremors. I gripped his cloak and tried to speak. Himeko, in the background, smiled a little at Deidara while bending down to put a hand on my limp, numb knee.

_It was clear I wouldn't be welcome here anymore... Otousan wanted to kick me out anyway. I stood above my mother's bloody, beaten corpse. The deed was done. I gathered my things in my favorite backpack and walked out of the house. If Daddy wasn't always out getting drunk, he would have been here, and he could've stopped me..._

_That was his fault._

_I walked to the living room and picked up the loan money; this was going back to Akio, definitely. My bastard of a father was supposed to have a job anyway. I left my home, dropped off the loan money, and made my way to the small village gates. It began to rain and the humidity rose. Perfect... I looked down to find blood across the front of my shirt- also perfect._

"You're as beautiful as an angel, un," Deidara said. Himeko, out of his view, placed a hand on her chest and beamed toward him while mouthing, "I take that as a complement!" I cracked a slight smile and heard myself beginning to quiet down.

_It wasn't long before I see wanted signs of bounty on my head; I ended up staying in an abandoned house on outskirts of the village because I didn't know where to go. After all that happens, I realized a goal in my life was to simply find myself a family. A fully functional one that was just _normal.

"Are you okay, Minami-chan?"

There was sheer silence.

"Minami-chan, un?"

_"Minami-chan?" The man questioned. I gunedn a glare at him, "What's it to ya?"_

_"Ooh, feisty... that's pretty damn sexy..." His accomplice mumbled while stroking his chin. I blushed, "Shut up."_

_"I like her, she knows when enough is enough," the masked man hissed while smacking his friend on the back of the head, "We're here to make a proposal. We've been sent to recruit you to the Akatsuki- Are you willing or must you be forced?"_

_"I haven't eaten in days, why the hell would I try to take you two fully grown men on?" I retorted and crossed my arms, looking away from them._

_"Smart move, girl," he replied coldly, "I'm Kakuzu… this is Hidan."_

_"Hey bitch, how do ya fuck?" He asked, laughing while holding a hip._

_"I don't like you already…"_

I gaze up at him and he asks quietly, "Are you okay, Mina-chan, un?" I reply with a curt nod. "Am I heavy?" The Stone-nin chuckled, "No way, I could bench press you, un." _Muscles... _That comment reminded me of a couple of days ago when I was... "ab flashed." An immediate blush consumed my face as I shooed the thoughts away.

"Goddamn!" I yelled and slammed my eyes closed, "You passed on your stupid headache to me, Deidara-kun!" I placed the back of my hand on my forehead dramatically. The blonde merely scoffed and knew I was fine. Amidst me and my whining, something white caught my eye.

"What the hell is that, un?" Deidara questioned. I laughed at his tone and simply looked up to the object as it soared through the air; it appeared to be a... a paper crane? It floated with the wind and gingerly landed in my lap. _Konan?_ I took the origami bird and carefully unfolded it to reveal neatly written letters of black ink. I scanned over it quickly and furrow my brow. Wait…

_Minami,_

_I know you weren't expecting to receive this while you're out, but it's urgent._

"It's from Konan-chan," I commented. Deidara leaned over to read along with me.

_If you have not finished the assassination, stop immediately!There is a great chance the man you were assigned to kill is our leader, that, or an innocent bystander. If he is no one that has to do with us, simply forget your mission._

_The leader you've been fending against at the quarters was, in fact, an impostor. Once after he was found out, he was discovered to be one of the assassins. He's informed us that no matter what we, as an organization, agree to do with him, his squad will affirm the completion of their assigned mission. Under interrogation, we've found he and his alliance are under an ex-Akatuski member, Orochimaru; I'm close to positive you know who I speak of. Despite the fact of our capture of this man, keep your eyes open for the other three assassins._

_On another note, upon the discovery of the impostor's identity, he attempted to escape. The base was destroyed due to him (and Hidan, both, really). After you've finished the mission or read this, meet us at the middle point of the borders of the Rain, River, and Fire. We all wish you well._

_-Konan_

I threw the paper down, and jumped from Deidara's reach to burst through the door in a craze, "Danna! Sasori-danna, stop, immediately!" I searched for Sasori and frantically pranced from room to room.

"Danna, stop!" I screamed once finding him. He turned to me with a raised brow and a confused Leader before him. The puppet sighed, "You're a little late, Mina-chan." I beamed sheepsihly upon seeing Leader safe. I hopped happily over to Sasori and grabbed his shoulders to lightly shake him with a determined expression, "Good job on not killing, Danna, I commend you!" I turned to Leader with the biggest smile I'd worn in a while. He simply stared down at me plainly, like usual, but I didn't care. I frolicked to his side and pulled him into a tight embrace. He probably wanted to kill me for that. The pale man stood completely still; his frame wasn't tense, I was guessing he was waiting for me to finish though. I just held on.

It was weird how relieved I was to see he wasn't the person that clocked me in the face... I never thought he'd have an impact on me, really... I knew he had physically hurt me back at the base, but I suppose he had hurt me mentally, too, the impostor did. I thought he wanted me dead as I recalled my biological father did.

But now that I thought about it, he was the guy in charge, and he took care of us whether we accepted that fact or not. He was like a real dad.

* * *

"God... today has been way too much for me," I muttered. Himeko and I were walking behind Sasori, Deidara, and Leader; they, apparently, were talking about the behavior of the impostor, pointing at my cheek and bandaged hand. I sighed and looked to my new friend. She did the same with a tiny smile, "You have your guardian angel though, Mina-chan." I nodded and she continued, "Are things usually this crazy for you?"

"No way! If anything, I get sexually harassed by an immortal pervert because he thinks it's funny... Otherwise, there's nothing I really have to put up with... Oh, but there's this guy that part of the Akatsuki, his name is Tobi. He's... well, he can be a handful. He's not exactly immature, but... then again, he is. Egh, it's hard to explain," I said thinking too hardly about my daily life at the hideout.

"I get your point; trust me, I've had to put up with a lot of those types," Himeko giggled and tossed her long, shiny, silver hair over her shoulder, "It's a good thing though. Having people like that give you guidelines on how to act toward others. They also teach you how to scold the childish! Oh, and about the 'pervert,' he better not come near me."

I smiled, "I don't either. Remember, hit him as hard as you want, he doesn't die."

"Right, I'll remember! Well, Mina-chan, I can only stay in this form for a few hours at a time- approximately six- so I have to go back."

"Alright... when will-"

"Trust me, as soon as I can get out of that thing, I will," she said with a dramatically deepened voice, "Anywho!" Himeko held up a hand sign and a bright light consumed her; when it cleared, the small, multi-colored kitten, Ran, took her place and began walking after the boys of our party. I smiled and followed after.

_Maybe I finally found my full aegis- my real, _close-to-normal _family..._

* * *

God, this chapter is cheesy. :(  
I hope you liked the new chappie anyway!  
Chapter eight will be up soon!


	8. Target: Acquired

Oh my fucking god, I just re-read a chapter of mine, and I have to apologize for stupid grammatical errors, misspells, and the fact I... kinda... mixed the Leaf Village and Fire Country into the mystical_ "Leaf Country..." _After watching and rewatching Naruto for three to four years, I'm surprised I let this slip so many times... I'll be fixing it, I'm just saying sorry! -.-  
I KNOW.  
I'M A DUMBASS.  
I'M FUCKING SORRY.  
Ha.

Sooo, enjoy!

* * *

"How the hell did that work anyway?" I questioned between gulps of food. I was starving beyond freaking belief, and I was sure that everyone could tell. I'd been scarfing this food down like no other. The pierced man's expression showed defeat. Leader sighed lowly, glancing to the side, "I'm not particularly sure." How could you not be sure about how you got kidnapped...? I mean, did they chloroform you, or like, knock you out? That type of thing should've been... well, explanatory.

"Hmm... That's weird. Of all the Akatsuki, I never imagined you'd be kidnapped. I can see that happening to me, but that's... that's another story..." I trailed off while pointing at him with my spoon. I looked to Ran as she was curled up in a tight, little ball in my lap and she started her little engine, releasing vibrant purrs. Ran could talk in her cat form, but... remember, we were in public, and we didn't want to look weird. Well, we didn't want to look _too_ weird. There was only so much we could manage. Deidara noticed Ran and laughed a bit; he shone his pretty white teeth, and while I was distracted, he stole a spoonfull of curry rice off my plate. I gunned him a glare that only fueled his laughter, and he smiled mock innocently.

"I see where you get that," Leader commented stalely, then, on another note, continued, "Sasori, when do you believe we will reach the final point?" Sasori's blank gaze wandered to lock onto Leader, "It won't be long," he replied, "But then again, I suppose our arrival could vary on how long those two take to eat." I squinted at Sasori with a sneer, "Hey, don't start with me, puppet, you were the one that said we could stop; otherwise, we'd still be walking." _That, and my stomach would've been eating itself._

"She has a point, un," Deidara said before continuing to stuff his face. I grinned and Ran stood in my lap, mewling repeatedly to the two older males. Her tone conveyed a smart ass attitude. I nodded, "You tell 'em, Ran-chan." Danna stared at me, and I began shoveling the plate of curry rice before me into my mouth so he'd look away and so he wouldn't expect me to say anything else.

After Deidara, Ran, Sasori, Leader, and I left my old village, my accomplices felt obliged to tell Leader about his impostor's crude behavior. I didn't know why though: it wasn't like Leader could change anything. Though he didn't do anything, he apologized anyway, and I thanked him of course. Ran then snipped in and threatened him because she was supposed to protect me. She said she'd put a whoopin' on him, and, honestly, I could see that happening. Deidara, after a while, got to feeling back to his old self, which I wa thankful for; a silent Deidara was like a tsunami without water- totally unnatural and awkward. Anyway, we were supposedly over half way to the destination point. While journeying back from my village, I was actually looking forward to returning to my own bedroom back at the oddly cozy (once you're used to it) base. But, of course, I had lost all of my possessions except for what I brought on the mission with me, and that fact deeply saddened me. I had totally forgot the base had been freaking destroyed by that assassin bastard... and partially by Hidan.

I sighed and patted my tummy, "Alright, I'm done!" I say triumphantly then waver, "Umm... someone roll me out of here. I'm so full that I don't think I can walk..."

Deidara laughed and poked my side. I reacted quickly, squeaking, and shying away from him; I smacked the blonde's hand repeatedly and Ran swatted him with her stuffed paw. He stuck his tongue out at her and she started ranting in loud meows. I glanced around and sweatdroped as random by-passers stared us down. Sasori cleared his throat, stood, and motioned for us to leave as he paid the food ticket. I grabbed Ran and held her to my chest; Deidara, and Leader follow behind Sasori and I as we walked out. Well, I waddled because of my bloatedness. Deidara made a clay bird for us, and we hopped on; much to Sasori's liking, we took off immediately.

Ran found herself a spot near the tail of the bird and curled up into a little ball, her favorite position. I giggled, and note how Leader and Sasori seemingly only talked to one another. Were we forming cliques here? Deidara, beside me, pulled me close to him, and I blushed as he draped his arms around me while grinning. It was quiet; once you'd heard it for long enough, the rushing winds sounded like nothing and made your head feel numb. The only thing you could hear in the silence was your own heartbeat. I leaned into his chest, and he dropped his chin atop my head.

I wondered if all the Akatuski members would already be there. Hmm... I missed Tobi and his... odd self. Sasori's dead serious aura tended to physically darken things, and I was sick of it. What if Hidan was there? Or worse... what if Kakuzu was, too, _with_ Hidan? Would Hidan try to pull something again to annoy Kakuzu? And, God forbid, what if he slapped my ass or some shit and Deidara saw, making him feel like he should say something? Deidara would have murderous intent written all over his face. I also wondered what exactly Hidan would do if I told him about Deidara's taste toward me. I would've been scared to bring it up.

Wait, what the hell was I saying? Hidan wouldn't care anyway, and he said he wouldn't annoy me anymore. Nothing to worry about!

"What're you thinking about, Mina-chan, un?" He asked.

"Just about where we'll be relocating to." _Well. Fucking lie, but that was something I'd previously wondered about..._

"That's what I was wondering about, too, un," Deidara said quietly.

"I hope we stay somewhere nearby the beach!" I exclaimed. Ran lifted her head sleepily and mewls, "Me too, definitely!" Apparently, my ideas were quite kick ass.

"We will not be staying by a beach. The borders are inconvinient for us. If we stay mildly in the middle, we have better access to every nation with relatively decent speed," Leader commented. Damn, he had good hearing...

"But 'in the middle...' that would steer us toward Konoha, un," Deidara cut in. Leader nodded, "My point exactly." I could see why he wanted to stay nearby Konoha, we did have to retrieve the nine-tailed bijuu, but then again, there were other jichuuriki's besides the one from the Leaf Village. That, and Konoha knew all of our identities, and I was sure they had a wing of their ANBU dedicated solely to keeping an eye out for any sign of us as an organization. All of the jonin were aware of us, so I found our relocation utterly risky and dangerous. There was one assassin still on my and Hidan's tail from what we knew as well. Did we have to jeopordize ourselves continuously?

"Well, if we're staying toward the middle of all the great nations, why're we meeting... not in the middle?" I questioned, giving him a befuddled look. Leader stayed silent, and I grimaced. I just wouldn't worry about it.

When we got to the destination point, we were immediately greeted with questioning gazes, smiles, and an extremely ecstatic Konan. Right off the bat, as soon as she saw him, she pretty much glomped Leader. His expression was unchanging, but I could tell he was happy. How could I tell? I just could, damnit, it was a girl's instinct. I smiled upon seeing this. I could tell he'd saw Konan's little outburst; he grabbed me by the waist and hugged me tightly, "I can do that, too." He whispered in my ear. I shivered, and he ghosted passed me to pick Ran up off of the ground. She pawed him rapidly, yelling at him, clearly wanting down, but he just chuckled and persistently touched her paws to annoy her.

"Mina-me-chan~!" I jumped upon hearing my name yelled loudly; I began to turn only to be tackled to the ground in a huge embrace. The air was knocked completely out of me, and I struggled to move. My cheek was squished inward, into my face, my something cold, hard, and plastic, if I was correct. Once I found myself able to breathe again, I found Tobi atop me, nuzzling my face with his orange mask lovingly. I laughed for a bit and hugged him back tightly.

"Oh, Mina-me-chan, Tobi thought Tobi would never see Mina-me-chan never, ever, for never again!" As sudden as he had tackled me, he stood and gladly helped me to my feet. I sighed, "I'd never leave ya without saying bye first if it were for forever."

"You're gonna end up hurting her one day, un," Deidara muttered unhappily. He brushed my cloak off for me and gunned an annoyed glare to Tobi.

"Oh no, Tobi would never hurt Mina-me-chan, and Mina-me-chan knows that," he said nonchalantly. Deidara growled at him and I put an arm around Tobi, "Tobi's just being nice, Deidara-kun. Tobi's on eof the few that keeps me happy around here!" Tobi squealed happily then bounded off to Zetsu and starts ranting about something I can't comprehend. Deidara rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Mina-chan," I heard someone call. Wait, I knew that voice- that sexy, velvety voice... I silently groaned and hoped things would go alright. I hushed my emotional debatings and pretended Hidan was in a sweet mood. I could deal with him like that any time, any day.

"Hidan!" The Jashinist made his way over to Deidara and I with his usual smug grin. You know, that grin that made him look like a bit of a prick. His lavendar eyes scanned me quickly and rested upon my face. Hidan opened his mouth to speak, but suddenly Ran escaped Deidara's grip and launched herself onto my shoulder. She hissed at the said male and turned to rub her little cheek against my own. I giggled quietly and patted her head.

"What the fuck is that... _thing?_" He questioned rudely, pointing to her with a disturbed face.

"You better watch your mouth!" Ran growled, "I'm not in the mood." Hidan's eyes automatically widened in surprise, jaw dropping a bit, "Shit, it talks?"

"I am most certainly not an' it'! I'm a fucking girl, since you can't tell, dumbass," she replied. His expression showed doubt. Ran jumped down to the ground and glowed elegantly with the same odd white light that I witnessed back at the hotel. When the light faded out, Himeko stood beside me. Her facial features were knitted together in anger. "See? I'm female, completely dickless... Just like you, bitch," came her insult.

Hidan just winked at her, "You wanna check, sweetcheeks? I'm far from dickless."

"Excuse you, I'm a fucking diva, you need to rea-" I covered her mouth with my hand and growl at the Jashinist. "Hidan, you're really gonna pull shit like this when we just got back? You definitely haven't changed while I was gone." I looked away and told Himeko that I'd explain it to him later; I also told her that his comprehension abilities lack, but I'd dumb it down for him. She merely crossed her arms, stuck her nose into the air and walked away before transferring back into Ran-mode, keeping space between her and the Jashinist- not that I could blame her.

Deidara sighed a bit and blowed up his cheeks only to entertain himself. Hidan laughed and pointed at Deidara, "Ha! Is that how you look when you give Sasori head?" Upon hearing this comment, I utterly decide Hidan's "pretend sweet attitude" was way out the window. I gritted my teeth and I wondered if it was the heat off of Deidara I'm feeling. I knew he was about to pop on Hidan's ass.

"Hidan, where the fuck did that come from?" I question him, "You're the one that always hangs out with Kakuzu, if anyone here is gay, it's you."

"Thank you, Mina-chan, un," Deidara beamed, then threw Hidan a glare. Hidan sneered at him, then looked to me and licked his lips leisurely. My pale complexion, in result, kindled into a deep red. This time, I was sure I could feel the heat radiating off of Deidara.

"You're lookin' sexy as ever, Mina-chan," Hidan said and winked at me, "I've missed your fiesty attitude." Hidan walked closer to me. Goddamn, what was he gonna do? I watched as he lifted a hand. OH GOD, THE VILE HAND OF GROPE-AGE! Before he can grab me, I reared back, and punched him in the mouth. He stumbled back, and I growled, walking toward the rest of the organization.

... That went better than I had expected...

Once we were by everyone else, I looked back to find Hidan with his hand over his mouth and Kakuzu at his side. Fuck, I knew Kakuzu was around somewhere! If the bastard would've just stayed away, none of that would have happened... They exchanged words, then the masked man slapped the back of Hidan's head before walking away. He sooo deserved that.

"You didn't even give me time to beat the shit out of him, un."

I giggled at Deidara, "Well..." Silence overcame me as I struggled for words nervously, "You know I can fend for myself. That, and Hidan would never hit me because I'm a girl. If you hit him... he'd-"

"He'd try and do something, but I'd break his ribs, right, un?" He finished. I pursed my lips, simply nodding in agreement even though I knew Hidan would snap Deidara in half, if given the chance, and he'd do it well. There was no use in fighting him on this one though, anyway.

"If he keeps bothering you like that, tell me, okay, un?" I probably won't. I'd rather not be the cause of a fight.

"Umm... well, I don't promise anything, but I'll try." I gave him a small hug.

"I see what all the ruckus was about now." I pulled away from Deidara, and he hesitantly released me.

"O-oh, hello, Kakuzu-sama," I muttered under my breath. Kakuzu nodded as a "greeting." The older male looks to the ground, then to me with an odd expression and cleared his throat, "I've talked to Hidan about his rather awkward habits. I'm aware that he acts as so only to upset me because I don't find sexual humor to be validly... humorous."

"Wait, you know about that?" I asked. Deidara hummed in annoyance, wondering what we were talking about.

"Yes, I do; I told him that by behaving that way, he's driving you away from him, and it's killing whatever amount of friendship the two of you may share. I'm unsure you feel bitterly toward him, but it's a hypothesis," he stated. The elder male stroked his clothed chin, "He claims he understands how he puts risks on it, but I'm sure he doesn't. I just figured you'd prefer to know that I've talked to him. I'm sure your patience is easily wearing thin about now, but I imagine he'd probably appreciate it if you bear with him."

I blinked blankly, staring at Kakuzu. Was he really concerned about that bastard's well being? He just insulted my fucking... what was Deidara to me anyway? A half-obviously-uncommited-boyfriend? I cleared my throat attempting to compose myself. He watched as I nodded, "Then again, there may be another cause, if you catch my flow."

The masked man's gaze traveled from me to the Stone-nin, and he walked away.

We'd confirmed the location of our new hideout and the fact that the impostor was executed by Hidan- right before we arrived, too. Hidan brought to my attention that the impostor was the man that he and I fought off back at the base, and he actually acknowledged that it was his fault the impostor even got to Leader; he never really took care of the male's corpse, though he told me he would. Of course, I had to comment on his stupidity, and he got pissed- yada, yada, yada. Same old, same old. I nearly forgot how much I "loved" having Hidan in my presence, then again, I had to commend him for even telling me that he messed things up thoroughly.

Aside, Leader moved me out of my squad with Deidara and Sasori; well, not technically. Leader said that I'd be reinforcements and whenever he believed my abilities were necessary for the mission, and he'd send me along with whoever needed my aid. I didn't complain, really... though, I _was_ unhappy when he told me I probably wouldn't have a lot to do. Oh, and after everyone gave their input on the matter, Leader determined our new location- the goddamn outskirts of Konoha. Just like the order-barking bitch wanted. No beach for me. I tried to change his mind, but of course it led to no avail. It never did with him, whether it was the impostor or actually Leader himself.

"This is... this is it?" I questioned. A large house. A large house surrounded by a buttload of trees. The windows were busted in, the door looked as if it was about to fall off the hinges- the outer appearance was just... pathetic.

"Yes, it is," Leader remarked lowly. I deadpanned; _what the hell?_ I puffed up my chest and crossed my arms, "Well, if that's the case, then I demand we go..."

It grew eerily quiet as I smiled happily and evilly plotted within my diabolical brain. The organization simply watched blankly, unaware. I threw a hand in the air, exclaiming, "Shopping!"

Konan squealed excitedly and agreed with me, "She's right, a shopping trip is _just_ what we need! Especially for this place..."

"Oh, but woe is me! The closest village is Konoha," I said blandly and sarcastically, shooting a glare to the nearly auburn-haired male, "We may be found out." Leader sweatdropped and realized that it may have not been the best idea to have relocated here. He stopped thoughtfully for a moment, "That's acceptable, Mina-chan, but for the rest of you that may join her, you have to disguise yourselves because they know of your identitites." I snickered; I got to show the Leaf Village my unique Mina-beautifulness. Neener, neener, neener!

"You mustn't take a chance of revealing our identity given we are so close to the Kyuubi. Do _not_ slip up, and give out information that may make us seem suspicious," Leader demanded, "You are to remain in your transformation appearance until you walk into the hideout, then you can release the jutsu." I beamed and in a swift motion, removed my big, bulky cloak, throwing it to the ground, then took my leg warmers off. I began chipping away at my nail polish with a sigh of relief. It felt great to be out of uniform. "Good then, I thi-"

"And there are two requirements for you, Mina-chan," he added. I mentally groaned as his gaze fixed onto me; it was probably gonna be all complicated and shit.

"If you're going to shop and whatnot, take it up with Kakuzu. He manages our money; also, you must befriend the jinchuuriki for future plans."

"Oh! That's easy!" I cheered, immediately lightening up. Leader gave the okay and I gave him the same gesture, nodding, "And I have money, I don't need to ask Kakuzu-sama!" I heard Kakuzu mutter words of sweet nothingness happily.

"So, who all is coming?" I asked a bit giddily. Deidara scooted toward me slightly; Ran scampered around his and my ankles, and I could tell she was really happy about this. Hidan smirked, raised his hand, and stood by me. The silver-haired Jashinist gave Deidara a glare, and he, in response, threw his arm around my waist. I glew a crimson red and simply stepped away from the both of them. I heard a chuckle emit from the curved lips of Hidan, who was mocking the fact I rejected him groping my side. Tobi flailed his limbs wildly while running happily over to my associates.

"No, un," Deidara muttered sharply. The masked man slumped suddenly and returned to Zetsu's side. I mouthed a sincere "sorry" to Tobi and told him that he and I would shop together soon. Deidara wasn't ever up for being annoyed to no end, so he took no chances.

"I'll join!" Konan waved a hand in the air and pranced over to us; Leader watched after her, sighed, and silently followed suit. The rest of the organization nodded and bid us farewell as we journeyed to the bustling, large Village Hidden within the Leaves.

* * *

The wind off the crisp, autumn trees smelled fresh and the scent of new fallen rain was barely registered. My collaborators and I continued further into this earthen womb of saturated green; tall anchored bodies stretched toward the sky and leaves responded with motion to air currents' slightest touch. A world where stillness enclosed the slow, deep pulsing of trees' heartbeats, the unceasing rhythm of their wild souls surrounded us. The shaded forest floor was cool; I shuttered at the temperature as I followed behind the rest of the group, jumping from tree limb to tree limb. I looked to Ran as her tiny, stubby legs struggled to keep up with our pace; she looked so darn cute! The cat looked to me randomly, "Nya? Mina-chan, watch out!"

Suddenly, the person ahead of me stopped, and I faceplanted right into their back. I squeaked at the pain welling within my poor little, now crushed, nose and waved my arms around like a maniac while trying to gain my balance. Hidan made a questioning noise, acting as if he hadn't felt me run full force into him and turned to grab my hand. My wide eyes glowed, staring to his hand and I swatted at the air, trying to grab it. He chuckled at my expression, and goes to reach for it, but... he _misses_ and I begin falling backwards. _Off_ the branch. Fuck...

"M-Mina-chan!" The Jashinist stuttered, surprised; I clenched my teeth and closed my eyes, embracing for impact. It was only when I feel myself contract whiplash when I knew I hadn't cracked my head on the ground below. Apparently, said man had slung his other arm and luckily caught me to me left, and on the right, Deidara held my arm. I groaned unhappily and slowly open my eyes to find the two intently glaring at me. I sighed, and realized I should be very, _very_ thankful for their Akatsuki reflexes.

"Are you okay?" They both questioned.

"G-guys, I'm fine..." I trailed off. Konan in the background covered her mouth sweetly. "Oh, my..."

"Way to almost let her break her head, un," Deidara said to Hidan, rolling his eyes. The immortal scowled, "Shut up, Barbie, people make mistakes. Besides, I least I caught her in the end."

"Deidara-kun, quit being a douchebag," I growled unhappily, holding up my fist as a threat, "Hidan, calm your ass down, please."

_"Ahem."_ I glared at Leader.

"While we're at a standstill, I suppose we should converse of our aliases," Leader commented loudly, capturing our attention. I bit my lip upon hearing the two up them grumbling to themselves, and refrained from yelling again.

"Mina-chan and Himeko-san will be keeping their current names, of course, while Leader will be taking on the name of Ryota." Konan beamed happily. Despite my aggravated thoughts, I couldn't help but smile upon Konan's newly gained enthusiasm. I wondered if it was coincidental that her spirits had been lifted since she found out the impostor wasn't really Leader, "I'll go by... hmm, Kotoko; Deidara by Daisuke, and Hidan by Hideki." I snorted upon hearing the names. They were... nice, but not fitting for S-ranked criminals.

"They're all easy to remember because all our names start with the same letter of our original names," Konan stated, "Well... except Leader."

"'Hideki?'" Hidan staggered aside, "That name is fucking gay!"

"No, it's not!" She faltered, "It has it's... its own form of masculinity, Hideki!"

"It means 'excellent trees!'" He yelled in reply.

"Himeko-san, Mina-chan, the jinchuuriki we're searching for has blonde hair, blue eyes, and odd, whisker-like markings on his cheeks," Leader commented lowly within the bustle, "Just so you know who we're looking for." I nodded and smiled; I wanted to be the one to find this jinchuuriki, I was determined! Think of how the rest of the members would value me if I did. Sasori-danna would think of me as a partner rather than a brat... Maybe Itachi would talk to me. I laughed and shook thought away, not caring whether the Uchiha spoke to me or not or is Danna liked me.

"... Well, exactly! The people here will surely love your name, they _are_ the Hidden Leaf Village, Hidan." The two of them continued bickering over the name, and in the end, Hidan settled for Hideki. I giggled and knew she gave him the name only to embarrass him. "Hideki" didn't fit Hidan's build. Leader sighed, unhappy with the time it'd taken for Hidan to co-operate, "Anyhow... now, just henge into someone that looks similar to you, but not the same. This village is decently large, we don't need to lose each other." All but Ran and I followed direction, and I noted that Konan looks adorable- her now pink hair reaching for her shoulders, lip gloss, and her usual origami rose sitting proudly atop her head. Leader looked the same, except for his eyes and all the piercings; Hidan... didn't look much different, except for his eye and hair color- the same for Deidara. Ran transferred into her normal form, smiling happily, her hair glistening brilliantly.

Jashin, I'd learned to appreciate Hidan's previous appearance. _"Just so you know, Sir. He would look odd any other way, as he does now, so thank you."_

"Okay, so now that those two are off the list, it leaves the last: our purpose," Konan grimaced, "This part is dangerous. If any of us say something different from another, we're done for, so let that fact be your inspiration to listen closely and get your story down."

"We're all ninja at chuunin rank; we're from Hidden Waterfall Village, all right? We're considering relocating to this place in search to pursue the building of our strength because our village is weak in martial and economical branches," Leader spoke carefully, scanning each of our faces for any hint of confusion.

"Clear?" He asked. We all nodded in approval.

"From the looks of the sky, it's near four or five; at seven, meet by the gates once more," he added, "Remember to be _nonchalant _and very _cautious. _Anyhow, onwards!_"_

After trudging passed the gates, bypassing the guards, I looked to "Daisuke," "Hideki," and Himeko, all who are miserable, except the said girl who smiled radiantly, admiring the sights surrounding her. Leader and Konan had left in their own direction only Jashin knows where, so it was just the four of us currently.

"Say, Mina-chan," the Jashinist spoke up, "Wanna hit a bar later? Afterwards we could-"

"_No_," Deidara snapped to emphasize, "she doesn't, un."

"I don't drink to get laid, Hidan, you know that…" I trailed off throwing the immortal an annoyed glance.

"But it's a perfectly fucking good opportunity you can't pass up!" He pleaded, "Damn, you don't even know what I was going to say and you say no... bitch." I swatted his arm at the profanity he spewed at me, "It's _that_ good, huh? Whatever did you have planned, 'O Bright One?'"

"Well, since I was interrupted, I got a different idea... Should I wait for you in the nearest closet, or will an ally suffice?" He questioned; his lips curled into a devious, dirty kind of smirk, and I felt my jaw drop involuntarily.

"Oh my fucking God, you're such a perv, Hida-" Himeko cut herself off, continuing quickly, "I-I mean, Hideki!" I faltered with widened eyes, trying to decide whether to beat the shit out of him or run away. Kakuzu isn't anywhere near here, so what the hell was going on? I looked to the ground and examine the number of pebbles staring back up at me; I could see Deidara in the corner of my vision, but I didn't look up. I hated seeing people unhappy, and I knew he was. Hidan slyly slithered to my side, popping into my gaze, "I'd like to name a multiple orgasm after you," he whispered. The shades of red decorating my face deepened even further, and I bit my lip; I felt my stomach churning at his crude statement. The Jashinist shone a satisfied smile and appeared to be holding in fits of laughter. My brows furrowed, an my eye twitched; I clenched my fist and punch him in the mouth as hard as I can and whenever he turned away, I jumped his back causing him to fall. "You're an idiot, Hidan. If Kakuzu was around, you'd be headless right now." I noted that that blow probably hurt my hand more than it hurt his mouth.

"What did he say to her, un?" Deidara questioned Himeko. Himeko fiddles with her tiara then looks to him while shrugging. The blonde sighed in annoyance, expecting more from the girl, and walked after me when I got up to leave.

I kept my head low, avoiding eye contact with anyone; I could've swore, Hidan got me so upset and emotional. If someone gave me a mean look, I probably had the ability to bawl my eyes out at the moment. I jumped upon the vision of someone before me just as they lightly bump into my shoulder. I stopped in my tracks, thanking Jashin that I wasn't struck in the cheek again.

"Oh crap..." came the mumble, "I'm sorry, miss!" Looking upward, I found a tanned male towering above me, despite his looks in age. I twiddled my fingers, admiring the red, triangular shapes decorating his cheeks. He had a scruffy appearance, and the leather he wore made me wonder if he had a wanna-be, bad ass attitude like Hidan. Surely his case of wanna-be wasn't as severe as Hidan's... if so, at least this guy knew how to say sorry nicely.

"N-No, it's my fault... I wasn't watching where I was going," I grumbled, then sigh lightly, "I apologize." He gave me a concerned expression, then chuckled, "You're new here, huh?"

"Why do you ask that so suddenly?" I questioned, a bit confused. He shone a pointed canine my way and winked, "Everyone knows things like that are my fault," he laughed once more, "I have tendencies of... well, recklessness. Or so my teammate, Shino, says..."

"Well, to answer you, I am new here, actually. I'm thinking of moving here from the Hidden Waterfall Village," I replied, "My name is-"

"Minami-chan, un!" I jumped a bit and turned slightly to find Deidara enter my vision. He stopped by me, examining my new friend with suspicious eyes, "Who's this, Mina-chan, un?"

"Inuzuka Kiba," the male responded for me, "And this is Akamaru." He pointed out his humongous wolf-like companion behind him. I deadpanned, "How in holy hell did I not see him before?" Kiba snickered as the dog barks right along with him. I rubbed my forehead, simply forgetting the matter, "Well... as you heard, I'm Minami or Mina for short; this is my... my brother, Daisuke."

"Ahh, I see! What clan are you two from?" He asked curiously. DAMNIT. I- secretly- shot Deidara a panicked look, pursing my lips.

"We aren't authorized to give out our clan name until it's decided we're moving here, un," Deidara commented calmly. Aha, how smart! I nodded then grimace unsurely, "Sorry, my friend."

"No, no, I know how that type of thing goes," he replied, "Of course, I don't have to worry about that. People see me and Akamaru and they know I'm of the Inuzuka clan." _Well... not really. I didn't know, at least._ Kiba held a thumb up, winking, "I don't mind the recognition though." Confident bastard, he seemed to be.

"Well, good to meet you, Mina-san, Daisuke-san, but I must be going," Kiba commented before hopping atop his mammoth dog's back, "Later." And with a swish of Akamaru's tail, they disappeared from sight. I bit my lip, "He's an odd one, huh?" Deidara just chuckled and nodded before grabbing my hand and pulling along the sidewalks of Konoha.

* * *

"Oh God, this is hideous," I grumbled. Deidara surveyed the little paper I showed him and stuck his tongue out in disgust to agree. I giggled and continued looking through the different color schemes. Before buying furniture, one must have decided the color scheme! That was Decoration 101 basic. The blonde picked a burgundy-like color and showed me, "Ooh!" I held his hand within mine, studying the deep red color, "I like this one! Hold onto it, m'kay?" He nodded happily, and I turned to file through the little sample papers of paint colors once more.

As a child, I had always dreamed of growing up and getting married to a nice and of course, successful man. I thought of what my house would look like- if I'd even have a house- what my occupation would be, everything. I remembered thinking of how the layout of my house would be designed, I picked out each color for every wall. As a toddler, I always thought of what things would look like through developed eyes, what things would look like at the age of eighteen. As a kid, I never imagined that I'd be stuck with an S-ranked criminal organization with a protective but uncommitted "boyfriend" and a serial rapist on my tail along side hired assassins. My ideas as a child were simple, hence, my ideas for my dream home didn't apply once I'd actually found myself a home. _Fuck._

"Dai-kun?" I asked.

"Yes, Mina-chan, un?"

I pointed toward the large window of the shop. The glass showed the outside world of the Hidden Leaf Village. Sunlight crawled within, warming whatever it touched with a gentle caress. People pass by the window, moving onward through their days normally. His gaze rested upon the object I was pointing at. For a moment, he furrowed his eyebrows, but I could see when he fixed onto the said point.

My eyes glowed in excitement.

Target: acquired.

* * *

Oh, god, guys! I haven't updated in forever! I'm sorry... I've been stressed out. That's always my excuse...  
Anyway, sorry for the wait, I'm back and updating. I hope you liked this chapter! I'm ecstatic for the future of this fic, I know exactly how a good majority of the plot is going to unfold noooaaw. YESYESYES.  
Reviews are always welcome, appreciated, and considered. I love hearing from you guys~! *Swoon.*

Chapter nine will be up soon because this chapter... sucked thoroughly.


	9. Touchy Subjects

OH MAYNE, LOVEY DOVEY CHAPTER.  
I warned you. It's not uber explicit or anything though.  
I'm trying to update when I can; but I have ideas for another fanfic. XD

Enjoy, please. :D

* * *

I had to admit, that when I first saw the jinchuuriki, I didn't know what to do. I kinda was just, like, "AWA! DEIDARA-KUN," while making faces of disbelief and struggling to contain my happiness. I was so sure that, ya know, I could have just pranced up to the blonde kid and became friends, but NOOO. Maybe things went the way they did because I was unlucky; that, or the women of Konoha were just naturally rude.

_"Sorry to interrupt, but Naruto has another matter to tend to." _I remembered giving that pink-haired bitch a glare; I gave her the biggest and worst sneer I could formulate. I also remember that she gave one back, and just as I was about to give her a piece of my mind, she ran away with her tail between her knees and the jinchuuriki before the boy could even say anything in protest.

The golden light of day was seen fading a bit; the skies were clear, so it was easily discernible. I grumbleed and Deidara heard it, probably fighting the urge to giggle at my frustrations. He simply stayed quiet though and grabbed my hand. His beautiful blue eyes traced the outlines of the ground below as we walk the outskirts of Konoha leisurely. The odd mouth on his palm fidgeted and moved; from what I'd concluded through passed events, he couldn't control the motions of the mouths. He sighed and blushed. _And it always embarrassed him. _I laughed a bit, muffling the sound with my own hand. He threw me a questioning expression, expecting explanation. _It always embarrassed him and that was the only thing that ever did. _I stopped and he did so, too, as I studied his hand. I turned it over, inspecting the aperture, "Why is that the only thing that embarrasses you?"

"W-Well... why not, un?" He replied quietly._ Touche'._

"I was just wondering," I laced my fingers through his and found his gaze fixated onto me, "I mean, I get embarrassed over..."

"Everything, un," he chortled at my reaction- reddening and frowning.

"E-Exactly... My point though, I've basically only seen you blush just now, not really any other times." His grip on my hands tightened and he avoided eye contact. The shy side of Deidara was revealed! My eyes widened in delight and a huge grin appeared. _How adorable!_ "It's not a bad thing."

"Yes, it is," he commented, "My hands aren't... normal, un. I can't control how they move, and that fact ends up messing things up, un." I looked at him in unamusement, an eyebrow cocked. I tapped my foot, "Is that so?"

"Well, they're good for blowing things up, un," he smiled happily. I huffed, "And they're good for setting you apart from everyone else." His expression was crosshurt.

"Deidara-kun, they make you special!" I said brightly, "Unlike me, I'm just... _blah._ I'm average, I suck at fighting, I'm always emotional- you know the works."

"It's odd how people like you and I would kill just to be the opposite of what we we're born as, un," he replied, "You want to be an outcast, and I want to be normal, un."

"You aren't an 'outcast,' Deidara-kun," I grumbled, shaking my head, "If you were an outcast, you'd be living... under a rock or in a box or something."

"And you aren't average, Mina-chan, un."

I receded a bit, trying to realize what he was getting at. The male shone his signature smirk, and with a voice of liquid velvet, he continued, "If you were average, Hidan wouldn't be trying to get in your pants-" he grumbled something lowly after the comment "- Tobi, though he's naturally a fucking idiot, wouldn't tackle you every time he saw you, Himeko-san wouldn't be here to protect you, and if you were average, you wouldn't be in my arms, un." He pulled me into a warm embrace, and my heartbeat quickened.

_I'm not dreaming this... am I?_ His hands tickled my back lightly, fingers twirling locks of orange-colored hair. I sighed happily and determine that I wa officially on Cloud Nine. He moves his lips to my neck and plants little, innocent kisses on my pale flesh that sent me reeling a bit. A fuzzy feeling coils in my tummy and I gigglde at the alien sensation. He brought his fingers to the neckband of my shirt and pulls it down ever so lightly to continue nibbling at my heated skin. I tiledt my head back and tangle my hands into his hair, and he pulled back to peek at me. The cool air rushed across my dampened skin, and chill bumps arose over my body hastily. Deidara's breath caressed my cheek as he looked at me with such an expression, I was only able to flush and feel myself begin to perspire. A husky growl emitted from the back of his throat, and it was music to my hungry ears.

_"Mina, don't you fucking do it," I told myself. "You're getting horny over a guy that... obviously just wants a hit and run. You better fucking stop it! Close your legs and GET THE FUCK OUT!"_

He trailed kisses from my neck to my earlobe and gingerly bit it. He tasted the shell of my ear and moved to the junction of neck and collarbone. A generally small mewl erupts from my parted lips, and I gasped a bit, realizing the noise I just made. Deidara nuzzled my cheek and looked me in the eyes; his eyes searched my own with lustful intention reflected from within. I held onto his shoulders loosely, ready to break for it. The little voice inside my head wouldn't say that stuff just to say it.

"You're so beautiful, Minami-chan, un," he whispered. His tone of voice was low and tempting. And sexy. I moistened my lips, trying to unchap them, "T-Thank you, Deidara-kun."

"You didn't mean to make that noise did you, un? I could tell by your reaction, un," He laughs and placed his hands on my hips. I nervously nodded, fighting an urge to laugh; he smirked, "It was sexy, Mina-chan; don't worry, un." Blood settled in my cheeks and I lit up like a Christmas light.

_"Deidara, Mina-chan, remember to meet back at the gates in thirty minutes," _Leader's voice called. I nearly jumped out of my skin. Damn him and his stupid mind jutsu, but at the same time, I thanked Jashin for it. He probably saved my virginity. I groaned, "Right, Leader-sama." I could swear he butted in like that on purpose.

With a shaky sigh, I walked passed him and he followed in disappointment. Well, I was sure the people of Konoha prefer that kind of thing happened where they, themselves, couldn't see us.

* * *

"_Oh my fucking God_."

"Hn?"

"Did you _see_ all that?"

"Nothing after the first minute."

"What a fucking whore!"

"... Ino-chan, they're probably together; that girl doesn't... appear to be a whore."

"Whatever, Shikamaru-kun, you're only defending her 'cause you think she's cute!"

"No... I'm pleading her case because I don't know her," the male comments, "You'd do them a favor by _not_ watching them do... what they're doing."

"Why the hell do you care if you don't think she's cute, Shika? Besides, I can't help it! They're snogging so damn loud that I can't even hear myself think!"

"Don't call me that, Ino-chan... Let's just head back already."

"You know, you really need to- _blahblahblah- _but seriously! I think- _blahblahblahblaaaah..."_

"Troublesome woman..."

* * *

"What is this place?" I questioned. I looked around at my surroundings, Deidara walking ahead of me. His hair shone a rusty copper color. I hated his hair. I wanted his blonde-not-disguise hair back, and his blue eyes, too. A green eyed brunette didn't look right for Deidara. The brunette turned a corner and holds his hip, "I thought so. It's the old Uchiha Compound... where Itachi and his family used to live, un." Deidara glowered to the ground; I crossed my arms and tilted my head.

_It was weird... I could barely handle taking my mom out... I didn't see how Itachi slaughtered them all._

"What a selfish bastard... killing his clan for his own sake, un," he muttered, "At least his family thought well of him, un." The silence consuming the two of us was nearly agonizing.

"... He has his reasons, Deidara-kun," I replied gingerly. I knew Itachi was a touchy subject with Deidara, but let's be fair. Itachi didn't just get a random thirst for blood.

"Reasons to kill his own family... his family that loved him and thought he was a child prodigy? Heh, people are twisted, un," he commented, "His life was perfect and... poof, un."

"Deidara-kun."

"Then once he's killed everyone off, he thinks he's the fucking best; he's above everyone and anyone, un." Deidara didn't move; simply, he glared at the ground.

"Wait, I'm sure there's more to it... People don't just... kill their family for their own good," I explained.

"No, he's just a heartless douchebag, un."

"I think I would know, Deidara-kun."

"How so, un?" I grew quiet; he kept his eye contact from me, and I gulped nervously while deciding I wasn't going to cry as I explained.

"Well... first hand experience here," I pointed to myself, "I killed my mom."

Deidara turned to me with wide eyes. His eyebrows seemed to quiver in surprise, and I could tell he was at a loss for words. I licked my lips, sighed, and whispered, "Sometimes... as selfish as it is, you have to resort to that type of thing. My parents never did think much of me, so I can't make up a reason as to why Itachi would want to kill his family, but I'm positive he, himself, _did_ love them."

I wondered if Deidara found me heartless, too. It was really hard to tell the expression in his eyes; his orbs reflected hurt, surprise, and frustration.

"I loved my mom... but when you think you know what's best for yourself, you do what your ambitions say to." I closed my eyes and walked to the buildings. It all happened quite a while ago, but I still couldn't talk about it. The wind blew viciously and sent chills racking through my body.

I glanced around at the dark buildings and they simply looked back. All these houses used to be full of prospering ninja, and now it was just... empty. The silence was different from what I shared with Deidara or anyone else for that matter. There was just something about it that seems to speak; it reached out to pull you in and told you a story left behind and unheard. My ears perked upon hearing a creak, but I ignored it upon seeing Deidara walking on one of the houses' porches. There was just nothing there anymore. I wondered what it looked like when the Uchiha family thrived.

"That's why then, un," Deidara called from a window of one of the houses. I was jerked from my thoughts, "What?" He appeared in the threshold of the house and held out a hand, beckoning me to him. I blinked blankly and took hold of it. He pulled me into the house and wrapped his arms around me.

"You killed your mother... but no one else, un."

I nodded slowly and he swayed a bit, "You didn't want to face them, un." My throat tighten as I tensed.

"That's why you were so sorrowfully mourning; you left them to the sight of your mother... and you couldn't face them again, un." That stung. My lip quivered; a sudden pressure was dropped upon my chest, with the urge to merely fall over.

"Mina-chan, I understand why... And it's okay, un."

"That's ridiculous. A murderer is a murderer, it doesn't matter which way you cut it. Itachi and I are the same inside because of this, so I guess we don't have souls. Don't tell me I'm different or that you understand..."

"Don't compare yourself to Itachi, Mina-chan, you'll always be better than him, un." He placed his hands on my shoulders, "You aren't heartless either, un."

"Don't change it around because you dislike Itachi." I muttered complaints under my breath and he watched me sadly. Moments of quiet later, we left the Uchiha Compound and headed to the village gates where we were supposed to meet Leader, Konan, Himeko, and Hidan.

"Holy fuck, I forgot all about Hidan and Hime-chan!"

* * *

"You ass! I don't see why you're so damn surprised, I mean, God, have you heard the way you talk to her?"

"Well, fuck, Hime-san, it's not my goddamn fault!"

"Hell yes, it is, Hidan! Don't act like your some innocent pussy!"

"I'm not the pussy here, you're the one the turns into a cat!"

"Proudly... but that's not the point! You expect to get positive feedback when you act like an ass? That's bullshit, you can't treat a girl like that and woo her. You can't try and screw her friends over either, even if you don't like them!"

"Jashin, why're you even talking to me about this?"

"You asked me to, douchebag! That, and 'cause I'm a girl. This is about girls. I give you insight and supply you with what you need to know."

"Okay, remind me not to ask you anymore, cunt..."

"I'm not a cunt; shove it down your cock suckin' throat, please, and thank you!"

Himeko and Hidan walked along a sidewalk nearby the village gates; their consistent yelling and obscene cursing either attracted peoples' attention, or it drove them away with ease. The two silver-haired immortals talked of Hidan's trifles and tribulations, much to his dismay. The Jashinist actually asked Himeko for help first, but regretted it as soon as she replied. Her sassy attitude didn't mix with Hidan's own, and they both acknowledged this.

"Seriously though, Hidan... Mina 'likes' Deidara because he's-"

"A fucking jackass."

"No, you belong in that category, and she doesn't like you, now does she?" Himeko growled, "As I was saying, Mina pays decent amount of attention to Deidara because he doesn't crack horribly mean jokes and doesn't cuss repeatedly like a little faggot I know."

"Mother fucker!"

"Also, Deidara knows his way around. He's talked with her when he's had opportunity, and during that time, he's found her likes and dislikes and kept them all in mind. So... he knows that she doesn't like... perverts! Since he knows that, he knows not to slap her ass. Unless they were already doing something kinky..."

Himeko giggled as Hidan facepalmed.

"Well, you get what I mean," she composed herself, "He knows there's time and place for everything, and being pervy is only for the bedroom, probably at night, if ya know what I'm sayin'."

"Hime-san, I know what you're saying..." Himeko looked to him wide-eyed, and he blushed in fluster, "N-no! I meant in general about this whole conversation!" Himeko laughed giddly and he continued, "I told Mina-chan that I act like a pervert whenever Kakuzu is around to annoy the old man, and that's true... but there's also-"

"When she's around Deidara, right?"

"... I guess; only when he tries to be a fucking show off though," he muttered, "But the truth behind it is really more that that."

Himeko raised an eyebrow, surprised, "Oh, really now? Care to enlighten me?"

"Jashin."

* * *

"Good God, this forest is so damn thick," I muttered unhappily, jumping from tree branch to tree branch. Deidara laughed a little, "You know-"

"Hey, you guys!" I stopped on the next branch, as did Deidara. We jumped to the forest floor and turned as a flash of orange appear before us. I held my hips, watching.

"I have to apologize for Sakura," the voice called and Naruto appears before us. I smiled and found Deidara was doing the same.

"I'm Uzamaki Naruto." He threw us a huge grin and a thumbs up, "But... since you were wanting to talk to me, I'm guessin' you already knew that..." I laughed and nodded, "I'm Minami and this is Daisuke."

"Minami-san and Daisuke-san... Nice to meet'cha!" He said happily. Deidara said nothing.

"A pleasure," I replied, "Aren't you a happy-go-lucky kinda guy? I don't see that much."

"I... wouldn't exactly say that..." He trailed off, "But like I said before though, I apologize for Sakura."

"Oh, it's fine! I mean, I can't really blame her," I said and looked to Deidara. He smiled as a greeting, "We're of the Hidden Waterfall Country though, so- allies, we are- there aren't any worries, un." Naruto nodded and crossed his arms, "Yeah, Konoha's subject to numerous attacks yearly, so it's _per-retty_ darn smart to keep on your toes at all times, though I don't oblige to that. All people are innocent until proven guilty, I say."

"Isn't that... what the court goes by...?" I asked quietly. Naruto paused, "Eh? Umm, well, yeah... But it makes sense!"

"Well, Naruto-san, it's great to see a friendly face around here; we just arrived today, you see-" he nodded in understanding- "I'm afraid we have to be going though."

"All right! How about the three of us go for ramen tomorrow? Just to get acquainted!" He proposized. Deidara nodded and I made a face of confusion.

"What's... 'ramen?'" I questioned. Naruto nearly fainted, "You're never had ramen? It's only the best food on the face of the earth! Gah, I could go on for days about it! Well, you have to get going, just meet me at the gates tomorrow at one-ish, okay?" I nodded and looked to Deidara as he nodded. With a farewell, the two of us headed to the destination point.

* * *

"Ah, Mina-chan, Daisuke," Leader called. I deadpanned; how the hell did he know we were behind him? WHAT A FUCKING NINJA.

"R-Ryota-sama..." I stuttered, greeting him, too. I look passed him to find a pink haired Kotoko- or Konan- Himeko, and Hideki- or Hidan. I threw Hidan a glare for the remark he gave me earlier. _Jackass._

"Did you succeed in your tasks?" He questioned me. I sighed, "Deidara and I are supposed to meet the jinchuuriki tomorrow around one to acquaint ourselves, so I guess you could say that one task was accomplished... as for the decorations... well, we're a bit behind."

"The people here in Konoha have bad taste, it certainly isn't our faults, un..." Deidara added, "But we'll shop when we return, un." Leader nodded to us, "Well done, Mina-chan, Daisuke, I'm impressed you even made contact with the tailed-boy." We beamed at him. Grade A teamwork, right here!

"Konan and I have found critical information that will be shared at the base; Himeko-san, Hidan, did either of you... did either of you even do anything?"

"I survived, like, two hours in this filthy place," Himeko saed proudly.

"Right... Everyone, head back..."

* * *

"Orochimaru has been pronounced dead."

Those five words caused the most commotion I'd heard in a long time.

"Fuck yes!" I looked to Hidan as fist pumps into the air, and Kakuzu actually appeared to be praying. Tobi jumped with joy, and yada, yada- _everyone_ is happy, that was my point! People were supposed to be sad when others died. Death wasn't good for anyone!

"For you two, Mina-chan and Himeko-san, Orochimaru was an ex-Akatsuki member. He was... well, obviously, he was disliked," Leader explained then turns to everyone, "This being said, Sasuke is, assumptionally, looking for you, Itachi."

"Sasuke?" I questioned.

"My younger brother," Itachi said. I looked to my left finding his onyx orbs scanning my emerald ones. I mouthed an "o," and gave him a thumbs up. _That was right! I totally forgot Itachi spared his smaller brother... See? He wasn't evil, he had a heart._

"Keep on your toes; he's been under Orochimaru's wing, so there's no telling what he may pull, if anything at all," Leader concluded. I pursed my lips and gripped my hips. He must have meant trouble for Leader to be bringing this to attention. Interesting! A challenge every once in a while was good for anyone; fighting was exercise and exercise did the body well.

"If at all possible, we will be attempting to take him in when we know he's stable," said the tall man, "Coincidentally, Itachi and Kisame, the two of you will need to go on a number of consecutive missions to keep him away from the base; sorry to single you out."

"Not a problem, I understand this is all apart of my actions within the past," he spoke. What a cool guy... in a selfless way, too! I wished Deidara didn't have to have something against him, he seemed like a decent person.

"I will talk with both of you about your missions after I'm done speaking," he turned to Deidara, whom was behind me. I blinked blankly, thinking he was motioning to me.

"Deidara, Sasori, you two will be going on a mission; it may be rather lengthy, but it depends on your progress. Hopefully, with the willingness and the drive to do your best, you two will succeed with speed and good timing."

It awkwardly grew quiet and I coughed.

"A-anyhow... Zetsu, you'll be clean up for Itachi and Kisame, they'll need you," Leader said, "And Tobi... just... go with Zetsu."

"Zetsu-saaaan~!" Tobi bounced up and down and boxed the air, "Let's gooo!" I giggled and Tobi waved at me after hearing me do so.

"The rest of you, you're free to do whatever, but if you're planning to journey out into Konoha, stop by my..."

"_'Central office?'_" I asked sarcastically. From what I'd seen of the house... there was nothing in it. Yay, we all gt to sleep on the floor! _Joy..._

"Tobi thinks everyone should have a slumber party while there are no beds!" Tobi suggested. I shuddered, not really liking that idea.

"That's a good idea, Tobi!" Konan encouraged happily, "Just for while we're all... bedless..."

"That could last days though... Konan-chan," I uttered slowly. She flicked her wrist, shooing the problem away, "Well, it'll be a multiple day event, Mina-chan! Sounds great, huh?" I barely agreed.

"Leader-sama! Can Tobi stay for the slumber party?" The orange-masked man questioned. Leader sighed, "If Zetsu doesn't mind your absence." Tobi turned to the odd-looking male and encouraged him to stay at the base. That sealed the deal; Tobi would be running around like a chicken with its head cut off.

"_Don't_ cause trouble though," he snipped angrily. Tobi saluted him.

"He won't Leader-sama!" Konan sang happily and winked at him, "The slumber party starts tonight! I'll be heading out to buy things to make it all more fun."

"That's all for the announcements; as for both squads I called for, stay here to receive your missions," Leader said as everyone began stirring and walking away.

"This is is actually sort of... mystical-like," I said in an awkward tone. Deidara watched as I walked passed him to the staircase at the back of the room. I scaled the "fancy" spiral stairs that climbed upward three stories. Once I got to the top, I wondered if I'd faint if I looked over the side for too long. I shrugged and leaned over the railing. At least thirty stories stood between the floor and myself, and that was how it needed to stay when I was up this high.

I'd always been told that dropping things from _very _high altitudes was dangerous; even spitting could really hurt someone! I bit my lip, "Hmm... I wonder." I watched to see if anyone was walking below me and spit.

"Gah, what the hell was that?" I jumped upon Hidan suddenly entering my vision. Once I had spit... Hidan, with his awesome timing, got it right on the head. From the way he reacted, the spit didn't hurt him... It was just disgusting. _It only hurt from really, really high places, I had to remember that..._

"Aww, fuck!" Hidan looked up and found my wide, green eyes staring down at him in utter shock. A blush decorate my pale skin as I yelled a bunch of incoherent gibberish. Hidan rubbed his head lightly and tried to get it identify what coated his head.

"Uhh... c-come here, Hidan!" I yelled; he angrily obliges while spewing curses, climbing the tall set of spiral stairs. He stood before me, heated, "Did you... spit on me?" His yell echoed through the mansion, and I bowed in embarrassment. I grabbed his wrist and yanked him into the bathroom. He stared at me, confused.

"On your knees," I commanded. He paused awkwardly before doing so. I turned the bathtub faucet on and pushed his head under, hoping that the water wasn't too hot or cold.

"What the hell, Mina-chan? Goddamn!" I pulled my shampoo out of my backpack and lathered some in my hands hurriedly. I scrubbed it on his hair and rinsed it- all this took place in record time. I searched for a towel and groaned. My only options were an undershirt or either my or Deidara's kimonos from the festival... Deidara's kimono it was. I threw the dress robe on his head, "Uhh, just hang that up when you're done." I patted him on the back, "Sorry, Hidan..."

I jumped over the railing after checking for peoples' heads, and landed just as Deidara began walking to the stairs. Deidara smiled a bit, and it kinda looked like it hurts his face to do so. I gave him a perturbed gaze.

"I absolutely hate this, un."

"What happened?" I questioned. The said male leaned on the wall by the door with his arms crossed.

"Leader says I'll be gone for a while, un," he responded. That statement kinda caught my tongue; and I couldn't think of what to say. A silence consumed him and he lowers his head, "He said that... it's supposed to be really dangerous, un."

"How so?" I whispered. Was I supposed to be happy or upset about this? Even the little Mina in my head was lost.

"Danna and I have to travel to the Land of Demons," he said, "And to top the fact off that it's dangerous, it's really far away, un."

"I-I've never... never heard of it, Deidara-kun. Where is it?" I asked unhappily.

"It's over seas, un." My stomach flopped inside me; over seas...? Okay, that was enough to worry me over anyone.

"Mina-chan, I'm going to come back for you," he commented, continuing, "I'll be back soon, un."

"You won't be here for the slumber party, and you won't be with me tomorrow when I try ramen for the first time, and..."

"Yeah, I will, Mina-chan... those are the little things that make life important to you, right, un?" He asked, watching me nod.

"Then, if you want me to be, I'll be there; simple as that, un," Deidara replied, "Would you doubt me, un?" I didn't say anything. Seriously, Deidara, you won't be here. Please don't make me think otherwise by driving me crazy with hallucinations.

"I have to leave now, un."

And the agonizing wait began.

* * *

Yaaay for chapter nine!  
Deidara has to leave Mina behind for a while; what becomes of her as she's left to mope around Konoha? So much. XD  
I hope you liked this chapter!  
Thanks to everyone for reading! I know what's going to be happening in the future of this fic, so, coincidentally, I _won't_ be facing Writer's Block any time soon! Take that, you stupid block!  
Reviews are very much appreciated; I love hearing from you guys, and getting emails saying you've alerted me as an author or this story (if you can't tell, this story is my pride and joy, haha). Thanks for every form of support there is out there.

Chapter ten will be up soon!


	10. When WTF Becomes Sincere

Hello, hello! This chapter isn't very long, compared to the others I've written because time has been of the essence. TT^TT  
I'm beginning to lose inspiration, honestly, and reviews have come to a stand-still at seventeen... That's awesome, considering this is my first fic, definitely! But... you know what I mean. It seems like no one is reading, haha. I may end this one a bit prematurely due to that fact, I'm not sure yet though.  
Anyway!

Enjoy, please~!

* * *

"M-Mina-chan!"

"Hidan!" I threw my hand up in the air, and Hidan grabbed it. I could feel the wind trying to pull me down as I fought against it. The Jashinist pulled me onto his lap and I scramble to hold onto his neck. I hated this fucking mission...

_Wait... how the hell did this all even happen?_ A large explosion beneath the two of us sent me reeling and I struggled to keep from yelling. Hidan's facial expression was contorted with anger; I looked over his shoulder to the mushroom shaped cloud that was rising quickly, now behind us. The large bird I'd summoned, which earlier I officially named Beppin, flapped her wings madly, speeding through the airborne smoke and debris at ridiculous speeds. I tumbled off of Hidan to his side and nearly fell off the bird; but I held onto his cloak, then circled my arm around him. The adrenaline pumping throughout my system was flowing at an incredibly rapid pace, and it felt like I had to use all I had to simply breathe.

"Feh, persistent fuckers..." Hidan grumbled various complaints under his breath and turns to watch as our enemy jumps from tree to tree to keep up with us.

"Mina-chan," Hidan called. I immediately looked to him, a bit panicked. He took hold of his scythe, "I'm gonna take care of him. Go back to the base."

"H-Hidan, no, they're after me, too. If I go back, they'll follow and it'll endanger everyone else," I pleaded, hoping he'd change his mind. He sighed, "Let me take care of 'em, just stay out of the way." I shot him a glare, but shook it off; I was sure he didn't mean it offensively... well, I thought. I patted Beppin's feathery back, and she responded, flying downward. As we lost altitude, Hidan stood and jumped off into the billowy smoke that still hadn't cleared out.

"Oh, Jashin..." I said unhappily, "Oh, Jashin... oh, Jashin..." I smacked my forehead and tried to figure out what I should do. Beppin flew above the tree-line once more and waited for another command... but I fell short.

"The assassin that Hidan supposedly 'executed' didn't die for some reason... and the two others Himeko and I fought didn't die, somehow, and the last one... fuck, there's no telling where she is!" I stood to pace, "Karma's a fucking _bitch."_ I squeaked upon another explosion being heard.

"Beppin-chan!" I said, finally deciding what to do, "Drop me off nearby Hidan, please." Staying silent, the bird obliged, and I hopped off her back. I looked up just as she flew by the sun and disappeared in a puff of smoke gracefully. It grew eerily silent, and I clenched my fists before taking hold of a kunai in my right hand. Taking a deep breath, I checked my surroundings and crept forward through the thick brush; I stopped upon hearing a twig snap, and performed a hand sign, "Bikou Ninjutsu!" I looked down, holding my hands out- see through. I smirked and decided I'd been doing a little better with ninjutsu! I jumped over the bushes and landed on a tree branch, trying to be quiet. I looked around, and spotted my pursuer: the male, Kaito. He glared at me as if he saw me, and blindly flung numerous shuriken and kunai my way. I started to sign a jutsu but stop myself. _He wanted me to do something to show him where I was._ I sprinted to the side and jumped to another branch, whilst doing a flip. Fancy, eh? I created a clone of myself. The invisible clone jumped to the forest floor and performed hand signs, "Doton: Kekka Doroudoumu!"

I hopped to the ground myself and peeked around the tree as the ground below my enemy cracked, and quickly rose above him. The pieces of earth made a large dome, closing him in. I smiled in success.

"Two can play that way!" I heard Kaito call. With a shrug, I stuck my tongue out at him, though, he couldn't see it. I deactivated the jutsu and dusted my hands off proudly.

"Minami!" I jumped and spun around on my heel unsteadily. Hidan captured my vision and threw a kunai at my face; shaken, I blocked it with my own. The utensil reflected off my own and soars behind me.

"What the hell, Hidan?" I yelled. Hidan ran over to me and ignored my outburst, grabbed my arm, and threw me behind him to the ground recklessly. The Jashinist's skin was black with odd, skeletal-like patterns currently; it was his no-more-mister-nice-guy outfit, I'd concluded. I watched as he pulled a weapon seemingly out of nowhere and slung it wildly; it kind of looked like a spear... Somethin' like it, anyway. My eyes widened upon hearing a nasty sloshing noise, and I realized that he had purpose in throwing that kunai at my head. While it was dangerous, considering my usual sucky reflexes, the kunai reflected off my own and sunk straight into Kaito's shoulder.

_Oh, so, when he said "two can play at that game," he was talking about making a clone, too... so... my clone trapped his clone then. Aww, fuck my life, man! I couldn't do anything by myself!_ I blinked and my clone joins my side after dropping her jutsu. Hidan laughed like a maniac, and I watched as he drew the Jashinist symbol on the ground in either his or Kaito's blood.

"Hidan, you better not cut anything off, I don't have one fucking clue on how to sew!" I yelled right before he impales himself. He hissed and groaned in utter ecstasy before swinging his scythe at the victim instead of inflicting self-harm. The stroke of his scythe accompanied the cadence and music of the destruction of air, and as it motions around to what was Kaito's head- a loud noise was heard and I flinched.

_POOF!_

"Goddamnit, _another_ fucking clone! Gah, I'm gonna shove a tree up that little pussy's ass if he doesn't fight fucking fair! This is bullshit, and I'm sick of it!" Hidan spewed, absolutely and purely infuriated, "I WANNA GO FUCKING HOME." Hidan stomped like a kid and fumed nonstop; I looked to my clone and she and I bursted out in fits of giggles. Hidan glared at me, "What the hell are you laughing at?"

"Y-you, silly!" I said, pointing to him. He lightened up a bit, merely confused and unsurely rubbed his neck. He pointed to himself, "Me? Why? I'm pissed to high heavens, what's so damn funny about that?" I rolled my eyes and walked passed him, poking his nose on the way. My clone smiled at us and disappeared in smoke.

* * *

"This is fucking stupid," Hidan remarked. I cocked an eyebrow, "You think so?" He muttered something under his breath and fidgeted.

"Did they forget about us or something? They disappeared, for Jashin's sake!" Hidan yelled unhappily. I shrugged and hopped to my feet, "Let's go find Konan and Hime."

"They could be anywhere by now though! My feet freaking hurt, I wanna go to bed!" The male complained.

"Oh, quit whining, you big baby!" I said, "We have to finish shopping! Well, unless you wanna shop by yourself in Konoha, 'Hideki.'" I laughed and bit my thumb to summon Beppin once more.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" A moment later, I found myself standing before what appeared to be a large and severely crippled version of Beppin. I held my hands in the air and whined a loud "no" to the sky. Hidan activated his thoroughly hated disguise, and he and I sauntered into town by foot to find Konan and Himeko. And to shop some for our hideously ugly hideout. And to shop for the stupid "sleepover."

"I'm almost broke... this is gay," I growled. Hidan laughed at me, and I punched his arm. He didn't seem to mind much though. He followed me into a clothing shop and faltered a bit, "You're shopping for... _clothes_, of all things?" I glared at him and simply and clearly nodded before scanning through a rack of clothes. I held a sweater up to my torso, "Unlike you, I can't just wear some sweatpants and nothing else. I have boobs, and I prefer to keep them covered. That, and I only have two pairs of clothes, excluding my cloak, of course." It's true- I only had what I was wearing now and that cute kimono I got to match Deidara for the festival. I put the sweater back on its hanger and walked to the next aisle over. Hidan followed behind.

"Umm, you okay, Hideki?" I questioned. He blinked blankly, "Well, shit, what's it look like?" I rolled my eyes and took a dress off a hanger, immediately deciding I wanted it. It was a white sundress with red lace on the ends and red buttons; I found a mirror and held it up before grabbing a white cardigan to match it. It _was_ autumn, meaning, it was pretty damn cold, and a cardigan went with anything perfectly! I glanced at Hidan, "You don't have to stay right under me, you can go look in the men's section if you want... I'll buy you something if you find anything."

"Nah, I'm good," he yawned and stretched, "It's fun watching you look for clothes anyway." I blushed in embarrassment, "W-what the fuck?"

"You're facial expressions are so damn serious! You get into it, it's hilarious!" He replied, laughing, just to prove his point. I shut my eyes and hung my head. I tiptoed to another aisle while ignoring my accomplice as he stared me down, "Okay, well, if you're gonna stare at me like a creeper, be useful, and help me pick another outfit out..."

"Fine, all you had to do was say so." I deadpanned, not exactly expecting that response... I sighed and turned away from him.

"Here," he commented, holding up another dress. It was a soft, sky blue with white intertwined within the appearance- it was decently simply... just emphasizing on the torso. He handed it to me in a bored demeanor, and I inspected it.

"I-It's a corset dress... do you want me to look like a whore?" I wavered quietly, "Might I remind you, I live with a bunch of sex-deprived men, I don't want to look suggestive!" Hidan huffed and raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. I blinked dully and shrugged, "If you insist... And now, shoes!" I scurred to the shoes, Hidan, too, and thought it was pretty darn nifty that they were all zori- ninja shoes! They had either open or closed-toe; white, navy, black, or some funky silver for the color choices; and they varied from ankle cut, to knee cut, to thigh cut. I raised my eyebrows upon inspection of the tag.

"These," Hidan said, pointing to the white, thigh cut boots. My eyes widened. _Really, Hidan...? _The Jashinist handed me the box with the pair of shoes inside, "They're pricey, but you'll look cute. Worth it, right?" I shyly agreed, heading for the checkout counter.

* * *

"I... Hidan, I'm not sure about this..." I mumbled. Hidan had insisted that I wore the outfit he chose for me along with my new shoes. He groaned, "It's Hideki, Mina-chan, and I take it you're changed. Get your ass out here." He yanked the door of the changing room open and I glared at him unhappily, arms crossed.

"What's there to be unsure of?" He questioned, walking passed me to grab my bags, "You look... you look fine. Now, let's get a move on; it's dark, shops are gonna close soon." I simply stared in surprise as he carried all of my things out of the room and out the shop. I fixed my zori; it really was a pain. Seeing as they're thigh-highs, as I preferred to call them, they slipped down my legs like a bitch, and it sucked! But... they were cute, so all was well. The main thing that bothered me is the length of my dress, which was ridiculous. Neither was I used to practically having my ass hang out in the open air, nor was I used to wearing tight- very tight- things around my breasts. It was like I had to heave five times to get one breath. Wryly, I chase after Hidan and we continued with our shopping, keeping a keen eye out for Konan and Hime. Suddenly, he stopped and dropped my things, and I swayed in anger. "What the hell was that for?"

"Why am I carrying _you're_ things when I'm so tired?" Hidan asked, mostly to himself.

"Carry it, or it's all getting left," I replied, walking ahead of him. The Jashinist shrugged and followed. I peeked back and ran back to fetch my things after knocking him in the head.

"So, you're sure I don't look like-"

"Mina-chan," Hidan didn't even look at me but said, "You look beautiful, so shut the fuck up for once, okay?" _Well, damn, asshole!_ I thought then that it was only natural for me to light up red. _He probably only called me that to justify him telling me to shut the fuck up... _

"There they are! I thought they got raped or some shit... Kotoko, Hime-chan!" Hidan yelled. A pink-haired Konan spun on her toes and ran to meet us, Himeko skipped right along her side.

"We were looking everywhere for you guys!" Konan exclaimed, "You two really gave us a scare!"

"And you gave Hideki a boner!" Himeko laughed; Hidan growled as she continues, "Damn, Mina-chan, you look hot!" I sputtered gibberish, but gave up and simply dropped my head onto Konan's shoulder. She patted my back, giggling, "Well, all of our bags are right over by that building. We bought tons of stuff, so you guys don't have to worry about it." I sighed and thanked Jashin; I was broke, so that's good.

"Yeah, we got stuff for the house and the sleepover, and we got food and toothbrushes, and everything else! Oh, and clothes!" Himeko replied. Konan chimed in on the word _clothes_.

"Well, it's safe to say it: mission accomplished! Leader will be so happy! We got plenty of stuff!" Konan beamed as the four of us turn, and continued to the base.

Okay, so, that mission wasn't too bad after all...

* * *

My jaw dropped nearly as far as Hidan's and we looked to each other in complete and utter shock. In synchronization, we yelled, "What the _fuck?"_

"We're sorry to have given you two a hard time, but there's no need to worry now, friends," Kazue spoke, referring to Hidan and I, "Since our master has been killed, all orders have been dropped; in fact, we're here to make alliances." I looked to Leader, baffled, and he simply stared them down suspiciously.

"We're sorry," Megumi whispered shyly. Kazuki smiled sweetly, "If you don't agree to it, then that's perfectly understandable."

"We'd like to make it clear, though, that if we are on good terms, we promise to pledge our services to you without question. If any of us go against our pact of peace, death will surely follow; we expect the same of you all, too, though," Kaito added. Leader sighed and nodded agreeing, "That's accpetable."

_"__WHAT?_ No, don't be ridiculous!" I yelled, "This is fucking blasphemy!"

"Now, now, Mina-san, there's no need for hard feelings, is there?" Kazue said. I glared at her and Hidan replied for me, "Well, hell yeah! You tried to fucking kill us!"

"Serisously! And then when-"

"Hidan, Mina-san," Leader muttered, "Don't embarrass yourselves before the new additions..."

"No, no, no! Leader-sama!" I practically whined, "Do you know what you're gettting the Akatsuki into? They're the ones that destroyed our hideout! You... you can't th-think that's acceptable..."

"Mina-chan, let it go, please."

I growled and lightly stomped up the nearby stairs and walked to my room, which was the room farthest away from everything- the last door on the right. I glared out the window into the starry night; a sound of shuffling grabbed my attention, and I turned to find Hidan and he sat my things down. I thanked him for finally deciding to carry it all and just slumped over. He stood behind me and looked to the sky, too. "It's bullshit, huh?"

"Beyond it," I mumbled. He put a hand on my hip, "Things'll get better, Mina-chan." I shivered and simply shook my head; that was hard to believe when now I had to sleep with one eye open to escape being brutally murdered in my sleep.

If Leader would just listen to me...

* * *

Welll, there's chapter ten. Yeah, it's short. Again, sorry. The next chapter will be longer!  
Reviews are _greatly_ appreciated. *Hint, hint~*

Chapter eleven will be up soon :)


	11. Fuck Slumber Parties

Hey, guys! No, I didn't leave you all. IBTGTM lives on!  
Just for being a stupid jerk, I've made this chapter agonizingly long, in my standards (approximately seven thousand five hundred words)... It took quite a while to write, even though I'm a fast typer... -.-  
But it's to make it up to you guys, so it's worth it!  
On a brighter note, I've decided on what will happen further into this story. I'm trying to plan it all out while I'm having jolts of inspiration, and I think I've got enough to last me a little while, thankfully. Once school resumes, I probably won't get to sit down and write, seeing as how I'm changing schools. Atop that, I'm being forced to skip Geometry and plunge straight into Algebra II... Math is my worst subject, and it doesn't help that I never took Pre-Algebra, and now I'm taking Algebra II. _Joy, eh?  
_The song in this chapter belongs to its rightful owner.  
By the way, (SPOILER ALERT for those who aren't far in the manga) in this story Tobi's face isn't all icky/old lookin', haha.  
On with the show!

Enjoy~!

* * *

_What had Konan dragged me into...?_

I sighed and growled under my breath. Hidan nearly copied me. I looked to him and watch as his lip twitched. Normally, I would laugh, but in my current state... _no way in hell would I laugh._

"Mina-chan! You're on!" Konan yelled from the common room. I treaded the kitchen floor unhappily and walked in. Konan had tried to make me look like a popstar to the best of her abilities; she tied my hair up in two ponytails with pretty, silky, white bows on either side of my head. Then, she threw strings of big, fat pearls around my neck and attacked my face with layers and layers of makeup. Himeko helped her with the that. Afterward, they shoved a huge, gaudy ring on each of my fingers. I felt like a plastic doll with all this _goop_ splattered on my face... As for Hidan, Himeko put a far from brisk amount of makeup on him, too. I felt very... _very_ sorry for him. They degraded and belittled him as a man. Atop that, Konan said that he wasn't not allowed to cuss or wear his cloak (he obliged to that, and I was fine with that, too...) the whole time we were doing karaoke. Wait, I forgot to mention that till now...

_We were doing karaoke. Yeah, fuck my life. They used their money to buy a damn karaoke set._

Turned out, Himeko and Konan came up with the idea themselves. They were so proud of each other, but as for every other Akatsuki member (except the assassins, they're the reason why we're doing this- to make a "good impression..."), we couldn't say the same. They were even forcing Leader! _Leader!_ They had both assigned each of us a song to do, and they said if we got an encore, we had to do duets with another person... I walked in the room and stood before my audience. _My much hated audience of rivals. _I groaned and Himeko handed me the microphone. She beamed, "I picked this one just for you, Mina-chan! It reminds me of... well, me! Go get 'em, tiger!"

_I'd rather not... _The screen on the karaoke set lit up and displayed words as I grabbed the microphone provided. I quickly read the lyrics beforehand, and gawked at the little screen. Holy shit, I knew this song!

"_The very best Princess! So treat me just us such, carve it in your heart! Okay?_" I mentally fainted repeatedly. I couldn't believe I was singing this stupid song... "_Number one: always notice my different hair styles. Number two: look at me from head to toe. Got that? Number three: for everything I say, reply with at least three words. If you understand, then do something about my lonely right hand! Not really, I didn't say I was so spoiled. I want you to think I'm cute, from the bottom of your heart." _Hidan walked in, smiling wickedly at me; I sweatdropped, blushed, and looked away,_ "The very best Princess! Just realize it- hey, hey! Making me wait is out of the question! Who do you think I am? Whatever, right now I want to eat something sweet! RIGHT NOW! Ah! Check, one, two... Ahhh! Fault? Don't you mean charm? I won't allow any complaints! Hey… are you listening to me? HEY! Ah, also, a white horse is obvious right? Come and pick me up, if you understand, then serve me! Bow, offer your hand, and say 'Princess.'_" I heard Himeko squeal in delight and start clapping.

"_The very best and my very own prince!_ _Realize it…c'mon, c'mon!_ _My hand is empty!_ _Such a shy and unsociable prince…_ _Gosh, why? Hurry, and realize it! __You don't understand… __don't understand… Short cake with strawberry on top, top of the line mouth-watering pudding. Everyone, everyone is holding back. Don't think I'm such a spoiled child! I can hold back if I put my mind to it! I'll just regret it later on... Of course, that's because I'm the very best Princess! Always keep an eye on me, 'kay? I might leave off to somewhere. Suddenly, I was hugged from behind, it's so sudden! Eh! 'Watch your step, it's dangerous,' you said as you turned the other way… saying it that way is more dangerous… Ah! 'Hey, Baby!' Ahhh!" _The music stopped and I literally gasped for air. That last, long scream took it out of me... Suddenly, I heard clapping. Looking up, everyone present within the base apparently heard my performance. I sighed in embarrassment and simply throw the mic down before zooming out the door into the kitchen. I plopped down in a chair and let my face crash onto the table.

"Damn, you have a nice set of lungs," came the voice. I turned my head to see Hidan. His expression showed amusement. _Well, one of us enjoyed that..._ I muttered a smart ass comment under my breath, but he didn't hear it.

"I didn't know you could sing!" He yelled.

"Because I can't..." I replied, "Hng, I want food." I stood up and slugged over to the fridge, and reached for the handle. I whined loudly when Himeko slapped my hand and said, "Don't be a pig, Mina-chan; we're all going to eat once everyone finishes up singing!"

"No, no, Hime-chan! Don't mind me, ya know, it's okay if I get left out!" I said angrily, opening the fridge.

"Mina-chan. _No,"_ she replied and shut the door. _Damn, she had been such a bitch lately... _I gave her an intense glare and simply walked away, into the living room, in between the audience and Tobi (who was singing his little heart out happily), up the stairs, down a very long hall, around the corner, and into my room- the very last door on the right. Thankfully, Konan and Himeko found sales on inflatable chairs; mine, coincidentally, was neon pink. I favored it quite a bit. Once I walked through the door, I dove for the little inflatable chair and quietly sat with closed eyes. My stomach growled, telling me that it was eating itself as last resort. I moaned in reply and patted it lightly. Konan had kindly reinforced me with lollipops, but those didn't help when you were hungry, those were just for when your sweet tooth was annoyingly poking you with a stick. I heard my door close; A small chuckle echoed throughout my room and I felt a tap on my arm. I opened my eyes to find Hidan with a bag of potato chips in his hand. I reached up and flail my arms, "Ooh, gimme!" He held it just out of my reach, "Demanding, aren't you? You could thank me, you ingrate."

"Usually people say thanks _after the fact_," I cocked an eyebrow. He handed them to me before sitting down in front of me. I opened the bag of chips and popped one in my mouth, then offer one to him. He languidly took a couple.

"Fank yew, Hi-an," I said with my mouth full. He nodded, "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Oh, I shoulda known there'd be a catch," I shook my fist as he gawked unhappily at me. I faltered, "Hey, just kidding."

"You better be, I'm not that big of a dick..." he muttered. I stared at him a moment, "No comment."

Hidan sighed, "Anyways... it's about how you always get mad at me and stuff."

"Not exactly a surprise there, but go on."

"Well... I don't really act like a pervert because of the old man... I do, but I don't. Well, that's not the main reason, I mean," he said. I blinked in confusion as he searched my eyes for a response. I blushed a little and ate another potato chip, "W-well... what about it then?"

"You know I'm a Jashinist, that's fucking obvious, but... the only damn thing that makes me want to act that way is because of Jashin..." I threw him a look of suspicion. _Was he trying to make excuses up?_

"Well, I'm a _Jashinist. _I'm not _supposed_ to be _nice."_

"If you weren't, would you treat me differently?" I asked. He raised his eyebrows, "Hmm?" I shook my head, "Nothing... is that all you were gonna say?" I rolled the opening of the bag of potato chips closed and set them down, then got a lollipop. _Cherry, my favorite!_ It grew quiet between Hidan and I and he agreed. I leaned back in my chair to close my eyes once more. I heard Hidan get up and expected him to walk out, but I flushed whenever I opened my eyes to see Hidan as he leaned over me and pulled my lollipop out of my mouth with his teeth. My eyes widened in utter shock and surprise, and I got that stupid butterfly feeling. He smirked smugly before putting the lollipop in his mouth and turning away.

"You look really cute when you blush, Mina-chan," he said and walked out.

_Holy fuck, what was that?_

* * *

Thankfully, I talked Konan into letting me get out of singing a crappy duet; instead, once everyone surpassed their time of torture, Himeko set food out on the table for use to eat. I literally cut everyone just so I could get some of the cookies (only cause they were the good kind with a bunch of icing and sprinkles) and multiple, little finger-sandwiches. Once I got what I needed, I scampered back up to my room.

And now I was currently stuffing my face with food and pondering Hidan's odd actions from only moments ago. Well, scratch that, there wasn't even much to ponder, just the fact that he gave me damn butterflies. I shoved a sandwich in my mouth. I guess it was good that he has a reason for treating me like crap, though it didn't justify his behavior, really; oddly, it just made me feel better that he had a reason that didn't revolve around pissing Kakuzu off for the most part, but that it dealt with Jashin. If he was telling me the truth, then, I found it... understandable. "Understandable" may have been an overstatement in the end though.

"Mina-chan!" Konan yelled as she bounds through the door. I looked up at her with stuffed cheeks and she stared at me a bit longer than she needed to; she bursted into a fit of giggles, then continued: "Mina-chan, after you finish, come to the common room, m'kay?" I just nodded, and she walked away. I struggled to swallow and sighed in delight upon the delicacies I was so fortunate to eat. Getting fat was always fun when my anxiety levels were out of whack. After finishing my food, I headed down to the common room to see what Himeko and Konan have planned next. So far, this sleepover was sucking to the max.

"Mina-me-chaaan~!" Tobi squealed as he pounced on me at the foot of the stairs. I almost fainted out of shock; count on Tobi to have scared the living day lights out of me. Tobi squeezed me into his chest and rubbed his cheek against mine lovingly. I put my arms around him, too, and patted his back. The masked man chuckled, "Tobi loves Mina-me-chan, and thinks Mina-me-chan looks very pretty with bows in Mina-me-chan's hair." I grinned and squeezed him another time before he let me go. I tightened the bows and blushed a little, "Love you, too, Tobi-kun... thanks a bunch!" Well, that made me feel a little better!

I stood in the threshold and found everyone gathered around in a circle. I sweatdropped. _What were they up to now...?_ A little beyond them, Hidan stood with his arms crossed, a pissed off expression, too. Himeko stood next to him, smiling. Everyone was watching them, like they were waiting for something to happen. I glanced back up to Hime just as she stood on her tippy toes, grabs Hidan's pale arm and puckered her lips at him. He moved his face out of the way and her kiss landed on his jawline. My eyes widened, and with a teen, teeny, tiny twinge of jealousy, question, "What the fuck, you guys? Are you all drunk?"

Konan turned to me, "'Bout time you got down here! We're playing Spin the Bottle! Hey, Kakuzu, let Mina-chan sit by you, please." Kakuzu glared at her before standing and walking out of the room.

"Did that count, Konan-chan?" Himeko asked.

"Not technically, but I'll be nice and say it did," the blue-haired female replied happily. Hidan grumbled incoherent complaints and sat on the other side of me. I looked to him, watching as he shook his head, and glared at the bottle before us, "I fucking tried to get away..."

"My turn!" Konan squealed. She took the bottle in hand and spun it with a flick of her wrist. The container turned quickly, but eventually slowed and landed on Leader. Well, fuck, that wasn't fair! I was sure they kissed all the time! Leader smiled and she leaned in to kiss him on the lips, which he obliged to casually.

"Okay, Kazue-chan, it's your turn!" Himeko proclaimed. The platinum blonde seemed to waver a bit, not liking the idea, but she nodded and lightly spun the bottle. The bottle landed on her friend Kazuki, and she blushed worse than I thought I ever had. Kazuki leaned in, and Kazue simply pecked her on the cheek, then pulled away and held her legs to her chest in embarrassment. I propped my chin up on my hand and yawned as the game continued... but then...

"Okay, new rule! No more cheek kissing!" Konan said loudly, giggling like a school girl. My eyes widened as I began to protest.

"Mina-chan, your turn to get lucky!" Himeko chimed. _They would make that rule right before it was my turn..._ I sighed heavily and spun the bottle in a jerky motion. The anticipation welling up within me was crazy; my stomach was in knots. _Deidara would love hearing about this, wouldn't he?_ The bottle slowed a bit before stopping. I looked in direction the bottle point.

_Kaito._

"Re-fucking-do!" I flicked the male off, infuriated. Konan and Himeko sweatdropped, and Kaito chuckled in amusement. I took the bottle in hand once more and spun it. When it stops, this time, it lands on our favorite hyperactive brunette, Tobi. I made a noise along the lines of "eep!" and blushed nervously. I hear Hidan yelling, but it sounded blocked out and slurred. Konan and Himeko looked at me and waved their hands to me, telling me to do it. I groaned knowing I'd feel guilty about this later and scooted over by Tobi. I turned to the masked man and he muttered something before pulling his mask up enough to reveal his smooth, pale, smiling lips. I smiled in a small fashion. Think of him... as a brother! I gulped, watching his lips to assure I didn't miss them, and placed mine against his and gave him a little kiss. I pulled away quickly, still blushing deeply and sneered to them through my bangs. _To be honest... his lips were really soft.._. Konan and Himeko gave me a thumbs up and picked out another person to take their turn. I looked to Tobi shyly and flush once more. "S-sorry, T-Tobi-kun..." I muttered. Tobi laughed and whispered, "It's okay, Mina-me-chan, Mina-me-chan did a good job!" I smiled at his reply, wondering if I was his first kiss or not. He definitely was mine.

_..._

_Yeah, I felt the guilt pounding down on my shoulders already._

"Ooh, Himeko-chan, I think the bottle is trying to say something about you and Hidan!" Konan said slyly. I watched as Himeko rolled her eyes dramatically; once more, the bottle had landed on Hidan. I looked at Hidan and find his vision stuck onto Himeko; he appeared defeated. Hell, I'd feel defeated if I were him, too... In the blink of an eye, the self-proclaimed diva pushed Hidan onto his back on the floor and straddled his waist before planting kisses all over his face and neck, and he yelled and cussed in protest. _Oh. Fucking hell. What was wrong with this woman?_ Himeko grabbed his hands and put them around her demandingly. He immediately pulled them away. My jaw dropped lower and lower every time her lips caressed his flesh... My eyes grow wide, and I couldn't figure out why... but this was pissing me off. A weird feeling coils within me as Hidan tried to push the girl off. I gagged upon seeing her lick his face. Konan did a wolf-whistle and laughs loudly. And, though I didn't really know how to explain it, things seemed to just... slow down. The room blurred and shook, and something just snapped inside me. I crawled over to Himeko and pulled her shoulder back lightly; with a giggle, she turned to look at me. She was obviously drunk, and below her, Hidan wiped his face off in a hurry. I clenched my fist, punching her in the mouth quickly. The noise produced seemed to ring throughout the base with repetition. Himeko was knocked back off of Hidan onto the floor, she scrambled to hold her mouth in her hand, tears forming in her aubergine eyes.

"What the hell, Minami-chan?" She yelled. I stood, "You're too fcking drunk for you own good."

"You cunt! I'm a princess, and you of all people should know that by now, God! Don't treat me like that"

Half way through her sentence, I walked out the door only to see Kakuzu sitting on the stairs. He looked up at me, and I glanced at him.

"Are you okay?" He asked. I nodded and continued out the front door while noticing that I should've been like Kakuzu and not have done stupid things...

* * *

As I walked through Konoha, I looked through a large window of a clothing store and observed the clock as it read a little after midnight. Today had gone by _so_ slowly. I looked around a noticed that were are still people walking to and fro upon the streets. Lights in lanterns revealed the pathways. I followed the dirt road till it eventually veered off, away from the village into the darkness. I stumbled along regardless coming upon what appeared to be a graveyard. I pursed my lips; normally, I was the type that got all freaked out by graveyards... but there was something in the air about this place that gave off feeling of warmth and comfort. I caressed the headstones and tried to outline the letters engraved into each slab of rock, coming up with nothing in the end. I touched each as I passed by them.

"What brings you here, stranger?" I heard someone ask. I spun on my heel to see a shadowed figure. I put my fists up, seeing as how I forgot my kunai, naturally. "It depends on who's asking."

"Hatake, Kakashi, jounin of Konoha," the male replied. I dropped my hands to my sides, "Would it be alright if we walked back near the village? I can't see a thing..."

"My name is Mina, and I'm just visiting the graves to answer you." The man, Kakashi nodded and he and I leisurely walked into the dim light of the city. I smiled and sighed, "That's a lot better... sorry if this is an inconvenience for you or anything."

"Not at all. If so, I wouldn't have bothered to walk back up here," he replied plainly. Well, honesty was always good... I sweatdropped, "Heh, right! So, you're a jounin you say?"

"That's correct," he said while pulling out a book and reading it quickly, "What rank might you be at?"

"I'm a chuunin," I said. _That was a lie, in my village, I wouldd also be classified as a jounin... whatever._

"I see, whe-"

"Ooh, what're you reading?" I asked while trying to look at the cover.

"It's called Icha Icha Tactics," he said, "It probably isn't suited for your age."

"Oh, _really?_ What age would it be appropriate to read it then?" I questioned excitedly, officially determined to find out what the book was about.

"Hmm... At least seventeen. As it claims on the back, it's for mature audiences." He showed me the back of the book. I laughed loudly and he simply glanced up from reading.

"I'm eighteen, lemme see it!" I exclaimed and flail my arms while trying to grab the book. He put his hand on my shoulder to keep me from getting it, "You aren't eighteen."

"How would you know? Are you a stalker...?" I asked in a whisper. His visible eye widened, "No!"

"I'm eighteen. Trust me. And if that's a book of smut, it's nothing new to me. I read it all the time," I explained, referring to the hentai I carried around with me in my backpack. He sighed and marked his place in the book before letting me read it some. I giggled lightly after scanning over the description on the back of the book, "That looks really good... where can I buy it?"

"There's a book store around here... it's a bit complicated, the directions are... Eh, I'll show you there sometime, okay?" He asked.

"Sounds great! I'm going to be here tomorrow to go for ramen with Naruto, if you know him, at one, so we could go after that?"

"That should be okay. Good to meet you, Mina-san," he said, while making a hand sign, "Till then." I watched happily as he disappeared before my eyes, leaves gracefully twirling behind

I sighed and turned to start walking back to the base. Maybe it was good we're so close to Konoha after all. Himeko had been pissing me off, and I could just leave the base and hang out with people up here. Yeah, I already had acquaintances, and they take my mind off of things. I gazed up to the night sky. A full moon watched the night life scurry along back and forth beneath it; the stars looked mesmerizing. _When I got back, I guess I'd just have to tell Hime-chan that I was pmsing, otherwise, she'd expect me to give her a detailed explanation. That'd work._ Moments after passing through the Leaf Village gates, I arrived at the base. Upon walking in, no one was in sight within the main room. The stair case twirled upward delicately, all the lights were off, and it was quiet. I walked into the kitchen and heard the dish washer running and buzzing. _They bought **dishes?** Really? Did they even budget their money?_ Upon inspection of the common room, I found everyone gathered around a t.v., rather than a bottle, this time. It was a pretty low-quality t.v., and it was pretty small, but it did the job. Himeko turned around after hearing me walk in and said nothing.

"Mina-me-chan is back! Sit over here!" Tobi yelled as he waves me to him. I shook my head, "I'll join you in a minute, Tobi-kun." I paced back to my room and dropped onto the inflatable chair. _The air of this place was... dull. I wouldd rather go back to Konoha, really._ I stretched like a cat and yawned before grabbing my backpack and pulling out my book of hentai. Kakashi had started something. Once I began reading this stuff, it was like I couldn't stop. Well, it was like sex itself, reading smut and such- you couldn't just stop half way! I grimaced at my thoughts and rolled my eyes at myself before continuing on with my reading. It wasn't five minutes before a knock reverberated through the room. I jumped and tossed the book in my backpack and closed it. The door opened and revealed Hidan, once more. I cheesed at him as he stole the same spot he sat in earlier. I propped myself on my hands and leaned forward and he did the same. It baffles me as to why he refrained from wearing shirts... not that I minded, but where was his decency?

"I have to ask why you knocked the shit out of Himeko, Mina-chan," Hidan declared.

"Did you want her to suck your face off?" I questioned in disgust. He frantically shook his head no and glared at me, "No _fucking_ way! I'm glad you did something, I'm just wondering!"

"Well, that's why," I replied, sighing and shrugging off the real reason, "I'm considerate of your feelings. Too bad you don't care about mine."

"Were you jealous?" He asked quietly and tilted his head. _Fuck! _I blushed, "No! Why would I be?" Hidan rolled forward onto his knees and grabbed my wrists lightly, leaning further towards me, "Honestly? I won't tell anyone, I swear to Jashin."

I grumbled in a fluster, "Umm... Maybe just a little... but it shouldn't matter anyway because I can't control who you kiss or anything; I really had no authority in hitting her." Hidan smiled and I almost felt myself shrink beneath him as he pulled me toward him softly till I was on my knees also. I gulped loudly, waiting for him to push me onto my back or something sadistic like that, but he simply held me to himself. I hugged him back and rested my head on his chest. Hidan released me and sat criss-cross. I blinked at him, confused, and he took hold of my hand, urging me forward to him. I inched forward and he grabbed my waist to carefully set me down where I'm in the same position Himeko had been in. My hands began to shake as Hidan took both of them and placed them around his neck. The butterflies returned once more as he moved my hips downward to where they met his own, and he whispered: "You don't have to be jealous, Mina-chan." I laughed a little and mentally yelled at myself: "_THIS ALL STARTED 'CAUSE YOU GOT JEALOUS OF HIMEKO AND FUCKING BUSTED HER IN THE NOSE."_

"Mina-chan," Hidan started, staring me straight in the eyes. I listened as my breathing was thrown off. I thought, again, about walking out the door, but I just couldn't do it; there was something about those eyes... those beautifully glowing eyes that seemed to look at me differently than at any one of thing else. I could see that mouth which, for once, wasn't curled into a smart ass smile.

Suddenly, my door was beaten on by only God knows who.

I silently cursed myself for never being able to have good things. I looked to Hidan to see his own shocked expression and scrambled to get up, and shoved him into my inflatable chair. I fixed my hair before opening my backpack and throwing him my book of yaoi, rather than my hentai, so he could act like he'd been reading. I opened the door and stared blankly as Tobi flailed crazily, "Mina-me-chan~! Konan told Tobi to get Mina-me-chan and Hidan-senpai so everyone can watch scary movies!" I nodded and told him we'd be down in a moment, and he jogged down the hall. I shut the door and walked to Hidan. He looked up at me from the book and laughs obnoxiously, "You actually like this shit?" I happily verified that and laughed myself. I took the book and threw it down before holding my hands out to help him up. Hidan took my hands and followed me as I walked towards the door.

_That situation was deliciously tempting, but I survived it with my virginity intact!_

* * *

Konan and Himeko, after Hidan and I made appearance, put a "scary" movie in for everyone to watch. No movie scared me, so they shouldn't have been called a "scary" movies. They pop the Saw Trilogy in, and I literally fall asleep on the floor, it's so boring. I didn't mind though, after all that happened today, I needed something to put me to sleep.

It was morning not long after. I opened my eyes and groaned at the crick in my neck. I sat up to find a blanket thrown across me and set it to the side and look back to find Tobi sprawled out across the floor. Apparently, he'd been the painful pillow that pretty much misaligned my neck. I grinned sweetly and find new appreciation for Tobi's natural generosity. I stood and stretched while walking into the kitchen where I foud empty bowls and plates galore scattered all over the counters.

"W-what the hell!" I yelled. Kaito popped into my view, "Sorry, ate the rest." I sneered at him and trudged through the door upstairs. As I passed by each door, I found everyone in each of the rooms. Well, at least I knew where all these heathens were holed up. I walked into the room I that I saw Hidan in and watched as he scrawled something down on paper. I giggleed, "Mornin'." Hidan looked up, then wrote something else before storing the paper beneath his bed and sighed at me. "Well, morning, Mina-chan." I walked over to his bed and laid by him on it, "There's no food left downstairs..."

"Well... it is noon. Tobi saw you were still asleep a little while ago, and he said he'd be your pillow and just layed on the floor like an idiot 'cause he said you were uncomfortable..." He yawned.

"_NOON?__ WHAT THE FUCK?" _I almost screamed. I rolled over on my side away from him. I could feel the weird look he was giving me. "What's up with you?"

"I'm supposed to meet the jinchuuriki at one... well, there's no use in going, I should just go back to sleep and never wake up," I grumbled. Hidan got on his hands and knees over me and pokes my side, then the other and I laughed and smacked his hands away. It wasn't long though before I the life was being tickled out of me. I yelled and kicked, but it led to no avail.

"I have to get ready to leave! Get off!" He hopped off and stuck his tongue out at me, walking from the room.

* * *

I took a shower and brushed my hair and teeth, floss and such, successfully achieving all my daily hygiene chores. Just for the heck of it, I tied my hair up in the two bows Konan gave me before. Instead of wearing the rather skimpy corset dress Hidan picked out for me, I grabbed the red and white dress, threw it on and the cardigan, too. I, of course wore my zori, snapped my kunai holster on, and got my backpack. I assured that I had money for the ramen and the book I was supposed to get and skip out the door, trying to hurry.

Upon arrival in Konoha, I nodded to the gate guards, and stopped to glance around for my accomplice.

"Oi, Mina-san!" I jerked my head to the left; a smile decorated my face and I waved to Naruto.

"You're early, too! Well, I guess we should head to Ichiraku's, hmm?" He said loudly. I agreed and he walked by my side, showing me around.

"Okay, so that's the scroll shop over there; it doesn't sell books, remember that. I used to always think it was a normal bookstore, but... heheh, it's not... Then, that! That's my apartment, and if you turn right down there to the right, you can find a stretch of amazing restaurants... and! There's a bakery that's simply to die for~!" He exclaimed. I laughed, "I'm not too big on fancy restaurants; I'd prefer to be traveling."

"See, I'm the opposite," he remarked, "But opposites attract, we're gonna be great finds, don't'cha think?" I grinned largely and he pulled my wrist, guiding me to a little shop.

"This is the place!" Naruto said happily while throwing an arm out to the presentation. _Well, it smelled pretty good..._

"Hey, Naruto!" An elder man called from behind the counter, "Good to see you again. Who's this? Did ya catch yourself a girlfriend?" I blushed and glared at the ground, dragging my feet in little circles. This boy was probably way too young to be my boyfriend.

"Nah, just a new friend. Old man Teuchi, this is Minami," Naruto replied. I waved to him and Naruto added on, "She's never had ramen!"

"Oh, really?" The man questioned in surprise, "Well, let's get to cookin' something good up for your first, Mina-san." I couldn't really think of anything else to do but smile. Naruto pushed me onto a seat and he sat by me happily before ordering for himself and me, too. The old man began cooking, and Naruto inhaled the musty smelling air as if it was the best scent in the world. I didn't oblige to that statement...

"Say, Mina-san, where's your friend?" The blonde questioned randomly. I sweatdropped, "Oh, uhh, he's really sick... he has a high temperature."

"Ah, I see! Maybe sometime I can drop by and visit 'em!" He proposed. In return, I shrugged and shook off the subject, "How much will this all cost, Naruto-san...?"

"Eh, it's on me, don't worry about it!" He yelled and patted my shoulder with a huge smile. _He smiled so much... why the heck was he that damn happy?_

"Th-thanks!" He simply nodded and looked around like a ditz; I pursed my lips, thinking for a conversation starter, "So, what's life like here in Konoha?"

"It's per-retty darn good. It's more relaxed for the most part, but sometimes, seeing as how this place is so big, things break out and yada, yada, yada..."

"Heh! Like what?"

"Well... a couple of years back, my friend Sasuke ran away from the village," he trailed off quietly. _Sasuke!_ I mouthed an "o," and grimaced, "I've heard of him."

"Really? What've you heard, Mina-san?" He pried loudly. I blinked with wide eyes, "Not that much, just about his history and such... why'd he leave?"

_"Mina-chan, return back to the base at once," _Leader called. Him and his fucking mind jutsu... Naruto's voice softened further, "I don't know... but I've vowed to bring him back one day..." I forced myself to smile reassuringly, "You will with that kinda attitude, Naruto-san."

_"Mina! Don't ignore me! I know you hear me!"_

"Here you two are," Teuchi said while placing the bowls before us. I grabbed chopsticks and watch as he automatically digs in. I cautiously took a bite and Naruto looked to me while slurping the soup of the noodles from his bowl. "How is it?" I couldn't explain it. It was as if somehow these simple noodles began exploding inside my mouth like fireworks. I mimicked his motion and began slurping the bowl down. Naruto shrugged with a grin, "Heheheh, told ya you'd like it."

* * *

"Thanks, Naruto-san~! That was so great. I'll be coming back here for more soon, that's for sure!" I said, "Thank you, Teuchi-san!" Naruto rambled on about something as we exited the little stand. He stopped and turns to me, "I'll come with you whenever! This is the best place to go anytime of the day! Breakfast even!"

"Good then! I'm not sure when, but I'll tell you, definitely!"

"Alright, well, I gotta run. Granny Tsunade wanted to see me." I furrowed my brows, "Who?"

"The Hokage, duh!" He laughed mockingly and gave me a rushed, one-armed hug, "Catch ya later, Mina-san!" And with that, he ran off, up the street to the Hokage's residence. _What an odd boy._

"I see you've met Naruto, Mina-san." I turned to find Kakashi at my side reading his favored book, Icha Icha Paradise. I greeted him and he showed me to the bookstore with ease. Once I'd bought my copy, we both began walking back towards the gates with our noses in our books. I giggled, "We must look like twins doing this." He lightly shook his head in response at my naive remark. I closed my book after a moment and look to him, "What do you know about Uchiha Sasuke?"

"What don't I know? I was his sensei," he replied matter-of-factly. I cocked a brow, "Really? Hmm, well, why did he leave this village? This place is nice, I don't see why he would..."

"He's revenge-driven as he searches for sources of attainable power to simply destroy his brother." Kakashi sighed and met my gaze, "Naruto is his rival, that's obvious... but he thinks of Sasuke as his best friend also. It's a bit complicated, really."

"I see... well, since we're here, I'll take my leave. Thank you a bunch, Kakashi-san!"

"Not a problem for a fellow Icha Icha-lover. Be safe and farewell," he replied, waving with a stiff hand. I waved back and sprinted through the village gates back to the base to see what the hell Leader needed.

* * *

Leader scanned each of our faces as we watched him, waiting to hear what the ruckus us all about. Apparently, Leader called everyone into one room for something.

"Everyone, we're buckling down on the hunt for the bijuu. Hidan, Kakuzu, you're to find the two-tailed demon cat. Konan and I will be searching for the three-tailed giant turtle. Kazue, Kaito, you two are to look for the one-tailed Shukaku. Kazuki, Megumi- the five-tailed best. On another note, We've located Sasuke; Mina-chan, I'm counting on you and Tobi to recruit him." I raised a brow. _Me and... Tobi? I didn't have a problem with that, but it just sounded odd._

"Now, he's been spotted nearby the gates, you're to leave at once. Good luck," he said and waved us away as if we were huge burdens, "Everyone else, the location of..." I shrugged and followed Tobi as he jogs out the door.

Tree...

After tree...

After tree...

After tree...

After tree...

After tree. That was all there was out here. Trees. It was fucking annoying, this stupid forest; there was no telling how many times I'd tripped because of the vegetation. I hopped from branch to branch behind Tobi as he scouted the area, while I barely even managed to stay behind him. Tobi made a sharp turn and I nearly ran straight into the trunk of a tree, barely dodging it.

"T-Tobi-kun?" I scratched the back of my head.

"Yes, Mina-me-chan?" He called, stopping. I stopped also and huffed, "Is there any way we can slow down a bit...?"

"Tobi is sorry, Mina-me-chan, but Tobi and Mina-me-chan can't afford to lose Sasuke. Sasuke's a slippery one!" He replied before grasping his hips. Groaning, I nodded. Tobi simply looked to me before crossing his arms. "I'm a bit worried for you, Mina-chan," he stated under his breath. My ears perked at his sentence because of the actual content and because he was talking normally, both. "W-why, Tobi-kun?"

"Your infatuation towards Deidara is trivial," he remarked. I threw him a quirky glance, and I heard a chuckle escape him. He sighed, "Deidara isn't exactly... in his right mind." My stomach churning, and I bite the inside of my cheek, "I don't really have an 'infatuation,' it's... nothing. What're you talking about though?"

"He's not medically sane," he said, "Just be careful." The masked man gripped my wrist and held a hand sign before we teleported into an odd room. I looked around at the red-tinted walls and shrunk a bit at the intimidating appearance of the candle-lit room.

"Why are we here, Tobi-kun?" I questioned quietly. Tobi turned to me, "Make yourself comfortable, I'm retrieving Sasuke myself. I'll be back shortly." He put his hand on my head and ruffled my hair before walking over to a dresser where he scanned through papers. He looked at me, and I jumped upon seeing the Sharingan piercing me through the opening of his mask. _He... he was an Uchiha?_ He chuckled and stalked to my side once more.

"You're different from anyone I've met, Mina-chan," he stated. I blushed and twirled my hair nervously, "In a good way, right?"

"Of course. You put up with Tobi, yet you're strong when you think it's necessary; that, and you're a key to many things," he replied. _Okay, it was official that I was confused. He said the sentence as if he was not Tobi... but that was also how he usually talked... so what did he mean? _He took the two bows out of my hair and messed with my hair till it looked straight and sleek, then he tied it into a bun atop my head and put the ribbons around it.

"You should keep your hair out of your face." He stopped before me and crossed his arms, "Well, you're probably wondering why Leader sent you on a mission with me, of all people, correct?" I nodded lightly and sat down in a nearby chair. He stepped back into the darkness, away from the candles and removed his mask to reveal the Sharingan once more.

"You're needed in the plan for what may lead to a cataclysm."

"C-cataclysm...?"

* * *

God, I finally finished it. I dunno why, but this chapter was hard for me to write. I kept going back and changing things, then re-changing them and reworded _everything..._ I thought I knew what all was going to happen, but I ended up surprising myself...  
Also! I have a poll up on my page. Vote! If you say yes, tell me what character (preferably Hidan or Deidara. Just 'cause.) It may change the fate of the ending of this story.  
As for now, I gotta go and figure out what all is gonna happen in _chapter twelve!_ ^3^  
Sorry that the author notes are so long... Anyway, till next time!

*Remember to vote in the poll! Please and thankies!*


	12. Secrets, Cookies, and Suggestive Hopes

Hey, guys! I have chapter twelve~!  
Just a quick little note here, I broke my foot... Hence, I will have decent time to write! Awesome, huh? XD;  
**And in this chapter, I'd like to bring to attention as a reminder:** Tobi's unmasked face looks different from what the manga showed (there're details, of course).  
AND, no, this does not follow the original storyline (it _is_ fanfiction after all). If I followed the storyline, where would my creation be? x3 No offense to those who use the original storyline, it's just not my thing.  
Thanks to those who voted in my poll! The results have been settled! Hopefully you'll like how everything turns out. ^^  
NOTE: Towards the end, there is explicit romance and such. But not a whooole bunch.  
Anyway, on with the show!

Enjoy! c:

* * *

"Wait, let me get this right..." I brushed my bangs to the side of my face, annoyed with them, and placed my hand over my mouth thoughtfully. "If all goes accordingly to plans, destruction will fall upon Konoha?"

"All in all." Tobi chuckled lowly and within the silhouette of the darkness, I could see him cross his cloth-clad arms as he pushed of the wall he leaned on to approach me.

"That's always been the objective behind the Akatsuki, but upon destruction, peace surely comes... Of course, each member has their personal reasoning to join the organization, but, regardless, they contribute to the cause... that's the agreement- the contract they sign when joining. They always contribute."

"Tobi-kun... you've been calling the shots, haven't you?" My jaw dropped a little after hearing myself question that. _What the fucking hell was I saying? There was no goddamn way._ He released a sound of surprise, "What a smart girl you are." Oh_. _Within the candlelight, he stepped forward to me slowly, scanning my eyes. His mask in hand, he glanced at it, then cocked an eyebrow at me with a realizing smile. "This is your first time seeing my face, huh?" I blinked in a bit of confusion when he kept nearing me, then squatted before my spot in my little chair. I couldn't do anything but gaze at him- his face, more so. His face, it was so... it appeared timeless. His face was so pure, smooth, and pale, crinkled into a grin; his shaggy hair caressed his face lightly, his bangs falling into his eyes a bit. Those eyes were so piercing, his vision bore into me with Sharingan the color of crimson blood. I bit my lip and blushed. He was damn adorable, and_ I kissed him!_

_Wait, he was Tobi? This... this was..._

Tobi emitted a laugh and stands before turning away, "You seem a bit surprised."

_Fucking weird..._

"Well, damn straight! I've never seen your face before!" I squeaked in reply. Tobi deadpanned, "I figured you'd pay more attention to the fact I'm the leader of Akatsuki rather than my face..." I giggled nervously. I'd never really been concerned with the Akatsuki anyways, I kinda just... joined to get away from my village and the people in it. The leader of Akatsuki was Tobi, woop-dee-do.

"Alike a healed blind man revealed to the brilliant colors of the world..." He mused quietly, then laughed again, "Do you think I'm 'cute~?'" The only thing I really heard was how Tobi stretched the word "cute" in a little, sing-song voice. It took me a minute to register his question, but once I did, I deeply blushed and waved my arms like a crazy person, "Wh-what kinda question is that? Tobi!"

"Wow... I was only kidding, Mina-chan!" Tobi turned to me with a surprised expression. He put his orange mask down nearby, pacing the floors by me a bit. I facepalmed in defeat. "T-Tobi-kun!" He held a hand out to me, and I hesitantly grabbed it. The male pulled me to my feet, "You think I'm cute, huh? Well," Tobi pulled me forward and lightly brushed his lips against my own.

"Mutual feelings, Mina-chan. That aside, I have go finish our mission, and..." Tobi kept talking, but I blocked it out to touch my lips in surprise while being unable to think of anything to say. I stumbled back a bit, feeling kind of sick and realized that I was actually perspiring. I gripped my stomach, feeling butterflies formulate as the room seems to spin and grow darker and dimmer.

"Mina-chan?" I looked to Tobi dazedly; I felt so lightheaded...

"Mina-chan!" And everything went black.

* * *

When I awaked, I was laying in a bed. My eyes fluttered as I tried to see in the dim lighting. I could hear multiple voices, but they were hard to discern.

"So, it's settled then." _That voice was Tobi's, I knew._ "We'll leave in a moment."

"Why wait?" A flat voice questioned. _But I had no clue who that was..._

"My partner is feeling ill." _That was a good way to cover it up... wait! I seriously fainted because he kissed me?_ I sighed lowly at my pathetic self._ How ridiculous!_

I listened and upon hearing footsteps, I sat up a bit while rubbing my eyes. Suddenly, the light switch was flipped upward, and I automatically squeaked at the immense lighting. I flinched and blinked repeatedly, trying to rid myself of the spots I was seeing. A hand rested upon my shoulder, and I looked to the source.

"Good to see you're awake, Mina-chan, there are people I'd like for you to meet," Tobi said happily. I hopped out of bed and thanked him for letting me rest.

"Sasuke and company, this is Minami," Tobi stated for me. I smiled shyly in small fashion as they greeted me lazily.

"I'm Hozuki, Suigetsu."

"Just call me Karin."

"My name is Juugo."

"Uchiha, Sasuke." _That was him? Nice hair, bro._

"Nice to meet you all," I replied quietly, feeling my cheeks light a fire. The boy, Suigetsu, chuckled at me. He sipped on a drink in hand and I realized how dehydrated I was. _Damn, did he carry that big sword everywhere?_ Karin's vision didn't leave Sasuke for a moment. Maybe when she sneered at me, but other than that, not so much. Her agonizingly bright, red hair was chopped in odd shaping and I wondered who did her hair... Juugo seemed like the gentle beast type of guy. I didn't know, maybe that was just me... and then there was Sasuke. The runaway, the avenger; his aura seemed cold. There was just something about him that I found hard to trust, but what the hell did my instincts know?

"Well, Mina-chan, mission accomplished. What do you all say we head to the base?" We all nodded and left the room, venturing to reunite with the others.

* * *

Tobi told us that we would be gathering once everyone got back to the base from their jinchuuriki missions. After that, he told Sasuke's group to make themselves at home... It was a damn good thing that Leader got a mansion this big! I would've been severely pissed if I had to share a room with anyone, especially that Karin chick. I muttered under my breath while shifting in my blow up chair to get comfy. I pulled out Icha Icha Paradise and sighed in contentment. But of course, everything good came to an end.

"Say, Mina-san! What'cha readin'?" Suigetsu bellowed as he bounded into my room, his sword in hand. He waved his arms around while blabbering senselessly about something I didn't hear- rather I covered my head. "What the fucking hell? Don't swing that thing around in here!" His arms flopped to his sides limply while listening to me and his sword embedded itself in my floor, making a large hole in the ground. I hissed at him and he grinned sheepishly.

"OUT." I yelled, pointing to the door, spirit feral. He ran out, then appears before me again, his sword absent. He plopped down in front of me on the ground. The blue-haired boy held his ankles, feet together while his expression twisted into curiosity as he craned his neck to observe the cover of my book. Annoyed, I pulled the book away and walked out of the room.

"Damn, what're you trying to hide?" He asked while following behind me, "Is it... smut?" _He asked that as a joke, too..._

"Yes, actually, and it's not suitable for your age. Besides, you have a guy's mind; you don't need porn to get a boner."

"I'm sixteen, I can read that stuff! I'm sure you aren't old enough either! Why're you even reading it anyway...?" He protested. I laughed obnoxiously, "Yeah. I'm eighteen. Seventeen is the age required." I ignored his latter question.

"My birthday is coming up in February!"

"Exactly. You aren't old enough. February is in five months."

"Well, you're barely old enough!"

"My birthday is next month, then I'll be nineteen." _Oh, shit! I forgot my birthday was coming up... I forgot it was even September..._

"That's not fair!"

"It most certainly is."

"Not!"

He followed me as I rounded a corner and walked into a room, slamming the door on him. By the sound of it, he ran into the door. _What a dunce..._

"It's nice to see you annoying someone other than me for once!" I heard Karin yelling on the other side of the door. Suigetsu stomped in return, "You wanna fucking go?"

"You're trying to threaten me?"

"Hell yeah, bitch!" It then grew quiet and I guessed that they went away. I sighed and looked up to find Sasuke staring at me. I blink awkwardly, "Sorry, Sasuke-san." He didn't move, just watched as I disappeared out of his room. Suigetsu saw me and ran to my side. He smiled innocently, then tried to take my book. I growled at him and shoved the book down the front of my dress into my bra. "Are you fucking happy now? Jashin..." I looked away angrily, but my anger flared into ferocity when I caught him still looking after the book... which was between my boobs...

"You fucking pervert!" I punched him in the cheek and watched at his face dispersed into water, then regenerated into his normal form, unharmed.

"What the hell? I MUST BURN IT WITH FIRE!" I yelled while running down the hall and stairs, running face first, smack right into Tobi. I stared at him in embarrassment, and he simply looked at me through his mask.

"Umm... Mina-chan, I think you have something between-"

"I fucking know! Stop!" I charged passed him and ran through the kitchen into the common room. I purposely faceplanted onto the couch and sighed into the cushion loudly. I grab bedmy book and sat up to read it while I could. The silence was beautiful... and this book was beyond amazing. Just when the main character Daichi-kun was about to undress his love, Ai-chan, my stomach tightened and my abdomen tingled. I flipped to the next page quickly and scanned a sentence within one of the many paragraphs. Upon feeling a nosebleed coming on, I gripped my face and giggled. _THE DETAIL!_

"What the... fuck?" Suigetsu asked in awe. I figurativelly jumped out of my skin and blushed crazily when I saw Suigetsu reading the book over my shoulder. I smacked him in the face with the book and scampered back upstairs. I hid the book in my things and ran to the bathroom while flailing around stupidly.

"Okay... it's official that I don't like having Suigetsu here," I muttered to myself. I stood before the mirror above the sink and looked at myself. I fiddled with my hair and smiled sweetly. But then the thought of the scenario I was reading in Icha Icha Paradise came to mind. _I wondered if Ai would reject him... they just started all their foreplay stuff, so she could easily just be, like, "LOLWHAT. No thanks. You're a whore." And then Daichi would be so heartbroken... But if sex was as great as people portrayed, she wouldn't say no... though the book did state she had interests in another guy. It made me wonder sometimes._

I took my dress strap in hand. _What if I was like Ai and Hidan was Daichi? WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK? Did I seriously just think of having sex with Hidan? _My eyes widened upon my thoughts. _I really just wondered what sex would be like with Hidan! Jashin, what is wrong with me? I'm alike Ai, now... a ho for all I was worth! _I shook my head ashamedly with myself. _I only wondered that because I'd been hanging around him a lot... that had to be it._

I sighed and walked to my room. I blatantly needed sleep. I closed my door and laid sideways in my little blow up chair to try to take a nap. I didn't bother trying to read because I knew Suigetsu would end up coming in and trying to find my books, so I may've as well left them hidden. I removed my zori, and with a yawn, I closed my eyes to effectively catch up on needed sleep.

* * *

I looked over to find Hidan as he smiled sweetly. He was shirtless of course, wearing only pants and his Jashinist pendant. It hung around his neck proudly, glistening in the lighting.

"Morning, sleepy head," he said. I blushed upon hearing him call me that; that was a new one.

"Good morning! I'm guessing you and Kakuzu finished your mission easily?"

"Sure did. Then we had to catch up on the money whore's bounty hunting..."

"Well, you're back, so it doesn't matter, does it?" He sent me a condescending look and I giggled. Hidan didn't care if he was through with it- he had to get off his lazy ass and exert himself, and that was all that registered in his thick head. I sat up to stretch dramatically and squeaked in satisfaction upon hearing my joints pop. He was in his usual spot in front of my chair, leaning on his hand in a bored demeanor. I flushed noticing that my dress had apparently come unbuttoned a bit. I tred to nonchalantly button it up, but he gingerly caught my hand and his sweet smile turned into an odd smirk that made shivers rack through my body. His chuckle made me even more nervous, and I could feel inside what he was thinking.

"Don't, Mina-chan... you look sexy." He motioned me toward him and I shyly did so. He pulls me into his lap as he had done yesterday and held my chin in his hand lovingly. With his other hand, he gripped my hip a bit. He pulled me forward and kissed me roughly. It was a kiss that had me reeling and I obliged to it hastily. I pushed my hips onto his and heard him release a low, sexy groan. His lips left mine to my cheek then my jawline and neck. My skin grew heated and I felt myself reacting to his body. A pulsing need coiled within me and it was so tantalizingly tempting... His hands wandered my body and periodically rested on me in various spots.

_Knock, knock, knock._

I sighed in annoyance and Hidan just kept kissing and nipping at my collarbone.

_Knock, knock, knock._

I stood up and opened the door to find Tobi. "Mina-me-chan! Meeting time!" I muffled a response and he sprinted away. I turned to Hidan and kneeled in front of him. He watched, mused, and I rubbed my hand along the zipper area of his pants. He growled a bit, and I motioned downwards, "Do you see this?"

"Fuck, yes, I do..." I laughed and hopped to my feet, "That's the present I'm leaving you with! Tiempo de reunión; es fiesta, ¿verdad? Adios, amigo! Arriba~!"

As if on cue, odd music began playing in the background as I skipped through over the door's threshold, Hidan facepalming. Sounds of an audience clapping was heard and whistles echo through my surroundings.

I opened my eyes in a fluster and gasped a bit.

"What the fuck kinda dream was that?" I yelled to myself loudly, then muttered, "The ending was random bullshit..." I looked around hastily to find myself alone. No Hidan. I checked to see if my book was gone. It was there. Everything was normal, apparently. I scurried to my feet, but upon catching something in the corner of my eye, I backed up to the hole Suigetsu had made in my floor. I peeked through to see Leader and Konan as they devour each other's face. I had no clue my room was over one theirs! An awkward noise was released from Konan; deciding it was time for me to leave, my eyes widen while I crawled to the door before sitting in the hall. I groaned unhappily at the feeling I still had from that dream. I was actually hot and the wetness in my panties makes me shiver in utter embarrassment. First, Icha Icha Paradise. Second, my dream. Third, Konan and Leader.

_Goddamn, too much sex!_ I stood and paced down the hall and stairs to see Karin and Suigetsu in each other's faces. I stared in horror and run into the kitchen yelling: "Just quit! Jashin, you're all whores!" Karin crossed her arms, "She was referring to you, retard."

"Bullshit! You're running around in those _'shorts'-_ more like _undies_! They're that fucking short!" Suigetsu retorted, pointing at her attire.

"We were fighting because you started something and got in my face. Your fault," Karin concluded.

I glanced around before sighing at my behavior. "Good grief..."

"Mina-chan?" I flinched at the sudden voice and looked up. Tobi towered over me in stature. I simply looked at him and gave him a little smile, "Hey, Tobi-kun~!" I waved curtly.

"Have you been okay?"

"Yep."

I could feel the skeptical gaze he was giving me, but I kept my joyful expression. He laughed, "If you're sure..."

"Tobi-kun? Why do you always wear a mask?" I questioned quietly. Tobi lifted his mask a bit, "Form of habit, I suppose. Why? Would you rather me not, so you can see my 'cuuute' face?" Blood rush to my cheeks as I shoved his arm shyly. _Maybe... _"No, I was just wondering!" Tobi took his mask off to reveal his friggin' adorable face. I struggled to not glomp him like a stupid, little fangirl.

"Happy, O Needy One?" He put his mask back on.

"I AM NOT NEEDY! I could've lasted my whole life without seeing your damn face!" I yelled, beginning to walk around him. He grabbed my arm, "Nah, eventually, it would've bothered you so much that you'd simply 'have' to see my face."

"Nuh-uh!" I tried to shake his grip on me off, and he just watched me, mused. Tobi grinned, "Nooo, Mina-chan can't leave, 'cause we're making cookies first." I stopped struggling to send him a curious glance. "Really?"

"Yeah, sure." He shrugged as if he hadn't planned on doing so. Automatically, all of my troubles disappeared as he grabs a container of cookie dough from the fridge.

* * *

"Suigetsu! What the hell are you listening to?" I bellowed angrily. _Mooore sex references- today had sucked as hard as a cheap whore. And that was another sex reference. DAMN._

"Some show called 'The Twenty Sexiest Video Countdown!'" He yelled just as loudly. I mumbled under my breath, and popped my and Tobi's tray of cookies into the oven. He set the timer and held up a hand. I grinned and go to give him a super awesome high-five, but he pulled it away before I slapped his hand...

"Psyche!" ...causing me to high-five the three-hundred-degree-heated oven. I squeaked and yanked my hand away before running cold water over it. I glared daggers at Tobi, "You fucking jerk!" Tobi stuttered and grew silent before hugging me from behind, "I'm sorry, Mina-chan! Do you have enough love and care in your beautiful, little heart to forgive me?"

"Oh, I'm not so sure, Tobi-kun," I joked. I laughed wryly and huffed.

"Good, 'cause if not, I'd have to punish ya."

"What the fuck?" I asked and laughed even harder. His tone was unfazed, "I'm serious."

"Then I don't forgive you!" I stuck out my tongue tauntingly. He removed his mask and looked around, then to me. "Oh, really?" I nodded with a smug expression. _Like he was really gonna do anything._ Tobi pulled me into a tight embrace and I hesitantly placed my arms around him, too. This was punishment...? I emitted a squeak upon feeling his lips caressed my skin. They moved from my jawline, then to my neck sluggishly. He took my flesh between his teeth, nipping at me. I blushed and bury my head into his neck; I silently gasped, the tingly feeling coming back. And quickly as he held me, he slipped out of my arms, booty-bumped me and high-tailed out of the room, his mask in hand.

"That's it? You suck at torture!" I yelled, chasing after him. He looked back to see me following and continued through the doorway by the spiral staircase, down that hall, and around a corner. He disappeared when turning the corner and I slowed down to check each room. I made my way to the last door.

"Miiina!" I flinched so hard that I lost one of my nine lives. He held my waist to himself and carried me into the room, kicking the door shut. Tobi threw me onto his mattress along side his mask. _Oh... This time, instead of sex, it was rape... This was wholly another level of badness! _He flipped his hair out of his face and stretched before simply laying by me. Blankly, I watched as he yawned. He sat up quickly then got in my face. I blushed and backed up a bit and he found my shy act amusing.

"Can you keep secrets?" Tobi asked.

"Heh! I'm the best secret keeper there is," I snickered pridefully.

"Good, then, keep this secret. My name is really Madara." He tapped his lip thoughtfully, "You know I'm the real leader... and, well, that's all that's really secret about me. Act like you don't know... if you don't, I'll be forced to kill you."

"R-really?" I questioned.

"I was serious last time, wasn't I?" _True..._ I nodded, "I'll keep it secret, of course! Don't worry, Madara-kun!"

"You say my name weird..."

"What? No, I don't!" I protested. How did anyone even manage to say his name wrong...?

"Yes. You really do." Tobi, who was still in my face, awkwardly enough, grabbed my waist and tickled my skin with his thumb lightly while pressing his nose to my own, "I like it though..." A few minutes passed as we simply lie there, staring at the ceiling.

"S-shit! The cookies are gonna burn!" I yelled and sprinted out the room. Tobi sighed and chuckled before replacing his mask.

"Just in time! Mina-chaaaan to the rescue!" I pulled an oven mitt on- being smart this time- and set the cookies out to cool. They were classic chocolate chip, my and Madara's favorite by far. I inhaled taking the sweet scent in. I loved cookies just about as much as ice cream, which was easily my favorite treat. And cake, too, of course!

"They're done?" Madara asked. I sang cheerfully in reply and checked the clock hanging upon a nearby wall. It was already eight o' clock... how time flew!

"Do we have any milk?" I growled unhappily. Madara checked and nodded. I grinned once more, all was well! "I just realized something earlier."

"What?" Madara asked with a full mouth of cookie.

"My birthday is coming up... I actually thought September just started!" I grabbed a cookie off the rack even though it was still falling apart into gooey chunks. I guzzled a cup of milk after shoving the cookie in my mouth and sighed in delight.

"Really? What day's your birthday?"

"October seventh, on a Thursday... it's actually in less than a week, and I didn't even realize it..." I grabbed another cookie in a hurry. Madara huffed in response. "What are you hoping to get for your birthday?" He nibbled on a cookie cutely.

"I never know what I want for my birthday until it's long passed... I'm fond of just about anything, but I think I'd prefer money to renovate my room..."

"Eh, I understand that, but just getting money for your birthday is never really fun..." He said flatly.

"Unless you're Kakuzu or you grew up poor, like myself," I muttered.

"I'll come up with something for you if you're gonna be stubborn, Mina-chan..." I rolled my eyes and ignored him. I supposed hed be coming up with something himself then.

* * *

After talking with Madara, I skipped up to my room and go to sleep in pretty good timing. It surprised me, considering I slept in till twelve and went to sleep twice (if you count when I fainted), but I certainly didn't complain. The next morning, I awoke literally shaken. I sat up in my inflatable chair and looked to my hands; I wa shaking like a leaf and was sweaty... _Not _a good combination. I had the dream again... but this time, there was no Tobi knocking on the door... there was no "Adios, amigo! Arriba!" There were no interruptions. Just Hidan banging me into the floor. I ran to the bathroom and washed off my flustered face. I sank to the floor and wondered why it was Hidan I kept thinking of. _Hidan of alllll people? He was the most confusing and feeling-unbalancing person I knew for Jashin's sake!_

How much more of an idiot could I be? "Going out" with Deidara, kissing Madara (_damn, their names sounded alike...),_ and fantasizing about Hidan. What was wrong with my dysfunctional brain? I huffed and look at my pale legs. I felt my heart begin to race when I thought of how Hidan felt them in my dream; just the way he ran his fingertips along my skin was enough to give me goosebumps... My breathing hitched as I held my chest, cupping a handful of it and running my fingers over the soft material of my bra, still shaking with anticipation. I remembered how I pleaded him and begged him for more. Like he did in my dream, I unbuttoned my dress and let it pool around my waist. I unclasped my bra and with each hand, took the hardened skin of my pink tips between my fingers and thumbs before rubbing ever so lightly. _Just the feeling, the thought of Hidan..._ I grew wet upon imagining so, and I blushed deeply. _The way he went about it, the pressure he had and how he made me yell, and I couldn't keep quiet._

"Ahh," I bit my lip and completely removed my dress. I made haste with my panties and kicked them to the side. I sat on my knees, touching myself shamefully. I couldn't believe myself for resorting to this... I caressed my skin and I slipped my fingers into my entrance. An odd sensation built in my lower area, and I threw my head back a bit trying to keep from moaning. I touched my inner walls and slid my fingers in various different ways causing different feelings, and it was unlike anything else.

"H-Hidan..." I moaned lowly. I breathed harder and motioned faster. I touched my small jewel and it sent pulsing waves of ecstasy washing over me, "Shit!" My hiss echoed throughout the bathroom and my eyes widened. When I thught the coast is clear, I did it once more, harder. "Hidan, Hidan..." I cooed repeatedly and lightly, clamping my eyes shut.

"Mina-san, hurry the fuck up, I gotta piss like a racehorse!" I jumped so hard, I nearly pass out and I silently growled before redressing and washing my hands. I fixed my messy hair and open the door. I glared at Suigetsu, "If I don't look pretty, it's your fault." _And if I never get off, it was your fault, too, jackass._ He scoffed," Feh, you look like you usually do. Interpret that however." I kicked him in the leg and walk to my room. I shut the door and walk to my chair, but I was stopped when I ran into something hard and big. I covered my face in pain and flinched.

"Huh? Oh, Mina-chan, there you are!" I looked up and Hidan smiled at me happily. Pain or not, my eyes automatically lit up and I grabbed Hidan by the waist.

"I didn't know you'd miss me _that_ much," Hidan muttered, haughtily. Normally, I would cuss him out for that kind of remark, but I simply looked up at him and giggled. He noticed my change in behavior too, and skeptically cocked a brow.

"I don't know what it is... but I've really, really missed you, Hidan-kun." _Ohhhh, shit, I added the "-kun" part. How was he gonna take that...?_ Hidan chuckled and hugged me back, putting his head atop my own. I loved this. Hidan's scent was intoxicating, and I felt protected. I slid my hand up to his neck and fingered the beaded string of his Jashinist pendant gingerly. The cold, sleek metal against my skin was tantalizing odd. Suddenly, I found odd appreciation in the fact that Hidan never wore his cloak around the base or a shirt at all, for that matter. I took a step backward from him and admired his beautifully pale, lavender eyes which seemed to be searching my own for answer to unspoken questions. I smiled, "There's just something about you that I don't know how to handle... and, as selfish as it is, I've realized how much that I need you around me."

Hidan returned the gesture, too, and walked over to me to whisper something in my ear.

_I hope Jashin didn't let me mess this up!_

* * *

And cut!  
School starts in **eight** days! Whadafuck? I'm using all my time to write, because I won't have time, assumptionally, once school is in session...  
Thank you to everyone that voted in my blind poll. I think the result became pretty obvious within this chapter.  
I absolutely loved typing this chapter ouuut~! It's sinfully funny. _Goddamn, too much sex!_ Teehee. I also liked writing Madara. Funneh, yet srs. x3  
My small writer's block has been conquered! I feel so victorious~! I know exactly what's gonna happen next and after that, and I think I know how it will end! I have high hopes that the end is far from near though. So don't fret!  
Well, I've spent forever writing this all, so _please_ review if you liked this update!

Till chapter thirteen!


	13. Party Hardy

Hiya!  
A review = gave me idea. That's how crucial reviews are.  
I believe it's a twist no one's expecting!  
... kinda. ._.  
In the start, I typed four thousand words for this chapter... it was solely of thoughts according to my previous plans (I even wrote a full lemon...), then inspiration struck me, so I erased half of what I had written and rewrote, eventually coming up with this. *If you want me to send you the lemon so you can read it just for the heck of it, tell me.  
OHMYGOD, READ.

Enjoy reading!

* * *

_Hidan looked at me smugly and leaned in toward my ear. He chuckled and said, "That's far from selfish." That was Hidan's simple reply to me after I poured my feelings out to him, and he walked away afterwards._

My hopes automatically fell through the floor. Of all the times Hidan had tried to "win me over" and woo me with vulgarity, he walked away when I was really finding myself attracted and pulled into him. Maybe he was just being dense or modest!

"Happy almost birthday, Mina-me-chan~!" I looked up as Madara- or... Tobi, in this case- ran to my side and hugged me cheerfully. I squeezed him and he laughed, then covered the area of where his mouth would be without his mask in awe, "Ooh, Tobi likes Mina-me-chan's dress! It's very pretty on Mina-me-chan!" I checked down to my outfit, "Thank you, Tobi-kun!" I was wearing the kimono I bought when I went to the festival before.

"Your 'almost birthay?'" Hidan questioned from beside me, "What's the little fuck talking about?" Tobi stomped unhappily. "Hey, Tobi's not a-"

"He's not a 'fuck,' Hidan, and my birthday is in five days. I totally forgot about it till yesterday..." I silently hung my head and sulked.

"Well, damn, you didn't tell me so I'd have time to find something for you?" _After he pretty much rejected me earlier, he was acting like nothing happened..._

"I _said _I forgot! Besides, I don't want anything, don't worry about it!" I reasoned sheepishly. Tobi sighed and crossed his arms, "That's what Mina-me-chan told Tobi, too."

"Bullshit, I'm getting you something even if it costs me an arm and a leg, Minami-chan," he muttered. I shone him a smile, "Aww, shucks, you're a doll." Hidan stared at me with a flat expression, but ended up cracking a smile, "You know, you can be a real retard."

"Oh, so can you, Hidan," I replied only half-jokingly. I fake punched Tobi before skipping into the kitchen. Leader saw me and waved me over; Hidan and Tobi followed. Everyone was present except Itachi and Kisame, of course, because Leader had them out on consecutive missions.

"Good timing, you three. We need to converse of the sealing technique and our next big mission," Leader sayid.

_Is this the cataclysm Madara was talking about?_

"Before we all set out, we have to seal the gathered bijuu," Konan spoke for Leader, "This process takes two to three days total, and we have... quiet a bit of ground to cover... five bijuu, meaning, we'll be taking ten to fifteen days to seal them all."

"B-but... my birthday is in five days..." I protested quietly.

"I'm sorry, Mina-chan..." Konan replied, sincerely upseted.

"That's bullshit though! I haven't even gotten her a gift!" Hidan yelled. Everyone looked at Hidan in surprise. "Wh-what the fuck are you bitches all staring at? Idiots..."

"Fine... we'll wait till your birthday is over," Leader sighed, "The assassins aren't back with their bijuu anyway." I beamed happily and thanked them repeatedly.

"I'll explain the mission after we seal the bijuu, too, since it ties in with the subject. You're all dismissed... I suppose."

* * *

_It was weird how time passed so quickly while I was happy. I could sit in a room and talk about nothing, and it ate up all my time. Shopping helped, too! Oh, and cooking sweets with Madara was always fun; he always found a way to make himself look like a retard- an adorable one, but still a retard. Anyway, even if I had to listen to Karin and Suigetsu bitch about everything, life seemed great, so as long I stayed happy and looked on the bright side of things._

_That's why I didn't dare to think about Deidara. It'd just piss me off somehow._

_My nineteenth birthday was coming up, and it wouldn't surprise me if he didn't know... and considering he didn't know, he won't even think of sending me a letter just to wish me a happy day. I didn't think of him because of he thoughts I'd had about Hidan, and for kissing Tobi. Hell, I felt **very **guilty for somehow leading Madara on. I felt worse when it came to Deidara himself though; I mean, I knew Tobi better than Deidara, but I kissed Tobi and rejected it from Deidara. When he left, I was so sure things would be okay, and in the moment, everything had been perfect... but looking back, I thought about losing my virginity, and, aside, kissed the infamous, super evil criminal that founded the Akatsuki.  
__I felt like a really horrible person, but I tried to simply not think about it. __I just said it never happened in my head, but I knew it was there._

* * *

Right before my eyes, five days passed. During that period, of course, I acted all paranoid that someone was gonna be, like, "OHEMGEE. HAY, MEE-NAH, WHUT YUH WANT FORE YER B-DAY? But no one ever said anything... except Hidan and Tobi, but those two didn't directly ask me either, surprisingly.

When I awoke on the day of my birthday, all seemed normal... I didn't dream of Hidan, thank Jashin. _All that mess must've started because I got so into Icha Icha Paradise, and Hidan was the only one I really talked to. _I stretched, making my way over to closet. Thankfully, yet much to Kakuzu's dismay, we bought a washer and drier set. I pulled my white and blue corset dress out and threw it on before tossing my hair over my shoulders, leaving it messy. I planned to go find Tobi, and ask if he wanted to go to town with me to buy a board game or something from a nearby shop, but I stopped upon opening my door and seeing the said man sitting in front of my door.

"Happy birthday, Mina-me-chan!" He sprung up onto his feet to hugged me. Confused, I blushed a little when he pushed me backward into my room and shut the door with his foot. He turned and locked the door, and the infamous Madara made his appearance as he removed his mask. I smiled silently while watching him as he set his mask on my neon pink, blow up chair. He straightened and grinned, "Happy birthday, Minami-chan." He hugged me once more, but this time keeping me close.

"Of course, this subject isn't related to your birthday, but I wanted to thank you. You've kept my identity hidden without anyone even guessing you know something out of the ordinary... Konan and Leader didn't even know you were aware of my name until I told them."

"It's not a problem, Madara-kun. I'm really glad you trust me enough to tell me!" I replied and looked at him. He released me and crossed his arms, like usual. "From the first time I saw you... I was able to determine that you weren't like the normal teenage girl. You're mature and nice... and you're 'cute~!'" He mocked me with the word "cute," referring to when I had basically implied that I thought he was cute. He sighed in defeated demeanor, "I don't know, I'm sure that unintentionally sounds odd." I leaned against the wall, "Thank you, Madara-kun, that... that means a lot!" I shyly twirled a piece of my hair and stared at the floor, "And it's not weird, it's you being honest."

"I appreciate that you understand," Madara said, "Now, that aside, about things pertaining to your birthday." My eyes lit up. _A present? What could it be?_ Madara pinned me against the wall, staring into my eyes fiercely. His eyes rested on my lips and I faltered, "M-Madara-kun..." I put my finger over his lips, "I'm sorry..." His brows furrowed, "Minami..."

"Please don't be mad but there's something that's been sitting on my conscience. It's, well, Deidara." I winced, waiting for him to yell at me, but he simply caressed my cheek. "You're stuck, aren't you?"

"You... you aren't mad?" I squeaked quietly.

"It's not like I claimed you as my own," he said. His eyes traced the floor as he backs away, "I just figured... since I told you about Deidara's mental condition, that you'd feel a bit less guilty of doing what you want. I hate saying it to you, but he's _crazy. _He sees and hears people that aren't there, he's delusional and he-" _That statement reminded me of the first time I saw Deidara... that was the first and last time I ever heard him talk to himself, so if he was crazy, he hid it well._

"Well..."

"Did he ever even properly ask you out?" Madara asked curiously. I paused in realization. _Holy shit... he could've had a __**real **__girlfriend this whole time aside from me! _"No... he didn't, but... I mean, he acted like I mattered and told me I was important to him."

"You're important thing to me, Mina-chan," he said and moistened his lips, "Am I alike Deidara now? I act like you matter."

"II never thought about it before now..."

"I'm just asking you to enjoy your day and life without worrying about someone who isn't technically devoted to you," Madara mumbled, turning away. I pushed off of the wall and hugged him tightly. He sighed, "I'm not bringing this to your attention to make you feel bad."

"I know, Madara-kun... don't leave yet," I muttered into his back.

"Let's pretend we didn't talk about this... okay?" He asked quietly. I nodded against his skin and my eyes wander the room when he wiggles oddly, "Good grief, you could at least make this fair."

"... What?"

"I can't hug you when you're hugging my back." He looked over his shoulder at me with a boyish smile, and I giggled, stepped in front him, and proceeded with my actions. He held me tightly and inhaled, "You smell like cookies."

"What the hell? I do _not!" _

He simply giggles lowly. "Well, how would you know? You're accustomed to your own smell, as is everyone else to theirs, so you can't tell." I moaned, feeling like a teased child, "Yeah, whatever, I know I don't smell like cookies though! I don't even eat them that much!"

It grew quiet and he stared at me blankly... which meant he was silently disagreeing. I shoved his arm and laughed, "Geez, Madara-kun..."

"Well... happy birthday, Mina-chan. I'll try to make it your best, all right?"

I nodded excitedly and pecked him on the lips before running out of the room. _Madara was right. I needed to have some fun and forget Deidara- I knew he wasn't really committed anyway. Hell, he never asked me out! _

"Mina-chan!" I turned to Suigetsu and Juugo and waved.

"Happy birthday," Juugo said quietly while Suigetsu winked and threw an arm around his buddy, "Yeah, what he said! Happy birthday, old lady!" I growled at him as he gave me a thumbs up; I merely thanked Juugo, walking away.

_I wondered what today held for me..._

"H-hey! Mina-chan!" Tobi, with his mask back on, ran in front of me as I walked through the hallway's threshold. He made a satisfied noise, "I want to see your reaction." I looked at him condescendingly, "What're you..." I glanced beyond my friend and my tummy knotted upon seeing the main entrance room decorated with streamers and various decorations. I blinked a couple of times to reassure myself that this was real.

"Pretty stinkin' neat, huh~?" He asked happily. I nodded in excitement and grabbed his wrist to slip down the stairs into the kitchen. We walked in as Ran pointed her paws at everyone while yelling, "You guys, shush! Mina-chan is coming, shut up and-"

"SURPRISE!" I couldn't tell who joined in the serenade, but I didn't care... this was too _awesome_ to worry about that! Ran looked to me surprised, "Eh? Uhh... surprise! What they said..." I laughed and picked her up gently. Her little paws dangled in the air cutely, and I frowned at her, "I'm sorry, Hime-chan."

"It's okay, Mina-chan! Now pull me closer so I can reach you and hug you, damnit! We have to share the love!" She demanded. I laughed sheepishly as she tried to hug me with her tiny paws.

"Happy birthday, chick!" Ran chimed and hopped out of my hands onto the kitchen table. The kitchen was decorated, too. From the ceiling hung what appeared to be a chandelier of multicolored streamers, all of my favorite colors. The table had a little spot for Ran to sit, but the rest of its area held foods among foods- mostly being sweets- and a cardboard box sat by it with presents inside. I got the urge to cry out of utter joy, but I sucked it up and stared in awe at the room. Through the door, the living room had newly added game stations and another couch and a new, bigger t.v. There was a coffee table with papers and other random things all over it. Currently, though, everyone was in the kitchen with me; Suigetsu and Juugo made their way down, too. I noticed the the assassins still weren't back, and silently thanked Jashin.

"Aww... y-you guys are so great!" I put my hands on my cheeks in a shy demeanor. "You all really didn't have to..."

"Yeah, we did!" Tobi yelled, "Through celebration of Mina-me-chan, everyone gets to get fat and enjoy ourselves, too!" I scoffed, "I'm glad I can help you get fat then."

"So is Tobi, Mina-me-chan, so is Tobi!"

"Well, birthday girl, do you think we should cut the cake?" Konan asked. I pursed my lips, "What about breakfast...?"

"We... we got enough cake to last us the whole day..." Leader muttered in a bit of a defeated way. Suigetsu popped into view, "Yeah, and we gotta kegger!"

"A kegger...? God, you guys, what did you not get?"

"When we party, we party hardy!" Madara yelled and threw an arm around me. I shook my head, "This party is going to last a long time, isn't it?"

"You fucking bet!" Hidan cheered, "We're getting wasted!" I smiled, "Well, you're drunken games can wait till we eat cake and stuff, I don't want anyone humping my presents."

"Let's get to it, so we can party then!" Karin said bitchily. I rolled my eyes and we all walked over to the table to sit down. Leader was even nice enough to let me sit at the head of the table where he usually sat! The cake was already waiting for us, and it was freaking _HUGE._ There were two single candles, one in the shape of a one, the other as a nine. My eyes were wide, "This can last us for longer than a day!"

"Not after this..." Madara trailed. He stood behind me and pushed me in to the table and just as I started to thank him, he laughed and shoves my face… _into my own cake._ I gasped and grabbed a handful of off the fluffy mess before chucking it at him; it successfully hit him in the face- or, the mask more accurately. He bursted out in laughter and I chucked some at everyone else, too. I licked my lips, "This cake tastes good!" I wiped my face and after he lit the candles, Madara sat in a chair by me. He held his hands up, as if surrendering, "Tobi won't touch the cake. Tobi's done."

"If you guys are done flirting," Konan sang, "One, two, three~! Happy birthday to you-"

I smiled happily._ I'd never had a real, genuine birthday party... I was sad I missed out before. Then again, my last birthday, I was stuck in an abandoned house all by myself. Now... I had my whole family here._ Everyone joined in with Konan and finished "Happy Birthday," as I blew my candles out.

"Good, now to cut the cake!" I got the plates and a knife and cut everyone a piece of cake. It was half vanilla and half chocolate with white icing and sugar-loaded flowers. _It was really pretty before my face was shoved into it... I had to get Madara back later._ After everyone had cake, I got my own and ate it.

"Thank you for that, Tobi-kun," I stole a bite of his cake off his plate with my fork. I heard him laugh, "You smell like cake now." I couldn't keep myself from doing the same loudly. _I guess cake was just as good as cookies..._

"Here, here!" I looked own as Ran scooted a decently sized little box over to me, "Open mine first!" I took the box and looked at everyone as they sit at the table. Typically enough, Suigetsu and Karin, and Hidan and Kakuzu were fighting with one another. Hidan noticed me watching and smiled sheepishly. Kakuzu simply rolled his eyes at him. I ripped the wrapping off of the box and opened it cautiously. My eyes automatically lit up as I pulled a tiara out of the box.

"It's made with real diamonds!" Ran squeaked, "You'll match me now!" I giggled at her comment; I was finally allowed to be a princess, too? It was true, she got me a replica of her favorite tiara- she wore it everywhere when in her Himeko form. I thanked her and Kakuzu actually gets up to hand me an envelope. I looked happy in a small demeanor, thanking him. _It surprised me someone as greedy as himself even thought of getting me something... _I opened the paper flap and pulled out a folded sheet of paper. I flipped it unfolded, and it read_:_

_Minami,_

_Hidan said you want money for your birthday._

_You along with a lot of others are aware that I value my money like my life._

_Interpret this however it'll satisfy you._

I looked to the piece of green paper. _A dollar, huh? That was saying something, considering it came from Kakuzu._ Hidan set my box of presents beside me.

"Here... just so people don't have to waste their breath going back and forth." I nodded and grabbed another to open it. Confused, I stared at the package, and Konan raised her hand, "That's mine! I'm giving you a piercing set, 'cause you'd look adorable with a piercing like mine~! There's another one in there from me, too!" I grabbed the present that was beneath the previous and opened it; to my delight, it was a box with an outfit inside. I pulled it out in awe. "A-a dress?"

"Uhh... no..." She muttered. I unraveled the cloth and blushed to the max upon finding a smooth, black and turquoise bustier set. "K-KONAN-CHAN!"

"Well... I use mine quite a bit..." She giddily explained and looked to Leader suggestively, then me again, "I figured you'd need it eventually... I'm sure the guys wouldn't mind if you called it a 'dress' and walked around in it." Laughter roared loudly among the table, and I sighed under my breath, ashamed for my friend. I set it to the side and grabbed a decently big package. On it, small, nearly illegible writing said: "From Leader." I shrugged and unwrapped it to reveal a plastic bowl of cookie dough. I heard Madara laugh, but I smiled when I saw the note that says: "Open." I opened it and pulled out a pair of blue, rather big sized, star-shaped earrings. My expression grew even wider as I put them on, noticing they matched my dress. "Thank you, Leader-sama!" He cracked a smirk in return and I pulled yet another present into my lap.

"That's from Tobi, Mina-me-chan," Madara whispered. My eyes widened, his was the biggest present out of the bunch... I ripped off the paper and blush. A container of cookie dough (with cookie mix inside this time), a shoe box, and note. I flipped the lid of the shoe box off and decided these were my favorite gift. Seeing as I was too lazy to pull my zori on this morning, I went bare foot, but I easily found that these shoes were too cute to not wear. They were black, designer, ankle boots, and they looked damn expensive... I picked up the loose paper that slipped to the bottom of the box happily.

_Mina-me-chan,_

_You have more presents from me... they may be indirect at first, but you'll be able to tell._

_Tobi_

_P.S. ...Okay, so maybe they aren't all indirect. There's a present in your room that Sasuke, Suigetsu, Karin, Juugo, and I pitched in to get you._

Shyly, I looked up to him and smiled the biggest I had since I woke up. He nodded and crossed his arms.

"Hurry up and open my present, Mina-chan!" Hidan yelled. I looked up in time to catch him as he sent Tobi a douchey glare. _Men... _I pulled out my last present, and before opening it, I took the fancy bow off and stuck it on my head proudly. The package was so loaded down with tape that I had to borrow a kunai from Tobi just to get into it. I held my present up, and smile. _This was a dress... and not a stupid bustier either!_ It looked a lot like the dress I was wearing, but it was a solid emerald green with a lace-up front. The bow at the top was large, but just the right size; and the general length of the dress was decently modest. I look around, wondering who got it for me, then I looked back down into the bottom of the box and beamed. _Strung together, beads surrounded a Jashinist pendant on a necklace._ I gladly hung it around my neck carefully. The metal was cold against my skin and it shone brilliantly in the light.

"Yeah, that's my girl!" Hidan yelled. "Jashin has to be happy about this'n." I rolled my eyes and sighed, "Well, that's all of them. Thanks a bunch, guys, you're all really, really sweet!"

"Hell yeah, now the real party starts!" Suigetsu yelled while running out of the room, flailing his arms like an idiot, "Now where's the kegger?"

* * *

_I couldn't believe this._ My face lit up with joy and I turned to the five of them, as they watched my reaction. I hugged them each- Suigetsu, Karin, Juugo, Madara, and Sasuke even. _They bought me a mattress! That was fucking insane!_ "You guys are awesome to the goddamn max! I love y'all! This is great!" I yelled. Suigetsu held a pitcher of some foreign liquid (which I was guessing was alchohol) up and winked before drinking straight out of it. Karin giggled and held Sasuke's arm, "We're glad you like it, Mina-san! Aren't we Sasu-kun?"

"Shut up..." Sasuke walked away, in result, Karin chased after him, Suigetsu ran after her to pick on her, and Juugo tread behind him silently. I spun around in my room before setting my box of presents down on my new bed.

"This has been such a great day so far..." I muttered happily. I hear the door shut, and Tobi threw his mask onto my bed. He sat down and smiled, "I'm glad it's gone well."

"Of course! Honestly... I have to say your gifts are the best," I laughed quietly, "The decorations are phenomenal... and the food looks _so_ good..."

"Well, I think Konan and Himeko worked on the food, but I did the rest..." He crossed his arms in mock-pride, "But I certainly _'don't'_ want to toot my own horn... though, I diiiid do pretty darn good." I shook my head and he continued, "I guess I'm just thaaat great, I guess. I think it natur-" I gripped his Akatsuki cloak in my hands and kissed him for a moment. "Let me be the one to tell you that you did good, Madara-kun." I could have swore a blush crosses his features as he blinked in surprise. His reaction caused me to laugh, and I turned to my presents, "Well, scooch your booch, I wanna try these on."

"Ugh... but I'll have to put my mask on and walk aaall the way out there, wait for you, then come back in and take my mask back off. Time consuming and physically challenging," he replied. I squinted at him, "You have to keep your eyes closed though, you."

"You know, even better, I'll turn around this way, then you tell me when, 'kay?" He proposed, "And I'll tell you my opinion, if you want."

"Uhh... maybe for the dress. Not so much on the... bustier set though..." I blushed and glared at said piece of clothing.

"All right, hurry up though."

"H-hey! I have to make sure it looks okay and stuff! Be patient, or out you go, Mister!"

"Okay, okay..." Tobi turned away to face the wall, and I picked up the bustier. I looked at it in horror and undressed hastily. I slipedp it on and noticed that the attachable socks had fallen out of the material. I pulled the socks on and attach them to the straps of the bustier set. I straightened the cloth and admired the set. _As much as I hated to say it... I felt really sexy in this..._ _I looked pretty sexy in it, too... Damn!_ I mentally cheered and try my emerald green dress on.

"How does it look, Madara-kun?" I asked. He smiled sweetly, "Beautifully, Mina-chan." I put my hair up in a bun while thanking him. "You're really sweet..." I complemented, then lowered my voice, "Now... about that cake incident..."

Tobi backed up toward the wall with each step I took. I cracked my knuckles, "Get your ass over here!"

"Nooo! Mina-chan!"

_And this was just the beginning of the day?_

_I wished my birthday came around more often!_

* * *

This story is _officially_ HidaOC (no, Hidan isn't out of this story XD) and MadaOC~!  
Asdfghjkl, this chapter isn't the best... I was confused on how to put if all down.  
And! To my regular readers, I will be editing some of the earlier chapters so some of the story will make better sense. That, and because I looked over a previous chapter  
and saw a crapload of typos... So if something doesn't sound right in the future, that's probably why.  
Also, the d key on my keyboard is being mean. If you see a bunch of _an_s instead of _and_s, that's why. I have to kill the d key to get it to work.

Till chapter fourteen!

**Remember to vote in the poll on my page!**

**And review.**

**Please. :3**

**Thank yooou!**


	14. Whoa, Tiger

Okay. This is short. I just wanted to get something up to update for tha kicks. Not the best chapter. I'm just trying to get back into my Naruto vibe.

Try to enjoy, please? Haha ;-;

* * *

The rickety, old, ceiling fan spun slowly, its lights seemed to bizarrely divide and mutate and multiply into different shapes. The colors were indefinite, fading from one shade to another. Things brightened and dimmed, and I could swear I was running around in what seemed to be a kaleidoscope. The buffeted air wafted around gently, tickling my bare stomach. A giggle escaped and I inhaled, taking in my surroundings, before releasing a drunken hiccup. Nearby, Suigetsu and Juugo sang on the karaoke set sounding alike suffering animals while chugging glass after glass of their toxic addictions, without Hidan to my pleasant surprise. Turning my attention forward, Tobi laid a hand of cards down; he laughed triumphantly, thinking that he had things wrapped up. I viewed my cards then laid them down as he did. He grow silent, but I continued laughing for him.

"Pants."

Strip poker was my game; sure, I _was_ losing earlier... but I was making a come back! I bit my lip and Tobi stood up and peeled his pants off before throwing them at my face like the jerk he was. I tossed them away, and pointed at him, "You better not get a boner-" a slow, off-beat giggle should be inserted here... "I-I can see it aaall, buddy..."

"Why're you looking, you cougar?" Tobi yelled, sitting down once more. I complained on how I was definitely not a cougar. We drew another round. Currently, I was in my bra and panties; Tobi was simply in his plaid patterned boxers (we weren't not including his mask for the game)- I was winning by one article of clothing. We laid our cards down at the same time, and I cackled evilly, "CHECKMATE, BITCH!"

"Fuck ass!" He slurred a bit, "I'm not taking these off!"

"Y-you have to, or that would be _cheating."_

_"_Your mom would be cheating. With me. In bed."

"Wow... NEW LEVEL OF LAME."

He sighed, "I know..."

"Take 'em off!" I pounced on him and laughed stupidly before hugging him and nuzzling his neck with my own heated flesh. His hands slipped from the wooden floor up my bare side to squeeze my hip. I laughed again and pushed against him, his foundation giving out and settling to the floor, me above him, legs spread to surround his shaken pelvis. A blush crept into existence and he yanked his mask off seeming a bit flustered.

"What about Juugo and Suigestu? They'll see your face..." I muttered, gesturing to him. I had a feeling that he would roll his eyes at that remark.

"Those two are hammered, you really think they'll remember anything?" He pushed my body down on him, then caressed the nape of my neck, smothering his cutely pink, liquor-tainted lips onto mine in a sinfully delicious demeanor. I nearly melted; my knees shook and I forced my hands between he and I to run my trembling fingers across his chest. It was muscular, to any girl's delight, each crevice sent a shock wave of admiration and, more importantly, sense of need down my spine, lower and lower each time. Tobi growled lowly, nibbling my lip, then moving to my jawline and ear and neck; I sighed happily, small, incoherent whispers scratching through the ways of my vocal cords. Tobi's hand slowly feathered to my back and rested there for a moment. I pulled away from him, sitting up with not so decent posture. He began receding, a look of shame crossing his face. Mentally, I burst out in laughter; how cute could he get?

I grabbed his hand and he watched curiously; I gingerly placed it atop a mound of my chest. He blushed deeply and I bendt his fingers with mine, his slender digits cautiously squeezing me. _You felt my pain, "Mr. I-Never-Blush!" _I arched forward into him, my head falling back a little and I bit my lip, experiencing an odd rush pulsing through my constricted veins. Tobi's eyes lock onto my half-lidded own and a shy smile played his face. I giggled, "This isn't the time to be shy, Madara-kun..." His laugh echoed through the room also, and he stood up with me in his arms. I blinked when he carries me up the stairs dizzily.

I bounced with he timing of his oddly comfy mattress. He pulled me into my previous position and I got goosebumps, feeling something odd prod down below. I was breathing hard. I bit my lip upon noticing it, being a bit embarrassed, but I heard his own breaths pulsating right over mine. I smiled and leaned own to kiss him, a small peck on the lips. Another ensued, then another, and his grip slid up my thighs to rest on the small of my back. I gained the nerve and run my finger over his nipples. I tweaked them lightly and he gave a low grunt. I couldn't tell if he's annoyed or what, but upon pulling back, a smirk spread across his features as he flipped me over to do the same to me. A shaky sigh wiggled out of me and he lowered his mouth to my neck to smother it with affection. Tobi's tongue protruded and tickled my collarbone and below that and below that to take a hardened pink tip. His hands held my wrists above my head. His hips ground into mine and I slung my legs around his waist.

Heated moans erupted from me and I surprised myself with the frequency. He moved up to kiss me, then simply gazed me. "That's as far as I'll go, Mina-chan." I could only imagine the twist in my expression, from lusting to utter confusion and disappointment. The repeated pulsing between my thighs pounded even harder, and I gulped, "Did I do something wrong, Madara-kun?" His dark orbs rested upon my own emeralds and he took my hand and kisses it, his lips lingering for a moment. "It's not the right time." I felt myself blush like a crazed, little kid embarrassed by a parent, like a scolded child and in result lower my head, like a child would also. I still couldn't help gawking at the male. Tobi chuckled, "You look adorable, Mina-chan... I swear." I wondered why he made that comment then and stuck my tongue out at him. A smirk crossed him, "You want me to bite it off?"

"What? No, you bastard!" I quickly scooched away from him, nose in the air pleasantly. "You want me to bite your dick off?" I glanced back at him, arched brows to find his face distorted within the thought. "What is a man without his dick?" He eyed his appendage and sighed, "That's my best friend."

"Well, call it Talula and marry it if you love it so much," I looked away once more, "And to answer you, a man without a dick is physically deprived." He chuckled lightly and pulled me to him by my waist. "Are you getting butthurt because I love my dick?" I nodded, affirmative, just for the heck of it.

"So you wouldn't want to die if someone cut your... boobs, butt, or hair off?"

"I would, but that stuff is important!"

"As is my dick."

"And my tongue. You started all this," I squandered quietly, joking of course, standing this time. I heard him yawn and before I left, leaned down to kiss him and run my fingers through his hair. He grinned at me in daze and it reminded me why I found him so... so alluring.

* * *

"Damn, Mina-chan!" Konan yelle, "You're a fucking vixen!"

I could tell she'd had a few drinks. I rubbed my arm shyly. When I tried to live a little, I usually did something I later regretted. This would probably be one of those things, as I stood over the threshold of the common room in my brand new bustier that I was so set on _not_ wearing when I laid my eyes on it.

"Look at them legs!" Suigetsu yelled, "The right is Thanksgiving, the left is Christmas- can I visit between the holidays? Ooh, baby!" He was joking but something sets my skin afire, reddening under the attention that rubs me the wrong way.

"Now that Mina-chan's here, we should have some fun!" The cobalt blue-haired girl suggested. She scurried to my side, winks, then rushed to her room. When she appeared, she_ certainly_ appeared. Her very own pink bustier set draped across her pale skin delicately. Unlike my own which was smooth satin, hers hosted lace around the edges. I didn't see how the hell it didn't annoy her; lace itched like a bitch! I felt stared upon me and I looked around wincing, as if trying to escape a lashing. The males in the room just watched, and I stuttered taking a little step back.

Something pressed onto my lips and when I opened my eyes, I nearly jumped out of my skin. Konan held me to her as I tried to wiggle away. She released me suddenly and I fell. "What in God's fucking name are you doing, Konan-chan?"

"Giving them a show, of course," she smiled evilly, "You know they like it. Especially Hidan. You can see his dick through his pants." A tinkling giggle escaped her as she dropped to her knees, seductively crawling toward me. I threw my hands up as a defense, but she pulled me to her again, and she smothers her mouth across my collarbone, nibbling ever so lightly.

"Shit... someone get me another drink!" Suigetsu barked the order. By the sounds of footsteps, I supposed someone did so accordingly. Konan offered me a drink, and that was all I really remembered.

* * *

"Fuckin' idiots..." Came the unhappy insult, "Wake the fuck up!" An unfamiliar noise racked my brain and I groaned, it was like an explosion in my head. A whirring noise grew closer then passed. I cracked open an eye and go to rub my face but jumped in surprise. A thin line of red fell to my nose and I looked around, realizing I had a lovely cut on my forehead.

I growled lowly. "_Goddamnit!_" I fidgeted in Hidan's grasp as he did his best to make sure nothing came near and kept ambushers abay. A kunai was pinned into the wall beyond us.

* * *

BLAHBLAHBLAH, this is a shit chapter. I know. I just wanted to update so no one thought I was dead.  
I'm alive. :v  
Anyway, I'll be going through and revising some, trying, well, attempting rather, to make myself sound at least a bit more dignified than some sex crazed fanfiction writer.  
I don't expect reviews on this chapter. Don't feel obligated.

I pray to God I'll have fifteen up soon.


	15. Nice Party, Guys

*NOTICE* For some odd, unknown reason, the site hasn't been co-operating well. I've had this all typed up for a while, but I just now found that miracle code to get things working...  
I've decided that I'll be replying to reviews in the a/n of every chapter update, not to make it any longer, it's just because I'm scatter-brained and I read that I have review alerts, get distracted, then never reply or say thanks, which I think is thoroughly rude on my part; if I haven't replied to you, I'm sorry. Many, many thanks. I will start doing this on the next chapter if I receive any reviews.  
It's great to see you guys enjoy this story, really. I just make it all up as I type, so it's phenomenal in my eyes. Thanks!

Enjoy this chapter, 'kay? :D

* * *

"So... this is fucked." I heard. I had no clue who's voice it was, though, I thought it was the Jashinist's. I simply saw a flash of colors before me, and I was dropped. I groaned loudly, wondering how big the crack in my tailbone was. "Hidan, you fucking ass!" He didn't even take my slightly slurred cry into recognition as he gripped his scythe, slinging it at something well above my head. I winced a bit and the room spun lightly.

Clinking reverberated through my head so loudly it hurt. It was the sound of kunai- I couldn't have been mistaken. My senses were up and down, my stomach dropped lower and lower, face feeling numb.

"Mina-chan, get the fuck up unless you wanna get stepped on!" Hidan yelled. I crawled out of his way begrudgingly and tried standing. Well, till something grabbed my waist at least and shoved me to the floor _again_. Upset, I looked up to the figure before me, "Just stay there." Their darkened silhouette kinda looked like Tobi's, so I went with it, but whenever pure blackness encased me, I began doubting my first thought. It was like I was floating or the floor was shifting beneath me as I found myself closer to the person before me, and they sinked into the ground as a puddle of nothingness in this claustrophobic room of ebony vastness. It was tight... yet I was unbound; there were no walls, no boundaries whatsoever.

Then I saw what was before me like lights flipped on in a dark room- our ambushers, bloodshot eyes due to strain, their faces reddened with outrageous madness, expressions twisted into something so utterly and sickly detestable. I forced myself to turn my head, though my view eased back and forth between themselves and what I considered to be the ground. They didn't even look human. I mentally gagged; their skins appeared suddenly ripped, right before my eyes- bodily organs, innards, hanging, just protruding from their erect yet limp bodies; it was such a paradox. They crumbled to the floor in a large, morbid and bloody mess. Their expressions spoke even louder their souls; mouths pried open into a permanent, silent scream to embellish the occasion of quiet of the Akatsuki headquarters. Colors swirled back into view as a newly saturated abstract sight; it made me lightheaded and I growled at myself for not turning the lights off beforehand. I glanced around and even though irked for no good reason, my jaw dropped a bit in change of heart.

Holes in walls, chairs knocked over. Table overturned and food smeared across our home. It was like a pluck of a heart string... our new house was reduced to shit once more. The amount of up-thrown dust settled lightly, and I neglected moving from my spot upon the floor, instead, simply looking around doing my best to keep from resting on the pile of corpses. I met Leader's gaze, then Konan's, Himeko's, too, and up to the person above me.

"Does that make up for the troubles I gave you?" Kaito asked in a murmur. I gritted my teeth, "No one said I couldn't handle myself."

"You said so yourself, physically. You're hungover. You can't do shit while you are." Kaito simply looked at me, then walks passed into the room over. I released a small sigh and staggered to my feet, "Idiotic bastard."

"Hidan, get rid of those bodies," Leader said lowly. Konan gripped the upper part of the sleeve of his cloak and her head tilted downward in the appearance of defeat.

"Who... who were they?" Himeko asked. Her pale fingers graced her bottom lip in worry, eyebrows stitching toward one another.

"I don't know, in all honesty," the male replied, "I have guesses that they're Konoha ninja... but it's nothing less than uncertain."

"How the hell did they figure us out?"

"Why do you ask such vague questions?" Leader asked.

The quiet was so dull. It was sobering. Moonlight peering inward was seemingly colored gray from uprising of remnants of smoke and dust.

"How did this even happen?" And like a flock of frightened animals, we parted, retreating to our rooms, trying to repair the damages around, and catch what little sleep we could.

When I flopped on my bed, I hadn't realized I was so awake. I'd just been sitting here, staring at my ceiling. It was rounding five in the morning. I could hear Leader and the assassins in the hallway talking about something I was unsure of. Their voices were muffled, and oddly, for once, my interest wasn't peaking enough to sit at the door and listen to them talk. I figure they were conversing of the mission the assassins had just returned from, but that was only assumption. The thought seemed right in the least. I hadn't fallen asleep since I was rudely woken by Hidan and his loud antics. Of course, I was thankful he woke me up, but when I woke up to loud noise, it put me in a god awful mood. My eyes were half-opened, though I didn't feel drowsy at all. I stood from my newly bought mattress, which was pretty damn comfortable, if I may have said so myself, and walked to my little nest of things to eat. We'd yet to replace lights, so I was like a blind man running around in this dim lighting. I fingered my belongings once I kneeled nearby them and groaned when I realize it was all books. I couldn't read in bad lighting, unless I wanted the century's worst headache. My mom always told me that I needed glasses, but I never believed her. They seemed like a waste of money to me anyways.

"That is unacceptable!" Leader's outburst made me jump lightly. Even though muffled through the door, I could sense the tension. Leader had always had an odd ability to make me want to piss myself, even if I did get the balls to yell at him on occasion. Especially when_ he_ yelled. _Well... my interest had officially peaked. _I lightly tiptoed to my closed door and placed my ear to the crack.

"We are aware. Any punishment will not be taken lightly," Kaito said. I made a face at his voice. The fucker made me sick.

"It sure as hell better not be taken lightly," Leader snarled in what sounded like a non-human voice. "We spent our savings on this home, and not only did you fail to accomplish your objective, you brought foreign ninja into our base. You will have everything repaired and replaced by the end of the week, along side the bijuu here in the base. You will make things better again, like the last three hours didn't happen. If not, more punishment shall ensue." The next, single word he uttered was just a word, but I could imagine the cold, hardened look he gave to them while he said it. It cut the air between them to achieve correct portrayal of how serious the matter was.

"_Understood?_" I heard the four give signification that they did. Footsteps followed, and for some reason, I got an urge to jump however many feet I was away from it onto my bed. And honestly, it made me feel like a _real_ ninja.

Somehow I managed to fall asleep and remained undisturbed till nearly two in the afternoon. I rubbed my eyes lightly, ridding the sleep away. I rolled over a bit and huffed the crushing headache I had, then pushed myself up into a sitting position. Someone had thrown a blanket over me, I noticed. I pulled it up to my nose and realize it must have been Tobi's. It was a lovely smell that it hosted. I folded it the best I could and walked out of my room, into the hallway, down the stairs, and into the kitchen.

"'Bout time. I was starting to think you died." I looked to my right slightly, then rolled my eyes, only half jokingly. "Spare me, Hidan, you sleep in longer than I do, usually."

"Actually," he laughed a bit," I just woke up."

I sauntered to the fridge and grabbed things to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "Well, at least you're in a good mood." I put everything away once I had my pitiful breakfast together. I took a bite and refrained from spitting my food out. Who in hell bought blackberry jelly? Nasty fuckers.

"How can you tell?" He turned in his wooden seat at the beat up kitchen table to a notepad, pencil in hand. I sat across from him at the table and gawked at him, an eyebrow arched. "You haven't cussed since I've started talking to you this morning, and you're doing something productive." I took another bite and with a full mouth asked, "What're you writing anyway?" I yanked the notebook from him, and he stuttered, before standing up quickly. He'd quickly forgotten the pencil, as it flew across the room.

"No!" He yelled. I blinked at him a bit fervently, then slid it back to him silently, my eyes wide. "Defensive much?" I swallowed the ball of food in my cheek and walked out of the room after finishing. "I take back the thing about you being in a good mood." His glare weighed down on me, and I already knew his response without him having to put it into words. I walked throughout the old home, feeling empty without Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Kisame, and Zetsu here. It was like part of the family had been away for too long. It was like there's no one to talk to, even though that wasn't the case, and I didn't even normally converse with the said absent people anyways.

"Hey, Mina-chan?" I turned to Himeko's voice, then my gaze descended to Ran. She mewled lightly, "Come with me, okay?" I followed her to the poor basement we had where everyone was gathered, other than Hidan who was probably still crooning over that goddamn notebook. He probably wrote smut or something weird like that. _Not that I'd mind to read it..._

It was like I was watching a movie as soon as I noticed the lightbulb dangling from a cord above Leader. His arms were crossed, face cleared of emotion. As if on cue, the roar among the few of us died down a bit, and Leader cleared his throat before speaking, "I'll keep this short and simple: the damages from last night are to be taken care of asap, we will be postponing the sealing of any bijuu, and, to those of you that can, get jobs. We need to start another personal organization savings account. That being said, apply to as many places as possible. That is all." By _those of you that can_, he meant mainly Himeko and I, seeing as how we showed no suspicious traits. I sighed, knowing what it all meant, and continued to my room once more.

* * *

I shut my door behind me and headed over to my pile of clothes on the floor. I still hadn't gotten any hangers, so the floor was home for now. I picked up my red and white sun dress. It was a bit chilly out, so I pick the cardigan up, too. I set them aside and shed my birthday dress. It fell to the ground, and I quivered at the rush of cold upon my skin. I fiddled with my bra and its straps, placing things where they ought to be. Then the door opened. I squealed and hold whatever I could in front of me, which happens to be my small, white sweater. Tobi didn't seem to stop. He walked in and shut the door, throwing his mask down. My heart seemed to calm down, knowing all was well. He, for some reason, didn't even act as if he saw me for a moment, then he stopped and turned to me. His dark, deep brown eyes latched onto my own green ones.

"Mina-chan. You're beautiful." I blushed so immensely, my skin almost sizzled. I smiled happily and he kept looking at me with an odd expression that seemed beyond where we were. He studied my faces and put his hands on my shoulders. "You're so radiantly brilliant and amazing."

"Madara-kun... you're gonna make me burst," I muttered before covering my face shyly. He laughed lowly, "You're such a contrast of yourself. So bold at a moment, yet so adorably shy another. It's cute. I like that you're shy around me, alone." Normally, I'd call him a cocky bastard for a comment like that, but I couldn't say he was wrong. It was just a subtle confidence he had. I winced and threw my cardigan down to cross my arms. Our height difference made me smile. I didn't move my head any, but I shifted my gaze upwards to him. Tobi's hands slipped from my shoulders to my hips. He leaned down to smother my exposed neck with fervent affection that had me giggling like a school girl. I let out a rigid breath, "Madara-kun?"

"Yes, love?" He asked between kisses.

A knock on my door ensues. _Of course._ I threw my dress on quickly, then the sweater and buttoned a few of the buttons, leaving the top half undone. I opened my door and Hidan stood there, a sheepish grin on his face. I patted my hair down quietly and raised my eyebrows at him.

"Leader wants you and Himeko," he said, "To go with me into town to find a job." I simply nodded. I turned around and stuffed all of my things into my lone backpack, pulling my thigh-high zori on also. "I'll meet you guys at the door, Hidan." I heard him grunt and walk away. I was sure to pack an extra set of clothes and a couple of books I'd yet to finish. I zipped it up and put it on, then turned to Madara. He watched me plainly with a nonchalant gaze. I smiled small and intertwine my fingers. Tobi tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "Be well while you're out." He leaned down and kissed my forehead slowly and quietly, then said farewell. I did the same and walked out to the front door.

"Mina-chan, it's about time!" I looked down just in time to see a multi-colored, stuffed kitten launch herself for my shoulder. I had to admit, it scared me to hell and back. I deadpanned, "Hime-chan... give me a warning unless you _want_ my heart to give out..."

"Well, we're late! We were supposed to be in Konoha by now!" She mewed. I watched as she tapped my cheek with one of her small, undefined paws. "Okay, okay. I'm here, so we can go now."

"Good," she turned to his direction," HIDAN, GET THE FUCK OVER HERE, WE'RE LEAVING," She tended to play favorites between us after all. Hidan muttered some smartass remark under his breath as we walked out of the door, and the cat started on her own little rant. Even though the bickering was annoying to hear right off the bat, oddly, it seemed to float in one ear and out the other. _Not that I was complaining about that fact. _The light of the midday shone brightly through autumn colored trees. The air had that crisp fall smell that I loved. Then, the smell of freshly fallen rain mixed with it, and it was so beautiful- it reminded me of why fall was my favorite season. The forest surrounding faded from oranges, reds and yellows into a wall of brilliant greens, signifying Konoha was near. I couldn't help but to huff a bit. Green trees year round had to annoying; there was no variety.

"So, you guys," I started, "We should decide what clan we're all from." I was guess I interrupted a fight, because they stopped for a moment and madly stared at me.

"I'll come up with one." They both said. Theeeen it started all over again. I groaned, "Give it a rest, please? It can be Himura. It just popped into my head."

"Mina-chan, are you okay?" Hidan asked in a crosshurt tone. We all stop for a moment, and I gave him an unimpressed stare. Just as I began to say something, Himeko cut in. "You should be asking yourself that, Hidan. Since when do you care about Mina-chan's wellbeing? You want in her pants or something, don't you?" Hidan's face contorted from surprise to anger within the blink of an eye. He gritted his teeth and clenched his fists before yelling something I never though I'd hear from him.

"Why the fuck would I want in Mina-chan's pants?" For a minute, it seemed to echo around in my head. It caught me _way_ off guard, and I realized, somehow, I missed something this whole time. All of the mock-pervery, pick up lines, and... all the affection that wasn't even legitimate? Goddamn, I was an oblivious motherfucker. I didn't show any facial change, but Himeko paced around on my shoulder angrily or frantically one. I looked at him silently for a moment; his eyes rested upon my own. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, whether he meant that hurtfully or not. I looked to the ground, then turned away and walked on toward the Konoha gates. My shoulder was relieved of Himeko's light weight as she jumped off, but I continued forward. Konoha had a different aura to it- welcoming and warm, and I loved walking into the thick wall of a place I could well call home. As soon as I conversed with the gate guards and walked into the town, the temperature seemingly rose a number of degrees. All of the people smiled and waved to me, even though I was a total stranger to each of them. I waved back and greeted them just to be nice, complementing those that were close enough to hear me. I saw the ramen shop Naruto brought me to previously. An idea struck me, and I didn't see any harm with asking Teuchi about it.

I walked through the white cloths hanging from the front of the shop that were decorated with red paintings of Japanese alphabetical characters.

"Welcome, friend!" I looked to Teuchi as he did something behind the counter. I laughed lightly, "Good afternoon, Teuchi-san." He looked up a bit surprised, "Ahh, Mina-san! I'm sorry, I was so busy I didn't even see who it was that came in. Have a seat, please." I did so and crossed my legs at the ankles.

"What'll you have this fine day?" He asked. I scanned the overhead menu, "Well, originally I didn't come for ramen, just to ask a question, but now that I'm here, I'll take today's special." The elderly man smiled and nodded, "That's just fine. Now, what were you going to ask about?" He turned to the small kitchen, preparing my bowl and shouting to Ayame what the order was. I tapped my chin lightly, "Well... you see, my clan is going to be taking residence in the village, but I'm extremely low on money, and I'd-"

"Oh, Mina-san, why didn't you just say so? There's a perfect place for you to get a job. I'll write down directions from here and everything you need to know about it before you leave." And with that, Teuchi turned to the back of the restaurant, working busily as a bee. I deadpanned. _Well, that wasn't how I imagined things going in the least_... Moments later, the man slid my bowl to me and I grabbed chopsticks to eat it with; let me just say, this was **so** much better than a peanut butter and blackberry sandwich any day.

When I stood to leave, my friend gave me a slip of paper with directions on it to a local home. At the top, it said _Housekeeping Service. _I skimmed it over once, then looked to Teuchi and thanked him.

"No, no. Not a problem," He laughed. I handed him the money to pay for my meal, and he counted it over. "You know, I don't see why you didn't just ask for a job here though." I sweatdropped, "Teuchi-san... that's-"

"Well, you should probably go and see about that job. Good luck, Mina-san!" I huffed under my breath and stomped away, even though I never got out what I was going to ask. The small paper in my hand fluttered around with the wind delicately, and I watched as sporadic leaves free fell from above. Following the directions, I had to say, I had no fucking earthly clue where I was going. When I ended up where it says I'm supposed to, I paced before a large home, looming ahead. It appeared to be two stories, but I wasn't particularly sure. The width of the home was bigger than the height, I noticed. There was a garden surrounding it, so many beautiful colors splashing the scenery. _Before someone walks out and asks what I was doing I should probably introduce myself. _I tiptoed up to the door and knock. I always hated knocking on doors, because I didn't want to knock too lightly, but I didn't want to make it seem like I was beating the door. It was hard to get it just right. I waited a moment.

Nothing.

I went to knock again, but just before I do so, the door was opened and a stern, tanned woman hosted spot on the threshold. I blinked a bit upon realizing the fact that she wasn't planning on saying hello. "I'm here about the house keeping? I'd love to be of any service I can, miss."

"Oh, the house keeping. I thought you were trying to sell cookies or some shit like that," she muttered, trailing off a bit. She perked back up and gestured me in, "Please, do come in. My daughter, Hana, put word in the newspaper for the job. She wants to ask a couple of questions, I assume."

"That's perfectly fine, ma'am," I replied. She guided me into a spacey room with white furniture. It was all so lovely, and looked so clean- why was there need for a housekeep? The woman's marks running along her cheeks caught my eye.

"If you would, sit here while I fetch her. Also, my name is Inuzuka Tsume. I apologize for not saying so a moment ago." Without letting me say anything else, she walked out of the room, to the next over. I sat on one of the two couches in the room and glanced around; it was still clean from here. _Are these people neat freaks or something? OCD, maybe? Are people of the Inuzuka clan overly uptight? _

"Well, hello there!" I looked up to a girl that appeared maybe around my age, with the same odd markings on her cheeks as her mothers and that fellow I met a while back in town. _I thought his name was Kiba, but I wasn't sure. _I smiled politely and extended my right hand to her, "I'm Himura, Minami."

"Inuzuka, Hana. It's a pleasure," Hana shook my hand then sat on the couch opposite of me. "I'd just like to ask you a few questions, nothing too stressful. Let's get right to it, shall we?" She wiggled in her seat and grabbed a notebook from the table between she and I, and scribbled something down with pencil.

"What's your date of birth and age?"

"October seventh, nineteen years old."

"Your home village?"

"Leaf."

"Ninja or non-ninja and rank, if so?"

"Ninja, chuunin."

"Your experience with housekeep, cooking, and cleaning?"

"I've always been big on cleaning and organization ever since I was small. It doesn't bother me to stop and make sure things are neat. I'm patient and use my time deliberately in what I do. Cooking is a passion of mine- I was aspire to learn more recipes and alternative ways to make the unhealthy foods healthy." Sooo, ninety-nine percent of that was a lie. I'd _never_ been big on cleaning or organization. It _did_ bother me to stop for every little thing to make sure things are neat and where they should be. I was _far_ from patient, and I _didn't_ use my time deliberately or productively most of the time. I did like cooking though! Hana took a moment to write more things down. She paused, the asks, "Are you a people-person?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"What is your ideal pay for this job, along side expected hours?"

"My ideal pay... well, I'd like to meet the national minimum wage at least, but the hours I'm not too picky about."

"Alright. I think you're suitable for the job! Would you be able to start tomorrow, Minami-san?" I nodded excitedly, "That's perfect!"

"Alright, well, before you go, what I expect of you is to be here every day from nine to nine-thirty in the morning till eight or so at night. Those are your hours except on holidays or other occasions. I will need you just to go through the house, make sure everything is in order in general. My little brother is usually home around lunch time, so fix him something by two o' clock. Then fix dinner at six-thirty- have it on the table no later, no sooner. Make sure the food is warm, unless it's a cold dish. Nothing unhealthy; but from what you said, that shouldn't be a problem. Once a day, water the flowers around the house with the watering can on the front porch. Hmm.. I think that's all. Got it?"

"Yes, ma'am!" I saluted her and smiled.

* * *

"Hidan..." Himeko looked around and groaned loudly. She changed into her human form not only moments ago; her petite fingers ran through her silvery, glistening hair. "You already know she's pissed off at you."

"She didn't really seem pissed. Did you see the way she reacted?" Hidan questioned her. The princess rolled her eyes, then admires the towering buildings surrounding. "It's called shock."

"Shock? What the hell does that have to do with anything? Quit being a retarded, Hime-san," he grumbled.

"Retarded?" Himeko yelled in a piercing tone. She gawked at him and grabbed his shirt in a fist. "You fucking asshole, I'm trying to help you regain the love of your life!"

"She's not the love of my life," He pushed her aways and walked onward. The princess fixes her tiara, "Says you! What the hell's gotten your panties in a wad, Hidan? Did something happen to make you act like this?"

"No. I just... can't look at her in any other way than just an acquaintance. Jashinists are made to look at everyone like that," he replied. Himeko crossed her arms and caught up to him, walking at his side. "I can tell when something's changed with you. You aren't that hard to read, Hidan."

"Then tell me what the fuck I'm thinking if you're that goddamn clever, you snobby ass princess," Hidan mumbled. Oddly his tone wasn't as loud as usual.

"You aren't thinking anything because you're too pissed off. That's what," she said while cleaning her nails.

"Well, that's a load."

* * *

This chapter was a bit iffy, I knooow. I'm trying to get into things. I've been using that as an excuse for a while now, huh? xD  
Well, there's a new poll up on my page. I just want your opinions. And right below the poll, there's a note that says: Another note* Since I didn't get to do what I was planning to for the anniversary of_ It's Beginning to Get to Me_ due to lack of time, **I'll be taking requests for a short time, if anyone wants something written for them. **If you want to send in a request, tell what fandom, what characters you want to be used, the rating, content hoped for, etc. I'm a bit limited on what fields I write on, but if you send suggestions, I'll tell you if I can do it confidently or not. Also, these will be one-shots, unless there's great demand for more or if I suddenly am inspired to continue it. Of course, it'll always remain dedicated to you. It wouldn't surprise me if I don't get any requests, but I figured I'd try to make it up to you guys for my absence and everything else I'm sorry about, lmfao.  
I've already started the next chapter, and I can assure it'll be better than this one. I have something up my sleeve. Also, I'm editing chapters _big time_sometime soon; if you have any criticism at all, lay it on me, harsh or not. Thank you for reading this all the way through, whether you're a regular reader or not.

Thanks for reading!


	16. I Spy Your Cancer

**Please** vote in my page poll or in a review/pm, tell me if you think "Rose-coloured Glasses" is a better suiting title than the original title "It's Beginning to Get to Me" or not. I want your opinion- it matters to me!  
Anyway, like I said last chapter, I'll be replying reviews in the author notes from now on. For the five I received:

_Miku Udahara_, thank you so much! I'm glad you like the story! Also, I appreciate your consecutive reviews. You're really encouraging- seriously.  
_Xxyangxx2006_, I'm making it up as I'm going, that's all I have to say. Ahaha, thanks much!  
_The Dramatic Violet Myles_, I'm certainly working on it; thank you!  
_AnimefanxD_, ahh, thanks! That's too cute! "MinaxMadara" :D  
_Rii-chan717_, thanks for the support! I have it for you now!

Wow. I'm really lagging on updates. Kinda sad, huh? Ahh, me. I'm sitting here eating saltines and drinking sweet tea, so I'm not sweating it much. Here's this chapter, readers!  
I've honestly been trying to clean this story up. It's sort of ridiculous- some of the stuff I just typed down. I never noticed how Mary Sue-ish Mina is, or all of the typos and mess ups I constantly have... Hopefully it's all better than it was. -.-

Enjoy~

* * *

"You're so fucking back and forth on everything. Either give 'Jashin-sama' the finger and tell Mina what's up, or tell Mina what's up and that you can't talk to her." Himeko's delicate brow knitted together unhappily. "You're being unfair and playing with her heart."

"Save the shit, Hime-chan, I'm not playing with her heart..." Hidan trailed off, "Besides if there's a heart being played with here, it's mine. I'm a _Jashinist _anyways_._ I'm built to blow everything I see to smithereens, not kiss and hug, even if there's something I 'like'; Mina knows that."

"So, that means you're choosing the second option," Himeko muttered, "You weren't built to kill everything and everyone; you had to choose to be this way, just as you have to choose between what you have to now." Hidan's face fell into a grimace, but he didn't say anything for once. He shot the girl a glance, then looked away to the village surrounding.

"You keep belittling me as the man I am!" Hidan yelled, flustered and red-faced. "Don't treat me like some love-struck child! I do-"

"All she wants is you. True, she has some little fling going on with Tobi and she... sorta had something with Deidara, but none of it was genuine. I swear it. If you'd just talk to her, I'm sure it would end in your favor," Himeko said, then added, "Job searching. That's what we're here for. Let's get it over with already."

* * *

I looked at the large house behind me once more before walking into the maze of town. The skies grew deeper shades of gray as minutes passed lethargically. What a weird ass day.

"Mina-san! Oi, Mina-san, over here!" I looked, eyes a bit wide, to the left and stop walking. Naruto waved frantically and gave the the sign to wait for him. Instead of bounding around like usual, he was carefully inching over while blowing on a cup of something that was steaming lightly, said vapor twisting gracefully into the air. He approached me finally and smiled, satisfied.

"Hey, Naruto. What's up?" I asked, trying to seem as if I was in a half-decent mood, "And what's that- coffee?"

"Egh, no! Coffee blows. Gives you bad breath, too. This is hot chocolate with mini marshmallows in it- one of my favorites! That small bakery I told you about before is having a little special on it since winter is coming around soon. Oh, try some- hurry! But don't hurry too quickly, you might burn your tongue," Naruto rambled, cautiously passing the cup to me. I looked at it with pursed lips, hoping it wouldn't taste badly. I giae a ginger blow on it, then sipped on the drink before spewing it out again and sticking my tongue out to cool it off. The roof of my mouth burned, too- just great!

"Oh... Mina-san... are you alright? Maybe I should've blown on it longer..." The blonde boy scratched the back of his head sheepishly. I handed him the cup and shook my head, trying to relieve his guilt. "It tasted good for the record..."

"Well, that's good!" He perked up a bit, "You should come with me so I can introduce you to some of my friends!"

I smiled sadly, thinking of how he wouldn't want me around if he knew I was part of the Akatsuki. "Maybe another time, Naruto. Next week, possibly? I have to run for now. See ya 'round." I gave his hair a good scruffle and he agreed as I walked off.

* * *

Apparently, Hidan and Himeko had beaten me back to the base and had prepared a surprise for me that they knew I would _not_ like. The three of us were the only presences of life lingering in the base.

"I hate to do this to you, Mina... but said matter needs to be settled. Don't hate me, okay?" She asked quietly. I stood in the threshold still confused. I followed her into the common room and sat on one of the couches after she asked me to. The princess sat on the coffee table in front of me, and the two of us shared looks for a moment before she started. "Well... we've never talked about this sort of thing, so it'll be weird. Either way, even if we haven't, I see into your soul because I'm your guardian. I know how you feel inside, I know when you're hurting, and I know... well, I know you, alright?" She paused long enough for me to nod, signaling my understanding.

"Now, this will sound harsh but... you have to stop scouting guys for comfort, okay?" She asked. My jaw ultimately dropped. She really honestly was telling me that I was interested in too many men... I had to admit, I never saw this day coming.

"I know what you're thinking, I have to no authority to say any of this shit, but girl, even though your dad was never around, it doesn't mean you can do this- go and get attention from every guy you can. You can't lead these people on." I swallowed and held the breath I'd took to scrutinize the ground. She really could see inside me, couldn't she?

"Just because a guy looks your way doesn't mean _anything._ You're gorgeous- a pretty girl- but even though you haven't actually fucked anyone, you need to keep that beauty for one person the best you can help it, y'know? I saw the way you looked at Deidara, and I see how you look at Tobi. Mina-chan... you need to hold you heart inside yourself. Get it off of your sleeve already. Was that too mean?" She muttered the last part almost silently with a wince.

I shook my head, denying the question. "It's just..." I could feel tears brimming my eyes, and I knocked myself in the head to try to focus on the pain rather than my thoughts.

"H-hey, don't do that, Mina-chan..." Himeko stood up and held my hand in hers, pulling me up into a hug.

"How did I even fool myself this hard? Fuckin'... how..." I gripped her shirt, and I realized how absolutely ridiculous I'd been this whole time. "I want to feel loved." She tangled her fingers in my hair as she listened attentively, waiting for me to gather myself. "You've known all along where you're heart really is, Mina-chan, and that can get you what you feel that you need."

_Knock, knock, knock. _

Himeko and I staggered back, thinking of who would actually knock on the _Akatsuki's_ door. This wasn't right. I lightly sprinted to the door and peeked through the peephole. I spun around and mouthed to the princess to get Hidan and hide. Confused, I opened the door and gazed to the outer world.

"Mina-san! I thought you I saw you out around here before..." Naruto said, holding his chin thoughtfully while observing the house.

"No! I mean- no, I don't come here regularly. This my... aunt's house. She hates guests, and she's not afraid to put a smack down on a young whippersnapper," I mused, pointing at him. He blinked blankly and and looked to the side. "Oh, okay, I won't come again; but I wanted to talk about something to you..."

"It's fine, Naruto-san! Umm, we should walk," I suggested, and he followed while glancing around suspiciously. I crossed my arms under the cool breeze, "So, what's up?"

"Well... don't freak out, but some of our ANBU recruits were fighting with four assassins around here, and they never found out where they went off to. I just want to be sure you and your aunt will be okay, y'know?" He asked, tucking his hands in his pockets. That took me a bit aback, I had to admit. "A-assassins? From where?"

"We can't figure it out. For a while, we thought they were Orochimaru's recruits, but that's now highly doubted... we're even unsure of why they're here. I don't know all of the knitty-gritty details if there's more to know, but I know enough to warn you," Naruto said quietly.

"Thank you for mentioning it at the least," I replied, "I'll definitely be on my toes."

_"Mina, get back to the base immediately," _Leader spoke to me with his telepathic-mind-justu junk. I straightened and rummaged through my head for an excuse to run off- again.

"Mina-san, are you alright? You don't look too good," Naruto said, squinting his eyes at me.

"I left a cake in the oven! I'll see you later, Naruto-san, for sure!" I yelled and ran off to the base. I burst through the door and locked it behind me. Leader wasn't far and upon seeing me, he smiled a bit. "Nice too see you're listening for a change, Mina-chan." I jutted my lip out at him and walked passed him into the threshold of the common room. "So, what was it that you needed me back here for then?" Upon turning into said room, I found everyone present, other than Itachi, Zetsu, Sasori, and Deidara. Kisame came back for some reason? That was odd.

"Everyone, please settle down," Leader called sternly. Most did so. The man continued, "We're going to begin buckling down on the bijuu. There is no longer any room for failure, and if failure results, major consequences will take place. I will assign these bijuu personally before the end of the day. Dismissed." Leader walked out of the room, likely walking to his "central room." Once he disappeared, I followed after trying to act nonchalant; I didn't want to take chances of the assassins following after. Leader walked in the door and before he shut it. I pushed inside as well.

"Minami-san?" He questioned a bit confused. I laughed sheepishly and greeted him. "I need to tell you something that the nine-tailed bijuu passed onto me." He raised a brow. I guessed that was his eager face...

"Naruto said that there have been assassins in the village- no one knows why they're around, where they're from. He was telling me to keep an eye out and that the ANBU would do the same the best they could," I said.

"Don't be stupid, Mina!" Leader spoke in a loud outburst. I faltered a bit and gulped nervously. Leader made a silent snapping motion to grab my attention and then winked, signifying he wasn't serious. Someone had to have been listening. "I'm tired of your ridiculous propositions. It's near time you've been taken care of." I focused my chakra for a moment and realized people were outside the door. I held a hand sign and a clone of myself popped up. I nodded to her and Leader kept yelling random words. I searched and searched for somewhere to hide, then settled for beneath his desk. I curled into a small ball, listening to the angered man until there was a gasp from my clone, then a shrill scream. I peaked under the small crack at the bottom of the desk and saw my clone pooled in blood. Leader walked out and was met by Kaito and Kazue. They acted surprised and talked about how they couldn't believe I still hadn't trusted them, even up to the very last moment.

"It matters not. I need you and your squad to hunt down a bijuu though, on another note. Come with me," Leader said, leading them out of the room. I performed another hand sign, using the Bikou Justu and looked at my hand, clearly see-through. I crawled over to the clone on the floor which appeared brutally murdered. I winced, realizing that's how I would look dead... it was horrible. Whenever I made then clone, I tried putting more chakra into it, so once it was hit, it was like a time bomb.

_Poof!_ I smiled at the good timing and stood, gazing through the door which was already a bit ajar. I peaked into the hall, then backed up as fast as possible, seeing Tobi run in quickly to look around. He shut the door quietly and looked in my direction. "Good job, Mina-chan. Leader told me what you two are up to." I laughed slightly not really thinking of the plan, more of the talk I earlier had with Himeko. "Ah, ha, yeah... sorta funny, huh?"

"Is something wrong?" Tobi asked curiously. He hopped to my side and put his masked face close. I looked around nervously and deactivated my jutsu. "N-no, I'm fine."

"Oh," he backed up a bit, holding up a finger, "You're upset over the 'leading guys on' thing, aren't you?"

"Are you calling me a whore?" I asked in horror. Had Tobi- no, had _Madara-_ honestly implied that? Tobi took his mask off to reveal a totally concerned face. "Of course not, Mina-chan... why would I say that? You're an obvious virgin. You can't really be a whore with such criteria... I know about the talk you had with Himeko is all." My face fell. So, if I weren't a virgin, I'd be considered a whore, and Tobi somehow knew about the touchy talk I had earlier. Where the fuck was my personal privacy? "How do you even know about that...?"

"I know everything that goes on around here, Silly," Tobi said, tipping my nose, "It's not that hard to read you either. You aren't seriously interested in me."

"M-Madara-kun..." I started, waiting for the little damn holding my tears back to re-patch itself, "I do-"

"No, stop. I'm not upset. You don't realize how old I am," Tobi proposized with a laugh, "Sadly, I knew this wouldn't work- _we_ wouldn't. True, I take a huge liking to you, and we can remain as close as we have, but we were and are never going anywhere. Our lifestyles are very... different from one another's." I guessed that was what set it off and had me sniffling like a little kid. "I think- I think that I shouldn't even be here at this stupid place anymore."

"How so?" He asked, watching me swipe at oncoming tears, "Because... all I do is wreck things. Not really for you guys but more for myself. All the fuck I want is to feel like someone actually gives a damn about me, and then I get sucked into shit like this that I never should've even started. It never should've started at all with my mother and father- I'm just one huge fuck up." Tobi shook his head and put his mask back on, "A silly way of thinking, you have. I can't change your thoughts, but that's very untrue. I knew from the start where your heart was at and how you were feeling, and I felt the same. We both still feel the same, but it's nothing to reprimand your being over. You need to start realizing that you have more than you think. You've been in this organization for a while- do you really believe no one thinks well of you?" I stayed silent and glanced at him every so often.

"You have a family of sorts here, don't you?" Tobi asked. That caught my attention- I'd always thought that before... but maybe instead of waiting for these people to put out and accept me, I had to be the first to show that it was okay to come close. "You're right, Madara-kun... thank you for that." I could feel a satisfied smile radiate from him and he welcomed me.

It was weird how that just happened...

* * *

"Well done performance back there, Mina-san," Leader called to me with a simple smirk. I nodded, "Same goes to you, Leader-sama!" This was going to make Akatsuki meeting number two.

"Alright, alright, everyone. Settle," Leader ordered. I walked over to one of the couches and stood in front of Kakuzu and Hidan. I glared at Kakuzu boredly, asking him to scoot over. He scooted away from Hidan. I smacked my forehead. "No, scoot the other way!" Kakuzu watched me with suspicion and Hidan did so as well, shooting Kakuzu an odd look. I sat down happily and told the green-eyed man hello.

"I've been informed of a misunderstanding. The assassins, Kazue, Kaito, Megumi, and Kazuki aren't what they say the are. Claiming to be from the Sound Village, the-"

"Well, that's already wrong," Suigetsu said loudly with crossed arms and squinted eyes, "I would'a said something had I known they've been claiming to be from Otogakure."

"The idiot's right; the Sound Village is very tightly knit- everyone knows everyone, and I'd never seen any of those four till we joined here," Karin added. Suigetsu flipped her off for calling names, and she walked over to him to pop him in the cheek; just watching made the large bruise on my face sting. Leader grew quiet for a moment, "The assassins are under the impression that Minami was murdered by myself, so do _not_ give away her position. She heard from the kyuubi that assassins have been out around in town, and the ANBU is keeping strict watch on them- they have not kept secrecy; this leads me to wonder of the intruders that the assassins brought into the base 'accidentally' not long ago. Something has gone amiss here... all I can say for now is to be ready for anything. A fight may spring at random, and we cannot afford to lose one another." A small bustle rose among us, and Konan stood to make her raised, petite hand seen. "What about Deidara and Sasori, Leader-sama?"

"That... is a matter I'm still clearly unsure of. Their departure took place a bit of a while ago to the Land of Demons... And the-"

"What if the assassins are_ from_ the Land of Demons?" Kakuzu asked lowly. A silence rained down upon us.

"There's a really good chance of that," Leader replied.

* * *

I'm finally back! I have ideas of what's to come and, just, yayayay.  
I'm a happy girly right now.  
If you have any suggestions or whatever, tell me!  
Also, please review! Give opinions so I can make this story better!

Seventeen will be up asap. :)


	17. Fuck Jobs, Give Oral

Well... I didn't get any reviewers last chapter... so no review responses this time around. ;_; Please, you guys; review. I sorta need advice/criticism/encouragement. As horrible as that sounds. Eh, whatever.

The plot is reeeeaally starting to unfold in this chapter!

Oh, and another note, I've decided if I do ever end up putting a lemon in this story, it'll be its own chapter. I know I have a couple of readers that don't like them, considering the results from a poll I took a bit back. That reminds me, please vote in my current poll! :3

I know a few of you will for sure enjoy this chapter.

Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

The next morning, Konan woke me up around eight in the morning like I'd asked her the previous night. Today was my first day of work, and I wouldn't let myself be late- partly because it would be a horrible first impression, but mostly because Hana's mom would probably hunt me down, skin me and make me into a trophy coat for her dogs. I groggily got ready for the day and dressed in the pair of pants I had along with the shirt to match that were worn beneath the Akatsuki cloak. I strapped my kunai holster and shuriken pouch and pulled my normal ankle-length zori on, and I made my way to the kitchen. I opened the door of the refrigerator and stared inside of it straight-faced for a while before shutting it again.

"I'm off, Konan-chan!" I yelled before leaving. Konan popped into sight, waving me out. "Go, go! Make us some good money, Mina-chan! Good luck!" I walked out of the home, locking it behind me. Then I saw the trees again. Colorful at first, turning into a barrier of green which surrounded the village gates. Upon arriving at the Inuzuka home, I checked the little paper that Teuchi had given me, making sure I was at the right place; all of the surrounding houses looked identical. I shrugged and walked to the door. A small note taped to the door read:

_Mina,_

_I left a key for you under the rug; it's yours to keep and use whenever it's needed. I had to leave the house early today for an urgent mission, though, I had planned on meeting you at the start of the day. Anyhow, help yourself to the house. I should be back soon, but if not, my mom and little brother Kiba will be home later in case you need anything._

_Thank you,_

_Hana_

I grabbed the old-fashioned looking key from beneath the rug and the little letter before entering the house and tucked them into my pocket. I took a whiff and winced, not remembering how strongly it had smelled of dog. I let myself fall onto the couch, then glanced around. It was still spotless, like it had been the previous day. What were they expecting me to do here...? Time passed slowly, but since Hana said to help myself to the house, I fixed myself a decent meal and later watered the flowers toward the middle of the day. I even squatted in front of the flower beds and talked to them for a while about nothing in particular.

"Umm... what are you doing?"

My eyes widened as I gasped in horror, feeling my soul nearly leave my body. I twitched, turning to the person behind me in annoyance.

"Oi, Mina-san, it's you!" Kiba realized. Akamaru barked and tackled me making sure to lick every part of my face possible. Kiba cleared his throat in embarrassment and Akamaru returned to his side once more. I laid on the ground feeling disgusting and I groaned. Kiba apologized for his dog and helped me up.

"Egh, you're home early! I don't even have lunch made yet..." I muttered as we walked into the house.

"I already ate anyways; I'll just say you made a salad or something like that," Kiba offered. I hopped onto my tiptoes with stars in my eyes, "So, you'll make it seem as if I'm a great housekeeper?"

"Oh, umm, sure," he replied, "That's not hard. The house isn't destroyed, so you have to be at least decent." I scratched the back of of my head and shrugged.

Not long after, Hana walked in. If only Kiba had persuaded her better. By the end of the night, I was ripped into shreds upon hearing "Well... looks a bit dusty in here", "Dinner was a little chilly even though it's supposed to be warm", "There's a paw print on the rug you neglected to tend to", and many, many other things I hadn't applied myself toward, in her words. Head hanging low, I left the Inuzuka compound with Kiba apologizing profusely for his sister's pickiness. _There went that job..._

* * *

I walked into the Akatsuki base and slammed the door behind me. It grew louder as I progressed through the halls of the home, and I sighed whenever I laid on my bed, hoping to get some rest. Suddenly, I felt a prodding at my back, and I sat up quickly, confused.

"Sheesh, I can't breathe when you smother me with your back!" Ran mewled crazily. I formed an "o" with my mouth and picked her up gingerly. "Sorry, Ran-chan; why're you sleeping in here, anyways?"

"Nya? Oh, well, because it's too loud in the common room where I usually sleep. It's not hard to get comfortable, being so small in this form, but damnit, I can't take the noise..." She covered her stuffed ears with her nubby paws. "So, tell me: how was the job?" I groaned and rubbed my face in disappointment, "I got fired... I somehow was the worst housekeeper possible..." Ran meowed harshly about said matter, but I ignored her, really. I thought hard before asking this, and when I did, it stopped Ran right in her tracks.

"Whenever you were talking about guys yesterday... why did you only mention Tobi and Deidara if you can read me like a book?"

"Wh-what do you mean, Mina-chan?" She asked quietly.

"I'd always taken a liking to Hidan," I started, "Though I never wanted to admit it; but you didn't refer to him at all. You must not really be my guardian angel if you couldn't see that." Ran deadpanned, "Mina-chan... you can be such an idiot sometimes..." I gave the kitten a crosshurt glare and waited for her to explain.

"I only said something _because_ of that stupid Jashinist!" She exclaimed in a manner of matter-of-fact, "Silly little girl..." I jutted my lip out at the name and pondered her words carefully. "So..." And just like that, a light bulb flashed over my head. "I'll be back, Ran-chan!" I ran out of the room and felt a nervous tingle swirling in my stomach. Ran sat on my bed before transforming into her normal form; said girl smiled, shaking her head and walked to the empty common room, which was lacking any sort of noise contrary to what she'd told me. I glared at the door. I'd never been really scared of something like this, but it was taking a toll. I could've swore I was having a cold sweat. With a deep breath, I knocked on the door and peeped inside to find both men present. Blood rushed to my face upon catching both of their stares, and I shut the door behind me after walking in.

"Umm... I have to apologize for yesterday, Hidan," I muttered while messing with a lock of hair. Said man simply watched me with an odd expression. I continued, "I shouldn't be upset if you're not interested in me or anything, y'know... it was kin-"

"What the hell if she even talking about, idiot?" Kakuzu asked, shooting the immortal a dirty glare. Hidan flicked him off and crossed his arms, "Nothing, fucking nosy bitch..."

"Well, it must be some sort of bullshit for her to think you're uninterested," Kakuzu mused- laughed even- "Everyone knows that's no-"

"Could you shut the fuck up for once, you old miser? I can take care of my own problems! You know what? Get the hell out, anyways!" Hidan ordered, sneering with a feral spirit. Kakuzu grabbed his suitcase, muttering something about a bounty, and left the room. That was when it became way too quiet for my liking. I looked down at my toes intently, waiting for this moment to pass away; maybe I'd wake up and none of this had even happened!

"Mina-chan," Hidan said quietly, walking to me to take hold of my wrist, "You really have alot to figure out, don't you? I only said that yesterday because Hime was pissing me off. Were you really upset?" I shifted my weight from leg to leg, trying to word things alright. I decided I'd just be plainly blunt. "Yes."

"Well..." Hidan rubbed his neck regretfully, "I'm... sorry that you took it wrong. You know I fuck around alot of the time..." Our vision connected with one another's, and they stayed it way a moment. I walked passed him and stood on his bed, to jump and look out of the high window. Hidan didn't know what to do but walk over to watch.

"I wonder if Jashin likes me," I said. I could tell he certainly wasn't expecting that statement and when I pulled my own Jashinist pendant from beneath my shirt, he held it silently before replying, "Yeah. You could become a Jashinist, y'know?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively with his normal Hidan's-an-ass smirk.

"Do you like me?" I questioned, ignoring his suggestion. He didn't move his head but glanced from the necklace to me, slumping in defeat, "I would've guessed you'd figured it out by now."

That was all I really needed to hear to justify what I'd always wanted to do for months on end now. I held his face in my hands and smothered my lips onto his, and in a shy sort of demeanor I'd never imagine him to have, he gingerly hooked his arms around my waist and kept them there even after we parted. I was shaking, and I didn't have to check to know that for sure. He pulled me down off of his bed and looked me straight in the eye. "It was about time you did that." I smiled at him, blushing, and he kissed me again, lingering there.

When the door was opened, Hidan didn't comply to pulling away, even when I flailed my arms around like an idiot.

"Stupid kids..." Kakuzu muttered, leaving once more. When Hidan released me, I gasped for air and glared at him as he laughed hysterically, enough to bring tears to his eyes. I stuck my nose in the air and held my hips. "You're such a jerk sometimes..."

* * *

"So, it's clear then, in any event that we will have to do something about this in little time," Leader thought aloud. We were in the middle of _another _meeting, but that wasn't really what I was focusing on. I fidgeted on the couch of the common room, struggling to pay some sort of attention to the man.

_"I'm proud of you for once, Mina!" I said to myself, "You listened to Hime, Hidan in a sense, but mostly to yourself. Isn't this what you've wanted for a long time? It is! Mina, you kissed Hidan... the sex god, Hidan! DO IT AGAIN!" _I shook my head at myself and looked down upon feeling Hidan's hand rest by my own.

"You aren't very slick, are you?" I asked, amused. He shifted his eyes down to me in an over-the-nose sort of way. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Your hand?" I gestured. He gazed at said object and turned a tad red in the cheeks, "What the fuck ever, I don't even know what you're talking about. I just put my goddamn hand down, woman..."

"You know what? Fuck you, asshole," I grumbled; we both looked away from one another, and I put my hand atop his, partially lacing our fingers. Leader cleared his throat, gaining our attention in a stern manner, but his face fell a little in surprise. "Are you two... holding hands...?"

"Pff, it's was Hidan's idea," I muttered, glancing aside, yanking my hand into my chest.

"Bullshit, you just grabbed my hand," Hidan demanded, flipping me off. It grew immensely quiet, all eyes on the immortal and I.

"Yeah, but you liked it!" I yelled, sweatdropping and shrinking under the stares. Hidan's brow twitched and when he began saying another word, I grabbed his cloak sleeve and pulled him behind me out of the room into the hall. I spun around and saw him with arms crossed, unhappy and flustered. I laughed, throwing him off guard and smiled.

"You want my dick, don't'cha?" Hidan asked, winking. I punched him in the jaw and huffed. "Not true." Hidan adjusted his jaw, wincing in annoyance, "True."

"Not."

"True."

"Not."

"True~!"

"Fuckin' fuck you, okay?"

"YOU ADMITTED IT! Mina-chan wants to fuck me, Mina-chan wants to fuck me~!" The man did a miniature dance then ruffled my hair and slapped my ass, "Sorry, girly; maybe later though..." With a surprised squeak, blood raced into my cheeks where it pooled immensely. Hidan laughed and cocked his head at me with a clever, long grin. He pulled me by the waist to him. "I don't know if you'd be able to stand it though; I like it fuckin' rough as hell."

"I-I can too stand it! And I can stand it better than anyone else!" The Jashinist's mouth dropped in shock, "Oh, really?"

"Yes!" I said in frustration.

"What are you two..." Suigetsu trailed off in suspicion. Our eyes shot to said boy, and he staggered back some. "You guys_ were_ actually holding hands? It's odd, thinking of how you're S-ranked criminals, but it's even weirder to think that you, Mina-san, _like Hidan?_ He's a flat out bitch! His was _bitch**made**_!" I sweatdropped and rubbed my neck with Hidan raging, clenching a fist at him. "Mina-chan, are you ju-"

"He may indeed be a bitch, but he is indeed my bitch, Suigetsu," I muttered sheepishly, "I guess I can't really deny it anymore." Hidan straightened up a bit, gazing suggestively at me. "We'll see who's bitch is who's..."

"OH GOD, MY BRAIN!" The young male grabbed his head, sickened, "THE IMAGES BURN!" I rolled my eyes and simply walked back into the awkward-aired common room, the Jashinist following.

"-so, that being said, I suppose it's settled. This plan must not fail at any costs. The climax of the Akatsuki's purpose is coming to dawn," Leader spoke, "You all know what must be done." I scratched my head. "Well... I don't..." The man deeply exhaled, "Your role isn't currently necessary. For now, you simply have to make sure you aren't found out by the assassins."

"And that means if you're gonna have sex like no tomorrow, you take it somewhere else where you won't be found out and so we don't have to listen to that shit!" Suigetsu unhappily called from the hall. I blushed as I shifted nervously where I stood, and Hidan stared at the wall like the words flew in one ear and out the other.

_"So... NOW YOU'RE GONNA KISS HIM, RIGHT?" I poked at myself._

"Mina-chan, the assassins are currently being sent to Suna. I suggest staying on your toes though; the last time they were sent off for a bijuu, they brought intruders in," Leader reminded.

"And the intruders are suspected to be from Konoha, so it would rightly stand to reason that they probably didn't and aren't going after bijuu," Kakuzu added. That realization didn't settle well with me. They had to be up to something really weird.

"If Naruto said that the ANBU will be watching this part of the forest, doesn't that mean we should, like... leave? Something?" I asked. Leader studied me, "If they're out and about, we can't risk leaving. They aren't looking for us anyways, just those four."

"Then if they break through the house with idiot Konoha shinibo following, it'd be best to hide than fight them?" Leader's mouth twitched at my words, "For now, yes. Could you quit whining?" I pouted with arms crossed.

"There are remaining three bijuu left that are not in our possession- one in Kumo, one here in Konoha, and one in Iwa," Leader announced, "And to go over who has what: Kisame, you must go to Iwa to obtain the Four-tailed Ape; Sasuke and company, you are to go to Iwa for the Five-tailed Whale Horse; and Mina, carefully, you are to lure the Nine-tailed Fox in. _Very_ carefully, let me emphasize. Himeko-san may join if she wishes."

"Nya! Yay, something to do!" Ran squeaked in joy, "I'll have to manage my job and help all at once, but that'll be a breeze for someone like me." The immortal by me coughed, disagreeing.

"Are you calling me stupid?" The small stuffed cat arched her back at him and pounced onto Kakuzu's head, launching to attach to his face. Ignoring feral cat hisses the best he could, Leader pinched the bridge of his nose. "Enough already. Begin your missions before nightfall." Kakuzu glared at the cat for a moment before returning to his money-management magazine.

"Mina-chan!" Ran yelled, now in the doorway, "Get your ass over here!" I did so, mouth falling with each step.

"Tell your little boyfriend here that he needs to respect me!" She demanded. Hidan scratched his cheek in annoyance.

"I don't think what I say will really matter much, Ran-chan..." I muttered, "Besides, just because we... kind of kissed... doesn't mean that we're all... cutesy-pootsy now..."

"Really now? I figured you guys would be, like... hardcore fucking already," Ran whispered in surprise.

"_Ran-chan!_" I stomped a foot childishly, blushing like mad, "A kiss is a kiss! Not a free ride to fuckland!"

"It's not?" Hidan popped in, "Eh, it doesn't matter. I have a free ride anyway." The small cat piped up and began mewling crazily; my brow twitched and an evil murmur escaped me. "What makes you so sure?"

"Aww, look'it wittle Mina-chan try'na be scary," he pinched my face, "You know what makes me sure, Sweetcheeks. I can see it in your eyes." He bent down some and batted his eyelashes in mock innocence. I placed a hand on his shoulder and kicked him in the crotch without hesitance. Ran hopped with a hiss when he suddenly staggered her way. I rubbed my hands together, "I guess we won't have to worry about it for a while then, hm, Hidan?"The Jashinist was bent over, taking deep breaths. He shakily beckoned to me, "Y-you're so lucky I don't feel pain the same way other people do, you little bitch..." I winked at him and tossed my hair over my shoulder. I glanced around seeing Ran had walked off to somewhere.

"Fine, fine, Hidan. I owe you for that one," I sighed, "You heal up pretty fast, right? Just tell me when you're feeling better."

"Why does it have to be after I feel better?

... _"Oh, shit, Mina! Now's your chance to show Hidan that you're not a prissy little virgin that doesn't know what to do!" _I bit my lip nervously, him watching, and purposely licked a finger with a suggestive gaze. Hidan's cheeks turned a bit pink, "M-Mina-chan, you aren't as much of a prude as I thought!" I shrugged my shoulders and turned to continue down the hall, thinking of Hidan's surprised reaction. Oh, and how exactly to even give a good blowjob... _my life as a prude. _I stopped quickly, seeing Suigetsu not far away, with a disgusted face barely peeping into view. I facepalmed and smacked him upside the head upon walking by.

* * *

I made myself comfortable on my mattress and pulled Icha Icha Tactics open in my lap. Surely there had to be something about giving a guy oral in here. I mean, a guy wrote it! There had to be! I flipped through and through, checking chapters and all. Nothing. I could have asked Konan or Himeko, but that'd be way too embarrassing, and there was no way I could ask anyone else in the base. Especially if there was a risk Hidan would hear about it. I didn't want to seem like a goody-two-shoes- surely that'd turn Hidan off. I fell back, squinting my eyes unhappily at the ceiling. "This is too complicated... I could practice on a... banana... but how awkward would that be?" I groaned and rolled onto my stomach, shoving the book back into my backpack. I pushed myself up onto my knees. There was only one thing to do.

After leaving the base with pack on my back, I neared the Konoha gates. The village was even more gorgeous at night- all of the lights shone with a subtle, warming brilliance. Walking passed Ichiraku's. It was a good thing I remembered where that place was; I gauged all of my directions from that point. Soon, I found the small book shop Kakashi and I had visited not long ago. The small, frail little lady tending the place fingered a page of a book herself at the register. Shyly, I moved behind a a bookshelf to avoid her gaze. I touched the spine of books and the occasional scroll. Weapons, herbs, jutsu, taijutsy- DID THESE NINJA NOT HAVE SEXUAL LIVES?

"Can I help you, young'n?"

I jumped, stiffening at once. The old lady standing a few inches shorter than myself gave me a wrinkled grin.

"Umm, n-n-no, I think I-I'm okay, ma'am," I sputtered. Her eyes remained closed, reminding me of a sly fox in a sense, "Oh, I know what you're looking for. Come with me." She grabbed my wrist and pulled me to an adjacent bookshelf. "Here you are." I examined the genre label which read "Intimacy/Relations."

"WH-WHAT? Old Lady, what do you take me for?" I yelled, taken aback. She giggled evilly, "You have a man to impress, ne?" My anger subsided and I nervously poked my pointer fingers together, looking away. "How can you tell? Is it written all over my face?"

"Maybe for someone like me," she replied, arms crossed, "You can call it intuition." I raised an eyebrow at her suspiciously then glowered down at the books, the first title I saw being "Sex 101: Do's and Don'ts." Grabbing the book, I scanned the back and a few pages as well.

"You're the girl that wondered by here with that Kakashi not long ago, ne?" Geez, this woman said "ne?" alot. I nodded, "I am."

"Thought you were a little familiar. Well, if that's the book you want, I'll get'cha checked out on yonder," she said, scooting to the register. I followed after and handed her the item.

"I'll give to ya on the house," she spoke. My eyes lit up and I smiled hugely. "Really?"

"No," I deadpanned hearing this, "I have bills to pay, young'n." I sighed and handed her the money, thanking her.

"Tell me how your little fling goes," she called, knowing it'd thoroughly embarrass me. I flipped the finger and scurried away, putting my new book in my bag. Just as I went to throw it over my shoulders, the bag was snatched from my hands. I blinked for a moment, realizing what'd happened, then took after running after the thief. He had to be a ninja, too, judging the way he ran, jumping from roof top to roof top. I gritted my teeth, squinting and struggling to keep his image. He was a fairly slender man with longer, light blonde hair- that's all I really managed to see. He jumped off of the roof and took an abrupt turn into an ally-way on the left. I jumped across the street onto the opposite buildings and jumped down into the ally, kunai in hand and prepared.

"WHA?" I landed on top of him, -on his back, more precisely- and thankfully, he faceplanted into the ground. I pushed the kunai to the back of his neck.

"What the fuck do you think you were doing, you asshole? Try to steal from someone like me and you're gonna get castrated..." I trailed off, yanking my bag out of the person's hand. I hooked my arms through it and thanked Jashin that karma wasn't being a total shit-head to me.

"Kinda... har to do tha... whe I'm a gir..." Came the muffled voice. I took a handful of her hair, pulling it toward me, "You don't look much like a girl with that physique..."

"Are you nearly done?" She asked in a lucid voice.

"Not till you tell me what exactly it is of mine that you want so badly," I grumbled.

"It's policy, you idiot," she replied, "I'm following orders. Take everything I can from you that's possible."

"What the fuck for?" I yelled, "Who are you?"

"I'm Dorobo, but that shouldn't mean anything to you. You know damn well what this is happening for."

"Oh my god... I didn't ask you why just to waste my breath," I growled, bashing her face in the ground.

"Those goddamn documents! What do you think?" She roared, writhing about. I paused for a moment, tapping my lip. A little light bulb lit in my noggin. "Those documents from Oto...?"

"I told you that you knew!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP," I replied, frustrated, "I can't give you the documents anyways... my partner accidentally- well, more or less- dropped them in a lake."

"Why're you telling me this?"

"Because you tried to fucking rob me, you thief!"

"Eh. Not my fault. Would you get off already?"

"No. I have more questions-" she groaned unhappily- "What were the documents pertaining to?"

"I don't know exactly. Something about marriage."

"Marriage?" I mused.

"Did I stutter, bitch?" Dorobo hissed. My eye twitched, "Remember who's top dog here. You want me to disfigure your face?"

The aggravated blonde sighed, "Anyway, yes, it was about marriage. My master wants the princess to marry to someone from this continent, so there will be trade and travel rights between my country and here. There is good bounty on my people if we cross here, just as there is for anyone from here going to my homeland."

"So, if I turned you in to Konoha, I could get a good pay on you?" I asked deviously.

"Yes, you... wait, did you even hear anything else that I said?"

"Y-yeah! I'm just... short on money..." I scratched my head, "Well, can't your 'master' or who-the-hell-ever arrange a marriage already so my things can be untouched by retards like you?"

"If you'd gotten a chance to read the policy, you'd know that anyone other than that mansion owner reads or terminates the document have to undergo punishment. Marriage must be to someone with high stature in this country- it can't be to some bitch like you." I grinned evilly at her remark.

* * *

"Th-that's Dorobo!" A guard yelled.

"How did you get a hold of him?" Another questioned.

"I'M A GIRL!"

I nervously laughed, "Umm... the explanation sort of fell from the sky... but anyway, I can get bounty on her for turning her in, correct?"

"Right," the first guard said, "We'll take her to the imprisonment centers. Take this note to the Hokage and ask for Shizune." As he spoke, he scribbled a few words down, then handed the paper to me with a grateful expression. I nodded to him, then stuck my tongue out at Dorobo.

I skipped along the pathway, leading to the Hokage; one of the two village gate guards eventually passed by me with speed and Dorobo tied up in grasp. I smiled, feeling glad I wouldn't have to put up with her anymore. Upon entering the Hokage's residence, I shyly scooted toward the large desk to reveal a sleeping Hokage.

_"So, this is Lady Tsunade... DAMN, LOOK AT THOSE BOOBS!" I mused in shock. _Suddenly, the door flung open, and a black-haired girl not too much older than me, began interrogating and asking what I needed. Quietly, I handed her the paper. Scanning it, she sweetly smiled from the note to me.

"Just a moment," she said. The raven disappeared from the room, reappearing with a small square box, "Here's your reward. It's one thousand on a banknote." I felt my jaw drop, "R-really?" She nodded, tending to papers at the Lady's desk. "Thank you for your contribution to the village. It's much appreciated- err... what's your name?"

"Minami," I peeped, "Or Mina."

"Minami-san, thank you," the girl said, "If you're ever willing to help again, feel free to say so. I take it you're a shinobi?" I nodded, "Alright. I'll tell the Lady of your help here tonight!" I nodded happily and left soon after to the bank, exchanging the note for money. It felt so good to have a decent amount of it all in one spot. I knew why Kakuzu was so greedy. I sighed smugly and put it away, walking back to the base, but then, an idea struck me across the head so hard, it almost hurt.

* * *

Hope you liked it! I'd be grateful for feedback.

-Hint, hint- ;)


	18. Plans Commence

I have another chapter, surprisingly! I'm abso-tootly positive of where this story is going finally, so updates will be alot more frequent. Every Friday _at least_ to be precise! So be sure to check up every Friday or so. :3

Upon rereading some of my chapters, I noticed a bunch of tense changes/subject-verb disagreement... ignore those typos until I fix them. I'm currently working on it. -.-

Also, thanks for the alerts and favorites, guys! It makes me smile to see emails about this story in my inbox.

Enjoy, all!

_Ps: note there are suggestive themes in this chapter. Oh, and last night, I had a dream about Hidan. Literally. /obsessive_

* * *

Upon walking back to the base, I took liberty in reading my new book. It felt embarrassing to blatantly be reading about sex because I didn't know, basically, _how_ to do things right. But learning was a start, right? I looked at the chapters and was a bit relieved to see there was a chapter focusing on oral. "_Outstanding Oral and How to Blow Minds."_ I sneered at the pun in the title. Sighing, I scanned the page, reading the part that pertained to giving oral to males. It wasn't long before I'd flipped through the whole chapter, a new mindset and all. I stopped, slammed the book shut and smiled. I could just see it all happening in my head. Putting said item away, I turned the doorknob of the base, and to my surprise, it was unlocked. The door slid ajar, and I noticed through the darkness that the windows were busted in. Goddamnit.

"Hey! Who the fuck is there?" I knew that voice and followed it quickly.

"Mina-chan?" Hidan asked. I glanced around frantically, then to my feet; eyes widening, I saw Hidan. Or what was left of him. "Where the hell is your body? How in fuck's name did you get decapitated?" A medium-sized pool of blood circled around him, and he didn't need body language to look beyond pissed off.

"Well, there was a piece'a shit ambush, and these bitches ran in, cut my head off and ran out, of course. Just my damn luck. Then everyone else just poofed away with jutsu- THEY RAN AWAY AND DIDN'T HELP ME, MINA-CHAN! HOW FAIR IS THAT?" Hidan ranted. I gingerly picked him up and held him out in front of me to look at him sadly. I hugged him to me and swayed for a moment.

"Damn, Mina-chan, wait till I get my body back before you do that," Hidan growled sexily. I looked down and noticed him accidentally being smothered into my chest. I made a _eep!_ and threw his head down to cover my blush.

"What the hell? Mina-chan, you're supposed to go with it!" He yelled. I peeked at him through my fingers then carefully held him again, "A-anyways... where's your body...?" I glanced to the left, seeing Hidan's shirtless body leaned against the wall. "Well... I don't know how to sew, Hidan..."

"You might as well just forget about it till that bastard Kakuzu gets back," Hidan muttered uphappily. There was a sudden knock on the door, and I set Hidan down to open it. "I'm comin' in, young'n." My eyes widened, "N-no, Old Lady, you can't!"

"Hush up, girl, I know what I'm doing." She walked with her head high, eyes closed, needle and thread in hands behind her back. My face fell; just who was this woman?

"M-Mina-chan, who's this old hag?" Hidan called. She and I sat by his body, aligning his head in the right spot as she began stitching his neck together.

"I'm Lady Rei," the elderly woman said.

"That hurts!"

"Shut up, you big baby. Anyhow, I'm Suna's greatest sensory ninja. I have bad ties with my village; so I proudly reside in Konoha."

"But... do you know who we are?" I questioned, watching as she began adding more intricate stitches to her pattern.

"The Akatsuki, ne?" Upon seeing my expression, she cackled in amusement, "I can't overlook mental pleas for help from a fellow follower like yourself, girl." She pulled a pendant out of her robe, and Hidan's eyes immediately lit up. "J-Jashin-sama!"

"But I'm not a Jashinist..." I muttered. Lady Rei was obviously displeased, slapping me quickly in result. I held my face and Hidan began yelling incoherent curses before saying, "You're lucky I can't feel my body yet, you old bitch! I don't give a fuck who you are, you can't hi-"

"Respect your elders-" He grew silent "-it's not my fault she falsely wears the symbol of the Lord. Do you wear yours falsely as well?"

"No, I'm Jashin-sama's high priest! I gave her that necklace... hoping she'd convert..." Hidan trailed off lowly.

"Oh, it's a symbol of the beginning of conversion?" Her eyes opened for the first I'd seen to reveal purple irises like Hidan's own; she turned to me and slightly bowed. "I'm sorry, girly. You should have said something sooner, ne?"

"B-but I didn't know you'd hi-"

"Well, you're set. What are your names again?" Hidan rolled his neck and clenched and reopened his fists.

"I'm Minami, and this is Hidan," I said quietly. Her mouth formed in an "o" and she grinned at me slyly. "This is the boy, ne?"

"The boy what...?" Hidan asked unknowingly. I looked away, saying nothing. Lady Rei giggled giddily.

"Are you gonna fucking tell me what you're talking about or not, goddamnit?" Hidan yelled as the three of us stood.

"How did you know I needed help though, Lady Rei?" I questioned, ignoring Hidan.

"Didn't you hear me say that I'm a sensory ninja? You should listen a little better, ne?" She patted her hands together and gathered her thread and needle. "I can sense changes and hitches in others' chakra. Everyone's chakra is different, therefore, I could determine when you were distressed, especially since you don't live far from myself." Afterward, she bustled out the door, telling Hidan and I to visit sometime.

"Thank you, Lady Rei!"

"Yeah, thanks, Ba-chan!" I smiled at the name for grandma that Hidan used. It was nice to hear him not be a total bitch and actually respect someone within the first day of meeting them. I glanced at Hidan. "You look alot sexier with your body attached to your head."

"I like to think so, too," Hidan sighed, his ego puffing up.

* * *

In my room, I told Hidan about what had happened back in the village; he agreed that it was pretty weird. Kakuzu's speculations of assassins being from across the seas was even more credible this was being explained and as it was playing out. I was almost positive that said man's thought were right.

"So, I have an idea," I declared.

"And?"

"Well... you know how we were on that mission together and the head of the mansion was a real arrogant bastard?" Hidan nodded, "Well, before I killed him, he asked if I'd come to see about marrying his son."

"So, you want to see if his son will marry who-the-fuck-ever it is that needs to get married? That princess or whatever?"

"Exactly. That head man had great stature in Otogakure, and it's assumptionally been passed to the son."

"Brilliant, Mina-chan! That could work!" He yelled, "Hell yeah, let's get at 'em!" The man got up and began for his scythe. I sighed, "Hidan, no. We have to wait till everyone returns, clear it with Leader, then see about Kakuzu joining us there. I can't chance you having your head cut off again."

"H-hey! They just caught me off guard..." He grumbled, throwing himself back into the neon pink blow up chair by my bed. Hidan pouted like a little kid with his arms crossed, bottom lip popped out. He caught me looking, "What're you lookin' at?"

"The cute little bastard by me that's actually pouting," I giggled, pointing at him.

"Eh? Shut the fuck up, I'm not pouting," he responded, "Fuck you, treating me like a kid and shit... and what was Ba-chan talking about me being 'the boy'?" I blushed, cursing that he'd remembered to bring it up. "Oh... umm... nothing."

"It's about me, so I have a right to know!" He pleaded. I looked away, rubbing my neck, "Really, it's silly anyways." I stood up and walked to my closet, putting the contents of my backpack away. Hidan crawled onto my mattress and reached for my shirt, effectively pulling me backward into his lap. I didn't take mind to that though- I could only pay attention to the bag as it flew in the air over my head. I watched it hit the wall and almost cried from joy upon seeing that, miraculously, nothing spilled out. Especially that damned book.

"You gonna tell me or am I gonna have to force it out of ya?" Hidan asked, wrenching all attention onto him. He bent over me, and I rolled out of his grasp to sit on my knees in front of him.

"Damn, you're not very sexual, are you?" He asked while propping his chin on a hand, disappointed. My eyes widened a bit, more of out surprise than anger. I twirled a piece of hair shly and rummaged through my brain, trying to think of what to say. "Do you think I'm a virgin?"

"What kind of question is that?" Hidan asked, laughing, "You're no virgin, silly!"

"You make me sound like a slut! And for your information, I'm very much a virgin!" At the end of my mini rant, I realized what I'd said and slowly covered my mouth, which I was hoping would also cover my shame.

"So thaaaaaat's why you act so weird when it comes to the topic of sex..." He wriggled his eyes brows at me, "Man, I have a whole lot to show you, Mina-chan."

"Just because I'm a virgin doesn't mean I don't know what to do... now you're the one treating me like a kid..." I muttered under my breath. Hidan smirked and pushed me onto my back to hover over me, taking my wrists captive in one hand above my head. "You want me to treat you like a grown up, huh? You gotta learn to play like the grown ups do then." Hidan placed his lips onto mine roughly, and I complied a bit shyly, struggling to keep up with each motion he was making. I didn't understand the pattern he had going for him, and it was confusing me- open lips lightly, close lips and peck, peck again, open lips. My heart was racing almost as fast as my mind. He slipped his tongue to meet mine and tasted my mouth hungrily. His free hand ran over my stomach, then to my chest. I finally decided to pull my hands from Hidan's grasp to push him off onto his back, reversing our positioning. He looked a little confused for a moment, but when I sat atop his lap, he didn't seem to mind much and grinned lustfully.

_"First rule to making it memorable: be aggressive and compassionate all in one." I recalled the book's first sentence._ Slowly, I ran my hands across his abs then his chest and pushed his shoulders down to the bed. I leaned above him, waiting for him to kiss me and pulled back a bit when he went to comply. Hidan growled in the back of his throat and tried once more. I smiled and licked from the stitches in his neck to his left ear, nibbling on it a bit recklessly. The Jashinist sat up, taking me with him and hummed lowly while tugging at the ends of my shirt before pulling the fabric over my head. _"Second rule to making it memorable: DON'T be timid!" _I refrained from shying away from him, despite what my mind was screaming. I rubbed my chest, watching him chuck my shirt to the ground and look me up and down.

"Damn... Mina-chan, you have some big tits," Hidan said smugly and laughed at his vulgarity, grabbing my breast with no hesitation. I licked my lips and rubbed my hips down on his, "You like them, don't'cha?"

"Oh ho, what's this? Normally you'd hate that choice in words," he mused before attacking my skin with his mouth. Running my hands through his hair, I chuckled, "Only in public, Hidan." I pulled one of his hands to my face and licked his finger; his free hand slid to the small of my back and he stilled to watch what I would do. _"Rule three: little to no teeth."_ That was one I'd have to work on. Maybe working on a banana would be worth it. I stuck his pointer finger into my mouth, sucking on it while pulling it out again to repeat the action. Hidan grinned upon seeing me shyly bat my eyelashes at him, "Don't forget you owe me a toe-curling blowjob." A shiver ran up my spine as I played with his finger.

"You're re-"

And suddenly, the door was slammed open. Hidan and I jerked our heads to the door angrily as Suigetsu and Sasuke burst in. Suigetsu stared in horror, a thin stream of blood leaving his nose nevertheless.

"Get it together, Suigetsu. Mina-san, Hidan-san, report to the common room," he said and walked out, yanking the paralyzed Suigetsu with him. Hidan grabbed my chin and pulled me into a kiss once more, ignoring the request.

"_Now,_" Sasuke added sourly. Hidan and I deadpanned but complied once I replaced my shirt.

In the common room, everyone was gathered once more for what I guessed was to try to figure out what the hell happened. The two of us stood behind the couch and everyone else, because Leader had already started talking. Kakuzu turned to look at Hidan, "Who reattached your head?"

"Mina-chan's friend."

"I wouldn't trust the people around here." The older man trailed off, turning away. Hidan stomped and shook his fist in the air while saying, "That fucking reminds me- where the fuck did you guys go anyways? You all left me for dead you motherfuckers!" Leader stopped mid-sentence to stare at the immortal. "Hidan, shut up... anyhow, it's been determined that there were two intruders."

"What did they look like?" I questioned randomly.

"They wore alot of maroon. That's all I can confidently recall," he replied. I knew it! It had to be a couple of bastards from wherever Dorobo came from- which I was thinking was the Demon Country- because she wore maroon as well, if I was correct. A fire brewed inside me, and for once, I thought I would be able to get this whole situation under control. I explained what happened in Konoha once more to everyone in the room.

"Mina-san, I demand you to take residence in Konoha," Leader spoke, "Until I say something otherwise or further on this matter. If we retrieve the bijuu immediately and seal them, you'll no longer have to worry about your pursuers anyhow."

"Stay in Konoha... why? And for what? This place is basically the same as Konoha, isn't it?" I questioned unhappily, "Will I not have anymore missions?"

"You are still part of this organization. These are just safety precautions. You're mission to gain the tailed fox is still under way, and that mission should be mission enough." I stood tall and bowed, respecting his choice. "Understood."

"Sasuke, Karin, Juugo, and Suigetsu are underway to leave now, and Kisame has gone himself," Leader said, turning to the window of the room that was clearly broken. "Soon, it'll be over." Hidan hopped over the couch to sit by his partner, who he gave a big, toothy smile to. Kakuzu simply squinted his eyes and knocked him up side the head.

"That hurt, you old bastard!" Hidan growled. I sighed, thinking of how much money I'd have to spend to stay in Konoha. Good thing I had that banknote... I leaned onto the couch, sticking my head between the two men to look at Kakuzu. "Do you know where I'd go to find a place to stay in Konoha, Kakuzu-sama?" The masked man shot me a glare. "If this is about money, then no."

"N-no, it's not! I have money!" I sighed and rubbed my forehead, "I just needed help..."

"Couldn't we just ask Ba-chan if she has room for us?" Hidan muttered.

"...'Us'?" Kakuzu asked. I was just as befuddled. "Yeah, 'us'?"

"Well, yeah. I'm not gonna let you go off alone to get gang-banged by a couple'a fuckers," Hidan replied, "What's this have to do with you anyway, Kakuzu?" Said man stared passed me to Hidan for a moment, then looked away. "Nothing. Just making sure that you won't be around to keep me back from bounty hunting." Hidan deadpanned, yelling at his partner, who reacted with a stale expression; I could see it in Kakuzu's eyes that he wasn't too partial about Hidan staying in Konoha with me- whether he actually cared for Hidan's well-being or was able to accomplish more with him around.

"You'll miss us being here, won't you, Kakuzu-sama?" I asked smugly. Kakuzu gave a half-ass glance, "Why would I?" Hidan laughed soundly then winked at me. "Kakuzu-chan, we'll miss you and be sure to visit to just see you!"

"Of course, Kakuzu-sama!" I added, "All you had to do was ask!"

"You've been around Hidan for far too long, Mina-san. He's starting to rub off onto you." I laughed sheepishly and stood to walk out of the room. Hidan caught sight and hopped up after me, slinging an arm around my waist. "Hidan, come to bed with me."

"To fuck?"

"If you want me to fall asleep while doing so, then yes," I chuckled. Hidan did the same, "No, no, I'd have you up all night for sure, whether you think so or not. We can't have you without sleep though, so I guess we'll have to save it, hm?"

* * *

It felt very... odd to wake up in Hidan's grasp. My back was pulled into his chest and I giggled at his quiet occasional snoring. It was sort of cute. I'd have to pick on him about it later. Scooting off the mattress, I staggered over to my closet and changed into the gorgeous, green dress Hidan had gotten me for my birthday, and when I tossed my hair up into a bun and turned around, I found him snuggled up with a pillow, half awake. He slightly smiled and I realized how adorable he looked when his hair was carelessly messed up.

Soon after, he and I had left the base with Ran following after, rushing to get to her job on time.

"Say, Ran-chan, where do you work anyways?" I questioned out of the blue. She turned her little head to me as she kicked her paws quickly to jump up onto my shoulder. "Takaramono. It's the local jewelry store around here. The staff said that I would make a great saleswoman, considering my bubbly and cute personality! Especially toward all the young guys..." Stars sparkled in her eyes as she daydreamed. Hidan snorted, "Like any of 'em will be interested in you anyway. Only someone out of their right mind would so much as approach your crazy ass."

"Fuck you-" the small cat arched its back, "-you're lucky Mina-chan barely puts up with you! She'll probably kick you to the curb soon anyway!" Hidan made a "pfft" and grabbed my waist, "I'm too cute for Mina-chan to dump." I raised a brow at him but refrained from saying anything.

"See? She knows it's true!" He mused as I rolled my eyes.

"Eh, whatever, Hidan. Why're you so laid back this morning anyways? Shouldn't you be stressing about getting to work yourself?" She asked.

"Oh, he has a job?" I muttered, shocked.

"Yeah! He didn't tell you? He works at some faggot-ass bakery," Ran replied. I immediately thought of Naruto; it had to be the one he'd earlier mentioned.

"It's not my fault that's the only place that would hire me... as long as I'm making money, I don't care much," Hidan grumbled, "Besides, I don't even have to work for that long. Just from ten till five." The kitten groaned upon the subject, "I have from nine in the morning till eight at night... so unfair!" Soon, the village gates popped into view and Ran changed form into Himeko while Hidan transformed into his disguise used in Konoha.

"Well, you two, I'll be going," Himeko said, waving, "Be good kiddies. Mina-chan, don't get pregnant while I'm away." She giggled and disappeared to the West part of town. I sighed, shaking my head. As Hidan and I walked quietly, I intentionally bumped his hand with mine, hoping he'd get the hint.

Nothing. I mentally facepalmed, then tried again.

Nothing.

"Can't you take a hint?" I yelled at him. The two gate guards stared from a distance with funny expressions. I glanced at them and yelled a greeting to them, then spun to Hidan.

"What the hell's up your ass? I don't even know what you're talking about!" Hidan yelled back unhappily.

"You won't hold my hand..." I trailed. The Jashinist huffed loudly, grabbing my hand.

"This appeases me," I said with a small smile.

"Oh, I can appease you alright..." Hidan whispered, licking his lips, "Especially when we get our own place." My cheeks reddened and I adjusted my grip on his hand. One of our hands was sweating, but I wasn't about to point it out to ask. A small fuzzy feeling arose in my nether-regions as I considered his words, which led to recalling the infamous wet dreams I previously had about this very person beside me. I smirked and looked him in the eye, "I'm holding you to that, Hidan." He shrugged, "Fuck, I don't mind that at all." Normally, that big, fat ego of his would be a huge turn off, but I suppose I wanted it to be true, so I couldn't bring myself to object.

"Save it for the bedroom, kids." Hidan and I stopped in our tracks and turned around quickly to find Lady Rei- eyes squinted, hands behind her back, posture slightly bent.

"L-Lady Rei!" I sputtered, "Umm... good morning!"

"Ba-chan, you don't hav'ta eavesdrop just because your golden days are over," Hidan said rudely. I punched him in the cheek and crossed my arms, apologizing to the woman. She giggled and waved her hand as if shooing a fly away. "It's fine. Had you not busted 'em in the chops, I would've chased him yonder and back to do so myself."

"Well, Lady Rei, it's good to see you again. We were just on our way to the bookstore."

"Well, glad to say, I don't work on Mondays, girly. What was it that you needed though?" She asked, smiling.

"We need a place to stay," Hidan said in a matter-of-fact tone, holding his pointer finger at her.

"Hidan, if you keep this up, you won't have a jaw by the end of the day," I clenched my fists.

"What'd I even say that was so bad?"

"I don't mind it, young'n; this lug's alot like me, believe it or not," she replied, "But about your housing problem, I'd look into an apartment. I won't stand for you two twitterpatin' constantly or keeping me up at night."

"That's fi-"

"To the apartments, Mina-chan..." Hidan cut in, pushing me along. I blushed in embarrassment, "I'll get back to you about it, Lady Rei!" The elderly woman shook her head with a chuckle.

It wasn't long before Hidan and I had found ourselves a place to stay. There were two beds, and I was sure he and I would only use one; I guess that meant Himeko would be able to stay when she needed to. The best thing about the place was that they weren't expensive at all- granted, our home was small, of course. Hidan left for the bakery a bit after, and I figured I'd see Teuchi about possibly working at Ichiraku's. Maybe this time he wouldn't scoot me off. I locked the door behind me and put the key in the kunai holster bandaged onto my thigh. Our home wasn't too bad, it being an apartment complex and all.

* * *

Review/favorite/alert, guys~

The support is much, much loved. Hope you liked it! :)

Updates soon!


	19. Bite the Rock

Thanks so, so much to those I've received support from. I'm glad people still read this story. I like it, personally... ^^ I received a few alerts and favorites alongside two reviews, so to thank them:

_tigergurl5307_, I'm not going to stop writing until I have this finished. Even then, I'll probably still want to update, heheh. I'm expecting those cookies, by the way! ;)  
_VortexEssence7_, you don't know how much you picked my spirits up. That honestly means alot. I hope you keep reading!  
Much love to you guys!

Anyhow, onto this chapter. There's a miniature 'timeskip', if you can call it that. Just a few months though. Just wanted to be sure you all noticed.  
_P.s.: there IS a sexual situation toward the end of this chapter. It's pretty detailed. I've warned you!_

Expect updates. I have nothing better to do~

Enjoy!

* * *

Days passed, which in turn developed into weeks and then months. The temperature continued to drop with each passing day. Hidan and I finally had some sort of routine- woke up near nine, took showers and cleaned up, he went off to work, I ran around the village and helped Lady Rei when she needed it, then we headed home, and fell asleep. The bond I held toward Hidan was beginning to change into something more than a physical bond, and I thought that was reciprocated, if I knew him well enough to say so. We hadn't had sex or done anything sexual unbelievably, as much as we both wanted to. There was just always something in the way- whether it had been Himeko coming to stay with us for the night, Hidan was dead tired, one of us felt horribly, or Lady Rei insisted on having us visit. Whatever it was, we discussed and agreed that we believed fate said it wasn't time, as cheesy and silly as that sounded. Hidan said it was Jashin, and somehow throughout it all, I believed that Hidan had talk about him enough to make me honestly believe in the said god. That may've explained why my pendant had been reacting oddly at times of need or when I was extremely happy; it was never anything crazy or too insane, but it was always enough to remind me that, that thing named "faith" did actually exist out there, even if I didn't want to accept it.

Mid-December came to roll around, and not much had changed. There were no encounters with Dorobo's allies, there weren't many missions as far as I knew, and I hadn't lately heard from Leader or much of anyone from the Akatsuki. I felt a bit disconnected from my family, and I couldn't have helped but feel that this was happening on purpose. Maybe Leader kicked me out so there would be less chance of the hideout being destroyed- I didn't know. What I did know though, was that I missed how things were, despite how happy I was living with Hidan. Something just felt amiss.

Naruto and I grew closer over time, and he was glad that I actually lived in Konoha. I didn't think Naruto took much liking to "Hideki," but Hideki probably felt the same toward Naruto. Hidan _was_ still Hidan after all, and that was something I was surprisingly grateful for.

Naruto had his arm draped across my shoulders as we both scanned the menu overhead. He hummed thoughtfully, "Wha'd'ya say about having a hot chocolate and a cookie? Sounds good, right?" His stomach nearly sang in agreement as Naruto drooled. I laughed, "That's fine with me." Naruto walked up to Hidan and opened his mouth to order; Hidan cracked a smile and cut in. "The usual, kid?" The blonde squinted, nodding happily. Hidan put in the order and returned to the register where he lazily propped his head on his hand, eyes half-lidded. I did the same across from him on the desk. "Business slow today?"

"Extremely. I think we're only in business because you two come here every Tuesday," Hidan muttered.

"Well, I'm sure we won't mind to keep coming here, Hideki-kun!" Naruto beamed, "We can bring more business in eventually. Especially if we end up suckering Gai and Bushy Brows into coming with us."

"You know they'll end up doubling their routine laps around the village if they so much as taste a grain of sugar," I said, sighing.

"Eh, I don't mind as long as they don't make me run with them," Naruto replied. Not long ago, said boy had finally gotten around to introducing me to all of his friends in town. It was nice to know so many people, because if they ever came across me, they'd actually say hello. Oh, and Hana eventually gave me an official apology for being so picky about her house; she said she would rehire me, but they didn't need a housekeeper anymore. Hidan summed it up to being fault of my bad luck.

"Hideki, we could see if Shizune-ne-chan would let us set up a small stand for the bakery somewhere in the Hokage building," I suggested, "You and I both know I don't have anything better to do anyway." Hidan grabbed our order from a back counter and handed it to us, "It's whatever you wanna do, Mina-chan. I'd much rather have you work here than across town. Work just depresses the fucking shit outta me!"

"That's why you're always upset when you get home, hm?" I asked quietly. He acted sane whenever he was sad, and that fact in itself was sad. "Come sit with us till a customer comes in." He shrugged, hopped over the register and followed. Naruto and I 'Itadakimasu'd happily and blowed on the hot chocolate gingerly.

"Any new missions coming up, Naruto-kun?" I asked. Hidan slithered his hand onto my thigh under the table, and I silently cursed him- he knew that would make me nervous!

"No, not really... Tsunade said there was an escorting mission for someone from Kumo to here. I guess I'll go on that one with Sai and Sakura soon; there hasn't been much else to do around here anyway."

"Heard anything on Sasuke?" I questioned. As odd as it felt to admit, I was a bit worried about said male and his group. Leader hadn't reported on him or Kisame for that matter. I was just hoping the bijuu weren't too much to handle. Naruto visibly stiffened in his seat, "No... none at all. There's been rumor that Itachi passed not long ago, but no one knows if it was Sasuke that... killed him..." My eyes widened. Itachi? Beat- no, murdered- by Sasuke? That couldn't be right! And if it were true, surely Leader would've mentioned something!

"Oh... that... well, I guess that's good. If it's true, he finally got what he's wanted," I said sadly. Granted, I wasn't close to Itachi whatsoever, but I still considered him part of my artificial family. Naruto stared at his cookie indifferently. "I just wish that, y'know, he'd come back already. I've done everything I can to accomplish that, and I'm not done trying, but damnit, won't he give up sometime?" He slammed his fist down on the table; the few people surrounding stared.

"It's just stupid. A friend is a friend. I don't care what they've done or how long they've been away... I'll do anything to keep them around," he whispered. My heart dropped in a moment, and Hidan could tell what was on my mind. He pulled his hand away to steal a piece of my cookie for himself. Suddenly, a ding sounded as the bakery's door were forced open. Sakura had a furious air about her, "Naruto... WERE YOU JUST GOING TO SKIP TRAINING TODAY?" Naruto looked to her, eyes squinted, "There was... training today...?"

"Yes, you idiot!" With that, Sakura marched over and yanked the poor boy out of the building by the ear. Hidan and I stared after him, then shook our heads.

"What'cha gonna do today, Mina-chan?" The Jashinist asked curiously. I smiled at him and tapped his nose, "I don't know, maybe to Lady Rei's. I haven't checked up on her in a few days. We should do something special tonight, Hidan." He chuckled, "That'd be nice. As long as it's far, far away from this gay-ass bakery. Where do you wanna go?"

"Wherever you'll take me," I replied happily.

"I don't really know what's around here..." Hidan trailed. I slipped my hand onto his thigh, copying his earlier actions, "I'll plan it out then. Be at home as soon as you can, alright?" Hidan's cheeks slightly reddened, "I sense a great night. A great_ fucking_ night." He winked at me, and I grinned, kissing him slowly. I stood, grabbing Naruto's leftovers. "You can have what's left of mine, Hidan."

"Don't miss me too much now, Mina-chan," he called as I walked off, "I could say the same to you, you little fucker." Walking out of the bakery, through the village gates, into the forest, I made a decision I'd possibly regret. I fingered through my key ring and unlocked the door in front of me. It smelled like home, and looked like it, too. I burst into Leader's "central office" quickly. "Leader-sama!" Said male looked up at me from his paperwork silently. "Long time, no see, Mina-san."

"Long time, no see, my ass! Why haven't you so much as even updated me on how things are?" I demanded. Just then, Konan stepped in from a side door that led to her and Leader's personal room. "Mina-chan! Fancy seeing you here!" I gave her a quick, forced smile, waiting for the male to reply. "Nothing has changed, Mina-san."

"So Itachi is still alive then, right? Sasuke has had no contact with him?"

"Of course not. Itachi is alive and well, joining Kisame on his mission. Sasuke and company returned a few days ago with their assigned bijuu," Leader replied, stoic.

"Oh... why is there a rumor circulating then?" I questioned.

"Because Sasuke simply killed a clone," Leader explained, "A powered clone with thirty percent of his actual ability. He's been led to believe that Itachi is dead."

"What... does that mean for Itachi? Does he have to go into hiding?" I whispered, worried for him.

"Until the bijuu are collected, yes," he replied. A sense of relief washed over me. As long as he was alright, that's what really mattered.

"How are you and Hidan, Mina-chan?" Konan asked as she sat on the edge of the desk in the room. I blushed, looking to the side. "Well... we're good. He's still his wanna-be-badass, cussing-too-much, and overly-religious self. Not much has changed, besides him having a job. I think he's missed being out and about with Kakuzu, off killing people though."

"Are you two going steady yet?" She prodded. The blush I had deepened. What did that mean exactly? Was she asking if we were engaged? Or...? Konan giggled and glanced at Leader. "Only kidding. That's such a personal question."

"Well, actually... you two go on dates occasionally, I'm sure. Do you know of a good place to go on one around here?" I asked randomly. Leader looked down in some amount of embarrassment, and Konan ruffled his hair, "Well, there's a good place to go at night. It's a huge field with flowers everywhere, there's a waterfall a few yards away from the field, and it's decently far away from any lights, so the stars can be seen really well. I don't know how much Hidan would like it, but you could suggest it to him. Oh, and there's a great restaurant on the far east side of the village."

"I'm supposed to pick where we go on our 'date' for tonight, so hopefully that'll be okay along with whatever else I figure out to do," I said quietly, "Well, I guess I'll be going. Thank you, you two." I bowed lightly and they watched me walk out of the door.

* * *

"May I help you, ma'am?" The nicely dressed male asked me. I held my chin thoughtfully, "Could I see one of your menus possibly?" He handed me one and I looked over it quickly. I wanted Hidan and I to eat out at least, so neither of us would be hungry; wherever we went, the restaurant had to have Hidan's favorite- spare ribs. He wouldn't even have to see the rest of the menu, knowing ribs were available. I checked the price. Probably shouldn't have.

_"KA? THIRTY BUCKS FOR SOME RIBS? THAT'S FUCKING RIDICULOUS!" I yelled to myself. _I sighed; good quality wasn't for cheap, so it'd have to do, especially since they had my favorite food as well. I thanked the host and placed a reservation, hoping Hidan would be home immediately after work. Walking along the pathway, I decided to buy a dress for tonight; Konoha had some great sense of style. I settled for a short pink cocktail dress and a pair of sparkly high heels; I was hoping it wouldn't have been too ridiculously cold at night.

When time passed too quickly for my liking, I started getting ready- dressing up and grabbing the things needed. I laughed at the fact that I had to bring my backpack on a date too. When Hidan walked in, my heart jumped and I couldn't think straight. It was sad how tired he looked, even though I knew he didn't ever do anything that took any amount of energy.

"Someone's seriously all dressed up," he mused. I grinned, "And in a few minutes, you will be too, mister!" His face fell, "What?" I frowned, forgetting the fact he wouldn't want to dress fancy.

"I figured out where we should go," he claimed, "We can go somewhere... _fancy_ another night." I growled at him and dressed down. I took all of that time trying to figure out where to go, made reservations and everything! Heartless son of a bitch..

"But... I had everything all planned out... that's not fair, you fuck head!" I said unhappily, shoving his arm. Hidan just looked at me, "I would say sorry right about now if I actually was, but I'm not. Really, Mina-chan. You'll like where I want to take you." I rolled my eyes and we left.

* * *

So far all we had done was walk. Walk, walk, walk. Then run, run, run. I was beginning to lose hope that Hidan actually knew where he was going. The sun had set a while ago, and the night animals were at play. I huffed to myself, "Hey, Hidan? Are we-"

"Here!" He yelled, "Finally! My feet fucking hurt like shit." The Jashinist actually ran forward and stopped to fall onto his back. Ahead of me was a large field of flowers. I could've swore it was the place that Konan mentioned. The sky was lit beautifully, moonlight shining down on us. I walked over to Hidan and sat by him, the two of us looking upward. I smiled small, "It's gorgeous out here."

"I thought you'd like it," he said, "Being the sap for nature that you are."

"Always have been," I admitted.

"This isn't the best part though," he said, hopping up to his feet and dragging me along by the wrist. He rushed me through the flowers, leaving a trail through them as we sprinted on. Soon a river came to view, and we continued parallel to it until the ground came to a stop, and it seemed as if we could fall off of the face of the earth. The bluff we stood upon towered over everything in sight; the rolling hills were covered with blankets of trees. The whispering of the river seemed to break off for a moment, then roared to life as the water fell in the form of a small waterfall running down from where we were. I admired Hidan as he looked to the scene ahead of us, and when he turned to look at me, he gave me his usual smug smirk. "Wanna go swimming?" My expression contorted, "S-Swimming? I know you can't get sick because you're immortal, but I'll catch the century's worst cold!"

"You'll be fine though, Mina-chan! Come on, I know you've always wanted to do this!" Hidan reasoned while yanking his clothes off, down to his boxers. I blushed and looked away with my arms limp at my sides. He grinned, "I'll even help you undress." He began tugging at the shirt and pants I wore until I remained simply in my bra and underwear; I moved accordingly to his actions. Before I knew it, he'd pulled me into his arms and jumped off the side of the bluff. It felt like that night all over again- the night that I lost all of those documents- like we'd just fallen off of my summoning, and we cursed at each other, shoving the blame away. The air was different though. Hidan let out a loud "yahoo!" while I was practically glued to his side, my arms and legs secure around him, trying not to tear up upon seeing how far we would have to fall to come even close to the connecting river.

Air whipped through my hair, and I reached out into the space carefully, one leg following, then the other. I felt like I could fly; not just because I was falling some amount of feet to a riverbed, but more because... I felt alive. The pendant around my neck almost stung my chest, and I held it in one hand, smiling. Hitting the surface, water washed over Hidan and I. It was cold and as soon as I breathed for air, a chill racked through my system. I would definitely be catching a cold after this. I tried to find a shallower area, barely being able to tiptoe through the muddy muck below. Hidan grabbed my hand and pulled me forward to him, "I have no clue how we'll be able to get back to our clothes, Mina-chan..."

"Maybe Jashin wanted it to be than way, hm?" I smiled, placing my arms around his neck. He sighed, "Yeah, well, the one time we don't have our clothes, we can't fuck. I never win." I rolled my eyes and let him go to splash him with water.

"What was that for, you little witch?"

"What're you talking about? This?" I splashed him again, watching him cough and pout.

"Yes that!" I laughed at his frustration and swam away, and just when I thought I'd left him in the dust, he grabbed my foot and held me to him by the waist. "Mina-chan... I- well..."

"What's with the sudden change in heart, Hidan-_chan_?" I mocked in a sweet tone. He avoided eye contact for a moment, "Well... this will probably sound so fucking stupid to you that you'll probably want to laugh at me, but... I think that Jashin-sama likes you. Y'know, how you asked about it a while back and all."

"Well, I would hope so, Hidan," I said quietly.

"And since Jashin-sama likes y-" Hidan stopped to look down at my chest, and my face fell as I slapped him, "I don't mind you looking, but at least finish your sentence first, bastard..."

"N-no, Mina-chan!" Hidan gingerly grabbed the pendant of my necklace; the small metal beads seemed so cold against my neck, I could have mistaken them for nearly moving by their own accord. He eyed it eagerly, "Does this happen often?" I looked to his hands where the pendant almost unnoticeably glowed a soft purple. It wasn't new to me; I stared at it normally, "Not exactly often... whenever I'm really happy or feel scared, it glows and stings my skin like this. Does it mean something?"

"You really believe in Jashin-sama, don't you?" He asked with a grin. I pursed my lips, "It's not that I don't believe in him. I just don't like the mass-murder-people-for-him thing. It's hard to be a Jashinist under those circumstances... so I guess it's nothing to really discuss." Hidan brushed hair out of my face, "I think you'll warm up to the thought-" He planted a small kiss on my lips, "-we could have some hella good sex if you ever converted, you keep that in mind..." I laughed and bit his shoulder, knowing it'd get him going.

_Snap._

I wrenched my field of vision to the right where the noise came from; I remained tense, as Hidan tried peeking over the shoreline. Hidan suddenly jerked forward, muttering beneath his breath, "That's one of the assassin fuckers!" My eyes widened. "They can't see me, Hidan. Wha-"

"Stay here. Hide somehow. I'm gonna take the bitch out."

"But you don't even have your scythe!"

"My hands are good enough." The Jashinist pushed himself out of the river bed, soundly sloshing over to the assassin. He let out a loud cackle, "Oh, you're already hurt, huh? Good thing; it'll make this alot easier for me!" Hidan grabbed Kaito by his shirt collar and slammed him down onto the ground. Grabbing his pendant and holding it to his mouth, Hidan said a silent prayer with eyes closed.

"Please... don't..." The withering male whispered and coughed as blood dribbled down his chin.

"No can do, faggot. You hurt Mina-chan, remember? Can't have little bitches like you running around," Hidan taunted, "That, and Jashin-sama must be dying for a sacrifice by now!" The immortal laughed like a maniac as he took one of the fallen ninja's kunai to slice his hand and marked Jashin's symbol into the ground with his blood; he leaned down to Kaito and sliced part of his cheek. In response, Hidan licked the weapon to lap the blood up as his skin darkened to form his ritualistic skeletal skin pattern. "I have something special for you, motherfucker." Hidan dragged a large rock into the ritual circle nearby his victim's head. "Bite it." Kaito turned his head away, and Hidan kicked him in the side. "I said fucking bite it, you piece of shit! Do you want me to beat your face in instead?" Kaito winced, holding himself as he slowly rolled onto his stomach, biting the large rock. His jaw was spread wide, and hurt wails fell from his throat. Hidan took a deep breath, declaring, "For you, Jashin-sama," then lifted a leg and stomped down on Kaito's head, producing a sickening cracking, ringing all around the two screams from the males.

"Ahh, shit!" Hidan yelled and grasped his chin, "That's good..." I peeped my head out of the water trying to hide the fact that I was a bit scared, "Is he still alive?" Hidan fixed his jaw into the correct positioning with a small grunt of pain. "Barely. How should we end it? Slice his st-

"Nothing I'll have to stitch up," I cut in. His smile fell a bit as he pondered, "Well, as long as you don't mind a mess!" I grumbled and pulled myself onto the ground to approach him as he jabbed the kunai into his throat. Hidan's skin faded to its normal pale tone, and he stared to the sky in ecstasy. I chuckled and pulled down on the kunai to get him to look at me. "Let's go home, Hidan."

* * *

I had to say, the apartment was much more comfortable than a cold river. I hung our damp clothes on the shower rack, and walked into the bedroom to find Hidan sprawled across the bed tiredly in a new pair of clean, crisp boxers. "You want that bed for yourself tonight?"

"No, come here."

"Really, if you need more room, ju-"

"Mina-chan. Come here," Hidan commanded. I shyly walked over to lay by him, and he pulled me close to hold me in a sort of embrace. I blushed a bit and hugged him back; I titled my head upward a bit and licked his neck before sucking on it slightly.

"Is the door locked?" Hidan breathed out, hands scurrying down my back to my butt and the ends of my shirt.

"It is," I replied, "This... Hidan... I-"

_Knock, knock, knock. _I shut my eyes slowly in annoyance. OF ALL NIGHTS? WHO THE HELL WANTED IN ANYWAYS? Hidan cursed under his breath while I opened the door. Himeko walked in happily and, upon noticing our glares, said, "What's up with you guys? Did you forget I was staying tonight?" I facepalmed, just now remembering that fact.

"We were about to get to fucking, you prissy-ass princess!" Hidan yelled and rolled onto his stomach limply. Himeko pursed her lips, "You guys still haven't gotten to have you?"

"NO," the immortal and I said dramatically. She giggled at us before apologizing and heading to take a shower. I cuddled up to Hidan after feeling chill bumps raise on my skin, "Sooner or later, Hidan."

"Preferably sooner. Like, now," he said disgruntled. I smiled and sat up, looking at him. I finally had the confidence to, so I might as well have taken advantage of the fact that Himeko took fifteen-minute showers. Hidan nearly glared at me, wanting to know what I was thinking.

"You want me to suck your dick, Hidan?" I taunted. The males eyes widened a bit and he gave a long grin, "Get to it, bitch." I didn't much like that derogatory name in general, but it... actually kind of turned me on... I kissed him on the lips and licked his chin before biting it, moving down to plant sloppy kisses along his breastbone, to his abdomen- lower and lower. I rubbed his groin, helping to harden it. Upon reaching the material of his boxers with my lips, I smiled and raked my teeth lightly against the nearby skin, bring the fabric downward with my mouth. This was it; this was what I'd been freaking out over for over a month. I practiced on bananas when Hidan wasn't around, but what if that wasn't enough to prepare me? Oh, Jashin... In a moment, a partially erect appendage popped up. My nether-parts went numb as I licked my lips and smiled at an anxious Hidan. I took his manhood into my grasp and licked from the base to the tip, swirling my tongue around the head. Slipping it into my mouth, I tucked my lips over my teeth and sucked while slowly massaging his testicles in my free hand. I must have been doing something right; Hidan let out a throaty groan that had my heart beating out of my chest. Bobbing my head for a good moment, I pulled back to admire the Jashinist. "My, my..." I muttered, stroking him, hands wrapped around his length, "Someone's really hard, huh?" I blushed, realizing how large he was; I didn't know if it was average size- it seemed like a perfect size to me though. Hidan grunted and threw his head back, "M-Mina-chan... shit, you're good at this..." He winked, making me giggle, "You look sexy, Hidan." Leaning down once more, I rubbed the head of his appendage on my lips as if it were lipstick and forced it into my mouth, leading it as far as I could. I wrenched my eyes shut and the small patch of hair at the hilt of him tickled my nose.

"O-oh, Jashin! Fuck!" The immortal's hands tangled into my hair as I continued to play with his balls. I pulled up, precum and drool stringing from my mouth. I wiped it from my mouth to coat his cock with it, rubbing it between my palms up and down.

"Damnit, you're gonna... make me cum this fast?" He mused. I raised my eyebrows, "Oh, you're close? You better cum hard for me then..." Hidan chuckled and forced my head down onto him; I hummed against his heated flesh, letting it slide to the back of my throat over and over. Those small moans that escaped Hidan grew a little louder, making my panties wet. Hidan slipped his hand to my ass and he slapped it; that was a habit of his, oddly. I moaned at the sting and sucked harder.

"Shit, I'm gonna..." he struggled out. As he spoke, Hidan released his seed into my mouth. I sat up, covering my lips. I opened my mouth to show him his cum, "See it?" The male watched dazedly as I swallowed and opened my mouth again. I grabbed his appendage once more, giving a last few strokes; the Jashinist gave a long, shaky sigh, "Damn, you top it off by swallowing, too... you like kinky shit, don't you, Mina-chan?" I blushed deeply, "I told you I knew what to do!" Suddenly, the bathroom door was opened; I jumped and yanked the blankets over Hidan and I as he pulled his boxers up. We laughed quietly when she walked in.

* * *

I woke up to a huge banging noise in the middle of the night. I was so sleepy, I couldn't tell what was going on, but when I heard Himeko scream my name, I came to my senses and grabbed the kunai beneath my bed. It was dark; and there was silence.

"Minami-chan!" Came the high-pitched, blood-curdling scream. I shakily scanned the room- Hidan was gone. The bed was soaked. Ran wasn't in bed. The lights were out. Footsteps sounded down the hall, and I quietly jumped up to peep out of the doorway. Another scream came to life, but halfway through, it just cut out. My stomach knotted as I ran down the hall to the bathroom- the only lighted room of the apartment. The sight... had me in despair. Hidan's head was dropped in the toilet, jaw pried open, arms and legs shoved into the trash can, his torso left in bloodied water in the bathtub. Red was smeared across the walls; a single dark figure finger-painted illegible words with the liquid. I silently stepped behind them and grabbed them by the neck. It had to be a girl, considering the long hair in my face. I took the kunai to her throat. "Who the fuck are you?" I demanded.

"Kazue," the soft voice chimed. I plainly looked at her, "Fucking bitch." Holding her chin, I slit her throat, then threw her body into the tub to bleed out. Hidan tried sounding my name; but he couldn't form words, due to his jaw being popped out of joints. I fell to my knees to pull his head out of the toilet. I shoved his jaw closed, hearing him yell in pain. I let him lay in my lap as tears collected in my eyes.

"Mina-chan..." Hidan trailed. I touched his cheek lightly, "First they cut your head off... then they rip you into pieces... I guess they figured out that all I really care for is my family, and they want to take that. What next- are they going to tear your heart from your chest and run with it? Wait... where is Ran? Is she okay; did she run off?" Hidan grimaced at my words, then closed his eyes at the mention of Ran. My heart fell through the floor as more tears built up- enough that I couldn't prevent from sobbing. I could barely see through my tears, and I wiped them away frantically. Finally, upon looking to the floor beside the sink, I found a small stuffed kitten ripped in half. Stuffing was sprawled all about, small sparkling rocks in the mix. I carefully picked her pieces up and stared at them while I cried and cried. I knew what I had to do; and I was sure the Demon Country eagerly awaited me.


	20. Date Gone Wrong

Woo, another chapter. This one is a little boring... aside, thanks for favorites, alerts, and for the review.

_animefreak653, _I know, I was sad while writing that part! Never fear though. ;) Oh, and of course Hidan is sexy, hehe!

Enjoy!

* * *

"Now, now, child, it's nothin' to cry o'er," Lady Rei said softly, "It can be fixed. Jashin-sama be praised you weren't touched, ne?" I hugged my knees to my chest as I watched the elderly woman stitch Hidan's arms to his torso. I'd earlier propped his head up with a pillow so he could look around.

"It think she left me alive for a reason," I muttered, "Hidan killed her brother... and I think she wanted me to feel the same sort of pain." Hidan sighed and apologized; I ran my a hand through his hair, lightly scratching his scalp. I was glad Lady Rei had showed up; It was nearly five in the morning, but she was kind enough to come see us after I found the horrid sight in our bathroom. The whole apartment was soaked in blood; and I didn't know how I'd get it all out.

"At least she killed those other assassin shitheads before this mess," Hidan added. I scoffed, "Yeah, then proceeded to stuff them in my closet. She must've been one crazy-ass bitch..."

"Mina-chan, just shut up about that. It's over. At least you don't have them on your dick now," Hidan said rudely. I kept watching Lady Rei, playing with Hidan's hair; and when she was ready to put his head back on, I helped steady it onto his neck in the right spot.

"I'm so used to this, it doesn't even hurt anymore," Hidan said, yawning. I smiled lightly at him and he popped his neck once she finished, "Thanks alot, Ba-chan." Lady Rei shook her head, gathering her needles and thick thread.

"Lady Rei... I have to ask something," I said while helping Hidan to his feet. She raised her brows, never opening her eyes, "You need help, ne?" I nodded and felt Hidan's befuddled gaze on me.

"I'm going to the Demon Country to talk to their ruler, and I need you to join."

"Why haven't you told me about this? You're going to ask Ba-chan to go with you before you ask me?" Hidan yelled angrily, "I figured you'd want me around to help!"

"I'm asking Ba-chan to come because I already knew you'd come with me. I can't fix you up myself, so... I was asking her," I replied, "As for not mentioning it before, I just decided on it."

"What happens if journeying there doesn't change anything, girly? What do you hope to accomplish?" Lady Rei asked expectantly. I looked her straight in the eye, "I hope to stop this. I want to stop this bullshit from happening to Hidan and my... family. I'll do whatever the ruler asks, as long as the Demon Country leaves the people I love alone."

"What? What if they want to kill you?" Hidan yelled once more. I inhaled deeply, "Then so be it."

"Why would you want to die over something so stupid?" Hidan prodded, "No,- better yet- why would you be okay with _dying_ at all?"

"Because if I ended up being murdered over all of this, then, well... I've passed for people that I consider my family and for someone that I know would die for me a couple of times if he had to. We shouldn't be talking like this though," I replied with a sad smile. Lady Rei chuckled, "Young love." I blushed upon hearing the word "love." Hidan, I supposed, did the same, "B-Ba-chan, it's not love!"

"I'll help you two," she started with a grin, "First, lets get this place cleaned up and find somewhere to ditch these bodies."

"Wait! We can turn them in for money!" I said with a hint of excitement. They shrugged, Hidan making a remark regarding Kakuzu. Afterward, I took the bloodied sheets and cleaned them, slaving to relieve them of stains and letting them soak in warm water and a soap solution. I finished cleaning the apartment with the sheets still soaking, and picked up the bowl I kept Ran's parts in. I made sure I got every little piece of her, down to the smallest smidge of fluff. It befuddled me: I remembered she said that she'd always be around.

I greeted him and Lady Rei as I finished, "When should we leave for the Demon Country?"

"I'm guessing two days would be good, ne? I have to find someone to mind the shop and look over my plants back home."

"That should be fine. Hidan will have to take his vacation leave, and I'll have to explain this all to Naruto somehow," I replied.

"Well, I better get going, ne? It'll be time to open shop as soon as I make it yonder," she said with a sigh. Hidan and I thanked her once more as she left. As soon as the door shut, I simply fell and covered my eyes to keep myself from crying, "God, I'm such a wimp." Hidan frowned and picked me up to set me on the bed by him, "Could you seriously quit talking like that? Fuck, Mina-chan... give yourself some credit here..." Hidan said quietly, "Just because you show emotion doesn't make you a pussy."

"Hidan, my guardian angel died. Does that mean I will, too?" I asked. In the blink of an eye, Hidan shoved me onto my back, his hand around my neck and his face close to mine, "I said to shut the fuck up! You're not going to fucking die, so cut that shit out! It's not funny, and just because you're upset doesn't give you _any_ authority to be a royal bitch! You act like I don't even give a damn about this shit or you for that matter!" The fury in Hidan's eyes was evident, and it began to scare me. I pulled his hand from my neck and kissed it, while sitting up. "I'm sorry, Hidan... I just feel so... helpless." He planted a kiss on my head, "Let's get some rest while we can. You'll feel better if you sleep some."

* * *

When I woke up, a sticky note was stuck to my forehead, covering my field of vision. I took it off and read the printed scrawl.

_Mina, I didn't want to wake you up to say bye for the day. You were sleeping like a rock and snoring, so I left you alone. I'm sorry I got so upset with you earlier, but I'm already scared to hell and back that someone will hurt you. I don't need you to go apeshit on me, too, y'know? Anyway, sleep well. And get in a better fucking mood._

_- Hidan_

I growled at the last sentence unhappily and set the paper on my nightstand. Suddenly, an idea struck me; it was only one o' clock, so I had plenty of time to do what I had planned and not get caught! I snickered evilly to myself and leaned over the edge of the bed, feeling around for a certain something, and once I felt it, I held it in the air, "AHA! HIDAN'S DIARY-THING!" The book was leather-covered with a small buckle around it to keep it in one piece. I'd never really wanted to go through his shit till then: it wasn't like he'd know I looked in it anyway. I bet he wrote all about sex- oh! Or maybe he wrote about his "adventures with Jashin"! I opened the first page and my expectations flew out of the window. The few words written on the first line read: "_I guess this will be a sort of memoir. I'll be around for a while anyways. I can't come up with a title that isn't stupid as fuck, but for now I'll name it 'Raion to Tora'."_ Under the words were two sketched animals- lion and tiger- sitting beside one another, looking forward; their eyes almost peered into me. I didn't know Hidan was an artist! The date in the corner dated back before I was even thought of, back more than twenty years. The page was dirtied, lead smeared across it from the its age. I flipped through it- it actually was like a diary. There were small drawings, paragraphs about the people he'd met, rants about Jashin and the heathens surrounding. He talked about girls from time to time, and I grew a bit jealous, but upon realizing they were most all dead, that jealousy fell to a certain sadness that I had for Hidan. Literally flipping through the years contained in large numbers of pages, I found the most recent entry, dated up to a few days ago. It was so simple, yet... so gorgeous. A drawn rose shaded in all of the right places was centered in the page, and text was at it's left side.

_"Jashin is finally coming to accept this... this... girl. And so am I. I hate attachments. I hate people. They fucking piss me off. I don't understand how I feel." _I frowned lightly. As much as Hidan put up his badass attitude, he was hurting deeply. I hadn't thought about how he felt, and I thought of myself as selfish at that moment. Everyone he came even remotely close to caring for would die. That thought was sobering, and I didn't bother to look through the book anymore. I returned it to its place as it had been before. Silently, I changed into my sundress and pulled my cardigan and backpack on, walking out of the door to try to find Naruto.

Continuing through the village, I stopped at the bakery to pick up a bagel for breakfast. The door's bell chimed, and I saw Hidan look up at me, subtle concern in his eyes. When I reached the desk, he smiled, "You just woke up, didn't you? Lazy ass." I hopped up and kissed him, "How can you always tell?"

"You always look dead-tired until you've been awake for three hours," he explained, "In three hours, you'll pop up and be your normal, bitchy self." I slapped him and crossed my arms. "Get me a bagel, you wanker..." The immortal laughed and did so, knowing what I wanted on it.

"Hot chocolate, too?"

"Yes, please. Oh, and have you seen Naruto around?" Hidan set the bagel in front of me and let his head fall back in a bored demeanor while letting a machine pour my warm beverage. "Nah. He said something about a mission though, didn't he?" Popping a top on the cup, he set said item down by my food.

"That's right... I have to find a way to get those bodies to the Hokage's building without him then..." I trailed worriedly, then dug around in my pocket for some money. Hidan shook his head, "I'll cover it for you."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. A bagel and hot chocolate as payment for that blowjob, sweetcheeks." The Jashinist winked and I, nervous, blushed brightly, grabbing my things and running out like a nervous little kid. The last thing I heard was him cracking up in the wakes of my embarrassment, yelling, "Y'know, I owe you a little more than that. See ya in bed, Mina-chan!" Sipping carefully on the drink and nibbling my food, I made my way to see Shizune at the Hokage's. It wasn't too hard to find the woman as she buzzed up and down, back and forth all through the place. Finally grabbing her attention, she jerked to a stop with an exasperated smile. Ton Ton sat at the girl's legs wiggling her nose, producing small oinks.

"Shizune-ne-chan!" I beamed, "Busy as ever, I see." Shizune and I had grown decently close. I honestly looked up to her for being so composed mentally, even though she obviously was freaked out over things constantly. If she ever felt overwhelmed with Tsunade's paperwork, she asked me to help. She knew I didn't do much around town alot of the time anyway. She sighed, "Yeah... today's been pretty hard on the stress levels... But since you're here, how are you? Need anything?" She was like a big sister, hence "Shizune-ne-chan."

"Well..." I scratched the back of my head, "I have some bounty to turn in, to put it simply..." Her smile fell a bit and I explained, words full of haste, leaving out the fact that the assassins were only here to kill me and my S-rank-criminal friend...

* * *

Once I got my payment, I thanked Shizune and made my way to the Konoha bank to exchange the banknote I'd received.

_"You're getting a really good pay for these four... please don't pass out on the floor. I don't need another thing to clean up," I recalled Shizune saying. Ton Ton oinked in agreement, pushing a small dustbunny around with his snout. I looked over the banknote she handed me, "S-S-SIX THOUSAND? That's... that's crazy!"_

_"Well, you're a good help! We're indebted," she said happily._

I sighed, standing in line and wondering what I'd do with the money. A few ideas popped up in my mind, and I decided I'd save half of it into my and Hidan's savings account. The bank teller lazily greeted me, "Good afternoon."

"Urm... hello. I need to turn this banknote in- I need half of it saved into my savings account and half given to me in normal currency," I stated, handing the paper over. The teller yawned and nodded. "Registration?"

"Himura Minami," I said while trying not to stutter over my alias-last name, "Former Rain Village ninja, age nineteen." The bank teller had me fill out a few forms, then retrieved my money, handing it to me in a small sack. I thanked him, walking out of the large building. I decided to myself that I'd take Hidan to that restaurant tonight. I'd have to apologize to the people for not showing up the previous night due to _a certain immortal bastard,_ but I think he would enjoy going, whether I forced him or not. And he would dress up. I'd make sure of it.

* * *

When Hidan made his way back to our apartment after work and walked in, he greeted me with a smile in his voice. He walked in the bedroom, and I spun around, chucking the object nearest to me, which happened to be a shoe that landed his forehead. Hidan tipped over and rubbed his head angrily, "Hey! I was in a fucking good mood until you did that! Didn't I tell you to get in a better mood and to stopping bitching?" The immortal began to sit up, and I threw the other, barely missing him, "What is your fucking deal, _woman?"_

"You can't see the surprise!" I yelled while making my way to the threshold and slamming the door. Hidan's rage boiled a bit, "That's no fucking excuse for domestic abuse! All you had to do was tell me to not come in!"

"You would've came in anyway!" I retorted while changing into my silky cocktail dress and slipping my heels on. Outside the door, Hidan shrugged, knowing I was right. I popped my head out the door after opening it. The male looked at me lazily, and I shoved some clothes in his face. "Change into those," I said, closing the door once more. Hidan flipped through the outfit, realizing it was a legitimate suit. He facepalmed, "I don't want to wear this shit!"

"Well, I'm getting all dolled up, so you have to also. The restaurant we're going to has a dress code- that's how fancy it is! Honestly, it won't kill you to do something nice with me." I slid out of the door, bringing his nice shoes with me and setting them by him. I walked passed him into the miniature living room, and he silently motioned toward the doorknob.

"Don't even _think_ about it," I hissed dangerously- the Jashinist jerked his hand away- then sweetened my tone up, "It's a surprise for the last time, silly! Now get dressed, and hurry! We'll be late!"

Once Hidan changed whilst growling at his clothes, I tied and straightened a tie around the neck of his white button-up that contrasted with his black pants. He wiggled his way out of wearing the jacket, somehow convincing me he couldn't wear it; he looked pretty sexy in the shirt alone anyways. Hidan dramatically acted like he was choking and tugged at the side of the tie, "This is too tight! Loosen it!" I glared at him and jerked it.

"I said loosen, not tighten!"

"I heard you, you pussy," I retorted, then loosened it, "You just hate having your chest covered up, don't you?" I smoothed his shirt down over his sholders and slung my small purse over my shoulder as we walked out of the apartment. After henge-ing into his Konoha disguise, he laced his fingers, putting them behind his head, "Well, think about it. I was in the Akatsuki and didn't have to worry about shirts at all. It's a big difference compared to recently! I have to wear shirts constantly! All day till I get home!" I giggled at him, rolling my eyes, "But you look adorable in white. A white button-up, nonetheless."

"You're just saying that..." he trailed. I shone a smile, "I'm not actually. You look extremely handsome."

"When don't I, though?" He asked arrogantly. I knocked him in the stomach for that one. "I think you'll like where we're going. It's where I wanted to take you last night."

"My date idea was better!" He argued.

"I was going to take you to the same place afterwards!"

"No, you weren't! You're just jealous that you hadn't found out about it before me!"

"Really now? How'd you find out about it then?"

"Konan, actually. And you? From that stupid Naruto-kid?"

"I heard about it from Konan, too, and Naruto isn't stupid! He's actually really sweet and kind."

"Yeah, right, the kid is A.D.D. He can't focus on one thing for five seconds, and he's dumb as fuck." I shot him a crosshurt glare. I could always tell the two disliked each other, but I didn't know Hidan disliked him that much. "Sounds like a certain immortal I know..."

"Ba-chan?"

"No, you! You're so insensitive sometimes!" I yelled, "I swear, if you say anything to him, I'll be extremely mad."

"You gonna do anything about it?" He arched a brow and I threatened him as we continued walking. A sudden flash of orange appeared in my peripheral vision, and Hidan perked up, waving his hand around, "Oi, fuckhead! Naruto!" My jaw dropped. He was really going to do it. Naruto returned a greeting as he walked our way. Hidan snickered to himself, and I punched him in the nose, looking away from him. The blonde stopped in his tracks, his eyes wide. "Should I... leave you two alone...?"

"No, I just wanted to let you know that you're a stupid little fuck and a shit ninja," Hidan said through gritted teeth. People around us stopped to stare and shot Naruto saddened glances. My anger boiled over the top, and I didn't bother to reply to Hidan. Naruto reddened with fury and as he started yelling back, I grabbed Naruto's hand alongside his attention. My head lowered, I gave a shaky sigh, "Ignore him. He's jealous. I'm sorry that he's such a dickhead." Naruto blinked from me to Hidan and back before smiling and shaking it off. I resumed the way Hidan and I were going and when he caught up to me, the Jashinist just laughed. "Did you see his face? Ahaha, that was great!"

"Fuck you," I hissed, staring ahead while trying my best not to trip in my heels, "What's up with your sudden dickhead attitude? Did I go wrong when I gave you a blowjob or something? Was I too nice? Did that make you feel like you could bitch about every goddamn thing in the book, Hidan?"

"You don't like me anymore do ya? I bet you wanna get rid of me!" Hidan mused loudly, scoffing angrily. I stopped in my tracks, avoiding his gaze, "I'm not tired of you, just your bullcrap. I've had some sort of fucked up connection with you ever since we met... we yell and scream at each other and you annoy me to no extents and make me feel horrible... and I don't know how you feel about me, but even though you put up that tough-ass front and you're an all-around bitch, I still care for you. There's just something there in my head that tells me to stay and to try to be nice. And even without it telling me to, sometimes I just want to be with you anyways. You're like a part of me. I want to keep living with you, and I want us to yell at each other, and I want to prove that..."

"Spit it out, Mina-chan," Hidan demanded, "Seriously."

"I want to prove that I'm not like other girls you've met, screwed, and left in the dust. Or the fact that I can be different from the other girls you've cared for or even the ones you've loved," I rambled shyly.

"I don't love," he corrected. I chuckled to myself, "_That's not what you wrote in your little diary... Denial. Cute, isn't it?"_ Glancing at him, I even saw a flustered blush.

"See? I told you it was stupid," I stated quietly. Hidan held my hand and pulled me onward, "It wasn't that bad. I think... I think that, well... I'm glad you feel the way you do... you know..."

When we reached the restaurant and were seated, the air between Hidan and I hadn't change much. There was almost a sense of hostility, and that saddened me. After we had our food- grilled ribs for Hidan and a cheeseburger for myself- I watched as his lavender orbs scanned the establishment in awe. "Wow... this place really _is_ fancy as fuck..."

"Calm your mouth down..." I stepped on his foot and he murmured curses quietly. I took a bite of my sandwich; my taste buds figuratively cried out in joy. "Oh my god, this is so good." Hidan merely nodded, digging into his plate of food soundly. Normally I'd do the same in the same un-ladylike manner, but I just felt so uneasy.

"What's wrong, Mina-chan?" The Jashinist paused to ask. My face fell and I pushed my plate away from myself, "Something doesn't feel right." He arched a brow at that.

"I don't mean to bring it all back up, honestly, but just tell me why you did that to Naruto," I demanded. He guffawed loudly, "Well, I mean, I don't like him. I was just fucking around though, he's not that stupid. He at least tolerates you." I laughed at that, and he winked and tried to make me feel better about what happened. I sighed and sipped my drink, "Don't do that anymore. At least to my friends."

"Alright, alright, damn," he groaned, then perked up, "Now eat! I don't want to look like the only uncivilized one at this table." Chuckling, I picked my cheeseburger up and dug in; the two of us had to have looked like pigs, but that was just me and Hidan. I was glad that the two of us weren't your typical "couple." Hell, were we really a couple at all? Did he not know the concept of dating and the fact that the guy had to ask the girl out? Hidan had just told a stupid story about him walking in on Itachi crossdressing that made me nearly knock over from laughing, but something scurried across the table which stopped our volume altogether, smiles automatically vanishing.

"Did you see that?" He asked. I froze, nodding. I slightly nudged my plate and a huge cockroach scuttled across the table; I couldn't help but shriek as Hidan stood up and cracked his own dirtied plate down onto the bug. I felt sad that it had to die like that, but surely the little bugger would be happy in the clouds where the squished cockroaches roamed free. The whole restaurant was silent. I stared at Hidan and he gathered the broken ceramic in his hand. A short, little man waddled into view, sweaty and red. "What's the meaning of this?" Hidan furrowed his brow and chucked the ceramic at him, "This place is roach infested, that's what! I'm calling the health department and I want my meal free!" We ended up getting out with a free meal as the little man, the manager, pleaded us not to call the health department. Of course, neither of us would have anyways. Hidan just didn't want to pay for the high-priced food.

"Well, that was..." I trailed, twirling my hair, "... bad. I'm sorry it sucked." The tall male cackled happily, "Just shut up, Mina-chan." He ruffled my hair and I pouted shyly.

"Good thing we got out of that. How much money have you spent on clothes for this night anyway?"

"Well... a couple hundred..." I muttered sheepishly. His eyes widened, "Oh, wow... you better be glad I'm not like Kakuzu. I think he would've cut your tits off for that." I shrugged casually, "That's a pretty good reason as to why I'm not interested in him. He looks old, too."

"Ha! He does like like a pretty old motherfucker," he agreed, "So are we heading back to the house?" I blushed; he sounded like we were married or something... silly man. I cocked my head thoughtfully, "Actually, there's something I want to do first."

* * *

Well, I hope you liked this chapter! The next one is planned to be a lemon, eheheh. I obviously need to brush up on my lemon-writing skills anyway.

The story is already half way over, amg.

Updates soon. ^^


	21. Another Note

Hello, all! This isn't a chapter update, though I have one in the works currently. ^^'

I just wanted to say that I'm aware Mina is a slight Mary-Sue, if not a total one. Sigh, I don't like to admit that. I've been trying to kinda work on that. If you have any suggestions or comment, feel free to pm/review/whatever them to me; it'd be much appreciated. -heart-

Maybe if I write future canonxoc stories, they'll be a little better.


	22. Doubleknotted Ties

Eheheh... so much for weekly updates. Ah, fuck it. And again, postponing the lemon. Sorry, guys, but I really haven't been in the groove to write one of those. It was why I hadn't updated sooner, so, y'know, it'll have to wait. ;~;

I have a poll up. Vote in it if you get bored or something.

Feedback on this is much appreciated, by the way!

I hope you guys like it anyways!

P.S. Huge thanks to Alli for reviewing with such a sweet message. Thank you kindly, dear. I should be updating more often in the near future. -hearts-

* * *

Kakuzu walked into his and his old partner's room with briefcase in hand. Flipping the light on, he realized how quiet it was without Hidan and his little Minami running around the currently silent base. The stitched man sat his things down on Hidan's empty bed. Could Kakuzu, the cool and stoic man, really miss that foul-mouthed Jashinist or the annoying member that went around reading porn? Kakuzu scoffed at his thoughts and organized the contents of his desk. A gift-wrapped box sat atop his pillow. Picking it up, he found the silver paper littered with small doodles of what looked like Hidan holding his scythe, yelling Jashin nonsense, and Mina by him, peace sign in the air. He rolled his eyes, seeing the Jashinist symbols, speared people, little neko-versions of Mina, and poor drawings of Kakuzu himself on the backside of the present. He casually pulled the covering off, moving to open the black container. Jade eyes widened largely in disbelief. A small paper fell idle to the ground; he eyed it, holding it up to read:

_Kakuzu-chaaaaan,_

_We just miss you, oh, so much that we're giving you two thousand even. Thank Mina-chan. She's too nice for her own good. Don't jizz your pants too hard, old man._

The somewhat sloppy scrawl turned to curly cursive on the next line, which Kakuzu guessed was Mina's input.

_Don't mind that idiot, Kakuzu-sama. Anyway, I'm sure you'll enjoy this present. Hopefully you'll find this useful! Really though... don't jizz too hard..._

_We love you, hehe~_

_- Hidan and Minami_

Kakuzu rolled his eyes, glaring at the hearts drawn around his name. Okay, so he missed them a _litt__le._ Not enough to mean anything.

* * *

I excitedly unlocked the door, fiddling with the keys. Hidan laughed in amusement, asking, "You're shaking like a leaf- what're you so nervous about?" I eyed him coyly for a moment, then pulled him inside, locking the door behind us.

"Damn, my fuck-senses are tingling," the Jashinist said smugly. My stomach flipped. Upon motioning into the bedroom, Hidan laughed loudly. I blushed in embarrassment; I'd worked hard on this! I earlier pushed the two twin-sized beds in the room together, moving the nightstand into a corner, then- using a horde of pillows- made a small chair which leaned onto the bed. Across from the seat, I'd set a small boombox down. Hidan pulled me into his chest, "You've been wanting to set this whole thing up for us for a while now, huh?" I chuckled into his chest, gingerly hugging him back, and nodded. I scooted over to the chair with him and pushed him down into it. His expression burned with a sort of smug look that sent tingles down my spine and had horribly dirty images running through my mind. I set out candles to light them carefully and the flames flickered lighting the room with the assistance of the moonlight pouring into the apartment. I turned the stereo on, letting a random cd play; neither of us would care for it later on anyhow. He shot me a small smile and laced his fingers behind his head when I started to find a beat in the music, allowing my body to move with it. I shook my hair across my shoulders, dancing, rolling my hips.

"So underneath your clumsiness, you actually have some sort of rythym, huh?" He laughed and wet his lips.

"Do you _want_ to get laid or not?" I growled jokingly. We both did know I was pretty clumsy... Hidan chuckled, "I know your type. Mock innocent and prissy in general but a total animal in bed- I bet you fit that description perfectly." I blushed and avoided his gaze as I unzipped my dress and let it pool around my heels. "Well, mister womanizer, how can you tell?"

"It's not that I'm a womanizer. Think of how old I am- I just have experience under my belt," the Jashinist declared sincerely, looking me up and down, "The way you walk and talk and look at me, how you move your hips when you dance. And let's not forget the lacy bra and panties you have on with those sexy heels. You want me to fuck you hard, don't you? You're just begging for it." The dirty talk was killing me; my knees were made of jelly and were shaking under my weight. His purple orbs looked onto my own green, and unspoken words drifted back and forth between us. Lust and ferocity rising in eyes, Hidan beckoned me toward him. Dropping onto my knees, I crawled over and did so, straddling his lap. That was when the kissing began; the almost feral sort of need we had shared for so long crept out through the kiss, seeming to pull us closer and closer together, tongues wrestling madly.

"You're over dressed," I muttered between kisses, fingering the buttons of his shirt shakily as his hands ran up and down my back, groping my ass roughly. He shrugged out of the fabric and rushed to undo my bra and attacked the unveiled and erected pink nubs, fondling sporadically. I scratched my fingers through his hair, tugging lightly alongside releasing small mewls of adoration toward the man before me. My heart pounded and my mind raced: it was finally going to happen. Tonight, Hidan was going to take my virginity. That was an odd sentence that I rolled around between my teeth.

Suddenly there was a series of loud knocking. I could have swore that my jaw fell off it's hinges. Hidan grabbed me by the hair to keep me from answering the door, and I mentally face planted. He could be so rude sometimes, but when he continued with his ministrations, I seemed to forget about that. He kissed between the valley of my breasts and moved upward to my ear, licking the shell of it hastily. The knocks were heard once more, and after making Hidan let me go, I threw my dress on and ran to answer the door.

"Hey, Mina-chan! Shizune told me all about what happened as soon as me, Sai, Sakura, and Yamato got back, so I figured I'd come check on you, asap! How's everything? Are you okay? Hideki alright, too?" I sighed, listening to Naruto talk way too quickly, ranting and rambling. When he opened his mouth to continue, I covered it quickly. Naruto blinked in surprise then laughed sheepishly.

"Everything's fine, Naruto-kun. Honestly!" I said with a polite nod. He cheesed and returned the gesture. "Oh, the bookstore keeper wanted me to get you two. She said she needs help with something or another... I dunno, but get movin'!" I thanked him and he left soon after. Shutting the door begrudgingly, Hidan had managed to make his way behind me. "So what'd the little fuck need?"

"Lady Rei needs us," I continued, "Put some shoes on."

"W-What? But that's not fair! Mina-chan, come on, she can wait! You have to take care of this!" Hidan argued, pointing to him crotch. I growled audibly at the man and shook a fist, "Go jack off if it's really necessary, but hurry up and get dressed! I'll leave without you if I have to, y'know!" I said while walking past the jawdropped and clearly unhappy male. Stripping the dress once more, I threw my normal attire on and tossed my hair into a bun. I pulled my things together in my bag, being sure to take a rectangle box with me. It was off-white and decorated with red and pink flower patterns. Afterwards, I returned to the doorway. "Hurry up, Hidan!"

"Hey, shut the fuck up! I'll take as long as I need to!"

"Yeah, without me, you bastard..."

"I heard that! It's not my fault," he remarked, appearing by me whilst buttoning his shirt, "You obviously don't like me as much as you've led me to believe."

"Where did that even come from? Elaborate," I ordered and pulled him out of the apartment with me. Hidan managed to slam the door with his foot as he scurried behind me, "I shouldn't even have to! You see, normally girls that like guys like me will do what the guy asks. Or at least try to act like she wants me to happy." With an eye roll, I trudged on. "I'm really not up for agruing with you, considering how much we have as of late. You can think whatever you want to in your little peabrain, but keep in there where I can't hear it, alright?"

"Pff! You definitely don't like me! You're basically telling me to shut up, and you're not even joking around about it this time. You know, you're- blah, blah, blah!" Hidan continued ranting, and I had to mentally shake myself to find a moment of inner silence. It was quite dark when we made it to Lady Rei's. She let us in, explaining that she'd gotten a young Yamanka girl to look over her plants and store for the next three days. They were the only days she could afford to, so we needed to leave right away. It wasn't a problem for me, though, I couldn't say that Hidan felt the same. I sensed he was a bit distraught. Sexually frustrated, perhaps.

Once outside of the village, I summoned Beppin and we hopped atop her back, flying South. Lady Rei scanned a map she'd packed, "If we make a straight shot, it should take a day and a half to get there. Doesn't sound bad, ne?" Considering what I had planned, that didn't come across as very peachy; I furrowed my brow and let Hidan answer for me, but he neglected to do so.

"What's ailin' you two? Havin' a little spat, ne?" Lady Rei questioned in her little-old-lady-mocking tone. When neither of us replied yet again, her gaze shifted between us and her quietness joined our own, "Well, I'll be darned..." Hidan sat at the tail of the bird, Lady Rei mid-back, and me atop Beppin's head. Maybe it was true that I didn't like Hidan after all. But no, that couldn't be right. Sure, I was pissed off at him for how he'd acted earlier on. Hell, and how he currently was behaving. The bastard had no care for anyone else, and yet he had the nerve to blame things on me all because we didn't finished our little sex session? Feh, how pathetic. This was a time of many when I wanted Ran around. I could carry her anywhere and talk about anything with her, and she just listened. Then of course, she bribed me into shopping and scoping for cute boys. I felt alone, needless to say. Almost like the earth was shunning me for "neglecting" Hidan. What kind of sick punishment was that anyway? All he knew was selfishness!

_Was he really... really that dumb? _

I patted Beppin's head lovingly, and happily, her eyes closed for a moment. I glanced at Hidan who was staring upward into the color-spotted night sky. Ground past beneath us rapidly, and as we neared my personal destination, I talked lowly to Beppin. She didn't seem to mind much. Soon, we descended a bit, which threw Lady Rei and Hidan off. I stood and breathed deeply, watching the water that was so far below us.

"What the hell are you doing, Mina-chan?" Hidan yelled, "You better not try anything funny!"

"Hush up, ya lil' wuss," Lady Rei spat, then looked to me, "What's going on, child?"

"You guys go on ahead. Don't try following me. Beppin will take care of you guys, and I'll catch up soon," I smiled slightly, "I don't know how long I'll be, but I'll make it." Finishing my sentence, I stepped off of Beppin, falling to the water below. I watched Hidan's face, admiring those wide eyes.

"Minami-chan! You're so dumb! Why the hell do you pull shit like this?" He cupped his mouth, "Why are you so fucking stupid?" I rubbed the spot where my heart would be located, eventually noticing the tears being shed. I touched them as they tried running up the sides of my eyes.

_Why was_ he_ so fucking stupid? _I laughed into the passing air. _He didn't know how much I loved seeing him happy. _Just before the hitting the water, I managed to focus my chakra and get a steady footing atop the lake. I stared forward to the many gorgeous lights ahead of me. So gorgeous. The tears kept coming for some silly reason.

* * *

"Hello, little lady, step on up and try the ring toss!" I heard from beside myself. It was just like before. With a fan in one hand and a purple ring in the other, the older man smiled largely at me, beckoning me forward. I watched him for a moment, and his enthusiasm died out a bit. I dug the rectangle box out of my bag and opened it, showing it to him. The big billowy tears gathered in my ears again. "They... they killed her..." The man placed his things down to gingerly take the box and touch the stuffed remains of Ran. Her purple-buttoned eyes shone under the festival glow. Suddenly he began laughing. Cackling, nearly. I clenched my fists and took her back, giving him a nice smack on the cheek. "Who do you think you are? This isn't funny!" His laughter died down to a chuckle, "You're a funny little girl, you know."

"What... and just what's so hilarious?"

"You mean you can't tell?" His brow flew upward, smile growing, "And Himeko didn't tell you?" The male shook his head and held a hand sign before tapping my nose lightly. I flinched and when I reopened my eyes, the lights had seemingly sunk into the ground. There was a simple darkness with lantern hung from the roofs of surrounding homes. I shifted around in confusion.

"That fair everyone loves so much is just a genjutsu, Mina-chan," he said.

"How do you know me?" I gaped in suspicion.

"Ah, my clan's an analytical one," he said happily, "I'm Tenshi Maro." He motioned me to follow him. I tapped my lip thoughtfully, "Tenshi... means angel..."

"Do you know how Himeko is able to become animate in her first form?" Maro asked. I denied, wondering what the connection between it all was. He directed me into what I was guessing his house and sat me down to fetch some iced tea.

"She used to be a real person just like you," he explained, "This whole village used to be like you. Each of our wings have their own stories, different patterned feathers with various thicknesses. We gained our wings through all sorts of rites of passage. But in essence, we're a clan of naturally divine humans. Never dying. Never rotting. Our souls strive onward after each blow, whether it be mortally fatal or a mere scratch. We were entrusted the earth long ago. It's a tale you can fabricate yourself. This island is where souls come to rest before leaping into the world once more," Maro said and motioned to a nearby window, "Have a look-see." I quickly did so to find what looked like small orbs floating above the surrounding treeline. Each had a different pastel color that almost sparkled. I gasped and ran to lean over the windowsill. I chugged the tea I was given and turned to Maro with a serious air about myself, "Is Himeko one of those souls?"

He shrugged unsurely, "There's a chance. It's hard to tell."

"Hey, Himeko-chan!" I yelled, waving my hand quickly, "Hey, are you okay?" There wasn't a significant change among the soul orbs that were wafting softly with the wind. I sniffed and set my cup on Maro's coffee table, "I have to get her back. Will she remember me?"

"It really just depends, Mina-chan," Maro rubbed his neck, "Sometimes events from past-lives are hard to remember... other times it just comes naturally. It's something that can't be helped however it turns out."

"Please take me to see her. Please do," I whispered sadly. The man sighed and agreed to do so, guiding me through the town to the largest building, where all of the pastel-colored orbs seemed to poise toward. The towering place seemed alot like an ancient temple, and frankly, I didn't doubt the possibility either. Climbing many stairs, the higher the floor we were on, the more people. At the top, there was a serene pond with koi fish that swam around gracefully and slowly. Over head, the orbs bumped the ceiling lightly and bounced, alot like balloons. I smiled at them; these souls were other peoples' version of Himeko from all around the country.

"That's the man that binds souls to inanimate objects. He is named Fusao. The people who make it to this island almost always come as tourists to the year-round festival. We give these objects as prizes to easily won games, because... well, everyone needs someone to look after them. Guardian angels are to be taken seriously, despite their original, container-like forms. They're the purest of souls compared to the rest of this horrid world." As Maro spoke, I watched the man whom sat at a sewing machine and worked on making small stuffed animals. When he finished stitching a small blue elephant together, he reached upward and a pastel yellow, orb-like soul slowly fell into his palm. He bond them together with something alot like ninjutsu- possibly a magic of sorts- and a moment later, the little elephant hopped to the ground while blowing its squeaky trumpet. I laughed a bit loudly which caught the magician's attention.

"Ah, Maro. What brings you here with this girl?" Fusao asked. I presented Himeko's box to the bindsman and he looked inside. Maro sighed a bit, "Himeko got into a slight pickle apparently. Some assassins caught the best of her." Fusao pulled the fabric onto his desk to look at its condition, "This shouldn't be hard to fix at all." The male began stitching and fixing the little cat to how she used to look. The stuffing was placed inside once more alongside all of the glistening pebbles that I'd gathered with her stuffing. Fusao lifted his hand once more and a pastel pink orb sank into it. I smiled happily as he bound the soul and set her on the ground. The plaid-patterned kitten meowed in relief, stretching thoroughly. When she lifted her gaze to meet mine, my heart began to beat so fast- I hoped she would remember me. Light enveloped the small kitten and when it cleared, Himeko stood before me with a smile. The taller girl simply hugged me, "I thought you'd go on without me, Mina-chan." I gripped her dress and sniffled in attempt to kept emotions at bay. "N-Never!"

After, I thanked Maro too many times to count, and his only request as a repayment was for Himeko and I to visit. I assured that we'd be back soon. After summoning another bird and setting to flight, Himeko returned to her Ran form. She was curled into a ball in my arms as I tried keeping the chilly air off of her. Ran purred happily; I couldn't focus on anything. I was so worried about what we'd face in the near future. More so, what I would face. I'd decided that this was my fate. If the Demon Country wanted my freedom, happiness, or life, so be it. It was time that they'd left the people around me alone. Especially Hidan and Ran.


	23. Reunions

Hello, lovelies! This chapter is a little short for many reasons. Mostly because I'm a lazy wiener. BUT PLZ STILL LUV ME.

Thank you so, so much to the three reviews I got. You guys make my heart melt with how kind you all are! I can't explain how much I appreciate it. I'll be sure reviewing back, don't worry! -heart-

Lately I've been trying to cut down the vulgarity in my stories (at least a little), because... I'm sure 40% of this story is made up of the word 'fuck' and 'shit' and 'damn' and 'asshole', etc. But mostly 'fuck.' Rereading this story kills me. It's so poorly written and there is SO MUCH subject-verb disagreement. But on another note, to make up for how Mary Sue-ish this story is, I have a huge twist for the end, oh my god. HUGE. Hopefully it'll make the story seem a bit more believable.

Also, I just figured out that so far, this story is exactly 150 pages long. I feel so fucking classy and accomplished.

Thanks for your time, readers!

* * *

It soon began to rain, and the two of us huddled together to retain what little body heat that we could. The summoned bird Himeko and I sat atop was much smaller than Beppin, and I'd only summoned her once in the past before, but she was just just as sweet as the previously mentioned bird herself. The raindrops that fell were way too cold for our liking, but time seemed to go by quickly nevertheless.

"So'd you get laid yet or what?" Himeko asked. I blushed furiously and gave her a generous thump to the head, "Himeko! ... Of course not... is that even a good question to ask someone like me? Especially while in a relationship with that thick-brained Jashinist?" She squeaked and rubbed the spot where I'd hit her, "Well, you made it to third base that one time when I was taking a shower, I figured maybe you'd hit a homerun by now!"

"Why're you using sport terminology with my sexual affairs?" I asked in slight confusion.

"Oh, come on," she shot back, "You should know this by now. First base is a kiss, second is a good make out, third is oral, and a home run is gettin' _all_ the goods!"

"How do you know that?"

"Everyone knows that!"

"No!" I rubbed the bridge of my nose, "I was asking how you knew about what I did with Hidan..."

Himeko giggled at me and swished her tail around herself to cover her small paws. "You two aren't exactly quiet, y'know. And when I walked out, all I could hear were nervous laughs from you. That, and you're pretty damn predictable, Mina-chan." I sighed and lowered my head.

"Either way, no, I haven't hit a home run with Hidan. We got the closest to it that we've been so far. We were both undressing, and Naruto dropped by."

"What a buzzkill! I bet Hidan was mad about that one," Himeko muttered smugly.

"It pissed him off, which pissed me off for him being pissed off about something like that. He acts like it's sex or die," I replied, "But then again, I don't know if I even want to be with him now."

"Whoa, what changed your mind? And for a guy, that's pretty much how it is with all of them. They use the head down south more than they use the one up top that has the brain in it," She reminded me.

"Isn't that the truth... just knowing that he's expecting me to be grade A in bed is alot of pressure. I've never come close to having sex, and he wants it every time we see each other, if that narrows things down a bit," came my sarcastic explanation, "I guess it's a typical girl thing. I don't want him to be interested in me for the physical aspects, and on top of that, he's said that he 'doesn't love' because he doesn't want to, really."

"Do you really think he was being serious about that?" The two of us eyed each other with frowns.

"It is Hidan after all, so I wouldn't doubt it," I mumbled, "It seems the way I feel for him isn't returned the same way."

"Do't be so quick to judge, Minami-chan. You'll need to talk to him about all of this before you make assumptions, y'know?" I nodded while running my fingers through the large bird's feathers.

_"Minami, what are your locations?" _A sudden telepathic voice rang in my head. For the first time, it was nice to hear Leader's voice.

"Somewhere between the base and the Demon Country, actually. I'm not exactly sure, but we're very close to our destination," I replied with a small smile. Himeko uncurled from the ball that she was laying in to give me a strange look but made a face of realization when I mouthed "Leader" to her.

_"Are you an idiot? What the hell do you think you're doing by trying to pull something like that without letting anyone know? I thought you could be at least a little bit more responsible with something like this," he snapped at me._

"I know, I didn't mean to disappoint you, but I was and still am low on time, Leader-sama. I'm sorry I couldn't say something, but I needed to do something quickly..." I trailed off with closed eyes.

_"Is Hidan with you? What has happened lately?"_ Leader inquired insistently.

"Hidan isn't far ahead of Himeko and I, and he has an escort. She's a Jashinist as well and keeps him in check. As for what else that's happened... well, the assassins are out of the picture to put it plainly. I'll have to explain it to you when we get back," I answered.

_"Oh, I know that the assassins have been out; you've been given the title of 'hero M.I.A.' for turning their bodies in, and now the Kyuubi is venturing after you to help with whatever you're trying to pull," _he said darkly. My heart fell... how could that be possible? Did Lady Rei really give that much detail to the girl that was looking after her plants? Maybe it wouldn't be as big of a deal since Hidan and I didn't bring our Akatsuki cloaks.

"We should be arriving at anytime, Leader-sama! I... didn't know that all of this had taken place... I assure things won't go any further awry!" I pleaded. The last thing I needed was for him to be upset with me, and even though I felt in my bones that everything would turn to hell before it was all over, I had to act like I had _some_ sort of control over things.

_"Kakuzu will be joining you soon enough. I have nothing more to say." _I sighed sadly and when Himeko tilted her head, asking what he'd told me, I explained it to her. One thing was for sure, Naruto had a very vague clue as to what direction he was headed in, so we had some time bought before he would be able to show up. I didn't see why Leader had to send Kakuzu after us, but I wasn't too upset with having reinforcements.

* * *

The sky was fairly bright when we had arrived to the outskirts of the Demon Country. Under a tree for shade, I could see Hidan's head poking out of a bush- or pile of leaves, whichever he was going for- very unstealthily. Lady Rei had made herself a small disguise nearby from what I could tell. I walked up to the male Jashinist and gave him a smack to the head, "What the hell are you doing?" Hidan nearly jumped out of his skins when he turned to see me, but the surprise turned to frustration.

"Me? I was hiding until you came and gave me away!" He argued. I huffed, shaking my head. "I could see your whole noggin sticking out of your hiding spot, you dimwit-" he laughed sheepishly in response "- but now that we're all back together, we should probably get a move on." Suddenly, he stood up and looked passed me to give Himeko a gander. He smiled widely, "Hime-chan! Where've you been?"

The silver-haired girl sweatdropped, "Ah... it's a long story."

"And where have _you_ been, Mina-chan? What the heck were you trying to pull by ditching us like that, you idiot?" Hidan yelled and pointed his finger in my face. I smacked it away and growled at him, "I saved Himeko!"

"No joke? I have to admit, it's pretty sexy that you went all badass and saved her, but you're really stupid sometimes. I thought you were trying to commit suicide when you jumped off of the damn bird!" He remarked loudly.

"You were just ranting about keeping your secrecy, why're you yelling so much all of the sudden? Anyways, you wouldn't've cared if I was killing myself. I mean, the only thing you did to try to stop me was tell me how stupid I am, just like you are no-"

"The time for us to continue on is nigh, ne, kiddies?" Lady Rei suggested as she walked ahead of us. We followed after as she and Himeko got acquainted, Hidan still trying to find everything in the world to yell at me over. I rolled my eyes numerous times. Nothing new anyways. Before we'd left from Konoha, Lady Rei had used something like a storage scroll to keep Hidan's scythe from plain sight, and she also used it for some of her own things; at this time, she figured it would be smart to hand him his possession, and when she did, his face lit up brightly. I couldn't help but giggle a little; he could be such a kid.

The gates to a large village were soon in arm's reach. The walls were huge, larger than I'd ever seen. A rusty maroon in color, some number of feet high and another number of feet wide. They reminded me much of the Konoha gates. Well, if the Konoha gates were on steroids, that is.

"You four, halt immediately!" Upon looking to the right, a group of large, buff men approached us with what looked like lances (or something alike them) in hand. Hidan crouched a bit, gripping the handle of his scythe tightly.

"Relax, young'n. There's no way we can make it through this place without being seen," Lady Rei commented. Upon questioning us time and time again, why we were there, what we wanted- the group of men lead us to a large palace in the heart of the busy village. I was hopeful that we would be directed to the man above all of the shit that had been going on, but my hopes had been shot down in an extremely short matter of time.

"Oh my god, something crawled on my foot! Eeeep!" Himeko squealed, then whined, "Are you really putting us in your nasty dungeons? This place is not suitable for a girl of my stature! Hello, do you hear me? Hablo ingles? Hey, fucker!" Hearing Himeko's outburst caused Hidan's own: "Yeah, for real! What the hell are you guys planning anyways? You think we won't be able to get out? Think twice, you shi-"

"Shut up," one of the men said plainly, "Neither am I authorized to associate negotiations with the enemy, nor do I wish to." He opened a cell and directed us in recklessly. My eyes had finally adjusted to the dark the best that they could. The only light sources were the torches that were lined across the walls and pinned up every few yards or so along the halls.

"Mina-chan, is that you, un?" That... that horrid... _speech impediment. _I turned to the source of the voice so fast that blood nearly rushed to my head. Across the hall was another line of jail cells, but directly before me were a pair of eager and bright blue eyes, a slight smile as well.

"What the hell are you doing here, barbie? You managed to get caught by a bunch of pussy Demon Country fags, huh?" Hidan roared. It grew immensely quiet, and Deidara stared at him in disbelief. I smacked my forehead.

"Hidan... you're so dumb..."

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I'll be writing as much as I can. Hopefully I'll have the next update within a couple of days.

Reviews are always loved and are so encouraging.

Thank you for reading! :3


	24. Dead Space

I bet you guys weren't expecting this update so soon. Two in one night is crazy for a slow updater like myself. I hope you like this. It has the twist that I'd previously mentioned.

Please give me feed back? Thanks, lovies! -heart-

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For some reason, things didn't seem to be fitting together too well. There was something that was... off about the air of Hidan, Deidara, and the revealed Sasori who made no attempt to make himself known to my small group. I sat on one of the few uncomfortable bed rolls and ran a hand through my hair. Himeko sat by me with her chin propped up on her knees. "Were you expecting things to go this way?" I shot her a short glare and stayed quiet, listening to Hidan bicker across the way with Deidara and provoke Sasori the best he could. Shouldn't we have been trying to get the hell out of the dungeon to figure what the hell's been going on here? Deidara and Sasori had been stripped of their personal belongings a while back- Deidara's explosive clay was one of the firsts to go without fail. I stood up hastily with a frown, "What are you guys waiting for? Shouldn't we be trying to figure a way out of this place? We're S-ranked criminals for Jashin's sake. A few bars can't hold us in for long!"

The boys simply looked at me before Sasori spoke up, "It's no use." What determination I had left fell in on itself when I heard Sasori say that. He wouldn't've lied about that and if it were easy to escape, he and Deidara would've been long gone by now. Maybe he really was right. Himeko arose to join me and she smiled, "Of course we can get out of here! Have you all forgotten who I am? Gee, give me some credit around here!" She held a hand sign up and a small flame flickered to life along the bases of the bars that made up the prison cell. The heat intensified and after a bit, the metal melted enough for us to get out. But... surely that wasn't it! Danna had to have been lying- Himeko got us out of the cell within thirty minutes of being locked up! That's when I was certain that something was clearly wrong... it was a genjustu maybe? Right...? Either way, I couldn't figure it out at the time, and once Himeko, Lady Rei, and Hidan had filed out, I followed suit. When Himeko offered to help them out of the cell, Sasori refused to let her do so and to come back for them, so we moved on. I ran ahead to join Himeko's flank. I furrowed a brow and muttered, "Do things seem weird at all to you?"

"God, I thought I was the only one that felt that way..." She responded with concern. The four of us remained quiet as we scaled the suddenly seemingly deserted halls. Once a large door frame with intricate woodworking details became visible, I knew that we were in the right place. The air felt thick, and when I opened the door, my bones practically weighed ten times more than they normally did. The door swung open, and to my surprise, it connected to a completely empty room. The far wall was made entirely of windows, and in front of the windows stood a fairly large man with a hefty mustache. A small pair of glasses hung at the edge of the nose he looked down over, upon the city. His hand remained behind his back. "There's something funny about this place, no?" His voice was deep, and I cleared my throat to answer, but when I tried to, nothing escape me.

"Rather, there are some thing_s_ that are funny about this place. One being that time is perceived differently by your kind. Whereas ten minute in this land translates to approximately the time it takes from sunrise to sunset... Perhaps longer. Another thing is tha-"

"Hey, you motherfucker! I have a proposition, and you better listen well, because I'm done listening to your bullshit!" I yelled shakily. The man turned to us, amused. With clenched fists I said, "I'm the one that stole the documents. But I managed to talk to Dorobo in Konohagakure, and she said that a royal marriage must take place for you to even consider getting the hell out of my life. So the prince in Otogakure is open for your daughter, okay? Can you let off already?" As I finished my sentence, a set of footsteps sounded through the halls and stopped behind Hidan, Lady Rei, Himeko, and I. I turned to find Kakuzu, and my stomach twisted. Had that man really been telling the truth about time being perceived in a different manner here?

"K-Kakuzu-sama! What are you doing here?" I asked in a weak voice. He stared at me. Silence. Even though he was known for his stoic and cold attitude... his facial structure seemed further hardened. A few moments passed on and Kakuzu raised his arm laterally; within the blink of an eye, his arm had been unstitched and propelled forward by tentacles, out of the door.

"Agh! Hey, w-what're you..." Things cleared up slightly. Kakuzu retracted his arm, and his hand was wrapped firmly around Naruto's neck in a death grip.

"Hell yeah, Kakuzu! Way to go!" Hidan yelled out loudly, "You got the little bitch in record timing!" An abrupt feeling of horror arose in my heart and a pain raced through my system.

"Mina... chan..." Naruto struggled out as he clawed at the hand around his jugular. Kakuzu looked down and closed his jade eyes. "It's about time you explain to him, Minami-chan."

"I... what do you mean?" I asked in a whisper. Hidan cackled, "Y'know, how you're 'part of the Akatsuki' and have been acting goodie-two-shoes so you could stalk him! Don't be a stupid bitch!" It felt as if winter took form herself and slowly crawled up my spine. Hidan's eyes mocked me, and mine seeked a way out of all of this. I never intended on hurting Naruto, and surely he knew that. Surely!

"Tell him that he was your assigned bijuu already, c'mon, don't be a pussy!" Hidan taunted again. What the hell was he trying to pull? I wrenched my sight from Naruto's pleading expression and locked onto Hidan. "What the heck? What are you trying to do, goddamnit?" Hidan laughed maniacally, bending over in hysterics, "You mean you don't know? You didn't figure it out once, like, at all?"

"Hidan, what the fuck are you talking about?" Himeko stepped toward the space between he and I, her pure face twisted darkly. He pointed at her, "You, too? _Ha!_ Minami, we were shitting you all along!" As hard as I fought it, tears brimmed my eyes and I bit my lip hard.

"You know as well as Kakuzu and Tobi and Deidara and Sasori and as well as everyone else that you are _not_ an S-rank criminal! You're so fucking pathetic! Just because you murdered your weak as fuck mom doesn't make you Akatsuki material! We only fucking had you around so we could catch the Kyuubi fucker!" He explained, his smile never wavering. Himeko walked up to the male Jashinist and punched him in the nose and followed up with a kick to the gut.

_I'd really been deceived this whole time. I'd been used by an organization of criminals that I had the audacity to trust and call my family._

"Mina-chan... is that... true?" Naruto gasped out. A scream escaped my throat, and I yanked at my hair. I really was stupid, wasn't I? "No, no, no, no, _no._ This was never supposed to... happen! Naruto-kun!"

"Too bad-" Hidan started as Himeko continued attacking him "-I didn't get to stick my dick in that tight ass though! We were pretty damn close, huh, Mina-chan? You _love me,_ don't you?"

"Fuck no, you fucking bitchmade dickhead! You can go fucking rot in a ditch for all I fucking care!" I ran past Himeko and pushed her out of the way to tackle Hidan to the floor and release the most hell I could on him. I straddled his stomach and pounded and pounded his head and chest the most could; an epiphany ran through my head though- he would easily beat me. He would easily _kill_ me. And from the looks of it... he didn't and never had cared. What was funny though, I'd actually fallen for the fake front he'd put on. I gave his chest one last hit and gave in. I knew how this would play out anyhow, so I might as well have said it.

"The person that you are now is not the person I love. The person I love is the Hidan that I've gladly spent the last few months with..." I wiped my eyes quickly, "Maybe through it all you were acting to be someone else. Whatever it was, I loved it. I know I'm not a part of the Akatsuki. That's clear, and it always has been. I'd known it from the start. Through luring Naruto in, I fulfilled my part in the 'cataclysm.' I'm probably not going to be around for much longer, but since the you that I loved is dead, I'm okay with dying as well. I have nothing else to stick around for. I just wanted to be around as long as you. No matter how big of an asshole you ever were, I always wanted you back. I wanted to convert to Jashinism so you'd have someone around for good. I wanted to be part of you." Hidan's smiled fell, and whether what I was saying got to him or not, I didn't know. I didn't want to know anything anymore. I touched his cheek a last time.

"Now it's your turn. Hit me. Kill me, Hidan," I whispered.

"My, my, you lot had her fooled extremely well. It's time we ended this," the man by the window said. Gingerly, he held his arms out as if he were aiming a bow and arrow at me. In his back hand, a blue arrow made of chakra came to sigh, and when he released it, I watched as it approached. Lady Rei jumped swiftly to my side, blocking the arrow with her metal compound staff. "Get up now, young'n. No reason to sit and let yourself get hurt over a sissy pretty boy, ne?" I smiled and Himeko lunged for Kakuzu. I looked Hidan in the eye for a moment.

"What're you looking at, bitch?"

"You tell me," I ordered quietly. He stiffened and sat up to return my gaze; he hands wrapped around my neck tightly and he smothered his lips across mine in a sloppy demeanor as he drove his thumbs deeper into my skin, crushing my airways. My vision grew darker and darker until all I could see was him. He face was contorted with an emotion I'd yet to see him sincerely portray. He hurt. His eyes glowed that subtle purple I'd come to love, and I felt the pendant he had given me start to sting my chest. I could imagine it glowing, just like his eyes were. That was the last sensation- the stinging- I had before I couldn't feel anymore. I prayed that Himeko, Lady Rei, and Naruto would be alright, and that Hidan- well, I prayed that Hidan would still feel how much I loved his stunning side. I hoped he would grasp that I tried loving as much of him as he allowed me to.

It was then that the last grains of sand had fallen; my eyelids began to fall shut, and I escaped into blackness.

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I've recently decided that I'll be adding to this story. It's not over, guys. :')


	25. Negotiating Mastah

Hello, all! I'm back after long, long contemplation of continuing this story. I *still* haven't revised all of this story, and I feel like that should be my top priority, but... I guess there's no fighting it -.-

I've gotten so many sweet messages and complements on this story, I feel obliged to continue. Atop that, I've really missed sitting down and writing about Mina and the gang. So that's that! Try to enjoy this update and give feedback if you will. Thank you kindly, readers. I understand this story is pretty... shitty, for lack of better words. So it means alot that you guys overlook the shitiness to the genuine parts. xD

Two-seconds-after-updating-edit: I have to mention something... the reviews I've gotten for chapter twenty-four... are ABSOLUTELY HEART-WRENCHING. I love all of you readers SO, SO much. Oh my god. Like, I seriously can't stress that enough. Such sweet, heart-warming messages I've gotten. Thank you, readers, for everything.

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Somewhere deep inside myself, I gathered the strength to force my eyes open. I found myself lying in a grassy field, limbs sprawled through the lush green grass. The sky seemed so close I could touch it: the bright stars were sprinkled across the ever-darkening sky. Though my body felt oddly heavy, I forced myself to stand up. There was a chilly breeze that accompanied a familiar sting starting mid-chest. There were trees bordering the field, behind them, a still nothingness lingering about. I couldn't make anything of this. I had no clue where I was. I brushed stray hair from my face and pushed onward toward the trees, and almost instantly, the beautiful vision of nature before had disappeared and I found myself in a dim hall. A stagnant stench of coppery-metal flooded the air, and my Jashinist pendant began to glow like it never had before, my chest burning because of it. I grasped the necklace and walked further through the blinding blackness. Soon enough, the room began to lighten up, revealing endless pearly white columns. Every other one column held a candle. The floor was tile, black and white. Many of them were broken or chipping apart. My footsteps invaded the settle silence, and they echoed subtly. The candlelight eventually held a dim purple glow. It grew more vivid with time, and once the light color had settled into a shade of byzantium, I caught sight of a throne before me.

Walls around it were made of differing lengths and widths of multiple bones; the theme was fitting for the figure sitting before me in its throne. There sat a man in dark robes accentuated with maroon and magenta bits of metal and decor. He held a sort of scepter or cane-like thing in his hand that had a brilliant silver shine to it. A large sheep skull masked said man's face- large horns curled to either side. His chiseled jaw could be seen from the sides, and in the eye sockets of the skull there were a subtle glowing orbs of color.

"Are you afraid?" The entity questioned- it came in a low rumble that reverberated throughout the building, shaking my very soul. I clenched my fists and looked straight back him.

"No. No, I'm not afraid," I replied, clenching my teeth.

"Why are you shaking then, mortal?" He prodded. Instead of a mocking tone, there was genuine curiosity. I chuckled aloud and smiled, "I'd say it's more excitement that anything, Jashin-sama." He returned the short laugh upon hearing my response.

"I think Hidan would be jealous," I added quietly, "Well, I suppose. It's hard to tell what's real and what's not anymore. I don't even know where I am."

"Your subconscious," he said in a simple demeanor.

"I'm not dead then," I mused quietly. I was in disbelief... Hidan killed me, did he not? I looked at my body and noticed the light glow my skin had to it. I took the rosary off and held it by the chain.

"No," he reiterated my thoughts plainly.

"Then... what happened to me?"

"The Demon Country is unlike the Leaf Village, Minami. They are very hostile people- unforgiving and merciless. They do not trust anyone," he continued, "They specialize in taijutsu and in genjutsu moreso than any other form of defenses. Only people that work well with genjutsu can find the true reality of the country in itself."

"So... the first step through the gates initiates a huge genjutsu then?" I asked. Holy shit, today had been full of SO MUCH mind fuck.

"Correct."

"So, I'm really still alive? I'm not dead? Hidan didn't hurt me?" My eyes began to sting lightly as I walked further toward Jashin, holding the necklace before me a bit.

"Look into yourself when you have doubt and you will find the truths you seek," he stated. I smiled happily and clasped my hands together with a new found joy about me.

"Do my work, Minami. Breathe deep and wake up." There was a long pause as I replaced the rosary around my neck, and the silence was nerve-wracking. Again, my vision began fading out into absolute darkness. Like a bell it came as he repeated himself: "Wake up." Immediately, color came rushing back into sight; it was bright. I blinked and winced trying to adjust to my surroundings. I rubbed my eyes and felt myself embraced in warmth. I gasped lightly and looked at the arms wrapped around me.

"Are you alright?" As he pulled away to look at me, Hidan appeared serious (for once), concerned. Those beautiful eyes peered into my own and I felt a sort of emotion boil inside me that I'd never imagined I could feel. I could've burst at that very moment. The emotion ra,n pumped crazily through my veins and I climbed on top of him shamelessly, hugging him and kissing him all over his face.

"H-Hey, Mina-chan..." Hidan started shyly. Silly man... he didn't mind embarrassing himself, but a little PDA got him all flustered. I just smiled and held him close, ignoring his bashful mumbles. I couldn't contain it. I held his cheeks in my hands and gave him a peck on the lips. I admired the look in his eyes and studied the structure of his face. This was the man that meant the most to me. In this moment, that was very evident. Nothing else really even mattered. Just him. It didn't even matter that I was straddling said boy in the middle of all of our subordinates. His face remained a deep crimson that deepened in color with each act of affection I made towards him, and I gave him a big, broad smile. A part of me never wanted this moment to end because I couldn't recall a moment that I was that damn happy.

"Ah, she's blatantly come to, ne?" Lady Rei's voice rang in my ears, she chuckled and I rolled my eyes at the laugh of hers that came after. I mimicked her light laughter as I rolled off of Hidan onto the ground by him. I could only admire the people around me. Himeko, Lady Rei, Deidara, and Sasori. I didn't linger long enough on each to infer what they were thinking- my mind was still racing. The happiness on my face never dissipated- no, not for a split second. Even in the dark cell we all were stuck in together- just like the cells in my makeshift dream- the colors seemed to swirl around me and become so vivid, it warmed my heart. The damp smell, the dripping that came from cracks in the ceilings, the stagnant taste of the air.

Himeko kneeled beside me and put a hand on my knee. "Are you alright, Mina-chan? What happened?" My eyes flickered between her eyes and mouth, my gaze then falling to the ground.

"It was genjutsu. Wasn't it?" It was more of a rhetorical question than anything. "I... I thought Hidan killed me. He strangled me. It felt so real, Himeko-chan..."

"Oh god, are you okay? You aren't really hurt, are you?" She asked quickly; it came out as borderline panic. I shook my head with a smile, "I'm totally fine. Please, don't worry." There was a silence that settled over us all, and I admired the cell we were stuck in. I stood and touched the bars gingerly.

"There's not a way out," Sasori stated blandly. "If you try anything to get out, the same pain will be inflicted upon yourself." The bumpy metal was cool against my skin.

"Surely they'll be coming for us soon, correct?" Lady Rei asked the short male. Sasori's dull eyes rested on her own and he tucked his hands in his sleeves, "If I had to take a guess, I would say so. Minami and Hidan are here, aren't they? It's my guess that these two are the ones they want."

"So we're in for a fight, are we, ne?" Lady Rei laughed again, but her slight joy was short-lived for a moment. Sasori's gaze cut through whatever sincerity she was attempting to show him.

"I don't know if I'd necessarily say that. I'm not fighting anyone anytime soon. For one, you lot have kept me waiting, and two, I'm not willing to help someone that's irresponsible enough to come directly to an enemy country unprepared and find themselves thrown in a cell, captured. It's pathetic-" he turned to look in my direction "-You can't justly call yourself a ninja, can you? Do you honestly think you're a serious S-ranked criminal just because you've killed your mother? That in itself is ridiculous. And of all people to kill, you killed the woman that gave you life. I'm ashamed to be in an organization with you."

"Hey, you cold ass bitch! You need to get the-"

"Hidan," I said, cutting him off. I shook my head quickly, then made eye contact with the puppet across the way. "Frankly, Sasori-danna, I know I'm not an S-ranked criminal. I never once called myself such. The only thing you and I have in common is that we are both rogue ninja. You learned to be strong through an academy and you had parents that fought for the Sand Village. I never attended an academy. My father was the only one that would willingly relay information to me, and the person that made me strong is the one that's now constantly drunk and ruined what childhood I had. You led a fairly admirable childhood, did you not?

"You didn't know your mother. I knew mine. I knew everything she was a part of. I knew what kind of woman she was. I listened to everything she said. I killed her because all she was capable of doing was hurting other people. Granted, I miss her at times for the mere fact she did raise me up to be who I am, but I don't think I'd change a thing if I were able to do so. So with all due respect, I have my reasons. On another note, how can you insult me for being captured and 'unprepared' while we're in the same situation?"

Sasori gave an unwavering glare but said nothing more. Deidara shot Sasori an uneasy glance, and I finally acknowledged him for the first time. He smiled lightly and threw a little wave my way. I hugged him and told him I was glad to know he was alright. There was an awkward air between us, and it became tense as Hidan watched so I chuckled and tended to the cell bars once again, looking about. "So what do we do when they come for us?" I asked quietly.

"It's hard to come up with a good strategy against such an unpredictable enemy," Himeko said, tapping her lip then crossing her arms, "But I mean, we'll figure something out, won't we? We always do!"

"Erm... yeah, I guess so," I chuckled and rubbed my neck. As if on queue, footsteps could be heard. The came distant first, growing closer with time. I walked to Hidan's side and grabbed his hand. We looked at each other feeling a little worried. I smiled anyways, declaring, "This should be a little fun, right?" He laughed a little and replied with a big, ole' "Hell yeah". A pair of guards tended to our cell door soon, guiding us through halls that, thankfully, didn't resemble the ones I saw in the genjutsu beforehand. Through a last door, we filed in a large room with bay windows. A desk was perched before them and in a fancy spinny chair, a hefty man twiddled him thumbs. He turned to us (reminding me of multiple spinny-chair scenes I'd previously seen in movies) and gave a faint smirk, "Ah, I've been waiting for you lot... Before any confrontation ensues, I'd like to make a proposition."

I looked to Lady Rei nervously and she smiled confidently which relieved me a little. He stood and held his arms out, "A truce." When I heard him offer a truce up, I think all the fighting spirit I had crumpled up into a little ball and shriveled away. I could just feel my subordinates deadpanning. I weakly held a finger up to him, "I-I'm sorry... what did you say? You'd like to declare war? Or slaughter each of us by decapitation?"

The large man chortled lowly and shook his head, "No, no, of course not. If you that then-"

"NO, um, no... That won't be necessary... I'm just a bit-"

"Fucking confused?!" Hidan finished for me in utter bewilderment.

"If I may, miss Minami," he motioned me toward him, and I hesitantly followed his hand. When I approached him, he smiled genuinely and leaned to my ear, telling me his proposition quietly. I swallowed hard and nodded. What else could I have done? By taking his offer, it'd be saving everyone's breath in the very least. After the negotiation, he had guards escort us to the outskirts of the village where we headed back for home.

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AND SO EIGHT MONTHS LATER, I DECIDED TO UPDATE

LOL WHAT'S UP Y'ALL

/sulking

I'll update more often okay thx :c


	26. Re:Volution

It amazes me how horRIBLE THIS CHAPTER IS I'M SORRY

I don't expect to get _any_ reviews on it because, well, I don't have time to revise/proofread. I'll fix it up later. xD

Enjoy, y'all.

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After the guards returned our belongs, they pointed the way back to Konoha, I sighed silently. I held my hands behind my back worriedly, "Himeko-chan..." I muttered. She looked back at me questioningly.

"You have to make sure everyone makes it back, alright?" She faltered and stopped walking by me, brows knitting together, "What do you mean?"

"I mean look after everyone. I have to stay here," I replied with a concerned smile, "Don't blow that fact up. I'll be home soon." She watched me for a moment, toward the group and back.

"Will you really be okay?" Himeko asked, "What's going on? Does this have something to do with what that guy said to you?" I nodded and after a moment, I motioned her off toward the group.

"Be careful, Mina-chan..." She said as she walked away. As they retreated, I could hear Hidan interrogating Himeko, demanding to know what was going on; a part of me knew he would come storming back to drag me off... but Himeko must have talked some sort of sense into him though because he didn't, rather gave me a saddened glance before they disappeared over the horizon. I took a deep breath and turned to face the guards that were some feet away, and as I approached them, they took either flank of me to direct me through town. A tall, skinny building was to become my new makeshift home for the time being. They let me in and bolt-locked the door on the outside. This place was... plain. A small kitchen, bathoom, bedroom, and a living room. No furnishings. White walls. Silence.

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I stared at the full body-sized mirror as the two middle-aged women around me primmed and prissied me up for today. It had been a few days since I began staying in this new village, and it was a place very... very far from home. That was for sure.

"Pucker, Miss Minami," one of them said. I did so, and she brushed a peachy-colored gloss across my lips. I rubbed them together and grimaced angrily once I had the air squeezed out of me. I glared back at the lady wrapping my waist, "Hey, take it easy back there!" The lady ignored me, tying the orange silky material in a large, bulky bow. They continued doing my makeup and fluffed my kimono out and pulled at my hair, getting it up off my neck atop my head.

"And we're finished..." One of them whispered, tucking a comb in my hair to keep my bangs away. I looked at myself, realizing that I actually did look really pretty. Despite that, I wasn't ready to be married off to some kid I didn't even know to fulfill the "truce." They helped me into some elegant sandals, the straps climbing my calves, buckling snugly atop them.

"My, my, Minami-chan... you're beautiful!"

"Yes, so have such a graceful aura... you must be so happy." I faked a smile and looked to the floor shyly. The taller of the two clucked her tongue, "But oh dear, you need to take this dreadful thing off!" She motioned to my Jashinist pendant. I jerked away from her, "Don't think about it. It stays." She stepped back a bit, sharing a surprised glance with her friend. It wasn't long before I was being led down a long staircase to the the auditorium of a large town chapel. I held a bouquet in my hands nervously, and once the beautiful piano was playing and I reached the priest and my soon-to-be husband, the ceremony began. He was dress in his own formal attire and looked to be possibly even younger than me. He was cute, I could give him that. But he wasn't Hidan's sort of cute, and that wasn't okay with me.

I looked through the veil at him and he smiled and mouthed, "You look beautiful." I awkwardly smiled at him and looked to the preacher. He had apparently started speaking already without me noticing, and at that thought, I giggled a bit.

"... Which is an honorable estate, instituted of God, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church: which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galilee, and is commended of Saint Paul to be honorable among all men: and therefore is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly; but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God." My stomach began flipping. The wedding was only the first part of my "plan", given, but I was still crazily scared. I never imagined as a little girl that my "wedding day" would go like this...

"Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. If any man can show just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold hi-"

And just as if I were the lead role in a typical, cheesy romance movie, the chapel doors were burst in. Everyone looked back to eye the fashionably late intruders, hearing guards calling after said person. "Just what in the good name of _Jashin _is going on _here?!_"

"Hidan!" I yelled feeling so happy, my head swimming. He ran down the aisle with fury in his eyes, "What the hell are you doing, Mina-chan? You're getting... you're getting married? Who is he?" He pointed to the prince, angrily gripping the three-bladed, blood-red scythe hardly in his other, and I opened my mouth to explain, but he didn't skip a beat.

"I knew you didn't give a shit about me! You fucking bitch! I fucking knew it, Jashin..." He covered his face with his hands, scrunching his eyes unhappily.

"Hida-"

"No, I don't wanna fucking hear it, woman! This is some bullshit, you leading me on! I _loved_-" He caught himself "-I... cared about you..." Was Hidan really serious? After all this time following him around to keep him in check, after all this time trying to show _just how much_ he meant to me, he was accusing me of doing just the opposite? He started up again ranting on and on, pissing me off more and more. When I finally had enough, I chucked the flower bouquet at his head to catch his attention finally and I stomped my foot. He glared at me- he was serious- and didn't falter as I yelled: "If you would just shut up for two seconds, then I could explain!"

"E-Explain what, sweetheart?" The groom beside me asked in a whimper. I chuckled darkly at him and threw a punch to his cheek, "Don't fucking call me that!" He staggered backwards, falling off the altar's stairs. Hidan stared at me, betrayal and hurt in his eyes.

"Hidan, I'd never marry myself off to anyone but you," I said in a stern tone, trying damnedest to show him how honest I was being. The crowd around us gasped in horror, and the guards that had stopped to watch the scene began towards us, and the priest declared, "That is quite enough!" He held his hands out to try and intercept the space between Hidan and I and I shook my head. I laughed thinking of how rusty I was considering it'd been so long since I'd had a good fight. All at once as the priest neared us, the guards started toward us as well, their swords unsheathed. I grabbed the long sides of my dress and gave a roundhouse kick, landing it right on the older man's chin. Hidan gave a smug smirk (probably considering I accidentally flashed my undies).

"H-hey, don't think you won't be next!" I grumbled in embarrassment, joining his side with my fists before me. Hidan laughed in amusement, of course. I sunk down on a bent knee allowing him to get a good swing with his scythe and popped back up to analyze the situation a moment. Hidan guffawed something about Jashin- naturally- and I counted each of our enemies.

"Nine of them... there's nine-" Hidan struck one down "-Eight, rather." Hidan continued slinging his weapon recklessly, his maniacal laughs reverberating through the room. I got a small running start and jumped up to push off his shoulders and flip through the air, kicking one of the soldiers on the back of his head; he dropped his sword upon impact, and I grabbed it. I marveled at how heavy it was: I could barely lift it with two hands. I muttered to myself disgruntled but assessed the fight once more trying to help how I could. I managed to effectively take a few of them out while Hidan made quick work of the others, using his ritualistic abilities to their fullest extent. To be honest, I thought it was pretty sexy... especially when he groaned in pleasure. It made me frown though- wasn't I the only person that was supposed to make him feel that way? _Hmph._

Soon the chapel settled into a somber silence. I looked at Hidan and smiled confidently; that smile shrunk as I asked, "Where did that twerp groom go?"

"Did you not even hear what his name was?" He asked. I shook my head and shrugged. It didn't matter much to me.

"No," he continued, "I didn't even see that he got away... I hope Jashin-sama won't be too disappointed."

"You couldn't help it, Hidan. I think he'll be happy either way," I said quietly in a bit of an awkward demeanor. His skin faded to its normal color. It was oddly calm outside, and this unsettled me. Hidan and I began our way to the large doors and out of them... shouldn't have more guards been coming to do something? Surely... Not many words had been exchanged between Hidan and I. It may've been because Hidan was still upset or that, well, words weren't needed. I couldn't figure it out. We smiled at each other reassuringly here and there and either looked to the ground or up in the sky. When we reached the gates, I heard a voice I was waiting on.

"Halt!" Hidan and I looked over our shoulders to find the large man that'd proposed the truce. He held up some contraption that I could identify- silverish and shiny, sleak and ominous-looking.

"You've broken our truce, Miss Minami," he stated. I turned to him, "That is true."

"You're wearing my patience thin," he said, fiddling with the thing he held out at me. I watched him for a moment as I began to feel nervous. When I didn't say anything more, he added on, "I, Masaaki Manabu, cannot tolerate this. I have given you many chances."

"If your patience is wearing thin, then I have to ask why you sent assassins on our tail in the first place," I called out sternly.

"Well, you see... the masquerade was a planned event. This was arranged to establish a connection between our land and your own- as the rogue ninja you are, through your death we could make alliance with Konohagakure and file against the Akatsuki. You rotten scum- you're unworthy of the title of a ninja."

Though surprised and a bit confused, I found it a bit funny. "How can you try to insult me like that while you murdered a man to simply start your plans up? I myself have only killed one person. You, your country, has done much worse. But I must ask, what would you do once you filed against us? Take control of Konoha?"

"This is none of your business, you pathetic girl!" Manabu yelled, "None!" As he yelled, he pulled the trigger of his weapon, and faster than I could register, I felt a searing pain above my right eyebrow, the noise of the shot echoing. My skin drained of its color, limbs convulsing uncontrollably. I fell to my knees and though my hearing was going in and out, I could faintly hear Hidan yelling, pleading me to get up. He rushed over and laid me on my back. He touched the wound lightly, blood pouring profusely from it. His eyes were wide as he yelled continuously. A ring of blackness enveloped my field of vision. Fury took hold of him as he raced toward them.

_"Minami," _came a voice. I wasn't sure where it'd originated... perhaps my own head? It grew blacker and blacker until I could see no longer. It remained that way a while, and I laid there in the dark, silence. I was really dead this time...?

"_Minami,"_ it rang again. It was clear like the ring of a bell. I tried to respond but I couldn't force it out of myself. I thought of Hidan alot of the time I stayed there in the dark, thinking of how he could be. If he was okay. My mind jumped from him to the rest of the organization, then to Naruto and his friends. Lady Rei. Himeko and the angels. My chest began to burn, and I felt as if I were on fire.

_"Deny it no longer,"_ the same voice commanded. And in an instant, it went from black to the view of Jashin, the animal skull less than a foot from my face. My heart raced. I couldn't speak, but this time around, I couldn't decide if it were out of physical incapability or my utter fear.

"You know what I speak of, Minami, and" Jashin added, "You are aware of what you must do. I by no means intend to force this of you- your soul itself speaks your thoughts. Each of them. You have wanted this. It's a very complex entity, your soul is. It is indecisive and weak at times. But it is confident all the same: level-headed and strong-willed. These are the characteristics of a Jashinist. Do this realm proud."

Yet again, colors came rushing back to sight and I sat up suddenly, my head pounding. I gasped for air and wiped the blood from my right eye. It was as if no time had passed at all. Hidan was still running toward the men when they all screamed in terror, looking past Hidan to me. He stopped himself and looked back at me. A wave of realization hit him and he yelled in joy. I could tell Hidan and I were going to have fun obliterating this place.

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OKAY, SO. I plan on some lovey-dovey shit going on next chapter, y'all.

Hooray, Mina's a Jashinist~


	27. Beneath the Abele

Here it is... The much anticipated and requested...

_**THE LEMON!**_

Not for little-peoples' eyes. Please tell me what you thought of this, because, well... I almost never post lemons. So yeah! Enjoy the citrusness! *nosebleed*

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Hidan pulled me by my waist roughly causing our chests to crash together: he heatedly kissed me, my arms wrapped around his neck tightly. He broke from my mouth and began planting quick kisses all across the span of my neck and a little groan slipped from me.

"Hidan..." I cooed quietly, "You know that I wouldn't run off for someone else, right?" He looked up at me suddenly, surprised. His mouth while remaining agape for a moment, smoothed out into a faint smile, "I think I know that-" he watched me shoot him a sarcastic, exasperated glare "-but you should prove it to me just in case. Better safe than sorry, right?" I blushed and chuckled lightly, my eyes narrowing a bit. The two of us stood under a beautiful salix alba (a white weeping willow for lack of better terms), looking straight into one another's eyes, sharing one of the most intimate moments we had up till that point. I held his cheek in my hands and I felt the stubble that adorned his chin. We had, in all actually, ravaged the Demon Country, and we had done in with greatest happiness and relief in our hearts. Hidan was still beyond excited that I'd finally converted- he showed me how to do rituals and how things worked along with little secret tips. We killed every man, woman, and child, and we burned each piece of wood and destroyed anything else that wasn't flammable. And as much as it pained me to admit that, I was immortal, and it wasn't like I'd be alive forever without doing something bad here and there. And if I wanted to spend that forever with Hidan, it definitely wouldn't be possible then.

We'd been traveling back home for a while when we decided to stop and rest for the night. I was off to get firewood, and Hidan was trying to make a small firepit. It was wintertime, and nights were long and chilly. Even in the early twilight, it was getting hard to see so we rushed back and forth doing what we needed to. But as we were tending to our duties, we caught each other's gaze- we caught each other's gaze, dropped everything in our grips, and hugged each other and here we are now. It was a beautiful night, and thinking of that fact and of everything else that'd been going on recently, I couldn't have been more thankful to be by Hidan at that moment.

A look of concern washed over me as I pushed a stray hair of his back atop his head. His arms rested at the small of my back, and almost upon instant detection of my worry, he let me go and held my wrists in his hands. "What's wrong, Mina-chan?"

"I... I'm just..." I took a deep breath, resisting the urge to cry, "I'm just really sorry, Hidan."

"Why? Did I do something wrong? ...Am I bad kisser?" The last question came out lowly and quickly. I shook my head profusely, "No, no! You're fine, Hidan, I mean... I'm sorry that you were so upset. Back at the chapel, you know." Hidan blushed a little and his hands fell to his sides, "Oh, that... don't worry about it. I was just a little fucking confused..."

"I didn't mean to hurt you. I was only doing it to ultimately get back to you," I said and pecked him on the lips, "I promise that." It grew quiet and I stepped back, crossing my arms.

"What was that for?"

"I just feel bad. Like I shouldn't be here with you. I should've explained what I was going to do," I said. His eyes widened a some, and he grabbed my shoulders jerkily, "Just stop with that, okay? Jashin. You act like everything is your fault when it's not! Like, damn! I know it doesn't seem like it, but I do have feelings and I don't think you realize that _I _am the one that should feel bad for so much shit it's crazy. It's just now that I'm even starting to get my shit together, alright? And to be honest, I... Well, nothing," he trailed off. I pleaded him to go on and he looked away, cheeks red to say: "I... don't want anyone but you... to stick around..." It came out in shaky, stuttery paused sentences, and that only intensified my growing smile. I took fistfuls of his Akatsuki cloak in my hands and pulled him down into the lush green grass with me. I straddled atop his hips and ran my fingers through his hair and he replied back to my fit of affection with his own sweet ferocity.

Never breaking the kiss (which was growing far more intense by each passing second), I took his hands in my own and placed them on my breasts, urging him to massage them. He didn't hesitate, and as he kneaded the mounds, he bit my bottom lip which caused waves of goosebumps to rise over my skin. Our lips disconnected and reconnected, noses brushing slightly here and there; Hidan's hands wandered to the obi that fastened my kimono closed and pulled it off to toss it somewhere nearby. I pulled away from him and shrugged out of the dress; I watched his hands graze against my bare shoulders as he helped me out of it. Those lightly calloused hands, once done away with the garments, returned to my skin, his fingers ghosting over my hips.

Hidan looked so concentrated, it made me giggle a bit. Upon noticing this, his features softened and he gave me a smile. I leaned forward once again, our chests rubbing together, and bit his earlobe, then traced the shell of his ear with my tongue. I kissed near there and nuzzled his cheek, "Take my bra off, Hidan." I could feel his hands barely shake as they climbed the length of my back to undo the fabric and peel it from me. I sat up and shyly twirled the ends of my hair as he admired me a moment, "Y'know, you don't have to stare me like I'm a piece of meat... and why are you being so quiet? It's weird, you're supposed to be a loud idiot!" His face fell and he stuck his tongue out at me. Sometimes I was glad he'd never really grow up.

"The fuck! I was just trying to let you do your thing for once, so I shut up and laid back for you!" He protested unhappily. He began to come up with another reason, but I put my hand over his mouth. His brows knitted together, and I left a kiss on his lips- another following- and we ensued where we left off. His hands cupped my breasts, thumbs rolling over my nipples. I moaned quietly and laced my fingers in his hair once more. Once we found a good rhythm, I started grinding our hips together. This pulled a husky growl from the back of his throat, and the very noise made my panties grow even more wet.

Hidan assisted me in getting him out of his cloak, and once that was through, I lowered my mouth to his abs to dust them with kisses and rub his growing erection through his pants. Hidan bucked a bit and watched me closely as I licked the zipper area of his pants.

"Shit, you're such a fucking tease, Mina-chan..." Hidan muttered in frustration. I grinned at him and shrugged a little, "I gotta make you want it, don't I?"

"Oh, I've wanted a night like this for a long ass time, I can tell you that much," he retorted. Hidan grabbed my hand to catch my full attention. It grew quiet, and his serious expression worried me some. His cheeks grew flushed, "You know, you're, umm... you're really pretty." An army of butterflies (or something of the like) unleashed in my stomach: I blushed hard and thanked him nervously and much to his fortune, I slid his pants down to expose his throbbing erection. He gave me a toothy smile and winked at me which effectively turned my knees to jelly, "You want my dick, don't you, Mina-chan?"

I stroked his thick length slowly and give the head a little lick, "I want it bad, Hidan."It came out in a sort of moan, and from what I could tell, he liked that. I put his cock in my mouth and swirled my tongue around it, sucking all the while. Hidan groaned and he grabbed my breasts roughly, playing and tugging on my nipple as I worked. I stroked him lovingly and licked his balls, taking each into my mouth to give them more than enough attention. Hidan approved this of course and somewhere between it all, a hand of his found a place on my head, pulling my hair when I made his toes curl. After a bit, he pulled me up to his face, saying my name and kissing me.

"It's your turn, Mina-chan," he whispered in my ear. A shiver ran through my body and he pushed me on my back. He went ahead and pulled his pants all the way off, then did the same with my panties. He took one of my feet in his grasp and kissed the inside of my foot, trailing up to my calf, my inner thigh, and then to my sacred spot.

"You've never been eaten out, have you?" Hidan asked smugly. A shade of rosy crimson dusted across my cheeks, and I shyly denied. He smiled in sheer confidence, licking my skin languidly. He took two fingers and rubbed above my clit then dragged them down to my entrance. He spread my skin, feeling how wet I was. He chuckled darkly, "My, my... I didn't know you were _this_ excited, Mina-chan." I whined in embarrassment and he dipped his fingers in, pulling another noise from me. A little gasp followed, encouraging the Jashinist on. He began pumping his fingers into me, twisting them to massage in all the right places. I let my roll to the side and moaned while he hummed in satisfaction, then licking above his fingers. When he grazed my small jewel, I clenched around his fingers; he intensified his pace, and upon continuation of these ministrations, I soundly orgasmed, feeling a wave of pleasure rush over me.

I quivered after coming, and he almost immediately noticed- this made him laugh and rub my side before leaning in to engage in another kiss. I could taste myself on his tongue and that in itself made me want Hidan in me even more. Our bodies connected, hands wandering to each crevice of each other. I could feel his penis against my skin; our breathing was sharp and shallow. Between the kissing and my shaking, my head was spinning. I'd never felt so vulnerable yet so loved all at once. I'd never imagined till as of late that this man, Hidan, could make me feel such emotions. I'd never been so sure that things were right. I reached down to his dick and slowly stroked it, Hidan's mouth was on my collarbone, and I could hear him making utterly delicious noises. He thrust his appendage into my hand with a grunt, and I bit my lip.

"Go... go easy at first, Hidan," I whispered nervously. He shook his head, understandingly. His forehead was covered in a sheen layer of sweat, and my own wasn't far from the same. He used a hand to his dick at my vagina and he pushed in slowly. I winced, clenching my teeth. Hidan froze and looked at me in worry, asking if I was alright... but this was what I wanted. What he wanted. I nodded, taking a deep breath, "It's really thick is all." This made Hidan's ego build some, but he held back any comments for a later date.

"Will... you be okay? It's not half way in..." I was _utterly_ **_terrified._ **He wasn't even halfway in?! I know, I know, guys always wanna "beat dat pussy", but _this?! _I finally told him to just go ahead, and he did so cautiously, watching my expression. When he filled me to the brim (and them some), I gasped sharply, digging my nails into his muscular back. He began putting a little motion into it, and I remained very tense and very uncomfortable, even when the fits of pleasure began to ensue. I scraped my hands over his flesh as he slowly pounded again and again. We watched each other, eyes half-lidded. His hands were at either sides of my shoulders, his face reading lovedrunk. A soft cold breeze rustled among the trees and the sound of us becoming a whole, our love-making all that was heard. Our heartbeats found synchronized rhythm. Hidan quickened from the slow, deep pace to a faster and rougher one. My head was swimming as I moaned, not even giving a damn if I was being loud. He eventually caught hold of my wrists, his tongue lingering on my chest.

I looked down at him and watched his cock go in and out of me, making me blush harder and harder. Hidan's grunts became more frequent, his movements just the same, and when he told me he was close and began to pull out, I bucked my hips and pushed him down to me with my foot. This night... this night was wonderful, and when he came and made sure I did as well, we both fell into that state of sleepy that seemed too surreal and beautiful to be true. We lie naked, facing each other, eye to eye in the darkening night. I had his hand close to my chest, and we shared stories quietly. After a while, we both got quiet, and I felt a blush rise to my cheeks when I scooted closer to him to give him a peck on the lips and say: "I love you, Hidan."

He didn't reply at first, but even through the dark, I could feel him smile largely. He pulled me into his chest, hugging me, "I love you, too."

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Well, there's an update for you!

...

I cried, not even kidding. T^T

Hope you liked! Tell me how the lemon was!


	28. Renewal

Here's an update because cliche love stories are cliche. I'm gonna finally go and try to fix this fucked up story some. Feel free to give criticism, I'd love it!

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Hidan and I lie atop Beppin's smooth, feathery back. Said bird summoning released a caw which echoed through the sky that was spotted with clouds resembling her own downy feathers. He and I had our fingers laced behind our heads watching the colors of the days pass us by.

"How long had I been gone?" I asked out of the blue. Hidan grunted then paused, "I can't even remember exactly myself- long enough for everyone and their moms to get worked up though, that's for sure. Two weeks perhaps." I scoffed in surprise and winced.

"Himeko met up with Naruto when he was on his way to be a hero and 'rescue' you," he explained blandly, "a fucking miracle Kakuzu didn't get a hold of him."

"You..." I looked to him with wide eyes, "Naruto... he's okay?"

"Well, yeah," Hidan retorted sharply, "You really thought I'd let him get his ass kicked by the old bastard? I'm not that mean!" I laughed loudly and couldn't help disagreeing (particularly when it came to Naruto of all people). A thin smile still formed across my lips, I inhaled deeply. "You made sure he was alright for me, didn't you?"

"It's not that big a deal, Mina-chan..." Hidan replied hastily, blushing and feeling flustered. The air around him seemed to change quickly though as he sat up and grabbed my arm, "I do need to tell you something though, seriously."

"What is it, Hidan?"

"Itachi... Itachi is gone," he muttered, "And we haven't heard from Kisame or Sasuke's group." My heart dropped, my throat tight and warm and tingling. Hidan expressed to me that Sasuke figured out the fact Itachi never died and did something about it. Pressumably Kisame fell to the same fate considering Suigetsu's hunt for said man. That meant two people of my makeshift family wouldn't be returning... and trying to keep strong, I didn't cry like a little kid this time around. I did my best to keep a composed front, smiling with my head lowered.

"Are you alright, Mina-chan?" He asked in a bout of suspicion; it was obvious that my reaction was different from what we both would have guessed it to be. Clenching my fists, I gazed into the azure sky and laughed, "I... I honestly couldn't be better, Hidan. You know what? I'm actually... thankful! For this!" I stood up on unstable feet and threw my hands in the rushing air.

"I... I, Himura Minami, will _prove_ what it's like to protect those that are dear to me. I'm not the perfect example of what an S-rank criminal should be and I'm not very smart, but... I am determined to show everyone that I'm not just a stagehand!" Hidan laughed and tugged me down roughly onto his lap by the end of my kimono and held me for a bit, his nose rubbing my cheek. "Would you protect me, Minami-chan?" I blushed and leaned back onto his chest lightly. "In a heartbeat, Hidan. When I told you I loved you, that meant more than just that I find you handsome or that I like you. I've never told anyone 'I love you.' I said it to you because you're special- because, well, you're my whole heart... I don't know what I'd do without you... And a part of me wonders what it would've been like had we not met as ninjas and been able to do as we pleased. I'm thankful though, that this all happened."

Hidan laughed in that deep voice of his that nearly made me melt on spot. I looked at him questioningly, and he let out a long sigh, "You just like the dick, don't you?"

I felt the blood rush to my face quickly as I made a sound of detest and slipped from his grasp to sit some ways away from him unhappily. He laughed harder, "Well, I like it. I can tell you do to. And that's not to say I like your body as much as mine." Hidan said, his arrogance blowing his head up to ten times its normal size. I angrily glared back at him, "No! I don't like your dick! It sucks!"

"As good as you do, hm?" That bastard of a Jashinist asked. I carefully considered slitting my own throat but then remember that I was now a Jashinist... therefore immortal. I sulked silently and buried my face in my hands. My blush reignited though, when I felt him hug me again just like before. His chin was propped onto my shoulder. I slapped his leg which was around my own and told him to get lost.

"You just don't get it, do you?" He chuckled, "I suck, Minami-chan. I suck a lot. Especially when it comes to feelings or try to make you smile. I suck because I think it's so fucking funny and find it a turn on to make you mad. I suck when it comes to words that aren't meant to be sexual innuendos... I guess I seriously have to try though, don't I?" Hidan suddenly caught my attention with that, and I stopped trying to push him away.

"I'm a bastard for living so long and still acting like a stupid fool ninety-nine percent of the time just because it's fun. I'm a bastard for not trying to explain myself before flipping shit on people. Frankly, I'm just a dedicated asshole that doesn't care about anything materialistic- I only care about Jashin. And a certain girl, of course. But I can never explain how I feel to her without getting all embarrassed and blushing almost as hard as she does. I can never stress enough... just how much it means that she cares as much as she does. That she's finally a Jashinist and it's mainly so I won't feel alone anymore but also because there's something so special about her that even Jashin-sama sees it. I've been alive for longer than I can even fucking remember and once I gave up on ever being happy with another human being, she just shows up and bitches at me in a certain way and has me around her finger. She's the first girl that I've ever genuinely... been able to care about without being afraid of her dying on me. It's almost a little silly. I can't even say this to her directly, but... I love her."

I couldn't have explained the smile on my face at that moment- I could feel tears threatening to start up in my eyes. I managed to turn around and straddle his hips and plant a sweet kiss on his lips. When I pulled back, I could see his cheeks were red and his beautiful eyes were watching my own carefully. I touched his neck gingerly, "Why can't you say it directly to me?" The red on his face deepened many shades and he struggled for words.

"I... Mina-chan..." He sputtered helplessly, "Because I... I've n-never really talked to a girl... like that..." I laughed kissed him once more, "Well, start off small! Hidan?" He gulped and nodded questioningly.

"I love you, Hidan," I said with a small smile, then held his face in my hands feeling the curves of his chin.

"I... I love you, too... Mina-chan..." He replied. All at once, I hopped off of him and couldn't help but to laugh my ass off thoroughly. His expression twisted quickly into anger, "Wh-what're you laughing at, you bitch?!"

"You're just so... so funny, Hidan," I said and wiped a tear from my eye, "You're cute. Oh, is it your turn to pout now?" Hidan had turned from my view to ponder on his words awkwardly. I just laughed again and once he stopped with the pity party, we kept talking about everything that popped into mind. Soon enough, we arrived back home and made our way into the hideout.


End file.
